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Mostly cringe-y images of Nice Guys™
2010.06.30 20:03 cryptogirl Mostly cringe-y images of Nice Guys™
Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. This is a lighthearted subreddit for funny, cringey images, NOT a subreddit for showcasing general acts of misogyny or for debating gender roles. Please be sure to understand the concept of Virtue Claim as explained in the rules as it is a core requirement of posts in the sub.
2019.07.03 01:39 Philosophantom16 bropill
Bropill: A subreddit for encouraging positive attitudes, wholesome memes, and what it means to be a bro.
2008.03.19 17:17 Men's Rights :: Advocating for the social and legal equality of men and boys since 2008
At the most basic level, men's rights are the legal rights that are granted to men. However, any issue that pertains to men's relationship to society is also a topic suitable for this subreddit. Men's rights are influenced by the way men are perceived by others. WARNING: Some other subs have bots that will ban you if you post or comment here.
2024.05.16 10:54 No-Penalty-4205 S2 EP3
With this mouse spooky spaghetti shit i jus keep getting dragged more and more in. This mf is unbeleivable. So first off ALL of their numbers and names get posted, the new personal numbers. They told her they couldnt have a bday party for her because of safety reasons (but they planned the suprise party behind her back). She then went to Dr. Sullivan and was saying “im annoyed because im not afraid and my friends are so they cant throw me a party” or somethin along those lines. She then apparently requested removal for the post, seemingly ticked off. Once they removed the post shes all excited, like jumping and shit; she goes to her friends and says shes PART OF THE SPOOKY SPAGHETTI MODERATION TEAM. Im not sure if she MADE the website or what but theres something SEVERALY OFF about her and its so bad. Especially how bloody rose didnt let her have her surprise sweet 16, i feel like theres a reason… like rose knows she deserves to be targeted. With the whole fake names and meeting up w old men, dressing up… ion even kno anymore w this girl bruh. AND HER CURSED GRANDMA LIKE WTF IS GOIN ONN😭😭
submitted by No-Penalty-4205 to PLLOriginalSin [link] [comments]
2024.05.16 10:52 Adeptus_Gedeon Few Lovecraftian inspirations from the real life and beliefs
The article is intended primarily for Game Masters who play games in settings inspired by Lovecraft’s works. However, I hope that other fans of cosmic horror will also find something for themselves here. The interesting facts presented here may also be entertaining for people who do not know the work of The Loner of Providence, but some of the references may be unclear to them. The article contains several anecdotes – either from real history or from beliefs that exist in the real world, and suggestions on how they can be related to the Cthulhu mythology. So read about:
Ancient, super-advanced, fallen civilizations are one of the favorite motifs of fantasy. And truth be told, something similar happened in real history. Of course, in reality, the fallen civilizations did not have sci-fi supertechnology at their disposal, but their collapse still led to great destabilization. We are talking about the invasion of the so-called Sea Peoples, which took place at the turn of the 13th and 12th centuries BC. The Sea Peoples are mobile and warlike groups of people of unknown origin. They caused the collapse of several advanced cultures, including: Mycenaean and Hittite. Only the Egyptians managed to defeat them in a great battle. Well, the material for Lovecraftian inspiration is obvious. A mysterious army, coming out of nowhere, called the „Sea Peoples”, leading to the fall of the most powerful human civilizations at that time? Let us add that, according to some historians, the descendants of the Sea Peoples destroyed by the Egyptians were the Philistines. Yes, the same Philistines, one of whose main deities was the well-known Dagon to Lovecraftomaniacs… Deep Ones say hello. Let us also add that, according to Egyptian records, the tribes of the Sea Peoples had names such as Ekvesh, Teresh, Lucki, Sherden, Shekelesh, Tekel and Peleset. Sounds suitably dark, blasphemous and filthy? If we want to dig deeper, one of the pharaohs who ruled Egypt was Akhenaten – yes, that heretic who tried to replace the worship of traditional Egyptian gods with the religion of the Aten and who is very much liked by conspiracy theorists. Let’s add to the mix that Middle Eastern cultures had quite a negative attitude towards the sea as such. Babylonian Marduk had to defeat the giant monsters of Chaos – Apsu and Tiamat, personifications of fresh and salt waters, respectively. The Bible also contains traces of the myth about the fight between Yahweh and Leviathan, and the Book of Revelation, describing the new, ideal world, emphasizes that „I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more.” Let’s assume that the players are researchers of an antiquity – historians, archaeologists, etc. They conduct research on the Sea Peoples. Of course, as common sense dictates, they assume that these were human warriors. However, as time goes on, more and more evidence appears that they were not completely human again, and the evidence of their monstrosity becomes increasingly difficult to put down to the demonization that Egyptian chroniclers used against their enemies… It becomes clear that an onslaught of inhuman and semi-human monsters came from the sea. , trying to conquer the world of that time. Moreover, after their defeat at the hands of the Egyptians, this species did not become extinct, but instead of open conquest it switched to cautious infiltration. Perhaps the Deep Ones have spies in academia who are tasked with eliminating historians who find the trail of truth…
Oh, one more interesting fact connecting the history of the Sea Peoples with Lovecraft. Well, as we know, HPL liked to use the term „Cyclopean” for huge, monumental buildings. At least he didn’t come up with it himself. Well, when the later (and at first more primitive) inhabitants, the Dorians, saw the ruins of destroyed castles left by the Mycenaean culture, they came to the conclusion that such huge buildings could not have been built by human hands, so they were probably the work of mythical giants – cyclopes.
Typhon – a classic but forgotten abomination
Modern works drawing on Greek mythology usually make Hades (completely senseless) or Kronos (a little more) the Big Bad, but they forget about Zeus’s greatest enemy – Typhon. After defeating the titans and then the gigants, the Olympian gods had to face the main boss on the way to dominating the world – Typhon. Here is an example of its description: It was larger than the largest mountains, its head touched the stars. When he stretched out his hands, one reached the eastern ends of the world and the other reached the western ends. Instead of fingers, he had a hundred dragon heads. From the waist down he had a tangle of vipers (yay, tentacles!) and wings at his shoulders. His eyes were shooting out flames. In other versions of the myth, Typhon was a flying, hundred-headed dragon. In any case – appearance and stature worthy of the Great Old One. Typhon attacked Olympus, and all the gods except Zeus fled in panic. The supreme god took up the fight… and lost it. Only in the second duel did he manage to defeat Typhon, but not kill him – he only imprisoned him, hitting him with Etna. In the sense of a mountain. A volcano – and volcanic activity is the result of Typhon’s anger, trying to break free. Typhon equaled the lord of heaven not only in strength, but in fertility. His wife was Echidna, about whom Hesiod wrote: „She also gave birth to another creature, invincible, huge, unlike neither men nor immortal gods, in a hollow cave – the divine violent Echidna, half a sharp-eyed young girl, with beautiful cheeks, half a huge snake, a great and powerful, spotted, cruel – in the depths of the holy land. This pair spawned many, if not most, of the monsters found in Greek mythology. Their offspring were very diverse and strange, as befits the spawn of enemies of the divine order, including: – Ladon, the hundred-headed dragon who never slept and guarded the apples that gave immortality, – Cerberus – we all know the dog guarding the gates of hell… but not all of us know that, according to some accounts, it had not three heads, but as many as 50, it was also covered with scales, and it had a snake by its tail… so what does this have to do with a dog? – Scylla – this lady inherited the most from the human, beautiful part of Echidna… at least initially, but eventually, as a result of various perturbations, she turned from a beautiful nymph to her siblings, becoming a six-headed sea beast, so hideous, according to Homer, that even the gods could not stand sight of her – she dwelt in a cave, from where she opened her mouth to devour the crews of ships, – Gorgons – I mean, those ladies with snake hair, not monstrous bulls. Medusa was one of them – the story that Athena turned her priestess into a monster as punishment for being raped by Poseidon is an invention of later poets, – Lernaean Hydra – a multi-headed monster with many reptilian or human heads. In place of each severed head, two others grew, and in addition, the main head was completely immortal – therefore, after chopping off the mortal heads, Heracles had to burn the stumps and bury the immortal, still hissing head underground. Hydra’s breath was poisonous. – various other creatures, such as the Sphinx, the dog Ortus, the Nemean Lion or the Chimera. Each of these descendants has the potential to be portrayed as an Eldritch abomination in its own right. To be precise – according to some accounts, the father of these creatures (and Echidna herself) was Typhon, but a monstrous, ancient (older than Poseidon) sea god, Phorcys. How to use Typhon? Well, Typhon clearly has the potential to be a Great Old One, imprisoned by… Nodens? Some other Elder God? Weak gods of humanity? Maybe his cult is trying to free him from Etna? What if he succeeds? What might distinguish Typhon from many other Great Old Ones? I would recommend focusing on his monster progenitor aspect – if he manages to reunite with Echidna, they will immediately start spawning various blasphemous beasts in series.
Jan Twardowski – the first man on the Moon
Jan (John) Twardowski, the hero of the legend, a Polish nobleman who allegedly sold his soul to the devil and became a sorcerer. Probably a historical figure, according to legend he lived in the 16th century and became famous for summoning the spirit of the deceased queen for King Sigismund Augustus. The ghost allegedly appeared in the mirror. This mirror is still kept in the church in Węgrów. According to legend, when the terms of the pact were fulfilled, devils came to kidnap Twardowski to hell. Interestingly, instead of taking the sorcerer’s soul after death, the most material demons appeared and grabbed Twardowski in order to kidnap him bodily, alive… and instead of heading towards the underground, which in legends is considered the traditional place of residence of demons and damned souls, they began to carry away up with him. At some point, Twardowski started singing religious songs, which caused the demons to escape, leaving him on the Moon, where he is said to have stayed ever since. Could the “demons” actually be extraterrestrials? Maybe mi-go? Maybe Twardowski was their agent and obtained secret knowledge and technology from them that gave him the fame of a sorcerer? As part of his studies, did he acquire knowledge of a system of sounds („religious songs”) that was able to drive away his masters when they decided that his usefulness on Earth had ended and it was time to transport him to a space base where he would be transformed into a brain in jar? Or was transportation to the Moon part of the deal from the beginning? Oh, one more interesting fact – according to legends, Twardowski used to use a rooster as a horse, which he enlarged with his magic. It’s easy to imagine an abomination that, in the eyes of laymen, might have resembled a large rooster… Examples of scenario hooks: – Twardowski’s secret mirror is still in the church in Węgrów. The local priest thinks it is just other „pagan” superstitions, but in fact it is a tool enabling contact with cosmic beings and higher realities. It may prove useful to players if they convince the priest to give it back or simply steal it. – Players are looking for Twardowski’s notes to gain knowledge about the „song” thanks to which he drove away mi-go (or other creatures that became the prototype of the „devils” from the legend). The so-called Twardowski’s „School” or „Cathedral” was located in a quarry near Kraków. In fact, at the end of the 19th century, during the construction of the church of St. Józef, a cave showing traces of alchemical experiments was discovered… And it was destroyed. But perhaps there is a second, secret laboratory under the cave that escaped destruction? And there lie Twardowski’s secrets… And again, potential obstacles may be placed by the local parish priest. But not only him. Maybe Twardowski’s legendary „rooster” lies dormant in the laboratory and was left by the sorcerer as a guard? – players are astronauts on the Moon. However, it turns out that someone lives here, someone who was not detected by previous expeditions and probes. Will Twardowski prove to be an ally in the fight against cosmic horrors? Or maybe their agent, or an independent villain? If he survived this long on the Moon thanks to blasphemous secrets, it’s possible that he had little humanity left…
The rest of the text is avalaible (of course, for free) here: https://adeptusrpg.wordpress.com/2024/05/13/some-lovecraftian-inspiration-form-real-life-and-beliefs/
submitted by Adeptus_Gedeon to gurps [link] [comments]
- Sea Peoples, bane of ancient civilizations,
- a forgotten Eldritch abomination from Greek mythology,
- Jan Twardowski, the first man on the Moon,
- mathematicians and physicists who wanted to know the structure of reality and lost their minds,
- one of the most mysterious characters from the Bible and a dark, occult ritual that underlies monotheism.
Ancient, super-advanced, fallen civilizations are one of the favorite motifs of fantasy. And truth be told, something similar happened in real history. Of course, in reality, the fallen civilizations did not have sci-fi supertechnology at their disposal, but their collapse still led to great destabilization. We are talking about the invasion of the so-called Sea Peoples, which took place at the turn of the 13th and 12th centuries BC. The Sea Peoples are mobile and warlike groups of people of unknown origin. They caused the collapse of several advanced cultures, including: Mycenaean and Hittite. Only the Egyptians managed to defeat them in a great battle. Well, the material for Lovecraftian inspiration is obvious. A mysterious army, coming out of nowhere, called the „Sea Peoples”, leading to the fall of the most powerful human civilizations at that time? Let us add that, according to some historians, the descendants of the Sea Peoples destroyed by the Egyptians were the Philistines. Yes, the same Philistines, one of whose main deities was the well-known Dagon to Lovecraftomaniacs… Deep Ones say hello. Let us also add that, according to Egyptian records, the tribes of the Sea Peoples had names such as Ekvesh, Teresh, Lucki, Sherden, Shekelesh, Tekel and Peleset. Sounds suitably dark, blasphemous and filthy? If we want to dig deeper, one of the pharaohs who ruled Egypt was Akhenaten – yes, that heretic who tried to replace the worship of traditional Egyptian gods with the religion of the Aten and who is very much liked by conspiracy theorists. Let’s add to the mix that Middle Eastern cultures had quite a negative attitude towards the sea as such. Babylonian Marduk had to defeat the giant monsters of Chaos – Apsu and Tiamat, personifications of fresh and salt waters, respectively. The Bible also contains traces of the myth about the fight between Yahweh and Leviathan, and the Book of Revelation, describing the new, ideal world, emphasizes that „I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more.” Let’s assume that the players are researchers of an antiquity – historians, archaeologists, etc. They conduct research on the Sea Peoples. Of course, as common sense dictates, they assume that these were human warriors. However, as time goes on, more and more evidence appears that they were not completely human again, and the evidence of their monstrosity becomes increasingly difficult to put down to the demonization that Egyptian chroniclers used against their enemies… It becomes clear that an onslaught of inhuman and semi-human monsters came from the sea. , trying to conquer the world of that time. Moreover, after their defeat at the hands of the Egyptians, this species did not become extinct, but instead of open conquest it switched to cautious infiltration. Perhaps the Deep Ones have spies in academia who are tasked with eliminating historians who find the trail of truth…
Oh, one more interesting fact connecting the history of the Sea Peoples with Lovecraft. Well, as we know, HPL liked to use the term „Cyclopean” for huge, monumental buildings. At least he didn’t come up with it himself. Well, when the later (and at first more primitive) inhabitants, the Dorians, saw the ruins of destroyed castles left by the Mycenaean culture, they came to the conclusion that such huge buildings could not have been built by human hands, so they were probably the work of mythical giants – cyclopes.
Typhon – a classic but forgotten abomination
Modern works drawing on Greek mythology usually make Hades (completely senseless) or Kronos (a little more) the Big Bad, but they forget about Zeus’s greatest enemy – Typhon. After defeating the titans and then the gigants, the Olympian gods had to face the main boss on the way to dominating the world – Typhon. Here is an example of its description: It was larger than the largest mountains, its head touched the stars. When he stretched out his hands, one reached the eastern ends of the world and the other reached the western ends. Instead of fingers, he had a hundred dragon heads. From the waist down he had a tangle of vipers (yay, tentacles!) and wings at his shoulders. His eyes were shooting out flames. In other versions of the myth, Typhon was a flying, hundred-headed dragon. In any case – appearance and stature worthy of the Great Old One. Typhon attacked Olympus, and all the gods except Zeus fled in panic. The supreme god took up the fight… and lost it. Only in the second duel did he manage to defeat Typhon, but not kill him – he only imprisoned him, hitting him with Etna. In the sense of a mountain. A volcano – and volcanic activity is the result of Typhon’s anger, trying to break free. Typhon equaled the lord of heaven not only in strength, but in fertility. His wife was Echidna, about whom Hesiod wrote: „She also gave birth to another creature, invincible, huge, unlike neither men nor immortal gods, in a hollow cave – the divine violent Echidna, half a sharp-eyed young girl, with beautiful cheeks, half a huge snake, a great and powerful, spotted, cruel – in the depths of the holy land. This pair spawned many, if not most, of the monsters found in Greek mythology. Their offspring were very diverse and strange, as befits the spawn of enemies of the divine order, including: – Ladon, the hundred-headed dragon who never slept and guarded the apples that gave immortality, – Cerberus – we all know the dog guarding the gates of hell… but not all of us know that, according to some accounts, it had not three heads, but as many as 50, it was also covered with scales, and it had a snake by its tail… so what does this have to do with a dog? – Scylla – this lady inherited the most from the human, beautiful part of Echidna… at least initially, but eventually, as a result of various perturbations, she turned from a beautiful nymph to her siblings, becoming a six-headed sea beast, so hideous, according to Homer, that even the gods could not stand sight of her – she dwelt in a cave, from where she opened her mouth to devour the crews of ships, – Gorgons – I mean, those ladies with snake hair, not monstrous bulls. Medusa was one of them – the story that Athena turned her priestess into a monster as punishment for being raped by Poseidon is an invention of later poets, – Lernaean Hydra – a multi-headed monster with many reptilian or human heads. In place of each severed head, two others grew, and in addition, the main head was completely immortal – therefore, after chopping off the mortal heads, Heracles had to burn the stumps and bury the immortal, still hissing head underground. Hydra’s breath was poisonous. – various other creatures, such as the Sphinx, the dog Ortus, the Nemean Lion or the Chimera. Each of these descendants has the potential to be portrayed as an Eldritch abomination in its own right. To be precise – according to some accounts, the father of these creatures (and Echidna herself) was Typhon, but a monstrous, ancient (older than Poseidon) sea god, Phorcys. How to use Typhon? Well, Typhon clearly has the potential to be a Great Old One, imprisoned by… Nodens? Some other Elder God? Weak gods of humanity? Maybe his cult is trying to free him from Etna? What if he succeeds? What might distinguish Typhon from many other Great Old Ones? I would recommend focusing on his monster progenitor aspect – if he manages to reunite with Echidna, they will immediately start spawning various blasphemous beasts in series.
Jan Twardowski – the first man on the Moon
Jan (John) Twardowski, the hero of the legend, a Polish nobleman who allegedly sold his soul to the devil and became a sorcerer. Probably a historical figure, according to legend he lived in the 16th century and became famous for summoning the spirit of the deceased queen for King Sigismund Augustus. The ghost allegedly appeared in the mirror. This mirror is still kept in the church in Węgrów. According to legend, when the terms of the pact were fulfilled, devils came to kidnap Twardowski to hell. Interestingly, instead of taking the sorcerer’s soul after death, the most material demons appeared and grabbed Twardowski in order to kidnap him bodily, alive… and instead of heading towards the underground, which in legends is considered the traditional place of residence of demons and damned souls, they began to carry away up with him. At some point, Twardowski started singing religious songs, which caused the demons to escape, leaving him on the Moon, where he is said to have stayed ever since. Could the “demons” actually be extraterrestrials? Maybe mi-go? Maybe Twardowski was their agent and obtained secret knowledge and technology from them that gave him the fame of a sorcerer? As part of his studies, did he acquire knowledge of a system of sounds („religious songs”) that was able to drive away his masters when they decided that his usefulness on Earth had ended and it was time to transport him to a space base where he would be transformed into a brain in jar? Or was transportation to the Moon part of the deal from the beginning? Oh, one more interesting fact – according to legends, Twardowski used to use a rooster as a horse, which he enlarged with his magic. It’s easy to imagine an abomination that, in the eyes of laymen, might have resembled a large rooster… Examples of scenario hooks: – Twardowski’s secret mirror is still in the church in Węgrów. The local priest thinks it is just other „pagan” superstitions, but in fact it is a tool enabling contact with cosmic beings and higher realities. It may prove useful to players if they convince the priest to give it back or simply steal it. – Players are looking for Twardowski’s notes to gain knowledge about the „song” thanks to which he drove away mi-go (or other creatures that became the prototype of the „devils” from the legend). The so-called Twardowski’s „School” or „Cathedral” was located in a quarry near Kraków. In fact, at the end of the 19th century, during the construction of the church of St. Józef, a cave showing traces of alchemical experiments was discovered… And it was destroyed. But perhaps there is a second, secret laboratory under the cave that escaped destruction? And there lie Twardowski’s secrets… And again, potential obstacles may be placed by the local parish priest. But not only him. Maybe Twardowski’s legendary „rooster” lies dormant in the laboratory and was left by the sorcerer as a guard? – players are astronauts on the Moon. However, it turns out that someone lives here, someone who was not detected by previous expeditions and probes. Will Twardowski prove to be an ally in the fight against cosmic horrors? Or maybe their agent, or an independent villain? If he survived this long on the Moon thanks to blasphemous secrets, it’s possible that he had little humanity left…
The rest of the text is avalaible (of course, for free) here: https://adeptusrpg.wordpress.com/2024/05/13/some-lovecraftian-inspiration-form-real-life-and-beliefs/
2024.05.16 10:50 AutoModerator IF YOUR NAME IS JONATHAN, YOU SHOULD SPEND YOUR MONDAYS DOING THIS
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/DdJxUSevYf0
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2024.05.16 10:44 Loginnerer [2010-2020] Old white man whose whole schtick was that he tried to appear weak and harmless to hide in plain sight, but really was a physically capable murderer. Possibly with glasses and a fedora-like hat. Maybe a cane.
- Movie may have started with a white woman aged 25-35, being driven at night to a far off town for the purpose of investigation. She may have sat in the backseat, and was discussing what they would get into, with 1 or 2 men aged about the same.
- There was a scene where the old man was driving a car slowly, to stalk some other guy who was on foot. Possibly at the victims workplace.
- Near the end of the movie, another important character dies by this old mans hand, sitting upright, back against a tree. They died just after learning the truth about the old man, but it was too late.
- The old man and investigator(s?) were in contact several times, but never did anyone really suspect him, as the old man managed to play the role of an affable and cooperative townie.
- Name of the movie may have sounded like a name that a town might have. "Blackwood", "Blackriver" or something, but obviously not it.
2024.05.16 10:42 Loginnerer [TOMT][MOVIE][2010-2020] Old white man whose whole schtick was that he tried to appear weak and harmless to hide in plain sight, but really was a physically capable murderer. Possibly with glasses and a fedora-like hat. Maybe a cane.
- Movie may have started with a white woman aged 25-35, being driven at night to a far off town for the purpose of investigation. She may have sat in the backseat, and was discussing what they would get into, with 1 or 2 men aged about the same.
- There was a scene where the old man was driving a car slowly, to stalk some other guy who was on foot. Possibly at the victims workplace.
- Near the end of the movie, another important character dies by this old mans hand, sitting upright, back against a tree. They died just after learning the truth about the old man, but it was too late.
- The old man and investigator(s?) were in contact several times, but never did anyone really suspect him, as the old man managed to play the role of an affable and cooperative townie.
- Name of the movie may have sounded like a name that a town might have. "Blackwood", "Blackriver" or something, but obviously not it.
2024.05.16 10:27 Maczino A Fundamental Cornerstone of Wokeness: Hatred of Police
The woke hate amongst many things soap and water, factual knowledge, and all things law and order (not the TV show). The “order” in that being police—the very men and women who protect these scab’s ability to speak freely without fear of reprisals. This one bothers me to the core for a few personal reasons, first and foremost my uncle (dad’s brother) was a police officer who was shot and killed by an illegal alien. Secondly, my father (getting ready to retire), and my younger brother are both cops—as well as a cousin, and countless family friends are all cops. So for me, this anti-cop rhetoric is not only personal for me, but also the rhetoric that these woke “geniuses” aren’t going to ever be able to get a win on—and I’ll explain why.
The Democratic Party relies upon police as much as everyone else does, a nation of laws will not be able to survive without that. Now, that “Defund The Police” bullshit was pushed hard by a group of crazies on the left—all lying in some form about police interactions with minority criminals. However, with all the bullshit they pushed, nobody has actually defunded a police department—meaning that there aren’t any actual jurisdictions not under a police command. What that did do however was make entire police unions, which typically gave support to whatever party promised them better terms in collective bargaining, turn against Democrats completely.
Michael Brown was a criminal thug who pulled a strong-arm robbery, and was anointed by the left as a gentle-giant/saint. George Floyd was high on fentanyl while trying to pay for cigarettes with fake money—a criminal act, and he died do to his heart failure when he got wild and panicked while resisting arrest—Derek Chauvin was a fall man due to a Muslim Marxist being the Attorney General of Minnesota. These are whom the left have used in the name of martyrdom—absolute shitbag humans.
Here in lies the question: Being that the woke will never get their anti-cop rhetoric to stick, will they ever stop glorifying criminal conduct? The glorification of criminal behavior works against them—which I am sure we are delighted to see them take a big loss at any point.
Stay Blessed!
submitted by Maczino to EndWokeism [link] [comments]
The Democratic Party relies upon police as much as everyone else does, a nation of laws will not be able to survive without that. Now, that “Defund The Police” bullshit was pushed hard by a group of crazies on the left—all lying in some form about police interactions with minority criminals. However, with all the bullshit they pushed, nobody has actually defunded a police department—meaning that there aren’t any actual jurisdictions not under a police command. What that did do however was make entire police unions, which typically gave support to whatever party promised them better terms in collective bargaining, turn against Democrats completely.
Michael Brown was a criminal thug who pulled a strong-arm robbery, and was anointed by the left as a gentle-giant/saint. George Floyd was high on fentanyl while trying to pay for cigarettes with fake money—a criminal act, and he died do to his heart failure when he got wild and panicked while resisting arrest—Derek Chauvin was a fall man due to a Muslim Marxist being the Attorney General of Minnesota. These are whom the left have used in the name of martyrdom—absolute shitbag humans.
Here in lies the question: Being that the woke will never get their anti-cop rhetoric to stick, will they ever stop glorifying criminal conduct? The glorification of criminal behavior works against them—which I am sure we are delighted to see them take a big loss at any point.
Stay Blessed!
2024.05.16 10:25 Born_Software 20 bi guy from India- Looking for white and/or Latino/Hispanic guys (21+) from Europe or North America for intimate, close and non-platonic connections.[Please read post]
Hello hello! I'm a 20 year old bisexual guy from Kolkata (Calcutta), India (GMT+5:30) looking for, as mentioned in the title, close and intimate friends.
About me, I'm a full-time university student who's in his second year of undergraduate study. Well, this is just the beginning of my academic journey as I aspire to become a professor, the first in my family to hold a PhD. Physically, I'm 167 cm (5'6"), 65kg (130lbs) with light brown skin, medium brown eyes and very dark brown hair which reaches my shoulders. In bed, I'm a bottom. As for interests, I love reading and collecting books. Also, I like learning languages, currently taking B2 level French lessons at the Alliance française in my city. Apart from that, I enjoy visiting museums, galleries and libraries, followed by discovering various genres and music and podcasts (love the true crime genre) and watching films (Girl, Interrupted is an all-time favourite followed by Call Me By Your Name).
As to why I'm looking for close friends online, I've had very few opportunities to bond with men and also to explore myself. I find it difficult to get along with South Asian men, as I've grown up around them all my life and both the straight and queer ones have deep insecurities regarding their masculinity and sexuality, as well as an inflated sense of thinking highly of themselves. I would just like to change that, even if it's online. I just want companionship and intimacy, even if it's not face-to-face. I would like us to have no hesitations, limits or judgements between us. Just pure desire and affection existing simultaneously. I also suffer from clinical depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, have been on medication for the past 5 years and am going to therapy, but if that's not okay with you, I completely understand and do not blame you. I just want someone where we mutually care for each other out of actual genuineness. Also, I should put it out there, if our friendship turns into something potentially romantic, and we both feel the same way, I'd like to act on that.
So if all of this sounds good to you, don't hesitate to reach out, DMs are always open! I would be open to showing my own face and sharing my name if it is a mutual effort on both ends. Also, if we hit it off, I'd like to move to some other, more stable messaging app where we can chat, share pics and voice notes and eventually have voice and video calls.
Important, please note: I DO NOT use SNAPCHAT or SKYPE due to concerns regarding my privacy as well as security and encryption. Hope you do understand that. Looking forward to hearing from you very soon!
submitted by Born_Software to gaydating [link] [comments]
About me, I'm a full-time university student who's in his second year of undergraduate study. Well, this is just the beginning of my academic journey as I aspire to become a professor, the first in my family to hold a PhD. Physically, I'm 167 cm (5'6"), 65kg (130lbs) with light brown skin, medium brown eyes and very dark brown hair which reaches my shoulders. In bed, I'm a bottom. As for interests, I love reading and collecting books. Also, I like learning languages, currently taking B2 level French lessons at the Alliance française in my city. Apart from that, I enjoy visiting museums, galleries and libraries, followed by discovering various genres and music and podcasts (love the true crime genre) and watching films (Girl, Interrupted is an all-time favourite followed by Call Me By Your Name).
As to why I'm looking for close friends online, I've had very few opportunities to bond with men and also to explore myself. I find it difficult to get along with South Asian men, as I've grown up around them all my life and both the straight and queer ones have deep insecurities regarding their masculinity and sexuality, as well as an inflated sense of thinking highly of themselves. I would just like to change that, even if it's online. I just want companionship and intimacy, even if it's not face-to-face. I would like us to have no hesitations, limits or judgements between us. Just pure desire and affection existing simultaneously. I also suffer from clinical depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, have been on medication for the past 5 years and am going to therapy, but if that's not okay with you, I completely understand and do not blame you. I just want someone where we mutually care for each other out of actual genuineness. Also, I should put it out there, if our friendship turns into something potentially romantic, and we both feel the same way, I'd like to act on that.
So if all of this sounds good to you, don't hesitate to reach out, DMs are always open! I would be open to showing my own face and sharing my name if it is a mutual effort on both ends. Also, if we hit it off, I'd like to move to some other, more stable messaging app where we can chat, share pics and voice notes and eventually have voice and video calls.
Important, please note: I DO NOT use SNAPCHAT or SKYPE due to concerns regarding my privacy as well as security and encryption. Hope you do understand that. Looking forward to hearing from you very soon!
2024.05.16 10:23 Born_Software 20 bi guy from India- Looking for white and/or Latino/Hispanic guys (21+) from Europe or North America to be intimate and close friends with. [Please read post]
Hello hello! I'm a 20 year old bisexual guy from Kolkata (Calcutta), India (GMT+5:30) looking for, as mentioned in the title, close and intimate friends.
About me, I'm a full-time university student who's in his second year of undergraduate study. Well, this is just the beginning of my academic journey as I aspire to become a professor, the first in my family to hold a PhD. Physically, I'm 167 cm (5'6"), 65kg (130lbs) with light brown skin, medium brown eyes and very dark brown hair which reaches my shoulders. As for interests, I love reading and collecting books. Also, I like learning languages, currently taking B2 level French lessons at the Alliance française in my city. Apart from that, I enjoy visiting museums, galleries and libraries, followed by discovering various genres and music and podcasts (love the true crime genre) and watching films (Girl, Interrupted is an all-time favourite followed by Call Me By Your Name).
As to why I'm looking for close friends online, I've had very few opportunities to bond with men and also to explore myself. I find it difficult to get along with South Asian men, as I've grown up around them all my life and both the straight and queer ones have deep insecurities regarding their masculinity and sexuality, as well as an inflated sense of thinking highly of themselves. I would just like to change that, even if it's online. I just want companionship and intimacy, even if it's not face-to-face. I would like us to have no hesitations, limits or judgements between us. Just pure desire and affection existing simultaneously. I also suffer from clinical depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, have been on medication for the past 5 years and am going to therapy, but if that's not okay with you, I completely understand and do not blame you. I just want someone where we mutually care for each other out of actual genuineness. Also, I should put it out there, if our friendship turns into something potentially romantic, and we both feel the same way, I'd like to act on that.
So if all of this sounds good to you, don't hesitate to reach out, DMs are always open! I would be open to showing my own face and sharing my name if it is a mutual effort on both ends. Also, if we hit it off, I'd like to move to some other, more stable messaging app where we can chat, share pics and voice notes and eventually have voice and video calls.
Important, please note: I DO NOT use SNAPCHAT or SKYPE due to concerns regarding my privacy as well as security and encryption. Hope you do understand that. Looking forward to hearing from you very soon!
submitted by Born_Software to gayfriendfinder [link] [comments]
About me, I'm a full-time university student who's in his second year of undergraduate study. Well, this is just the beginning of my academic journey as I aspire to become a professor, the first in my family to hold a PhD. Physically, I'm 167 cm (5'6"), 65kg (130lbs) with light brown skin, medium brown eyes and very dark brown hair which reaches my shoulders. As for interests, I love reading and collecting books. Also, I like learning languages, currently taking B2 level French lessons at the Alliance française in my city. Apart from that, I enjoy visiting museums, galleries and libraries, followed by discovering various genres and music and podcasts (love the true crime genre) and watching films (Girl, Interrupted is an all-time favourite followed by Call Me By Your Name).
As to why I'm looking for close friends online, I've had very few opportunities to bond with men and also to explore myself. I find it difficult to get along with South Asian men, as I've grown up around them all my life and both the straight and queer ones have deep insecurities regarding their masculinity and sexuality, as well as an inflated sense of thinking highly of themselves. I would just like to change that, even if it's online. I just want companionship and intimacy, even if it's not face-to-face. I would like us to have no hesitations, limits or judgements between us. Just pure desire and affection existing simultaneously. I also suffer from clinical depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, have been on medication for the past 5 years and am going to therapy, but if that's not okay with you, I completely understand and do not blame you. I just want someone where we mutually care for each other out of actual genuineness. Also, I should put it out there, if our friendship turns into something potentially romantic, and we both feel the same way, I'd like to act on that.
So if all of this sounds good to you, don't hesitate to reach out, DMs are always open! I would be open to showing my own face and sharing my name if it is a mutual effort on both ends. Also, if we hit it off, I'd like to move to some other, more stable messaging app where we can chat, share pics and voice notes and eventually have voice and video calls.
Important, please note: I DO NOT use SNAPCHAT or SKYPE due to concerns regarding my privacy as well as security and encryption. Hope you do understand that. Looking forward to hearing from you very soon!
2024.05.16 10:18 Luceexx_ “Quit being so whiny and just go home before I make you wish you listened.”
 | CEO PSYCHO 2 Samuel Rivers⛧Degrade/Fear Kink. T/W for Potential Abuse, Noncon, and Dubcon⛧Samuel was a realllll catch.. totally. He was a fucking dick to put it blatantly, always so arrogant and nonchalant. He acted like he owned the world and there was nothing and no one that could touch him. Perhaps that’s why the two of you never really got along growing up, forced to be playmates due to both of your moms being best friends. Now, Samuel blames you for his mom making him employ you, giving you the glorious honor of being his secretary.. great. Let’s hope the two of you don’t step on each other’s toes— or lunge at each other’s throats— too much while working together. After all, the two of you barely started to tolerate each others presence. TOTALLY HARDCORE HORROR MUSIC |
2024.05.16 10:13 Tiny_Bug2742 The Nature of evil
In the bowels of the earth, there thrives a city unseen. Streets like veins run deep, each path a story carved from the very stone. Buildings stand, not reaching for the sky but in defiance of the abyss. Their walls a tapestry of lives lived in the shadows. Candlelight flickers, a silent testament to those who endure.
Stoneford's gaze sweeps the expanse. "This is Edîñbûrgh. Here power is the only law, the only truth. A place of ruins, of remnants." A commotion, a man beaten, unnoticed. Saburo's voice, a whisper in the dark. "Why does no one help?"
Stoneford watches, unmoved. "Commonplace, this violence. The dead lie as detritus, guts spilled upon the tracks. This is the den of the damned, a haven for the violent. Embrace the chaos or be consumed by it."
They continue walking, the dust floor, people with all kinds of ethnicity, religion, belief resides here. A large crowd have circled a pile of rocks, and there a man standing, The zealot doctrine is preaching something, but the crowd was against him throwing rock's calling him names.
"Nah, it's just one of those guys trying to preach there deform construct of fate." Stoneford said, Sigh's "Let's go, wait what are you? Hey! Where are you going!" Saburo didn't listen and Stoneford lost him to the crowd.
"Have they heard our cries?! The church doesn't deserve to hold such authority! They have poison our mind with there doctrine! For it's wall's are built by there lies!" One of the crowd shouted "How dare you speak against the tongues of men?!" The people agreed screaming at him. "Yeah!" "Blasphemy!" "Thy tongue speak the devil mischief!"
"Whom ever seek the truth! Come forward and I'll show you the true path into discovering the secrets of the world! Not like those who burn the scrolls have saw that great event!" He looks at Saburo's direction pointing at him. "You there, come forward my child, i saw horror's beyond what eyes can see." He extends his hands. "I show you the truth, the wanders of this world."
...
We raided a establishment, we take all them hostage, the building is filled with screams and terror, and one of them was a pregnant woman, with her child between 5-7 years old. "Please spare us! Just kill me and not my child! I'm begging you!" She kneels to us. "Hey! Saburo why are you doing there! Shoot them!" My hands are shaking, "CAN YOU HEAR ME?! SABURO!" My mind was in a blank space, a lead that pull both my arms between what's right and wrong. I don't know what to do then suddenly. "Give me that!" He pulls the gun to me shooting both of them, there body falls like a ragdoll. "What is that saburo?!" My eyes are shock.
I fell in love with violence and blood shedding, i started laughing, like a rabbid dog that have broken to a cage, i see my enemy's like none other than a cog. There blood spilling what fills my hunger for wrath, that each kill forms the image of my deceased mother, that her death will relinquish it. I mounted a camel along with my companions, we decimated the dessert of dawn
Musket shot, bodies falling to the heat of battle, his laugh is heard across the battlefield. That of a maniac. His dancing, and dancing he says he will never die, he painted himself with the blood of his enemies. "You gave us more trouble than the king of abyss!" At that day he earned the nickname "lion of the dessert." famously known as "The laughing clown of death."
"War is triggered by ones different form of belief, war was there before men, and that man loved it, children and old people love it too. But those who've fallen at the battle we're not remembered, that war is for the entertainment, that moral conduct doesn't apply for sharping sword or axes."
"As long the concept of life and death, many will fall, and one will stand to them all. "But they share one common thing, is that they protect what is right for them, for it's there way of life."
submitted by Tiny_Bug2742 to stories [link] [comments]
Stoneford's gaze sweeps the expanse. "This is Edîñbûrgh. Here power is the only law, the only truth. A place of ruins, of remnants." A commotion, a man beaten, unnoticed. Saburo's voice, a whisper in the dark. "Why does no one help?"
Stoneford watches, unmoved. "Commonplace, this violence. The dead lie as detritus, guts spilled upon the tracks. This is the den of the damned, a haven for the violent. Embrace the chaos or be consumed by it."
They continue walking, the dust floor, people with all kinds of ethnicity, religion, belief resides here. A large crowd have circled a pile of rocks, and there a man standing, The zealot doctrine is preaching something, but the crowd was against him throwing rock's calling him names.
"Nah, it's just one of those guys trying to preach there deform construct of fate." Stoneford said, Sigh's "Let's go, wait what are you? Hey! Where are you going!" Saburo didn't listen and Stoneford lost him to the crowd.
"Have they heard our cries?! The church doesn't deserve to hold such authority! They have poison our mind with there doctrine! For it's wall's are built by there lies!" One of the crowd shouted "How dare you speak against the tongues of men?!" The people agreed screaming at him. "Yeah!" "Blasphemy!" "Thy tongue speak the devil mischief!"
"Whom ever seek the truth! Come forward and I'll show you the true path into discovering the secrets of the world! Not like those who burn the scrolls have saw that great event!" He looks at Saburo's direction pointing at him. "You there, come forward my child, i saw horror's beyond what eyes can see." He extends his hands. "I show you the truth, the wanders of this world."
...
We raided a establishment, we take all them hostage, the building is filled with screams and terror, and one of them was a pregnant woman, with her child between 5-7 years old. "Please spare us! Just kill me and not my child! I'm begging you!" She kneels to us. "Hey! Saburo why are you doing there! Shoot them!" My hands are shaking, "CAN YOU HEAR ME?! SABURO!" My mind was in a blank space, a lead that pull both my arms between what's right and wrong. I don't know what to do then suddenly. "Give me that!" He pulls the gun to me shooting both of them, there body falls like a ragdoll. "What is that saburo?!" My eyes are shock.
I fell in love with violence and blood shedding, i started laughing, like a rabbid dog that have broken to a cage, i see my enemy's like none other than a cog. There blood spilling what fills my hunger for wrath, that each kill forms the image of my deceased mother, that her death will relinquish it. I mounted a camel along with my companions, we decimated the dessert of dawn
Musket shot, bodies falling to the heat of battle, his laugh is heard across the battlefield. That of a maniac. His dancing, and dancing he says he will never die, he painted himself with the blood of his enemies. "You gave us more trouble than the king of abyss!" At that day he earned the nickname "lion of the dessert." famously known as "The laughing clown of death."
"War is triggered by ones different form of belief, war was there before men, and that man loved it, children and old people love it too. But those who've fallen at the battle we're not remembered, that war is for the entertainment, that moral conduct doesn't apply for sharping sword or axes."
"As long the concept of life and death, many will fall, and one will stand to them all. "But they share one common thing, is that they protect what is right for them, for it's there way of life."
2024.05.16 10:07 Thin_Crazy_3685 SheraSeven notes
Someone here about a month ago asked for a summary or notes on Sheras teachings and I cant seem to find it anymore, so I will list here some of the things I have noted.
• Have a goal in mind
• Stay feminine
• Dont talk about your personal business, family/exes/private personal life heavy on the exes!
• if he tries to have sex immediately and he’s all sex sex sex just tell them ”Okay maybe this isn’t going to work out, but I have the perfect friend for you who likes your type. Her name is Alexa, I’ll send her number to you. She is soo free spirited” or just blatantly ask for money if he’s that rude.
• if he asks for your body count, ask about his bank account (only dusties ask this)
• He needs to like you more than you like him
• Spend his money
• Allow him to cheat, dont try to control any man
• All men are the same, their income isn’t
• Whatever comes out of a mans mouth, reverse it
• If you want him to love you, love yourself not him
• Men want what they cant have
• Emotions and fighting. Treat him like your boss in that sense, you dont get messy with your boss either.
• Emotions are better if you act them
• Laugh at his jokes
• Let him do the talking, and dont correct him. You want to make him feel good about himself around you.
• Tell them you dont have sex outside of relationships
• Exculisivity costs money, you’re not 3rd graders with post-it cards asking to be their girlfriend.
• If they say something you dont like give them an ugly look
• If he doesnt fix his issues within a week he’s a dusty. (E.g car breaks down etc.)
• ”I don’t deal with men who cant keep their word and are secretly broke”
• Dusties run away on their own if given a financial burden
• Always have a financial problem as a reason why you havent texted back or are unable to see them.
• Don’t be too available
• I look for what a man can do for me, offer me. I make him feel good, and elevate him
• When he makes time for you, you make time for him. And make sure that your time is being compensated, wheter it’s experience or material, or money
• Have several options
• It’s all about him stroke his ego
• You are the prize !!!!
• Ask him for help for free stuff first then he doesn’t have a problem with problems that cost
• Pay attention to details and make mental notes about him
• Dont sleep on the first date
• You cant change a dusty, a dusty will change themselves
• Be their weakness
• Say ”I’m very attracted to you” to ugly men
• Be emotionally reclusive
• Let him pick the place for the date but know in advance so you can ghost if it’s a cheap coffee shop
• Believe the red flags
• Talk slow and sensual
• Act like you dont need him at all
• Only being sexual, giving sex, talking about sex, initiating sex is being a pickmeisha. Use your other assets, such as voice, eyes, body language, humor, appearance
• If you want to be a pickmeisha, be one to a bank account
• Confidence and being the prize is in your mind, there is no tutorial for it
• Dont outshine him in gift giving
• If you’re talking and he’s not listening, ask ”Do you hear me? I want your opinion on this you’re so smart after all” you train him subconciously to listen and react to you while giving him a compliment
• Everytime you stress about a man, wheter he’s seeing other people etc. Reverse it. Why isn’t he stressed about you?
• You can be a pickmeisha to get their attention if you immediatly go back to yourself
• Dont carry the conversation
• Men tend to be seduced by looks, women by words. Be careful he’s not all talk, but actions too.
• When they give you the silent treatment, you act like they arent giving you the silent treatment because youre not talking to him anyway and that way it wont work on you
• ”Oh baby yeah I cant wait it’s just going to be so great, but I have to get to know you a little better first. It makes it more passionate for me, and I know you want to please me, right? I cant just sleep with anybody I barely know, it’s not exciting for me.”
• He should have more than 1 income
• Date dusties and for fun when young, start dating for funds at 23
• If he tries to come back, have a list of things you want and make him complete all of them.
• Play dumb
• If you playing the game correctly you shouldn’t be worried about commitment
• ”How you doing?” ”Oh I was doing bad but now that you called I’m feeling much better”
• Being unbothered holds actual power
• If a man ghosts you or has other options you dont care
• Dont approach men, but you can always pass them the ball
•In order to take things slow with a man you need to have high values
• My brain doesnt understand less
• ”It’s been a while since I met a handsome succesful man that’s not afraid to impress a woman”
submitted by Thin_Crazy_3685 to SheraSeven [link] [comments]
• Have a goal in mind
• Stay feminine
• Dont talk about your personal business, family/exes/private personal life heavy on the exes!
• if he tries to have sex immediately and he’s all sex sex sex just tell them ”Okay maybe this isn’t going to work out, but I have the perfect friend for you who likes your type. Her name is Alexa, I’ll send her number to you. She is soo free spirited” or just blatantly ask for money if he’s that rude.
• if he asks for your body count, ask about his bank account (only dusties ask this)
• He needs to like you more than you like him
• Spend his money
• Allow him to cheat, dont try to control any man
• All men are the same, their income isn’t
• Whatever comes out of a mans mouth, reverse it
• If you want him to love you, love yourself not him
• Men want what they cant have
• Emotions and fighting. Treat him like your boss in that sense, you dont get messy with your boss either.
• Emotions are better if you act them
• Laugh at his jokes
• Let him do the talking, and dont correct him. You want to make him feel good about himself around you.
• Tell them you dont have sex outside of relationships
• Exculisivity costs money, you’re not 3rd graders with post-it cards asking to be their girlfriend.
• If they say something you dont like give them an ugly look
• If he doesnt fix his issues within a week he’s a dusty. (E.g car breaks down etc.)
• ”I don’t deal with men who cant keep their word and are secretly broke”
• Dusties run away on their own if given a financial burden
• Always have a financial problem as a reason why you havent texted back or are unable to see them.
• Don’t be too available
• I look for what a man can do for me, offer me. I make him feel good, and elevate him
• When he makes time for you, you make time for him. And make sure that your time is being compensated, wheter it’s experience or material, or money
• Have several options
• It’s all about him stroke his ego
• You are the prize !!!!
• Ask him for help for free stuff first then he doesn’t have a problem with problems that cost
• Pay attention to details and make mental notes about him
• Dont sleep on the first date
• You cant change a dusty, a dusty will change themselves
• Be their weakness
• Say ”I’m very attracted to you” to ugly men
• Be emotionally reclusive
• Let him pick the place for the date but know in advance so you can ghost if it’s a cheap coffee shop
• Believe the red flags
• Talk slow and sensual
• Act like you dont need him at all
• Only being sexual, giving sex, talking about sex, initiating sex is being a pickmeisha. Use your other assets, such as voice, eyes, body language, humor, appearance
• If you want to be a pickmeisha, be one to a bank account
• Confidence and being the prize is in your mind, there is no tutorial for it
• Dont outshine him in gift giving
• If you’re talking and he’s not listening, ask ”Do you hear me? I want your opinion on this you’re so smart after all” you train him subconciously to listen and react to you while giving him a compliment
• Everytime you stress about a man, wheter he’s seeing other people etc. Reverse it. Why isn’t he stressed about you?
• You can be a pickmeisha to get their attention if you immediatly go back to yourself
• Dont carry the conversation
• Men tend to be seduced by looks, women by words. Be careful he’s not all talk, but actions too.
• When they give you the silent treatment, you act like they arent giving you the silent treatment because youre not talking to him anyway and that way it wont work on you
• ”Oh baby yeah I cant wait it’s just going to be so great, but I have to get to know you a little better first. It makes it more passionate for me, and I know you want to please me, right? I cant just sleep with anybody I barely know, it’s not exciting for me.”
• He should have more than 1 income
• Date dusties and for fun when young, start dating for funds at 23
• If he tries to come back, have a list of things you want and make him complete all of them.
• Play dumb
• If you playing the game correctly you shouldn’t be worried about commitment
• ”How you doing?” ”Oh I was doing bad but now that you called I’m feeling much better”
• Being unbothered holds actual power
• If a man ghosts you or has other options you dont care
• Dont approach men, but you can always pass them the ball
•In order to take things slow with a man you need to have high values
• My brain doesnt understand less
• ”It’s been a while since I met a handsome succesful man that’s not afraid to impress a woman”
2024.05.16 10:06 Actual_Bookkeeper699 Asking this for me and all the masked men lover girls
Yall clinxque had another channel only dedicated to bf subliminals and things like that and they had masked men as thumbnail , anyone know the url of that channel? Cause i forgot the name of it and cant find it.
Also anyone know any subliminal for military men (dont judge me your girl is in her "simp for masked military men" phase lmaoooo)
submitted by Actual_Bookkeeper699 to Subliminal [link] [comments]
Also anyone know any subliminal for military men (dont judge me your girl is in her "simp for masked military men" phase lmaoooo)
2024.05.16 10:05 Existing-Area-9093 Baradwaj Rangan's interview of Iraivi (lengthy, with spoilers)
Spoilers ahead…
Dear Karthik Subbaraj,
Congratulations on yet another interesting movie, and for resisting the impulse to name this one, too, after a food item. Iraivi is an unusual feminist film, in the sense that it’s seen entirely through the prism of sympathetic male characters. Your men aren’t monsters who drink or cheat on their wives or subject them to torture. They do these things, yes, but… differently. Arul (SJ Surya) drinks, but only to drown out his sense of failure – he’s a director and his film is in the cans, being held hostage by a sadistic producer. Michael (Vijay Sethupathi) has sex with Malarvizhi (Pooja Devariya), and he continues to lust after her after his marriage to Ponni (Anjali) – I love that all your women have names that suggest classical heroines, including Arul’s wife Yazhini (Kamalini Mukherjee) – but it’s a marriage he committed to in a hurry and he still hasn’t reconciled himself to it. He’s being a bastard, certainly, but he’s not a one-note villain. And the torture they inflict isn’t the stubbing-a-cigarette-into-the-wife’s-bare-arm variety. It’s more mental than physical.
So we get women who are collateral damage – and I include Arul’s comatose mother (Vadivukkarasi), and the nurse who’s not allowed to do her duty – of men being men. They’re being babies, really. Yazhini tells Arul that he should get on with his life, write another story, make another movie. He says it’s like her trying to have another child while still pregnant with their daughter. (Yes, all these men end up with girl children.) He’s a wallower – but maybe all artists are. You like to do that, don’t you Karthik? Even in a film like this, you deliver a commentary about filmmaking and the artist. Why, even Arul’s father is a sculptor, and though we never see him ill-treating his wife (thank you for sparing us the clichés of raised hands and raised voices), we’re informed that he’s responsible for her state. His son’s following the father’s footsteps. Maybe you’re trying to say that the wives of obsessed artists are doomed to become collateral damage. Your films make us think, Karthik, so thank you for that.
All your stories have at their centre a filmmaker, or at least (in the case of your first film, Pizza) a storyteller. And through them, we seem to hear your voice. “Works of art should not be in places where they are not respected.” “Namma padam pesanum, naama pesa koodadhu.” You compare masala movies to a massage with a happy ending. (I laughed, but please don’t judge me when I say I rather like massages with happy endings – I refer to masala movies, of course.) We even get a line of dialogue about Dolby Atmos. (What will the B/C-centre audience make of this, Karthik? But then you don’t really give a shit, do you? More power to you.) And you like your insider jokes. That crass, egoistic producer who does not care about art – he reminded me of the crass producer from your earlier film, Jigarthanda. You like Rajinikanth too. You referenced Thillu Mullu in Pizza, Thalapathi in Jigarthanda, and now you have Arul singing Malayala karayoram, Michael singing Oorai therinjikitten.
Or is that more of an Ilayaraja homage? You like to keep the audience guessing, right? When the Bobby Simha character in Jigarthanda said he was a Shankar-Ganesh fan, it appeared that you were mocking the endless Ilayaraja nods in Tamil cinema, but here you are, doffing your hat to the maestro. “Raja Raja dhaan.” Arul says this… twice. (By the way, which is that nightclub which plays Maanguyile poonguyile? Do let us know.) And the reuse of Unnai thaane – first in a scene between Michael and Malarvizhi; later in a scene between Michael and Ponni – is the kind of Easter egg we come to your films for. Let me list some others, though I’ll probably need to watch the film a second (or third) time to get them all. The name of the bachelors’ quarters is Ambal Mansion – it goes with your theme and title. I didn’t get the bit about the windmills (something connected to the gust of wind that makes the row of cycles fall over in the first scene?), or why you showcased the book of Shanta Shishunala Sharif’s poems. (I confess. I Googled up that name. I can’t remember the last time a Tamil film made me Google something up. Madras, maybe.) And despite your note at the beginning that Iraivi is inspired by the works of K Balachander (he made female-centric films, but I don’t know if I’d call them feminist films), this is really more of an ode to Mani Ratnam, isn’t it? Specifically, Aayidha Ezhuthu. The three men, one of them – the impulsive one – named Michael. The film starting out as Arul’s story, then becoming Michael’s story, and finally Jagan’s (Bobby Simha) story. The finale with the woman on the train. Plus, the arc of the Madhavan-Meera Jasmine plot was essentially about being easily misled (in the case of the man) and becoming collateral damage (in the case of the woman.) And yes, the rain. All that rain. As though the skies were weeping for these women.
Am I digressing, Karthik? If I am, I’m just following your style, which is the opposite of simple and linear. As a result, I find your films longer than they need to be. (You may feel the same about my reviews.) For instance, I did not care for the scene in the nightclub where a director is felicitated. I realise it was there as a last straw for Yazhini, but it felt redundant. But I suppose they couldn’t be any other way, because you like these shaggy-dog stories that you then embellish with novelistic detail. I love the way you introduce your characters, the time you take with them. Our films lay out characters and their relationship to each other the minute we set eyes on them, but you make us wait to know how Arul is related to Jagan and where Michael fits in and so on. And when it appeared that a semblance of a plot was kicking in (something about Arul needing money to buy back his film), I dug out my phone and checked: it was a whole hour into the movie. Borrowing an image from Malarvizhi’s profession (oh wait, she’s an artist too; she’s literally an artist), it’s like daubs of paint slowly forming a bigger picture.
And you really like an expansive canvas. Not only does the crass producer have a brother, you also bring in his wife later on, to conclude a deal he began making. These segments practically form a mini-movie, with another woman left reeling by the actions of her man. Your films have this… density. They’re packed – with characters, with complications, with information doled out in bits and pieces. (A character says, “Un kitta onnu sollanum.” And instead of hearing what he has to say, we cut to someone else.) Take the scene where Michael asks Arul for money he is owed. You just need to get Michael to Arul’s antiques shop, so the next part of the plot can be staged. Arul could have told Michael to collect the money at the shop. Instead, this is what we get. Arul tells Michael to wait for a week, when he can get the 50 lakhs he is owed. Michael says he wants only 10 lakhs. Arul says he has only 8 lakhs, he’ll give the remainder later. Michael goes to Arul’s father, in the hospital. He has only 5 lakhs. And he directs Michael to the shop, to get the remaining 3 lakhs. Your signature intercutting adds to this texture, Karthik. Shots of Michael and Arul’s father in the hospital are intercut with shots of Arul hunting for booze. Shots of Michael and Jagan outside a courtroom are intercut with shots of Arul being consoled by his father. Happenings are stretched and meshed the way they would be in real life, and not compacted according to the page-per-minute requirement of screenplay-writing textbooks.
I could never predict where the film was going (win!), what these people were going to do (again, win!) –though I must admit I found this to be the weakest of your “twists.” The subplot about stealing sculptures, too, I found rather conceit-y, something half-heartedly cooked up to fit with the title and the theme, rather than something plausible, something these people would do. When Michael, here, commits murder, with a hammer, I went, “This mild-mannered chap? Really?” But then, even in Jigarthanda, I wasn’t quite convinced that the characters would do the things they did. They seemed to be puppets of a screenplay rather than credible human beings, whose actions evolve organically from who they are (or at least, who they seem to be).
But even if I am not convinced by the overall trajectory of your characters, I love how fleshed-out they are on a moment-to-moment basis. I loved the scene where Arul barges into Yazhini’s house, after their separation, on the day of her engagement to someone else. In a lesser film, she would have asked him to get out, and he’d have dug his heels in, and she’d have cooled down and… But here, she rushes straight into his arms. And you make us see why. She was frustrated, fed up with him. But she’s also confused. Was she hasty in abandoning this man? Should she move on with another man? Does she even need a man? With just this one scene, you’ve compensated for the underwritten heroine of Jigarthanda. The story arc may be Arul’s, but Yazhini registers as a fully formed character. Similarly, Michael’s arc allows for the delineation of Ponni and Malarvizhi, and through Jagan, we get glimpses of his mother, and possibly of all womanhood as viewed by a compassionate man. And then you say that women don’t need even this compassionate man (poor chap!), that they have to emancipate themselves instead of looking for a penis-wielding emancipator. What delicious irony, given that you begin the film with women talking about marriage, tying themselves to a man!
Or not, in the case of Malarvizhi, who is easily the film’s most interesting character. Her husband is dead, and she doesn’t want love anymore – only sex. When Michael buys her a diamond necklace, she gives it back to him – she can buy her own trinkets, thank you very much. But the character feels shoe-horned into the film, Karthik. I felt betrayed – and I bet she did too – that after a point, she was used simply as a plot device to get Michael and Ponni together, and also to illustrate Michael’s (who is now standing in for all of mankind) hypocrisy. I felt she deserved more. And yet, I appreciated your generosity in fleshing her out like all the others, without judging her. She gets to be the rare woman in Tamil cinema who dumps the man, and the way she lets go of Michael is echoed in the way Arul lets go of Yazhini, with a heavy heart and some playacting. A side effect of the Malarvizhi subplot is the reassurance that Vijay Sethupathi is still interested in making cinema, rather than just massy entertainers targeted at the box office.
Ponni gets a better deal (and Anjali is terrific, raw and expressive in a way she has never been). In a great scene – rather, a set of book-ending scenes – Michael tells Ponni that he was forced to marry her, and she’s going to have to “adjust” to this if she wants to be with him. Much later, she throws the “adjust” word back on his bearded face when he asks her if she slept with someone else. In a different kind of movie, we’d be invited to see this symmetry, stand up and applaud. But you’re too subtle for that, Karthik. Iraivi is your subtlest film. Which is why I winced at the melodramatic lines about men and women, most of which came towards the end. Aan, using the long-sounding vowel, versus penn, with the shorter one – for such a visual filmmaker (this is another outstandingly shot film, less showy than Jigarthanda and probably richer for that), do you really need the crutch of linguistic special effects from another era of filmmaking? Also, when the rest of your film is so allusive, isn’t there another way you can explain the twist without having a character resort to such an inelegant information dump?
And why is it that your films come together more in the head than in the heart? Why are they easier to admire than love wholeheartedly? I used to think it was because your characters are essentially deceitful, self-serving and unsympathetic, so though we were invested in what they did, we didn’t really warm up to them. But here, you have Ponni and Yazhini and Malarvizhi – and they’re still remote. But perhaps this is bound to happen when there are so many people, so many strands, when we don’t follow one person’s simplistic “you go, girl” journey like we do in, say, 36 Vayadhinile? But when the parts are so well-crafted, we don’t complain as much about their sum not adding up to a satisfying whole. I am sure that you will, one day, make that wholly satisfying film, but for now, thank you for these parts. Thank you for the ambition. I felt there were too many songs (some good work by Santhosh Narayanan), but thank you for ensuring that they don’t break character, the way songs usually do when a character speaking in his or her voice suddenly segues into the playback singer’s voice. Thank you for giving us SJ Surya, the actor – I never dreamed he had such a capacity to hold a scene, to hold the screen. Thank you for continuing not to sell out. Thank you for trying to do so much, even if not all of it needed to have been tried. And thank you for making me fight with myself, for not making it easy to decide if you’ve made a “good” film or a merely “okay” film. For now, Iraivi is a fascinating film, and that’s enough.
Sincerely, etc.
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Dear Karthik Subbaraj,
Congratulations on yet another interesting movie, and for resisting the impulse to name this one, too, after a food item. Iraivi is an unusual feminist film, in the sense that it’s seen entirely through the prism of sympathetic male characters. Your men aren’t monsters who drink or cheat on their wives or subject them to torture. They do these things, yes, but… differently. Arul (SJ Surya) drinks, but only to drown out his sense of failure – he’s a director and his film is in the cans, being held hostage by a sadistic producer. Michael (Vijay Sethupathi) has sex with Malarvizhi (Pooja Devariya), and he continues to lust after her after his marriage to Ponni (Anjali) – I love that all your women have names that suggest classical heroines, including Arul’s wife Yazhini (Kamalini Mukherjee) – but it’s a marriage he committed to in a hurry and he still hasn’t reconciled himself to it. He’s being a bastard, certainly, but he’s not a one-note villain. And the torture they inflict isn’t the stubbing-a-cigarette-into-the-wife’s-bare-arm variety. It’s more mental than physical.
So we get women who are collateral damage – and I include Arul’s comatose mother (Vadivukkarasi), and the nurse who’s not allowed to do her duty – of men being men. They’re being babies, really. Yazhini tells Arul that he should get on with his life, write another story, make another movie. He says it’s like her trying to have another child while still pregnant with their daughter. (Yes, all these men end up with girl children.) He’s a wallower – but maybe all artists are. You like to do that, don’t you Karthik? Even in a film like this, you deliver a commentary about filmmaking and the artist. Why, even Arul’s father is a sculptor, and though we never see him ill-treating his wife (thank you for sparing us the clichés of raised hands and raised voices), we’re informed that he’s responsible for her state. His son’s following the father’s footsteps. Maybe you’re trying to say that the wives of obsessed artists are doomed to become collateral damage. Your films make us think, Karthik, so thank you for that.
All your stories have at their centre a filmmaker, or at least (in the case of your first film, Pizza) a storyteller. And through them, we seem to hear your voice. “Works of art should not be in places where they are not respected.” “Namma padam pesanum, naama pesa koodadhu.” You compare masala movies to a massage with a happy ending. (I laughed, but please don’t judge me when I say I rather like massages with happy endings – I refer to masala movies, of course.) We even get a line of dialogue about Dolby Atmos. (What will the B/C-centre audience make of this, Karthik? But then you don’t really give a shit, do you? More power to you.) And you like your insider jokes. That crass, egoistic producer who does not care about art – he reminded me of the crass producer from your earlier film, Jigarthanda. You like Rajinikanth too. You referenced Thillu Mullu in Pizza, Thalapathi in Jigarthanda, and now you have Arul singing Malayala karayoram, Michael singing Oorai therinjikitten.
Or is that more of an Ilayaraja homage? You like to keep the audience guessing, right? When the Bobby Simha character in Jigarthanda said he was a Shankar-Ganesh fan, it appeared that you were mocking the endless Ilayaraja nods in Tamil cinema, but here you are, doffing your hat to the maestro. “Raja Raja dhaan.” Arul says this… twice. (By the way, which is that nightclub which plays Maanguyile poonguyile? Do let us know.) And the reuse of Unnai thaane – first in a scene between Michael and Malarvizhi; later in a scene between Michael and Ponni – is the kind of Easter egg we come to your films for. Let me list some others, though I’ll probably need to watch the film a second (or third) time to get them all. The name of the bachelors’ quarters is Ambal Mansion – it goes with your theme and title. I didn’t get the bit about the windmills (something connected to the gust of wind that makes the row of cycles fall over in the first scene?), or why you showcased the book of Shanta Shishunala Sharif’s poems. (I confess. I Googled up that name. I can’t remember the last time a Tamil film made me Google something up. Madras, maybe.) And despite your note at the beginning that Iraivi is inspired by the works of K Balachander (he made female-centric films, but I don’t know if I’d call them feminist films), this is really more of an ode to Mani Ratnam, isn’t it? Specifically, Aayidha Ezhuthu. The three men, one of them – the impulsive one – named Michael. The film starting out as Arul’s story, then becoming Michael’s story, and finally Jagan’s (Bobby Simha) story. The finale with the woman on the train. Plus, the arc of the Madhavan-Meera Jasmine plot was essentially about being easily misled (in the case of the man) and becoming collateral damage (in the case of the woman.) And yes, the rain. All that rain. As though the skies were weeping for these women.
Am I digressing, Karthik? If I am, I’m just following your style, which is the opposite of simple and linear. As a result, I find your films longer than they need to be. (You may feel the same about my reviews.) For instance, I did not care for the scene in the nightclub where a director is felicitated. I realise it was there as a last straw for Yazhini, but it felt redundant. But I suppose they couldn’t be any other way, because you like these shaggy-dog stories that you then embellish with novelistic detail. I love the way you introduce your characters, the time you take with them. Our films lay out characters and their relationship to each other the minute we set eyes on them, but you make us wait to know how Arul is related to Jagan and where Michael fits in and so on. And when it appeared that a semblance of a plot was kicking in (something about Arul needing money to buy back his film), I dug out my phone and checked: it was a whole hour into the movie. Borrowing an image from Malarvizhi’s profession (oh wait, she’s an artist too; she’s literally an artist), it’s like daubs of paint slowly forming a bigger picture.
And you really like an expansive canvas. Not only does the crass producer have a brother, you also bring in his wife later on, to conclude a deal he began making. These segments practically form a mini-movie, with another woman left reeling by the actions of her man. Your films have this… density. They’re packed – with characters, with complications, with information doled out in bits and pieces. (A character says, “Un kitta onnu sollanum.” And instead of hearing what he has to say, we cut to someone else.) Take the scene where Michael asks Arul for money he is owed. You just need to get Michael to Arul’s antiques shop, so the next part of the plot can be staged. Arul could have told Michael to collect the money at the shop. Instead, this is what we get. Arul tells Michael to wait for a week, when he can get the 50 lakhs he is owed. Michael says he wants only 10 lakhs. Arul says he has only 8 lakhs, he’ll give the remainder later. Michael goes to Arul’s father, in the hospital. He has only 5 lakhs. And he directs Michael to the shop, to get the remaining 3 lakhs. Your signature intercutting adds to this texture, Karthik. Shots of Michael and Arul’s father in the hospital are intercut with shots of Arul hunting for booze. Shots of Michael and Jagan outside a courtroom are intercut with shots of Arul being consoled by his father. Happenings are stretched and meshed the way they would be in real life, and not compacted according to the page-per-minute requirement of screenplay-writing textbooks.
I could never predict where the film was going (win!), what these people were going to do (again, win!) –though I must admit I found this to be the weakest of your “twists.” The subplot about stealing sculptures, too, I found rather conceit-y, something half-heartedly cooked up to fit with the title and the theme, rather than something plausible, something these people would do. When Michael, here, commits murder, with a hammer, I went, “This mild-mannered chap? Really?” But then, even in Jigarthanda, I wasn’t quite convinced that the characters would do the things they did. They seemed to be puppets of a screenplay rather than credible human beings, whose actions evolve organically from who they are (or at least, who they seem to be).
But even if I am not convinced by the overall trajectory of your characters, I love how fleshed-out they are on a moment-to-moment basis. I loved the scene where Arul barges into Yazhini’s house, after their separation, on the day of her engagement to someone else. In a lesser film, she would have asked him to get out, and he’d have dug his heels in, and she’d have cooled down and… But here, she rushes straight into his arms. And you make us see why. She was frustrated, fed up with him. But she’s also confused. Was she hasty in abandoning this man? Should she move on with another man? Does she even need a man? With just this one scene, you’ve compensated for the underwritten heroine of Jigarthanda. The story arc may be Arul’s, but Yazhini registers as a fully formed character. Similarly, Michael’s arc allows for the delineation of Ponni and Malarvizhi, and through Jagan, we get glimpses of his mother, and possibly of all womanhood as viewed by a compassionate man. And then you say that women don’t need even this compassionate man (poor chap!), that they have to emancipate themselves instead of looking for a penis-wielding emancipator. What delicious irony, given that you begin the film with women talking about marriage, tying themselves to a man!
Or not, in the case of Malarvizhi, who is easily the film’s most interesting character. Her husband is dead, and she doesn’t want love anymore – only sex. When Michael buys her a diamond necklace, she gives it back to him – she can buy her own trinkets, thank you very much. But the character feels shoe-horned into the film, Karthik. I felt betrayed – and I bet she did too – that after a point, she was used simply as a plot device to get Michael and Ponni together, and also to illustrate Michael’s (who is now standing in for all of mankind) hypocrisy. I felt she deserved more. And yet, I appreciated your generosity in fleshing her out like all the others, without judging her. She gets to be the rare woman in Tamil cinema who dumps the man, and the way she lets go of Michael is echoed in the way Arul lets go of Yazhini, with a heavy heart and some playacting. A side effect of the Malarvizhi subplot is the reassurance that Vijay Sethupathi is still interested in making cinema, rather than just massy entertainers targeted at the box office.
Ponni gets a better deal (and Anjali is terrific, raw and expressive in a way she has never been). In a great scene – rather, a set of book-ending scenes – Michael tells Ponni that he was forced to marry her, and she’s going to have to “adjust” to this if she wants to be with him. Much later, she throws the “adjust” word back on his bearded face when he asks her if she slept with someone else. In a different kind of movie, we’d be invited to see this symmetry, stand up and applaud. But you’re too subtle for that, Karthik. Iraivi is your subtlest film. Which is why I winced at the melodramatic lines about men and women, most of which came towards the end. Aan, using the long-sounding vowel, versus penn, with the shorter one – for such a visual filmmaker (this is another outstandingly shot film, less showy than Jigarthanda and probably richer for that), do you really need the crutch of linguistic special effects from another era of filmmaking? Also, when the rest of your film is so allusive, isn’t there another way you can explain the twist without having a character resort to such an inelegant information dump?
And why is it that your films come together more in the head than in the heart? Why are they easier to admire than love wholeheartedly? I used to think it was because your characters are essentially deceitful, self-serving and unsympathetic, so though we were invested in what they did, we didn’t really warm up to them. But here, you have Ponni and Yazhini and Malarvizhi – and they’re still remote. But perhaps this is bound to happen when there are so many people, so many strands, when we don’t follow one person’s simplistic “you go, girl” journey like we do in, say, 36 Vayadhinile? But when the parts are so well-crafted, we don’t complain as much about their sum not adding up to a satisfying whole. I am sure that you will, one day, make that wholly satisfying film, but for now, thank you for these parts. Thank you for the ambition. I felt there were too many songs (some good work by Santhosh Narayanan), but thank you for ensuring that they don’t break character, the way songs usually do when a character speaking in his or her voice suddenly segues into the playback singer’s voice. Thank you for giving us SJ Surya, the actor – I never dreamed he had such a capacity to hold a scene, to hold the screen. Thank you for continuing not to sell out. Thank you for trying to do so much, even if not all of it needed to have been tried. And thank you for making me fight with myself, for not making it easy to decide if you’ve made a “good” film or a merely “okay” film. For now, Iraivi is a fascinating film, and that’s enough.
Sincerely, etc.
2024.05.16 09:59 Defiant_Buy_101 The diagnosis delemia: behind the multi million dollar industry of healthcare monitoring
Chapter 1: the event
It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
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As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.
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It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.
- Evaluator: Have you ever stoped drinking in the last year.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”
- Evaluator Have you ever had withdrawal symptoms
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago
- Evaluator: Have you even taken your sleeping medication on a day or night which you drank? Me: Yes, I took my prescriptions are prescribed but I never drank close to bed
- Evaluator Has anyone told you you drink to much or been worried about you Me: No I drink much less than my friends
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.
- Evaluator : you have sleep issues I hear, and your chart says you’ve had depression in the past, don’t you know that alcohol can effect your sleep and mood Me: yes that’s why I never drink within 3 hours of sleep.
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)
- • Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended
- Tolerance drinking more to require the same effect: this he checked as true in his final note however it was never even discussed in our evaluation. I did mention to him that I’ve been drinking more than I had earlier in the year frequency wise, but they said nothing to do with quantity or needing more.
- Wanting to drink so bad you can not think of anything else: this is the only qualification of SAUD my evaluator said I did not have.
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
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As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.
- The programs have overstepped their intended jurisdiction. -these programs work well if they function how they were intended at their inception. Cite original purpose. Originally these programs were designed to protect physicians and civilians from impaired practitioners; being healthcare workers who were impaired at work. Over the years, these organizations have extended their authority to encompass individuals with substance use disorders When not at work and also those who are in training to become healthcare professionals. Take for example myself compared to a physician who is impaired at work. A doctor who arrived for duty under the influence would surely benifit from the extensive testing, therapy and accountability enforced via these programs. In accordance the 20,000$ per year cost is appropriate when only making up roughly 7% of their yearly salary vs nearly half of a residents. In my case with my loss of income from employment, coast of treatment and monitoring, this year I will be required to pay 20,000$ to work. Yes, I will be losing money to work. Even if did indeed have a substance use disorder this level of monitoring wouldn’t not be considered appropriate.
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.
- You ask to be released early done at 1/2 time ( good luck)
- You have “good reason” (no one has ever been let out of contract because of this reason, the verbiage is far too vague)
- You serve all your time and they let you out(maybe, as discussed earlier, they would do everything they can to keep you in your contract as long as your practicing)
- You can’t practice medicine anymore
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.
2024.05.16 09:57 No-Storm-8920 My ex keeps trying to take our kid away from me, but I can stop him using something his father’s coma
WIBTAH to use the coma of my ex’s father in the custody battle
Hi! This story will require quite a bit of context (that can be found here https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/s/2Vo9S0QKF1). I need to both vent and find some advice, so any input is appreciated. Long story short, my (F26) ex Fitz (M 32) keeps finding reasons to sue me to get full custody of our son Tim (M5). He sued several times in the past, but now everything went too far.
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
I don’t know what I should do or how I should protect Tim at this point as I believe he should have a father and he and Fitz are really close, but at the same time, Fitz does hurt Tim a lot these days.
submitted by No-Storm-8920 to self [link] [comments]
Hi! This story will require quite a bit of context (that can be found here https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/s/2Vo9S0QKF1). I need to both vent and find some advice, so any input is appreciated. Long story short, my (F26) ex Fitz (M 32) keeps finding reasons to sue me to get full custody of our son Tim (M5). He sued several times in the past, but now everything went too far.
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
I don’t know what I should do or how I should protect Tim at this point as I believe he should have a father and he and Fitz are really close, but at the same time, Fitz does hurt Tim a lot these days.
2024.05.16 09:50 AutoModerator IF YOUR NAME IS JONATHAN, YOU SHOULD SPEND YOUR MONDAYS DOING THIS
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2024.05.16 09:50 No-Storm-8920 My ex is trying to take our kid away from me, but I can stop it all if I use his father’s coma against him.
Hi! This story will require quite a bit of context (that can be found here https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/s/2Vo9S0QKF1). Long story short, my (F26) ex Fitz (M 32) keeps finding reasons to sue me to get full custody of our son Tim (M5). He sued several times in the past, but now everything went too far.
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
What should I do? Any advice on the matter will be highly appreciated!
submitted by No-Storm-8920 to Advice [link] [comments]
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
What should I do? Any advice on the matter will be highly appreciated!
2024.05.16 09:49 Sweet-Ship-5412 Did I coerce her into more kissing and dancing on New Years 2024? LONG READ.
On New Years Day, 2024, after the balloon drop in a nightclub, I saw a hot girl with her hot friends dancing and grinding on men and each other. The girls shared kisses with each other, too. I wanted one of Jane’s (fake name for privacy) hot friends, but after dancing with her for a minute, I pivoted to Jane. She was giving me bedroom eyes and after we danced for a minute, she gave me a giddy smirk, closed her eyes, grabbed me and made out with me. Her lips tasted like alcohol, literally. I was in shock she was kissing me and I eventually kissed back. After a couple hot seconds, Jane pulled back and said I was hot. I am nervous as this was my first kiss since like middle school (I know, I know). We dance and kiss more. All of a sudden I felt panic because again, I tasted alcohol on her lips. “Is she drunk?” - I thought to myself. She was talking pretty normally with ditzy flourishes here and there. She wasn’t stumbling or anything (I actually saw her friends and her enter and leave the vicinity so many times before I pursued her friend. They were very lively and entered dancing every time).
Anyways...after Jane and I tongue kissed on the dance floor while embracing, I pulled back and asked Jane how many fingers I was holding. I remember out of like 4 or 5 times I did the finger test consecutively in that moment, she got 1 wrong. I corrected her. I told her I didn’t want to take advantage of her and she told me that she wasn’t drunk, just “lit”. Jane then put her hand on my shoulder and thanked me for keeping her safe. I then told her that I wanted to make sure she was in control and she was safe (earlier that night, I helped a clearly drunk girl who fell into me find her friend (I did the fingers test on her and she did NOT respond, just glassy eyed, drunk stare and stoically shitfaced) so I already had safety at the forefront of the mind even more from that point). Jane’s response was that she was in control.
We then went to the patio and sat down. She then called me cute in a ditzy way with her giddy smile. We introduced ourselves and actually had a nice conversation. She then proceeded to say she wanted to have sex with me and if I was top or bottom. I told her that I wasn’t interested in sex with her (I was paranoid about STD’s since a relative of mine is a doctor, so I told her that if we were to do it in the future (not that night or the day after due to just being there for vibes, settling into the new year right, New Year’s Day streets were gonna be chaotic with drunk drivers and wild attitudes, I also didn’t bring protection), then I needed paperwork of when she last got tested after sex.
We got each other’s IG’s and planned Tuesday for us to hang out and have sex. Obviously it didn’t work out because my scaredy cat self didn’t create enough comfort and connection compared to attraction in the club. So she saw me as another cute guy who she made out with to 000’s crunk. Jane told her hot friends that I was a good guy and that I was looking out for them.
After we grinded with her friend, Jane and I shared more make out sessions (after she said I was hot and that she loved me) She then told me to tie her up and do naughty things to her. I just laughed and we danced and kissed the night away. The day after, her texts were very favorable and full of encouragement and positivity (we were talking about self improvement). We still follow each other on IG but ceased contact for now. Guess the emotions wore off. It’s all good.
I couldn’t help but make this post because I have generalized anxiety, sensory integration disorder, and non verbal learning disorder. I’m currently getting screened for autism at my regional center. Am I overthinking this whole event and thinking that I coerced her into kissing and shit (when she couldn’t get one of the finger holding rounds right)? I had a serious nervous breakdown over it in March. I deal with a lot of toxic shame and guilt but I don’t know what’s real and what’s not when it comes to truth or narratives that I create for myself. Whether they are healthy or not, am I ducking my ego? I don’t know please help!
submitted by Sweet-Ship-5412 to AITAH [link] [comments]
Anyways...after Jane and I tongue kissed on the dance floor while embracing, I pulled back and asked Jane how many fingers I was holding. I remember out of like 4 or 5 times I did the finger test consecutively in that moment, she got 1 wrong. I corrected her. I told her I didn’t want to take advantage of her and she told me that she wasn’t drunk, just “lit”. Jane then put her hand on my shoulder and thanked me for keeping her safe. I then told her that I wanted to make sure she was in control and she was safe (earlier that night, I helped a clearly drunk girl who fell into me find her friend (I did the fingers test on her and she did NOT respond, just glassy eyed, drunk stare and stoically shitfaced) so I already had safety at the forefront of the mind even more from that point). Jane’s response was that she was in control.
We then went to the patio and sat down. She then called me cute in a ditzy way with her giddy smile. We introduced ourselves and actually had a nice conversation. She then proceeded to say she wanted to have sex with me and if I was top or bottom. I told her that I wasn’t interested in sex with her (I was paranoid about STD’s since a relative of mine is a doctor, so I told her that if we were to do it in the future (not that night or the day after due to just being there for vibes, settling into the new year right, New Year’s Day streets were gonna be chaotic with drunk drivers and wild attitudes, I also didn’t bring protection), then I needed paperwork of when she last got tested after sex.
We got each other’s IG’s and planned Tuesday for us to hang out and have sex. Obviously it didn’t work out because my scaredy cat self didn’t create enough comfort and connection compared to attraction in the club. So she saw me as another cute guy who she made out with to 000’s crunk. Jane told her hot friends that I was a good guy and that I was looking out for them.
After we grinded with her friend, Jane and I shared more make out sessions (after she said I was hot and that she loved me) She then told me to tie her up and do naughty things to her. I just laughed and we danced and kissed the night away. The day after, her texts were very favorable and full of encouragement and positivity (we were talking about self improvement). We still follow each other on IG but ceased contact for now. Guess the emotions wore off. It’s all good.
I couldn’t help but make this post because I have generalized anxiety, sensory integration disorder, and non verbal learning disorder. I’m currently getting screened for autism at my regional center. Am I overthinking this whole event and thinking that I coerced her into kissing and shit (when she couldn’t get one of the finger holding rounds right)? I had a serious nervous breakdown over it in March. I deal with a lot of toxic shame and guilt but I don’t know what’s real and what’s not when it comes to truth or narratives that I create for myself. Whether they are healthy or not, am I ducking my ego? I don’t know please help!
2024.05.16 09:33 Enticing_Venom New Day, Old Drama. FauxMoi Locks Thread When an Age Gap Relationship is Discussed.
Fauxmoi is a subreddit dedicated to pop culture and celebrity gossip. Someone shares an article about Sarah Paulson (49) and her girlfriend Holland Taylor (81).
The Top Comment:
Unpopular opinion: I hate this relationship. I hate huge age gaps. It skeeves me out that when Sarah Paulson was born, Holland Taylor was 32 years old. Sarah Paulson was obviously well into adulthood when they met, but still.
With 4k upvotes, it hardly seemed unpopular. The top reply:
I think once you hit a certain age it genuinely does not matter, like a 39 year old definitely has a fully developed brain.. Not gonna stop me from laughing whenever i see pictures of them together and judging the hell outta sarah though lmao. i cannot imagine what could possibly be appealing about a relationship like that.
I don’t get this line of thinking. They didn’t meet when SP was a baby. They met after living wholes ass lives. It’s not some twilight imprinting shit 😂
Why are you judging Sarah? Are you calling olds ugly? What if someone is perfectly turned on by an old? What’s wrong with that?
I think what's upsetting or "skeevy" and "icky" is ageism. Society doesn't like old people, doesn't see them as sexual beings. Kind of infantalises them while disregarding them.
I cannot tell you how much I hate to bring this up because this exercise is bullshit 99% of the time, but in this case I can’t help but wonder if people would be pushing themselves to be so okay with this if Holland was a man. Obviously the dynamic is shifted by that change, but I’m always surprised that everyone seems to think it’s sweet, or something. It seems impossible for this relationship’s dynamic to not be affected somehow by the age gap, the generational disparity, etc.
I literally feel like I'm taking crazy pills. Isn't the whole POINT of discouraging age gap relationships to prevent abuse of the younger, more vulnerable partner? You really think Paulson's age puts her at higher risk of abuse here? If people's reaction to age gap relationships has transitioned...then what's even the fucking point of having the conversation?
I’m extremely shocked and confused. I do not like age gaps like this. Is it better that she’s not in her twenties or something? Definitely, but wow - I did not have this on my bingo card. How is everyone not in shock? Like, y’all knew about this?!!?
...Sarah herself has even alluded to mommy issues…Holland was 32 years old when Sarah was born. Besides acting, what could possibly be their common ground? The idea of a person born today becoming a potential love interest for me in 32 years is insane.
The common ground argument is so tired. How boring does one have to be to only be able to connect with someone who shares the same "common ground" as them. Even partners of the same age can have different interests, backgrounds, energy levels, etc. It's two adults clearly in love - why does it matter what their basis of connection is? You don't have to be the exact same person to love another.
The ageism is that you assume an older women couldn’t possibly have the same interests. Why can’t they like the same movies? The same music? The same restaurants?... “Besides acting” which is a huge chunk of both of their lives! That’s a ton to relate over! This kind of attitude is so dehumanizing to older people. As if they can’t acquire new experiences and tastes.
There’s also an imbalanced power dynamic in hetero relationships. Women are at high-risk for abuse from men, but we don’t generally condemn straight couples. Even though maybe we should. Instead, we let grown-ups make their own choices and hope people won’t be shitty to each other.
At what point does the age gap thing turn back around and get weird about the younger person dating the older one? With the declining faculties of 60+ age people and the mental gymnastics of coming to terms with rapidly approaching death the power dynamic has always seemed like it was heavily heavily in favor or the (in perspective) younger individual.
My 89 year old grandfather says he’s still 35 in his mind, and sometimes it feels like I’m talking to someone in my age range, he’s honestly one of the best friends I have, caring, listens to my issues, gives me great advice, has interesting insights on current events, cracks legit great jokes all the time. We mostly stay the same people through adulthood, our bodies just look a lot different.
So would you not feel a little weird if he brought home a 35-40 yr old woman?
Why are you exaggerating the age difference here? If you're comparing it to Sarah Paulson's relationship, it would be a 59 year old woman. And that seems fine, honestly.
Regardless, if the age gap doesn’t matter because they are consenting adults, what difference does it make what hypothetical age range I chose?
submitted by Enticing_Venom to SubredditDrama [link] [comments]
The Top Comment:
Unpopular opinion: I hate this relationship. I hate huge age gaps. It skeeves me out that when Sarah Paulson was born, Holland Taylor was 32 years old. Sarah Paulson was obviously well into adulthood when they met, but still.
With 4k upvotes, it hardly seemed unpopular. The top reply:
I think once you hit a certain age it genuinely does not matter, like a 39 year old definitely has a fully developed brain.. Not gonna stop me from laughing whenever i see pictures of them together and judging the hell outta sarah though lmao. i cannot imagine what could possibly be appealing about a relationship like that.
I don’t get this line of thinking. They didn’t meet when SP was a baby. They met after living wholes ass lives. It’s not some twilight imprinting shit 😂
Why are you judging Sarah? Are you calling olds ugly? What if someone is perfectly turned on by an old? What’s wrong with that?
I think what's upsetting or "skeevy" and "icky" is ageism. Society doesn't like old people, doesn't see them as sexual beings. Kind of infantalises them while disregarding them.
I cannot tell you how much I hate to bring this up because this exercise is bullshit 99% of the time, but in this case I can’t help but wonder if people would be pushing themselves to be so okay with this if Holland was a man. Obviously the dynamic is shifted by that change, but I’m always surprised that everyone seems to think it’s sweet, or something. It seems impossible for this relationship’s dynamic to not be affected somehow by the age gap, the generational disparity, etc.
I literally feel like I'm taking crazy pills. Isn't the whole POINT of discouraging age gap relationships to prevent abuse of the younger, more vulnerable partner? You really think Paulson's age puts her at higher risk of abuse here? If people's reaction to age gap relationships has transitioned...then what's even the fucking point of having the conversation?
I’m extremely shocked and confused. I do not like age gaps like this. Is it better that she’s not in her twenties or something? Definitely, but wow - I did not have this on my bingo card. How is everyone not in shock? Like, y’all knew about this?!!?
...Sarah herself has even alluded to mommy issues…Holland was 32 years old when Sarah was born. Besides acting, what could possibly be their common ground? The idea of a person born today becoming a potential love interest for me in 32 years is insane.
The common ground argument is so tired. How boring does one have to be to only be able to connect with someone who shares the same "common ground" as them. Even partners of the same age can have different interests, backgrounds, energy levels, etc. It's two adults clearly in love - why does it matter what their basis of connection is? You don't have to be the exact same person to love another.
The ageism is that you assume an older women couldn’t possibly have the same interests. Why can’t they like the same movies? The same music? The same restaurants?... “Besides acting” which is a huge chunk of both of their lives! That’s a ton to relate over! This kind of attitude is so dehumanizing to older people. As if they can’t acquire new experiences and tastes.
There’s also an imbalanced power dynamic in hetero relationships. Women are at high-risk for abuse from men, but we don’t generally condemn straight couples. Even though maybe we should. Instead, we let grown-ups make their own choices and hope people won’t be shitty to each other.
At what point does the age gap thing turn back around and get weird about the younger person dating the older one? With the declining faculties of 60+ age people and the mental gymnastics of coming to terms with rapidly approaching death the power dynamic has always seemed like it was heavily heavily in favor or the (in perspective) younger individual.
My 89 year old grandfather says he’s still 35 in his mind, and sometimes it feels like I’m talking to someone in my age range, he’s honestly one of the best friends I have, caring, listens to my issues, gives me great advice, has interesting insights on current events, cracks legit great jokes all the time. We mostly stay the same people through adulthood, our bodies just look a lot different.
So would you not feel a little weird if he brought home a 35-40 yr old woman?
Why are you exaggerating the age difference here? If you're comparing it to Sarah Paulson's relationship, it would be a 59 year old woman. And that seems fine, honestly.
Regardless, if the age gap doesn’t matter because they are consenting adults, what difference does it make what hypothetical age range I chose?
2024.05.16 09:00 Mizzno [H] Games [W] Cornucopia, Headbangers: Rhythm Royale, art of rally, Games (Listed Below), Steam Gift Cards
N.B.: I'm mainly looking for the games listed in the title and at the bottom of the thread. Feel free to post other offers, but if I haven't responded to your comment(s) by my next posting, I likely wasn't able to find a trade that interested me.
For sale (for Steam Gift Cards or gifted Steam Wallet balance):
For trade:
*signifies that a game is tentatively up for trade, assuming I buy the bundle
WANT:
IGS Rep Page: https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/ti26nz/mizznos_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Mizzno to indiegameswap [link] [comments]
For sale (for Steam Gift Cards or gifted Steam Wallet balance):
- Dark Souls™: Prepare To Die™ Edition (removed from Steam Store;
$350$400 or best offer) - Fall Guys (removed from Steam Store)
- Fall Guys - Dragon Hugger Pack (removed from Steam Store)
- Fall Guys - Icy Adventure Pack (removed from Steam Store)
Marvel's Avengers - The Definitive Edition (removed from Steam Store)Spec Ops: The Line (removed from Steam Store)
- Humble Hunie Sakura Bundle (can also trade for a full "charity" bundle (Australia Fire Relief Bundle or similar))
- Humble Sekai Project Bundle (can also trade for a full "charity" bundle (Stand with Ukraine Bundle or similar))
For trade:
*signifies that a game is tentatively up for trade, assuming I buy the bundle
- Destroy All Humans! 2 - Reprobed
- Life is Strange: True Colors
- Scorn
- There Is No Light: Enhanced Edition
- Arkham Horror: Mother's Embrace
- Blood Rage: Digital Edition
- Gloomhaven - Solo Scenarios: Mercenary Challenges
- Small World
- Small World - A Spider's Web
- Small World - Be not Afraid...
- Small World - Cursed!
- Small World - Grand Dames
- Small World - Royal Bonus
- Splendor
- Splendor - The Cities
- Splendor - The Strongholds
- Splendor - The Trading Posts
- Terraforming Mars
- A Short Hike(?)
- A Story Beside(?)
- Aces & Adventures(?)
- Arcade Spirits(?)
- Battlestar Galactica Deadlock(?)
- Beyond Blue(?)
- Cat Quest(?)
- Cook, Serve, Delicious! 3?!(?)
- EARTHLOCK(?)
- Harmony's Odyssey(?)
- Homeworld Remastered Collection(?)
- Lacuna – A Sci-Fi Noir Adventure(?)
- Minecraft: Java Edition - MCC Island Jingle Jam Rewards Pack(?)
- Monster Prom(?)
- Sifu Deluxe Cosmetic Pack(?)
- Spirit of the Island(?)
- SUPERHOT(?)
- Tinytopia(?)
- Toodee and Topdee(?)
- Train Valley 2(?)
- Turbo Golf Racing(?)
- Valthirian Arc: Hero School Story(?)
- Xenonauts(?)
- Back 4 Blood
- Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
- Batman: Arkham City - Game of the Year Edition
- Batman: Arkham Knight Premium Edition
- Batman™: Arkham Origins
- Injustice 2 Legendary Edition
- Mad Max
- Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor Game of the Year Edition
- Middle-earth: Shadow of War Definitive Edition
- Mortal Kombat 11
- Mortal Kombat 11 Ultimate Add-On Bundle
- Mortal Kombat XL
- Bionic Commando: Rearmed
- Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen
- Lost Planet 3 - Complete
- Mega Man Legacy Collection
- STRIDER™ / ストライダー飛竜®
- 112 Operator
- 911 Operator
- The Amazing American Circus
- Armello
- Backbone
- Calico
- Euro Truck Simulator 2
- Farming Simulator 17
- Ghostrunner
- Guilty Gear X2 #Reload
- Lust from Beyond: M Edition
- Monaco: What's Yours Is Mine
- Orbital Racer
- Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition
- PAYDAY 2
- Pilgrims
- Soulblight
- Space Crew: Legendary Edition
- Starfinder Core Rulebook (Paizo key) and Starfinder Adventure: Junker's Delight (Paizo key)
- Strange Brigade
- Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
- System Shock 2
- System Shock: Enhanced Edition
- Ticket to Ride
- XCOM® 2
- X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack
- Vampire: The Masquerade - Coteries of New York
- Vampire: The Masquerade - Shadows of New York
- Werewolf: The Apocalypse — Heart of the Forest
- Day of the Tentacle Remastered
- Grim Fandango Remastered
- Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
- STAR WARS®: Knights of the Old Republic™ II
- Highway Blossoms
- HunieCam Studio
- KARAKARA
- Sunrider Academy
- Sunrider: Liberation Day - Captain's Edition
- The Elder Scrolls: Legends: 2 Card Packs (Skyrim) 1 Event Ticket 100 Gold 100 Souls
- ESO Vanity Pet: Bristlegut Piglet and 15 Days of ESO Plus
- Ame no Marginal -Rain Marginal-
- KARAKARA
- Memory's Dogma CODE:01
- Narcissu 10th Anniversary Anthology Project
- Narcissu 10th Anniversary Anthology Project - Season Pass
- A Kiss For the Petals - Remembering How We Met
- Sakura Angels
- Beach Bounce
- Beach Bounce - Soundtrack
- Blue Rose
- Lionessy Story
- My Personal Angel
- Natural - Beyond Nature -
- Postmen Of Horizon (removed from Steam Store)
- Koi-Koi Japan [Hanafuda playing cards]
- Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle
- Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle : School Girls Edition
- Poker Pretty Girls Battle: Texas Hold'em
- Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
- Guns of Icarus Alliance
- Guns of Icarus Online
- Impossible Creatures Steam Edition
- Lethal League
- Tempest: Pirate Action RPG
- Tempest - Treasure Lands
- Tempest - Original Soundtrack
- Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf
- Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
- Tenta Shooter
- Gun Gun Pixies
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WANT:
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IGS Rep Page: https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/ti26nz/mizznos_igs_rep_page/
2024.05.16 08:57 Yurii_S_Kh St. Theodosius of the Kiev Caves
 | https://preview.redd.it/sq9ob43vkq0d1.png?width=450&format=png&auto=webp&s=00f9b50b4221afd75c3ba40d6bc078bded8781e1 submitted by Yurii_S_Kh to SophiaWisdomOfGod [link] [comments] Theodosius, whose name means "gift of God," grew up in the small cities of Vasilkov and Kursk where his father was a judge. Although his parents were Christian and gave him an education directed primarily at the study of Scripture, they were astonished to see his heart so completely overtaken by love for God. His father died when Theodosius was 13, and this caused the boy to retreat still further from the world common to one of his age and social rank. He gave away his good clothes, preferring to dress like the poor, and found pleasure in helping the peasants with their work. He often went to church, and when he learned that Divine Liturgy was sometimes not celebrated due to a lack of prosphora, he undertook to bake them himself. His mother loved him dearly, but she did not share her son's life-encompassing Christian outlook; she was very conscious of her social standing and felt that by engaging in such lowly occupations Theodosius brought shame upon the family. She tried cajoling, then threatening and even physically beating him to make him change his ways, but Theodosius stood firmly on the path of the Gospel commandments. His zeal for the things of God inspired Theodosius to slip away with a band of pilgrims bound for the Holy Land. Three days later his mother tracked him down, berated the pilgrims for having taken the boy along, and dragged Theodosius home where she kept him in chains until the youth promised not to leave her again. The humility of the youth and the sufferings he endured at the hands of his mother came to the attention of the governor who requested that the youth attend him in church. This served to calm the domestic drama, but Theodosius' heart yearned for a more concentrated spiritual atmosphere, for monastic life. Standing in church one day, he was struck by the words of the Gospel: "He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me." With fixed resolve, he took advantage of his mother's departure into the country for a few days to set out for Kiev, taking with him nothing but some bread for the road. The monks in the established monasteries, however, turned him away because he had no money. Then he heard about the righteous Anthony. Coming to his cave, Theodosius fell to his knees and begged the holy ascetic to accept him. "My son," said Anthony, "you see my cave; it is cramped and dismal, and I fear you will not endure the difficulties of life here." "Know, O blessed father," replied Theodosius. "that God Himself has led me to your holiness that I might find salvation. I shall do all that you enjoin." Foreseeing his future greatness, the blessed Anthony accepted the determined aspirant and bade the priest monk Nikon tonsure him. Theodosius was 23 years old. It was a few years before his distraught mother finally discovered her son’s whereabouts. With great reluctance Theodosius went out to her. At first she vowed that she would die if he did not come home with her. But gradually God softened her heart and she came to see the wisdom of her son's patient admonitions. Following his advice she entered the St. Nicholas convent there in Kiev where she ended her days in peace. https://preview.redd.it/h10jlboxkq0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=0b0cf8272c80cf80377438120ecc92fb8624389c When Theodosius became abbot, he saw need for a common rule to unite the growing community--which by that time was living above the ground; only a few hermits were left in the caves--and he sent one of his monks to Constantinople to copy out the rule of the Studite Monastery. The rule governed the daily life of the monk: it set the hours of prayer and work; monks were forbidden to have any personal possessions, everything was held in common; all monks were together for common meals: time, apart from prayer, was to be spent in working; all activity was begun with a blessing from an elder and with prayer. The monks were to reveal their thoughts to the abbot, a practice which roused them to constant spiritual vigilance and helped to check manifestations of the passions before they took root in the heart. Above all things, have fervent charity among yourselves (I Peter 4:8). It was St, Theodosius' choice of the Studite Rule, with its emphasis on the duty of charity and the common good, which served to revive the ancient ideal of strict cenobitism and gave Russian monasticism its characteristic warmth. "What is principally necessary," taught Theodosius, "is that the youngest should love their neighbor and listen to their elders with humility and obedience. The elders should lavish on the young love and instruction; they should teach them and comfort them." This attitude created an atmosphere eminently suitable for missionary work, and it was thanks to the monasteries that Christianity was so successfully propagated in Russia. Of a strong constitution, Theodosius was a model of industriousness. Even as abbot, he felled trees, carried water, and ground wheat, often helping the other brethren with their obediences. Once, the cook came to ask if he would assign a monk to cut firewood, as the kitchen supply was depleted. "I am idle," replied the Saint, and he set to chopping wood himself. He worked through the dinner hour and the brethren, when they came out and saw their abbot hard at work, were inspired to do likewise. Knowing the great benefit of good books upon the soul, Theodosius instituted the reading of spiritually profitable texts during meals, and sought to augment the number of such books in the monastery. Books were still a rarity at that time, and one of the valued occupations of the monastery was the copying and binding of manuscripts. Theodosius himself helped in this work. At first, life in the Caves Monastery was very austere indeed. The monks lived principally on rye bread and water with the addition of a few vegetables which they cultivated themselves; they wove their own cloth and sewed their own garments. When the brethren murmured about some deficiency, Theodosius exhorted them to place their trust in the Lord Who knew their needs. And his faith was often miraculously rewarded. The reputation of the monks as 'angels on earth' began attracting pilgrims; princes and peasants ca me for spiritual counsel and left donations. Grand Prince Izyaslav, who became very attached to St. Theodosius and frequently came to visit him, was a great benefactor of the monastery, as also was the Viking Prince Shimon who was baptized into the Orthodox Church together with his entire household, numbering some 3,000 members. With increased mean s, Theodosius was able to build a guest house for pilgrims where the poor and sick also found refuge. No beggar was ever turned away from the monastery without being given a meal. Weekly a cart was sent from the monastery laden with bread to be distributed among those in prison. The Saint's compassion was boundless. Once there were brought to him some robbers who had been apprehended in the act of stealing monastery property. With tears the Saint entreated them to mend their ways. Then, having fed them, he let them go. The robbers were so moved by the Saint's mercy that they repented and became honest, God-fearing men. Like St. Anthony, Theodosius also endured the effects of the princes' quarrels. At the same time he maintained his independence and did not fear risking the displeasure of his royal benefactors if he felt called as a spiritual father to admonish them. When, for example, Svyatoslav unjustly took the throne from Izyaslav, the Saint wrote a strong letter to Svyatoslav, reproving his action and urging him to restore power to his older brother. This angered Svyatoslav, and Theodosius was warned of possible consequences, but he calmly replied: "Nothing could be better for me in this life than to suffer for the sake of the truth." Mindful of the Saint' s popularity, Svyatoslav took no action against him and even went to visit him. He was surprised when Theodosius received him with the respect due to one of authority. "I was afraid you'd be angry with me," said the Prince. "Our duty," replied the Saint, "is to say what is beneficial for the soul's salvation; and you would do well to listen." Although Svyatoslav could not be persuaded to give up the throne and Theodosius continued to commemorate the pious Izyaslav as the lawful ruler, their relationship was peaceful and it was Svyatoslav who gave land for the building of the new stone church. Work had just begun on this church when St. Anthony reposed. Neither did St. Theodosius live to see its completion. It was his custom to retire to a cave for the course of Great Lent, and it was during this time, in 1074, that the Lord revealed to him his imminent departure from this world. On Bright Week, having joyfully celebrated the radiant feast of Pascha in the monastery, he fell ill. Summoning the brethren, he informed them that his time had come, and foretold the very day and hour of his repose. By common consent of the brotherhood, he blessed his disciple Stefan to take his place as abbot, exhorting him not to change the tradition s of the monastery, "but follow in all things the law and our monastic rifle." May 3,1074. The divinely appointed hour arrived and the bright soul of the Saint took leave of its earthly tabernacle. As he had willed, his body was laid to rest in the cave which alone with the angels had witnessed his ascetic labors. Eighteen years after the Saint's blessed repose, the monastery brethren decided to transfer his relics to the new cathedral church. The abbot, together with monk Nestor the chronicler, went to the cave to dig up the relics and discovered them to be incorrupt. Accompanied by a large crowd of people, the relics were solemnly transferred to the Dormition Cathedral on August 14, 1092. And in 1106 Saint Theodosius was added to the list of canonized saints. True to their promise, the holy founders of the Caves Monastery continued to watch over its existence even after their repose. There is, for example, the story written by Bishop Simon (+1226), a former monk of that monastery and principal author of the Kiev Caves Patericorn of how the stone church was completed. Sts. Anthony and Theodosius had been gone from this world some ten years when a group of Greek iconographers came to the Caves Lavra demanding to see the two monks who had hired them to adorn the new church with frescoes. They were rather angry inasmuch as the church standing before them was considerably larger than they had been led to believe and would consequently require more work than was covered by the sum of gold they had received there in Constantinople upon signing the agreement. Abbot Nikon, confessing his ignorance of the matter, asked who it was that had hired them. "Their names were Anthony and Theodosius," "Truly," said the abbot, "I cannot summon them, for they departed this life ten years ago. But as you yourselves testify, they continue to care for this monastery even now." https://preview.redd.it/k3vsiyu1lq0d1.png?width=172&format=png&auto=webp&s=a3408a2561adad1709eba7009c45d9ef7497f068 The Greeks, scarcely believing this possible, called some merchants traveling with them, who had been present at the signing of the agreement, and asked that they be shown an image of the deceased. When this was done the Greeks bowed low, for they recognized in the saints the exact likeness of the two men who had commissioned them to paint the frescoes and given them the gold. Acknowledging the supernatural power of the saints, they decided not to cancel the agreement after all, and set about with heightened inspiration to embellish the church. The iconographers never returned to Constantinople; they became monks and ended their days there in the Caves Monastery. The Dormition Church, rebuilt in 1470, was destroyed in 1941 by an explosion which the Soviets attribute to the Germans. Witnesses, however, state that it was the communists themselves who set delayed action explosives just before the German occupation of the city. Orthodox America |
2024.05.16 08:50 evf811881221 Looking for a coven or a solo OF witch
https://open.spotify.com/track/72hSmnleYTiiOo23q8ZJIS?si=L4NE6mtMQvydXPLd-KBQXQ
To start, the number in my name helps explain me before you know my name.
Evf stands for energetic vibrational frequencies. Basically im what happens when a mage is awoken from a sleep cell sort of condition.
Think MK Ultra, cause i understand that MK means memtical knowledge.
Yep, bout a good time to toss on muysic and get ready to rabbit hole any terms you dont get.
Synchronicities and the ouroboros are good starts, then research into knot theory. Finally read through the book Kozyrev put out on his mirrors experiments.
Tesla was another good key. Quotes, music, all sorts of knowledge is hidden in plain sight, but it takes a real madman to understand what ive found.
The point being, the more you end up fulfilling this quote:
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents... some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new Dark Age. H.P. Lovecraft
My birth name is Merlyn. Im looking for any witches who want to adapt my knowledge and help me with the craziest thing.
Imagine if Crowley used sex magics for improving the human minds. Since porn has become such a quagmire for bored lonely men, the right director with the right understanding of memetics could change a few things.
Sadly im a middle aged average man, so not my wheel house to get on vid, and im too poor to pay for anything.
Im an angel awoke as a human, would he be rich or poor?
https://open.spotify.com/track/5yaEx1flpZmNBiPyAT8iUx?si=LwLgPIYsSW-BNjnARDpuAw
Im rich in knowledge and so long as i can get it to the right witch, they can do what i cannot. Ive got the youtube plans on my own.
Yet to change that primal programming, to actually use it for good instead of wealth, it takes something as primal, beautiful freaky naked ladies.
So hit me up, least i can do is explain myself. Be blessed, as above so below.
submitted by evf811881221 to u/evf811881221 [link] [comments]
To start, the number in my name helps explain me before you know my name.
Evf stands for energetic vibrational frequencies. Basically im what happens when a mage is awoken from a sleep cell sort of condition.
Think MK Ultra, cause i understand that MK means memtical knowledge.
Yep, bout a good time to toss on muysic and get ready to rabbit hole any terms you dont get.
Synchronicities and the ouroboros are good starts, then research into knot theory. Finally read through the book Kozyrev put out on his mirrors experiments.
Tesla was another good key. Quotes, music, all sorts of knowledge is hidden in plain sight, but it takes a real madman to understand what ive found.
The point being, the more you end up fulfilling this quote:
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents... some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new Dark Age. H.P. Lovecraft
My birth name is Merlyn. Im looking for any witches who want to adapt my knowledge and help me with the craziest thing.
Imagine if Crowley used sex magics for improving the human minds. Since porn has become such a quagmire for bored lonely men, the right director with the right understanding of memetics could change a few things.
Sadly im a middle aged average man, so not my wheel house to get on vid, and im too poor to pay for anything.
Im an angel awoke as a human, would he be rich or poor?
https://open.spotify.com/track/5yaEx1flpZmNBiPyAT8iUx?si=LwLgPIYsSW-BNjnARDpuAw
Im rich in knowledge and so long as i can get it to the right witch, they can do what i cannot. Ive got the youtube plans on my own.
Yet to change that primal programming, to actually use it for good instead of wealth, it takes something as primal, beautiful freaky naked ladies.
So hit me up, least i can do is explain myself. Be blessed, as above so below.