A wise man once told me,
If you can hold a fork you can go to York
If you can walk and talk you can go to Brock
​
But if I build a canoe
and sail the ocean blue
go to peru
stage a coup
even if I get 102
they still won't let me into Waterloo
​
But maybe if I forge my path anew
my electrons always spin in twos
my booleans are always true
the formulas I always knew
the 102 I will pursue
maybe maybe they'll let me into Waterloo
​
My paper's due
did not review
the test I blew
the course withdrew
I'm not getting into Waterloo
​
I can still make my debut
my efforts I will renew
I have a clue
I will get through
guys I got into Waterloo

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D-backs (18-21) @ Orioles (25-12)

First Pitch: 4:05 PM at Oriole Park at Camden Yards

Team	Starter	TV	Radio
D-backs	Ryne Nelson (2-2, 5.23 ERA)	ARID	98.7 FM , KQMR (ES)
Orioles	John Means (1-0, 0.00 ERA)	MASN2	98 Rock

MLB	Fangraphs	Reddit Stream	IRC Chat
Gameday	Game Graph	Live Comments	Libera: ##baseball

Line Score - Game Over

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	R	H	E	LOB
AZ	0	0	2	0	2	0	0	0	0	0	0	4	7	0	7
BAL	0	1	1	0	1	0	0	1	0	0	1	5	13	0	10

Box Score

BAL		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
SS	Henderson	4	1	2	1	1	0	.278
C	Rutschman	5	0	0	0	0	1	.306
PR	McKenna	0	0	0	0	0	0	.375
C	McCann	0	0	0	0	0	0	.224
DH	O'Hearn	4	0	1	1	1	0	.294
1B	Mountcastle	5	1	3	0	0	1	.288
RF	Santander	4	1	1	1	1	1	.217
LF	Cowser	5	1	1	0	0	1	.265
3B	Westburg	5	0	4	2	0	0	.301
LF	Kjerstad	3	0	0	0	0	1	.143
CF	Mullins	1	0	0	0	0	1	.192
2B	Mateo	4	1	1	0	0	0	.250

BAL	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Means	4.2	6	4	4	0	3	89-60	3.09
Baumann	2.1	1	0	0	0	0	22-15	4.02
Akin	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	17-10	3.12
Cano	1.0	0	0	0	1	0	19-9	1.80
Coulombe	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	15-12	2.40
Kimbrel	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	11-7	4.11

AZ		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
DH	Marte, K	4	1	1	2	0	0	.294
CF	Carroll	4	0	0	1	0	1	.195
LF	Gurriel Jr.	5	0	2	1	0	0	.245
1B	Walker, C	4	0	0	0	0	1	.273
RF	Grichuk	3	0	1	0	0	0	.273
PH	Pederson	1	0	0	0	0	0	.299
RF	McCarthy	1	0	0	0	0	1	.295
3B	Suárez, E	4	0	0	0	1	1	.222
C	Moreno	4	0	0	0	0	0	.242
2B	Alexander	4	1	1	0	0	1	.263
SS	Newman	4	2	2	0	0	1	.197

AZ	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Nelson, R	4.2	10	3	3	0	3	87-64	5.33
Thompson, R	1.1	0	0	0	0	1	13-11	1.10
Mantiply	1.0	0	0	0	0	0	9-6	3.31
Ginkel	1.0	1	1	1	0	0	9-7	3.31
Sewald	1.0	1	0	0	1	1	26-18	3.00
Jarvis	1.0	1	1	0	2	1	17-11	4.91

Scoring Plays

Inning	Event	Score
B2	Jordan Westburg doubles (8) on a sharp line drive to center fielder Corbin Carroll. Ryan Mountcastle scores.	1-0
T3	Ketel Marte homers (9) on a fly ball to left field. Kevin Newman scores.	1-2
B3	Ryan O'Hearn singles on a line drive to left fielder Lourdes Gurriel Jr. Jorge Mateo scores.	2-2
T5	Corbin Carroll out on a sacrifice fly to left fielder Heston Kjerstad. Blaze Alexander scores.	2-3
T5	Lourdes Gurriel Jr. singles on a line drive to left fielder Heston Kjerstad. Kevin Newman scores. Ketel Marte to 2nd.	2-4
B5	Gunnar Henderson homers (12) on a fly ball to right center field.	3-4
B8	Anthony Santander homers (7) on a line drive to center field.	4-4
B11	Jordan Westburg singles on a ground ball to right fielder Jake McCarthy. Colton Cowser scores.	5-4

Highlights

Description	Length
Bullpen availability for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:07
Bullpen availability for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:07
Bench availability for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:07
Fielding alignment for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:11
Bench availability for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:07
Fielding alignment for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:11
Starting lineups for D-backs at Orioles - May 11, 2024	0:09
The distance behind Ketel Marte's home run	0:13
Breaking down John Means' pitches	0:04
Breaking down Ryne Nelson's pitches	0:04
Measuring the stats on Gunnar Henderson's home run	0:12
Anthony Santander: Home Run Statcast Analysis	0:13
Jorge Mateo's sliding play	0:18
Jordan Westburg's RBI double	0:27
Blaze Alexander hits a foul ball after review	0:24
Ketel Marte's two-run home run (9)	0:23
Ryan O'Hearn's RBI single	0:18
Heston Kjerstad's sliding catch	0:22
Corbin Carroll's sacrifice fly	0:19
Lourdes Gurriel Jr.'s RBI single	0:20
John Means' fourth and final strikeout	0:06
Gunnar Henderson's solo home run (12)	0:25
Ryne Nelson's third and final strikeout	0:06
Gunnar Henderson's superb play	0:20
Anthony Santander's game-tying home run (7)	0:22
Jorge Mateo's diving catch	0:18
Bryce Jarvis induces double play, escapes jam	0:12

Decisions

Winning Pitcher	Losing Pitcher	Save
Kimbrel (4-1, 4.11 ERA)	Jarvis (0-2, 4.91 ERA)

Attendance	Weather	Wind
	70°F, Partly Cloudy	3 mph, Out To LF

HP	1B	2B	3B
Chad Whitson	Bill Miller	Malachi Moore	John Bacon

Game ended at 7:16 PM.
Remember to sort by new to keep up!

D-backs (18-21) @ Orioles (25-12)

First Pitch: 1:05 PM at Oriole Park at Camden Yards

Team	Starter	TV	Radio
D-backs	Ryne Nelson (2-2, 5.23 ERA)	ARID	98.7 FM , KQMR (ES)
Orioles	John Means (1-0, 0.00 ERA)	MASN2	98 Rock

MLB	Fangraphs	Baseball Savant	Reddit Stream	IRC Chat
Gameday	Game Graph	Strikezone Map	Live Comments	Libera: ##baseball

Line Score - Game Over

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	R	H	E	LOB
AZ	0	0	2	0	2	0	0	0	0	0	0	4	7	0	7
BAL	0	1	1	0	1	0	0	1	0	0	1	5	13	0	10

Box Score

BAL		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
SS	Henderson	4	1	2	1	1	0	.278
C	Rutschman	5	0	0	0	0	1	.306
PR	McKenna	0	0	0	0	0	0	.375
C	McCann	0	0	0	0	0	0	.224
DH	O'Hearn	4	0	1	1	1	0	.294
1B	Mountcastle	5	1	3	0	0	1	.288
RF	Santander	4	1	1	1	1	1	.217
LF	Cowser	5	1	1	0	0	1	.265
3B	Westburg	5	0	4	2	0	0	.301
LF	Kjerstad	3	0	0	0	0	1	.143
CF	Mullins	1	0	0	0	0	1	.192
2B	Mateo	4	1	1	0	0	0	.250

BAL	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Means	4.2	6	4	4	0	3	89-60	3.09
Baumann	2.1	1	0	0	0	0	22-15	4.02
Akin	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	17-10	3.12
Cano	1.0	0	0	0	1	0	19-9	1.80
Coulombe	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	15-12	2.40
Kimbrel	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	11-7	4.11

AZ		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
DH	Marte, K	4	1	1	2	0	0	.294
CF	Carroll	4	0	0	1	0	1	.195
LF	Gurriel Jr.	5	0	2	1	0	0	.245
1B	Walker, C	4	0	0	0	0	1	.273
RF	Grichuk	3	0	1	0	0	0	.273
PH	Pederson	1	0	0	0	0	0	.299
RF	McCarthy	1	0	0	0	0	1	.295
3B	Suárez, E	4	0	0	0	1	1	.222
C	Moreno	4	0	0	0	0	0	.242
2B	Alexander	4	1	1	0	0	1	.263
SS	Newman	4	2	2	0	0	1	.197

AZ	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Nelson, R	4.2	10	3	3	0	3	87-64	5.33
Thompson, R	1.1	0	0	0	0	1	13-11	1.10
Mantiply	1.0	0	0	0	0	0	9-6	3.31
Ginkel	1.0	1	1	1	0	0	9-7	3.31
Sewald	1.0	1	0	0	1	1	26-18	3.00
Jarvis	1.0	1	1	0	2	1	17-11	4.91

Scoring Plays

Inning	Event	Score
B2	Jordan Westburg doubles (8) on a sharp line drive to center fielder Corbin Carroll. Ryan Mountcastle scores.	1-0
T3	Ketel Marte homers (9) on a fly ball to left field. Kevin Newman scores.	1-2
B3	Ryan O'Hearn singles on a line drive to left fielder Lourdes Gurriel Jr. Jorge Mateo scores.	2-2
T5	Corbin Carroll out on a sacrifice fly to left fielder Heston Kjerstad. Blaze Alexander scores.	2-3
T5	Lourdes Gurriel Jr. singles on a line drive to left fielder Heston Kjerstad. Kevin Newman scores. Ketel Marte to 2nd.	2-4
B5	Gunnar Henderson homers (12) on a fly ball to right center field.	3-4
B8	Anthony Santander homers (7) on a line drive to center field.	4-4
B11	Jordan Westburg singles on a ground ball to right fielder Jake McCarthy. Colton Cowser scores.	5-4

Highlights

Description	Length
Bullpen availability for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:07
Bullpen availability for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:07
Bench availability for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:07
Fielding alignment for Arizona, May 11 vs Orioles	0:11
Bench availability for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:07
Fielding alignment for Baltimore, May 11 vs D-backs	0:11
Starting lineups for D-backs at Orioles - May 11, 2024	0:09
The distance behind Ketel Marte's home run	0:13
Breaking down John Means' pitches	0:04
Breaking down Ryne Nelson's pitches	0:04
Measuring the stats on Gunnar Henderson's home run	0:12
Anthony Santander: Home Run Statcast Analysis	0:13
Jorge Mateo's sliding play	0:18
Jordan Westburg's RBI double	0:27
Blaze Alexander hits a foul ball after review	0:24
Ketel Marte's two-run home run (9)	0:23
Ryan O'Hearn's RBI single	0:18
Heston Kjerstad's sliding catch	0:22
Corbin Carroll's sacrifice fly	0:19
Lourdes Gurriel Jr.'s RBI single	0:20
John Means' fourth and final strikeout	0:06
Gunnar Henderson's solo home run (12)	0:25
Ryne Nelson's third and final strikeout	0:06
Gunnar Henderson's superb play	0:20
Anthony Santander's game-tying home run (7)	0:22
Jorge Mateo's diving catch	0:18
Bryce Jarvis induces double play, escapes jam	0:12

Decisions

Winning Pitcher	Losing Pitcher	Save
Kimbrel (4-1, 4.11 ERA)	Jarvis (0-2, 4.91 ERA)

Game ended at 4:17 PM.
Remember to sort by new to keep up!

Okay, so i got Orto Parisi Megamare after reading all the reviews saying that it is the best perfoming fragrance of all time (excluding followed lmao) and that it is a polarising and stanky fragrance
So being the wild man that i am, i decided to blind buy it, and man I DO NOT REGRET THAT
It opens up with an average blue citrusy marine smell, but with an added depth and an accord that kinda reminds me of acetone
Then it dries down into this musty, kinda stanky, old, wet musk goodness, and that salty salty seaweed, with some depth and some metallic accord that’s probably poseidon’s blood (and when i say depth i really mean it; OH MY GOD it is deeper than mia khalifa)
The drydown literally smells like a canoe that’s got an old carpet in it, and seaweed that sticked to it’s outer walls, floating in the north sea and crashing into a collosal iceberg made of pure salt, and then found by an old rusty ship that’s transporting all kinds of precious woods. intriguing to say the least.
I ain’t reached the base notes yet because i sprayied it like 3 hours ago (gonna update tommorow regarding the longevity and the deep deep rewarding dry down)
Sillage is ridiculous;
Sprayed half a spray on my inner elbow and OMFG the whole room started to smell like it
It smelled like there was some kind of blue fog slowly rising upon the bedroom
I then went to the bathroom to take a piss, and i prolly stayed there for like 40 seconds
My mother then entered the bathroom and complained about me spraying the bathroom with perfume
So the smell LINGERS AND LINGERS
The smell also sticks;
I usually hug a pillow when i’m lying in bed (and im not a sad,depressed loner before y’all ask /s) And oh my god i hugged that pillow for like 1 minute and then sniffed it out of pure curiosity and not surprisingly the smell sticked to the pillow
I am literally cursed by musk and seaweed and i do not know if i will break this curse in the next 36 hours.
AND OH DID I MENTION THE FRAGRANCE IS A TESTER THAT I BOUGHT FOR HALF THE PRICE? LOL
Anyways, gonna update soon. :3
UPDATE: 22 hours and a shower later the perfume still projects like crazy still smells like the middle notes lol gonna update tonight
UPDATE 2: after 33 hours it still faintly smells, it is a skin smell now

Sooo, at risk of sounding like yet another "travelling to/any recommendations" post to cause even more teeth grinding.(I used the search, I checked google, instagram, reviews etc first...honest!)
I still think the best opinions are gonna come from other like minded people on here who enjoy tiki bars.
Anyhow, I'm travelling to the UK in about a month for a wedding I'm gonna be bouncing around between Cardiff, Dublin, Glassgow, Edinburgh and London. Tiki bars wont be my main focus this time around but It's always nice to find new places to visit.
I've done Cardiff before. Found Kapu, the one whole "Tiki bar" (read: tiki flavored club with a dj) in Cardiff.
I also visited London last year, narrowly missed the closure of the Trader Vic's by less then a month(heartbreaking) and experienced Beachcomber, Trailer Happiness and Laki Kane(probably worth a revisit)
I've also seen a few mentions of a Sugar Cane bar in posts here and come across a Kona Kai and Mahiki through other searches. Anyone know if these places are worth a visit or are they just more vaguely themed nightclubs and should I skip them in favor of a good rum bar?
I've come across a couple recent posts here for Ohana in Dublin so that's already on my list of things to see there and I won't bother asking about it.
Last question is more around finding if anyone has recently been to a tiki bar or something like it in either Edinburgh or Glasgow? Some old posts seem to point to a place called 52 Canoes in Edinburgh being decent but it looks like it's closed down now. I see a Tiki Bar and Kitsch Inn in Glasgow and Paradaise Palms in Edinburgh but can't find much about either. Again worth a visit or am I better off looking for a rum bar?
Places come and go quickly sometimes so any current knowledge is greatly appreciated.

Engaging with Novalink in Brownsville Texas was a nightmare experience for my business and after 12 months of distress, I have taken the time to write this in-depth review of what I experienced, with this horrific manufacturer, in hopes of saving someone else's business. I have never written a review online, but Novalink Inc deserves this honest review. I want every company to read the following and beware of this manufacturer and take your business elsewhere.
So let's dive into the details. I am a business owner with a fashion accessory product. I have spent the last 5 years building my business from the ground up, working very hard to do so and having an amazing community of customers and support. In 2022 my business started to really take off, therefore I was looking for a new manufacturer to scale with. In 2023 I entered into a binding agreement with Novalink to produce 30,000 units annually of my product. 30,000 was Novalink's MOQ and my business was ready for this level based on the demand. However Novalink proved themselves utterly incapable of fulfilling even the most basic manufacturing obligations, leaving my business in shambles. This review is going to tell you everything you need to know.
From my experience Novalink lacks complete professionalism, lacks ethics, lacks product quality, and finding all of this out was breathtaking. Not only did Novalink completely fail to uphold their end of our manufacturing agreement, (I received 0 correct units out of 30,000 units promised) but their response to their own incompetence was nothing short of appalling. Rather than owning up to their failures and taking accountability for what they did to my product and business, the men that run this company resorted to cowardly finger-pointing, attempting to shift blame onto me. It's abundantly clear from my experience that integrity, ethics, and accountability are foreign concepts to Novalink, and please be warned they do not care at all about their clients.
I had an annual contract with Novalink that commenced in mid-March 2023, as stated above for 30,000 units. We came to this agreement in January 2023, and the conversation for this agreement started in November 2022 but really went all the way back to 2021. So we start this agreement in March and by May 2023, I was compelled to stop the entire production line due to a myriad of issues. These issues including faulty products, Novalink producing and releasing incorrect sizing, and Novalink using improper materials including but not limited to using the wrong thread in my product which I instructed not to do from the start. At the beginning of this agreement, I toured Novalink’s factory in person, met with their engineer, provided instructions on how to cut my fabrics, instructions on our sizing, instructions on product specifics, etc, but I was told from the start by their engineer that I was incorrect in many of my details. I was very confused why he was telling me I was incorrect, but he claimed he had 20+ years of experience and knew what he was talking about. When we later fell into all the below issues I realized it was the engineer and Novalink that were wrong from the start. Its important to note here that I was also introduced to a women at Novalink during my factory visit who I was told would be creating my tech packs in house, they claimed this is a service they do for many of their clients (apparently not, beware).
After issues arose in May 2023 I shut down the production line at the factory as mentioned above. I thought the issues I identified in May would be resolved quite quickly within 1-2 weeks. However the shut down of my production line continued on for the next 4 months. You might be thinking why 4 months? Well you see after I shut down the line in May things started to get worse and worse and worse. Novalink was getting really aggressive with me and denying any wrong doing of the product. It started to turn into a battle instead of them just fixing what had been done incorrectly. By June Novalink agreed to send me new samples to restart the production line, and when I received these new samples I was left to find out that the samples they sent me had holes and skipped stitching in the sewing. I found this out because the product the sent me was literally falling apart at the seams and unravelling when I tried to wear it.
Shockingly, when I confronted Novalink about the new quality issue and product falling apart (holes in the sewing) the CEO Jason Wolfe actually admitted they were INTENTIONALLY sewing holes in my products and purposefully sewing skipping stitching. I was baffled and in complete disbelief. The other people involved in these unacceptable practices were, the CEO of Novalink Jason Wolfe, engineer Manuel Campos, and Production lead Luis Musquiz, callously defending their shoddy workmanship. I was on a phone call with these men in early July and I told them I absolutely will not under any circumstances EVER accept holes or skipped stitching to be sewn in my products. I have a serious serious stance on product quality and my customers deserve the absolute best product. Do you know what they said to me? Novalink started to turn the blame on to me. Jason Wolfe stated that I wanted holes in my product the entire time. (What?) He started to say that the holes in the sewing were correct and that's what I wanted. told them repeatedly, no I do not want holes sewn in my product, and I will never accept this, and I never ever asked for holes to be sewn into my product. I couldnt understand why they were creating a false narrative like this. Novalink refused to accept what I was saying. I continued to say "No I will not accept holes sewn in my product, I want you to sew in a correct straight line at the highest quality which we originally agreed on". Jason Wolfe went as far as saying that, and I quote, "Novalink doesn't take demands from clients and Novalink can sew holes in my product if they want to." This went on and on and despite my repeated demands for proper quality control and proper production of my products, Novalink adamantly refused to comply. Now you might be thinking why would they sew holes into your product? It's common sense that a brand doesn't want holes in their product, well let me tell you that Novalink lacks complete common sense then.
While all of this arguing over holes in the sewing was going on, my production line was down for a total of 4 months from May to August. I had no choice but to allow Novalink all this time to rectify the issue, and I truly believed during the first 3 months that they would fix this since we were arguing over the bare minimum in sewing and we had an agreement. Even a beginner sewer would know you shouldn't purposely sew holes in a product. As you can imagine, my business was losing thousands of dollars per day that I waited, I lost well into 6 figures while this was going on, but I took the losses and trusted that Novalink would fix the issues since we had an agreement. However after 4 months Novalink did not fix the issues, they actually kept defending the holes in the sewing and kept sending me product with holes in it through August. They aggressively argued with me about my own product, and the situation only deteriorated.
In August 2023, Novalink abruptly breached and terminated our agreement. I continued to say I will not accept product with holes sewn into it. Novalink decided to then terminate my production line altogether, and gave me no warning. The last email I sent to Novalink was in August 2023 and basically me begging them to send me another sample of my product without holes sewn in it. Next thing you know I receive an email from Jason Wolfe saying his board voted to terminate my production line. This action left my business in a dire situation, with no plan for recovery, and serious financial damage. The termination of the annual production line all together resulted in over 7 figures of damages ($1 Million loss and damages). I was supposed to get 30,000 units, and I got 0 produced correctly. (By the way I was also heavily ignored by Novalink during those 4 months, and I have tons of emails and phone calls to prove I was purposefully ignored. I could upload the proof to this Reddit thread) The CEO Jason Wolfe's disregard for the ramifications of this termination on my business was staggering. He callously terminated our annual contract with the snap of his fingers, while I bore the brunt of the fallout. Despite my efforts to seek recourse through legal action, Novalink has callously denied all wrongdoing, further exacerbating the injustice and in-balancing of these scales.
What I am about to say here is in no way defamation or false accusations, I am speaking of my experience with Jason Wolfe, and I believe Jason Wolfe is an example of a snake of a human being. Based on my experience, I found Jason Wolfe's actions to be untrustworthy, deceitful, unethical, and not in line with professional standards. Anyone looking to scale their business with an honest and reliable manufacturing partner, should be warned of this. I feel compelled to share my experience with other business owners to prevent you from falling victim to Novalink's deceitful practices.
I am currently pursuing legal action against Novalink to seek full justice for the irreparable harm they have caused to me and my business. Business owners beware: engaging with Novalink could spell DISASTER for your business, and I implore you to exercise caution and seek alternative manufacturing partners. But continue reading below if you want to know more.
Let's delve deeper into the depths of their misconduct and what my business went through due to Novalink's actions:

1. The product itself was a disaster, quality was quite literally horrific, as I mentioned before holes being sewn and product disintegrating at the seams literally falling apart due to the manufacturer's negligence and incompetence, and unwillingness to sew correctly.
2. As a direct consequence of their poor quality and abrupt termination of our contract, I faced a torrent of customer returns, thousands of canceled orders, cancelled contracts with 3^rd party relationships, cancelled expo and tradeshow contracts, cancelled TV show opportunities, and more, plunging my business into turmoil and financial ruin.
3. The actions of Novalink pushed me perilously close to bankruptcy, forcing me to scramble for months to find a new manufacturing partner and rebuild my business from scratch. (FYI – My new manufacturing partner is doing an amazing job and has sewed ZERO holes in my product from day
4. Adding insult to injury, Novalink and Jason Wolfe attempted to coerce me into signing a "mutual termination document" in November 2023 after they terminated our agreement, under duress. Novalink knows that this termination was in no way mutual, yet they were demanding my signature on a "MUTUAL Termination" document. I refused to sign this document since it stated I could never take legal action against Novalink (convenient ay?) Since I would not sign the document Novalink and Jason Wolfe decided to attempt withholding my $33,000 of raw material that was left over at their factory, as leverage. You might be thinking why did you leave $33,000 of material there? Because I had no where to go. I shipped the material to them in February-March, it was supposed to be turned into product, but when they terminated the agreement in August they gave me no warning and no plan. The material had to sit there while I figured out next steps and if my business would even survive. So Novalink decided to use what I left as leverage. They wanted me to sign this document so I could never sue them, and Jason Wolfe stated over email that they would refuse to give my own property back to me, until I signed. I wrote back on email saying sorry I refuse to accept your terms and bribe to sign this document. Jason said "then we will refuse to give back your materials. You can not get your materials back until you sign it". Like are you kidding me? Only a guilty person acts like this. Willing to stop at nothing to bribe me for a signature so they could ensure I wouldn't sue them. Really shady business practice and again complete lack of ethics. I should add Novalink also claimed I owed them an additional $5,000 (I paid them money for the bad inventory they produced and I never got that money back by the way. They thought I should pay them $5,000 more AFTER terminating my business from their factory) . Novalink made sure to let me know that along with my signature on this document they were willing to “Waive” this $5,000 fee they believed I owed them. Interestingly enough they didn’t give me the option to state what I lost (because they knew it was well over $1 Million, and they also didn't give me the option to just pay the $5,000 outright. Their act of not even asking me to pay the $5k, and upfront stating they would "Waive" this fee for me, makes me believe they assumed I wouldn’t be able to pay it. Why would they assume that? Oh because they know what they did and the damages they caused, they knew they put my business in financial ruin after breached the agreement. Their audacious attempt to avoid legal accountability and stop me from ever being able to sue them speaks volumes about their character.
5. Furthermore, Novalink lied about thoroughly reviewing my product from the start which was another bed of deceit, demonstrating a shocking lack of integrity and professionalism. I was told by Novalink’s sales lead Jason Varvel over the phone once in November 2022, twice in January 2023, and again a third time in January 2023 that the engineers at Novalink had reviewed my product THREE times, reverse engineered it, and said it was “Easy.” Jason Varvel used the word easy three times over the phone with me and claimed all 16 samples I sent them in December 2022 were reviewed and Novalink was "ready to go". We came to an entire manufacturing agreement based on these 16 samples. And it's important to note here that I actually talked to Novalink prior in 2021 and sent them a sample. I was almost more trusting of them from the start because we had spoken for 2 years. So I agree to scale my business with them and onboard as a new client. I decided to visit their factory and went to Brownsville Texas in late February to review final samples, walk through, and prepare for production. When I got to the factory this was after weeks of phone calls, and even a zoom call, weeks of emails, and preparing for production. When I was there the engineer at Novalink (Manuel Campos) told me to my face he had never seen my 16 product samples before. I was extremely confused because we had been talking about these samples for weeks and I had a zoom call with him 2 weeks prior talking about these samples. Turns out, he was lying the entire time. He never actually reviewed these samples at all and never reverse engineered them. I then found out they had been reviewing a 2 year old sample of my product from 2021, and presented me with an entire manufacturing agreement based off the old 2 year old sample, which I told Jason Varvel and the engineer multiple times November 2022 was no longer correct. I was mislead by them to think the quoted me based off my 15 new samples. And you want to know where these samples were? They were sitting in the back office of their Texas warehouse - completely unopened and unexamined, yet they told me THREE times that they had examined these specific samples. Jason Wolfe denies this to this date and states the box of samples was never missing or sitting in their warehouse and that they reviewed all 15 units of my product before providing me with the manufacturing agreement. But funny enough I went to the warehouse during this trip to Brownsville, the day after I found all this out from the engineer. And while I was at the warehouse I met with their warehouse director, Juan Canos. So I asked Juan where the box of 15 samples was that I had sent 2 months prior and that they made this entire agreement based on. Juan laughed in my face and said “You’ll never believe this, that box was sitting in the back corner of my office for the last 2 months. I had no idea what it was so it was sitting on the floor in the corner under a pile of other boxes.” Meaning, Novalink lied to me the entire time about reviewing my product samples. They got me to agree to an entire manufacturing agreement, agree to their MOQ of 30,000 units, accepted 40,000 worth of my raw material, said they would start production within 2 months and called me a new client, all before they ever actually saw the correct product units. From my experience I feel it was clear that Novalink did not take my product seriously and they saw my business as an easy opportunity to generate revenue for themselves, without really reviewing the product or work involved.
6. After all this went down during my visit in February the CEO Jason Wolfe assured me this must have been some big misunderstanding and that "Novalink doesn't make mistakes". He gave me his word that they were experts and never fail and they could still easily produce my product. This proved to be untrue. 1 day after my visit Novalink agreed to a new manufacturing price for my product. I knew there was no way they had actually studied my product within 1 day to come to a correct price, you typically need to run time studies to get accurate pricing and I dont believe this can be done within 24 hours, but they kept telling me they were experts and this is how they do things. I accepted the updated manufacturing price in writing and moved forward. This is then where the erratic pricing behavior started. CEO Jason Wolfe attempted to change the agreed-upon price in the following month, multiple times without justification, further highlighting their incompetence and disregard for contractual agreements. Jason claimed he needed to change the price 3 times after we had already agreed in writing on a price per unit. The only reason they had to attempt to change the price so many times was because they never actually reviewed the product from the start, and never ran thorough time studies properly. They just threw a number out there that they knew I would accept, a number honestly too good to be true, which I thought was a blessing at the time, but ultimately it was a way to land my business and suck me in. I refused to accept Jason’s 3 price increase attempts, and as you can see things got worse for me from there. It was a dishonest mess from the start.
7. It became evident after all the issues arose that Novalink mislead me to believe they had the correct machinery and sewing skills as well, they were ill-equipped for the job, relying on outdated sewing machines/skills and incorrect attachment folders. Then forcing their engineers to scramble for makeshift solutions due to their inability to source proper equipment. And I am not just saying this, the engineer Manuel Campos literally emailed me after all the issues started in May 2023 saying “We don’t have the right machinery, we will have to find work-arounds.” Meaning they didn't have the right machinery and attachments from the start, (because they didn't really review the product) but that is not what they told me.
8. Throughout our ordeal, they also consistently belittled and dismissed my expertise, demonstrating a profound disrespect for my knowledge and experience in my own industry. I am a woman in business, and Novalink has no women in their board or leadership. I caution women in business and companies that employee women in direct manufacturing positions to further stay away from this organization based on my personal experience with these men. The way they felt comfortable speaking to me and treating me as a women in business, I never wish another woman has to experience.
9. Novalink heavily disregard all my attempts for communication and to fix the issues over the 4 months of down time, which was equally appalling. You agree to give Novalink business and if you’re not as big as their other clients they likely will toss you to the curb like trash, this was my experience with them at least. Novalink ignored my repeated attempts to address urgent issues, for about three weeks straight, exacerbating the financial strain on my business and demonstrating a callous indifference to my plight. I have a phone log of over 30 calls that I made to Novalink that were ignored, I was also constantly told by the secretary that no one was available to speak to me, and I have over 20 emails and texts that were ignored as well.
10. The fallout from their actions was extensive. My business was out of production for 12 months straight due to giving and waiting 4 months for Novalink to fix the issues, spending 3 months after they abruptly abandoned the work looking for a new manufacturing partner, and an additional 5 months getting set up with our new factory partner. Since this all happened during Q4 and the holiday season it was even longer to get set up somewhere else. Novalink actually had a clause in their contract that stated any termination of our agreement required a 180 day notice to either party. 6 months notice would give a client enough time to find a new manufacturer and set their business up for future success. However Novalink went against their own terms and gave me 0 days notice. Again, showing who these people are to their core. They will dispose of your business like nothing. As any business owner can imagine the 12 months of downtime and no inventory resulted in the loss of lucrative contracts for my business, missed opportunities for exposure and growth, cancelled marketing, and the alienation of thousands of loyal customers. I am now rebuilding all of this one year later. Despite providing Novalink with a generous four-month window to rectify the issues, they continued to prioritize their own interests over mine, refused to stop sewing holes in the product, ignored my pleas for quality workmanship and ultimately terminated our agreement, disregarding the devastating consequences for my business.
11. To add to their deceitful practices, their engineer initially sent me an email outlining all the faults in their work, and the changes he made to my product without my consent. However, Novalink now conveniently denies ever sending such communication, revealing their lack of integrity and honesty.
12. I initiated legal action against Novalink with the intentions and openness to find a fair settlement and grounds for both parties to move forward, since the damage done to my business was significant. I now am pursuing full damages, since Novalink refused to settle, and denies any damages or wrongdoing. (Shocking). Imagine you get into business with this factory, on an annual agreement expecting a certain amount of inventory, and they then terminate your agreement and toss your business to the curb, and then when you seek legal remedies they deny any wrong doing? They went as far as painting a picture that I was rushing them on their work and again finding reason to blame me instead of taking accountability. What type of manufacturer claims their work was bad because a brand new client rushed them and so therefore they compromised their own quality? It’s funny because my new factory told me they would not rush and they had procedures to follow and that they absolutely would not compromise their work quality. Again my new factory is doing amazing work and they have not sewed 1 hole in our products since the start. But from my experience with Novalink it was apparently they are willing to go against their own morals to get your business and willing to produce inventory at any quality just to suck you in. Their baseless accusations of my business rushing them on their work as a way to get out of any accountability demonstrates a complete lack of accountability on their part.
13. After confronting Novalink about the poor quality of the product and the deviations from our agreed specifications, they resorted to manipulative tactics, including gaslighting me, to deflect responsibility. They told me that I WANTED holes sewn into my product from the beginning. Really? They told me my business wasn’t at the level they needed, insinuating my business was too small now, and Jason Wolfe specifically claimed for that reason, since my business was so puny apparently, that that was the reason why I had all these issues. He tried to get under my skin. Would you ever tell a client who agreed to order 30,000 units from you that their business was too small? Jason claimed the holes in the sewing were not Novalink’s fault, it was MY fault somehow and what I wanted. Jason attempted to distort the narrative, falsely claiming that I had requested the flaws in the product from the outset. This gaslighting tactic only added insult to injury and caused personal distress. You
14. Through the end, Novalink attempted to shift blame onto me by citing the absence of tech packs and specs as a reason for terminating our contract. As I mentioned earlier, I was introduced to a woman in house who was supposedly creating my tech pack in house. They specs I provided to their engineer from the start and over email, but the engineer constantly told me I was wrong. They also never gave me the chance to present them with an update tech pack and specs and never once brought this up before terminating. It’s clear that Novalink knew what they did, they were looking for a way out of the contract (when they realized I would stand my ground and not accept their shoddy quality) and when issues arose Novalink conveniently attempted to lay the blame for termination on me. They blamed the reason for terminating our agreement was due to the lack of tech packs, despite having agreed to the work without issue from the outset. Again now you might be thinking why would they sew holes into your product and why would they claim any client wants holes sewn in their product? Why could they not just stop sewing the holes? Guess we'll have to take this to trail to get Novalink to answer those questions infront of a Jury. If you're reading this and thinking isn't it common sense that a brand wouldn't want holes sewn into their product, well let me tell you that Novalink lacks common sense then.

Dealing with Novalink in Brownsville Texas was a costly error that nearly cost me my entire business that I have spent the last 5 years building. I am getting back on my feet now with a wonderful new manufacturer and that is really what has given me the strength to write this review online. Novalink's abysmal conduct, marked by complete incompetence, dishonesty, and disrespect, renders them wholly unsuitable for any reputable business relationship. Please spare yourself the experience of agony, misery, and loss with a ruthless corporation like this; and seek out a manufacturer that upholds principles of quality, honesty, reliability, respect, ethics, and accountability.

Ep 27: Marry Your Trees
Recap Masterlist
Your girl's back for more vain hope of enjoyable McElnoise. Hope you all had a good Thanksgiving Christmas New Year's Eve Valentine's Day Easter eclipse May 3rd!
Yeah, so, uh... it's been a minute. I got distracted by a lot of excellent media, by my own writing endeavors, by my work schedule, by vacations, by the many slings and arrows of life, etc. And I just couldn't muster up the energy most days to even think about finishing Petals. But I really miss doing these, and I miss reading people's responses to 'em, so here I am again to blow this joint and move on to a certain kingdom of crystals, where hopefully my attention won't be led further astray.
You Boys Have One More Shot To Make This Arc Worthwhile

• Recap covers Garyl "dying", the one funny joke in the episode (Maarvey's corpse sliding off the wagon), Justin embiggening the motorcycle, and Merle hitting the button. Griffin's a coward for not including the bit where he had Hurley take out multiple enemies at once and then mocked the idea of rolling for it.
• Marzak
• Immediately after the button's been hit, the ram horns on the front of the wagon fold out and the tailpipes rattle, and the whole thing turns into a rocket-propelled arrow. And I must admit to some confusion right away, because we've established since Chapter Six that the big button is supposed to fire a giant harpoon, and that was what was going to catch them up to Sloan. A massive power boost has never been mentioned before. I've gone back over all my relevant recaps for this arc and I can't see a thing about it. Either this is a massive long-term mistake on my part, or we're in retcon town from the jump; we'll see whether the harpoon gets used later and decide. I will quietly sit here and go stir-crazy over it as we wait.
• Regardless, Hurley's wagon catches up to Sloan's winged hovercraft thing, as does Taako's motorcycle. Just in time, too, as the finish line -- and cliff -- are finally in sight! I'm counting my blessings Griff can't toss anything else in here to prolong it, barring Sloan earthbending more cliff into existence. Hurley and Sloan are both laughing maniacally as they grind up against each other (make your own jokes), both too caught up in the fun of the race at this point.
• Travis asks if anyone remembers why they even need to beat Sloan in the first place. This is a great question to hear from one of your players ten hours into your professionally recorded story arc. We're reminded that according to Hurley, beating Sloan in the race will cause her to immediately give up the Gaia Sash after realizing she's not all-powerful, which I would say still seems a little flimsy based on what little we've seen of Sloan's personality, but... feh. It's the least of Petals' problems.
• Unfortunately for them, Sloan's starting to pull ahead again! After we establish that it's still in jumping distance, Taako opts to stow his wand, throw the emergency brake on his giant bike, and pull out... the Wand of Switcheroo. Remember that? It's the wand he got from Fantasy Costco way back in the first shopping segment -- in Episode 9 -- that causes the target to switch places with him. Griffin is delighted that he remembered at all, and since he fucks up Sloan's Constitution saving throw (the first time he's actually had to roll for something Sloan does, natch), it works. Justin takes Sloan's place in the hover-canoe thing, while Sloan gets sent to the halting motorbike and falls rapidly behind.
• You know what? Big props to Griffin for allowing this deviation from a planned solution, even as he seems surprised and confused about how to proceed with the showdown. Let's just hope he doesn't give me reason to rescind the props.
• Griffin: "And that was enough. You, on this sleek battlewagon, are fired through the air like an arrow, through-" Travis: "I jump onto the canoe. I wanna win too." Oh, we know.
• Taako casts Gust of Wind to keep Magnus away, which turns this bit into a wonderful little playground argument as Travis, Justin, and even Clint start suggesting ridiculous back-and-forth blows to win the race. I'm not going to transcribe the whole thing because it's rather long, but it's so refreshing to actually perk up and laugh a little at something in this stretch of episodes.
• And with that... Taako crosses the finish line! Race is over! The great weights lift from my spirit! I know once again what it is to live and love!
• Wuh oh. He is still hurtling toward the cliff at top speed! Griffin explains that he can't find the brake in this battlewagon, and- oh, never mind. He was just doing a bit. Taako's good. Might have been room for some hijinks with a quick escape scene, but I'll let it ride just to get the fuck away from these vehicles.
• Time for what I think might be the first of Griffin's much-ballyhooed self-composed soundtrack! There's a whimsical, Zelda town-esque horn theme playing through Taako's victory celebration. Sounds pretty good.
• Hi it's me, Terthelt, ten seconds later. It is distractingly Zelda-y. I'll try to keep paying attention.
• Our heroes are so absorbed in congratulating Taako (and in Magnus' case, himself) for the win that they almost miss Sloan riding up on the bike, looking deathly ill at her loss. She clutches her chest as giant bolts of lightning erupt from her back, striking the ground and sprouting more of those damn vines as she goes. She drives straight off the cliff -- prompting Griffin to give Hurley an ear-piercing "SLOAN, NO!" -- but a giant gust of wind blows everyone back as they rush to check...
• And Sloan manifests a gigantic tornado a few feet from the cliff's edge, surrounded by thousands of ravens. It's almost like this plan to defeat her made no sense, y'all!
• Travis/Magnus: "I turn to Hurley, uh, s- let me do my voice, ahehehem: 'So uuuh, how's the whole beating her and she'll give us the sash thing going?" MY HERO.
• A despondent Hurley takes off her mask, to the collective gasps of the audience. Magnus follows and takes off his own mask, proudly announcing himself to far fewer gasps. Trav's on a roll this episode, it's been so long since my last listen that I almost forgot how much fun he can be when he plays along.
• Clint: "And I take my mask off and say, 'And I'm Bruce Wayne!'" Griffin: "O-okay. You all hear, uh, 'oh, okay, Mr. Wayne. Cool." Taako: "I'm actually a mongoose. Meow!"
• Hurley straps back into her car, seemingly intent on driving into the tornado to save Sloan, but Magnus hops on and preempts her heroic sacrifice, followed shortly by Taako ("No adventure would be complete without Weasel Man!"). Everyone shares a somber laugh, and then collectively stare awkwardly at Merle until he agrees to get in too.
• We quickly see the wagon's damage repaired, even as the mile-wide tornado is presumably bearing down on everyone, but then it's time for the showdown. At which point Griffin forgets the word "rev" and laboriously tries to describe how Hurley is holding the gas and the brake at the same time to make the cool noises like in the movies. Someone get our baby boy to a home, the fog is already taking him.
• The brake is released, and the car flies forward, straight off the cliff and into the massive birb vortex. Inside waits an enormous pillar of tangled vines, at the top of which waits a partially encased Sloan, fully overtaken by the Gaia Sash. Clint cuts through the drama to make a very lame Wizard of Oz reference, and is then bullied not for the lameness of it, but for daring to reference something so OLD and OBSCURE as THE WIZARD OF OZ.
• Dare I hope for a decent final boss battle here? There hasn't been a really entertaining bit of combat in Balance since Rockport, and even that was arguable compared to the heights of Gerblins. I'd like to remain optimistic, but given the vague bit I know about how this arc is going to wrap up, that's easier said than done.
• Hurley is now screaming in obvious delight at being sucked into a tornado, which feels a bit tone-deaf when she's staring down her horribly brainwashed (ostensible) lover. The four gab a bit about what to do, since she just drove off the cliff with no plan, before settling on using the harpoon to get in close. So I guess I was just wrong about where the harpoon was and what it was for. Nuts.
• Taako makes a ranged attack roll of 18 to blast the harpoon out, and it strikes true and digs in near the top of the vines without impaling the stricken lesbian. After a bit of reeling in, the wagon crashes down just under the platform, and everyone clambers up to confront Sloan. Griffin compares her current state to Gundren Rockseeker after he donned the fire gauntlet, and I'm just... struck, for a moment, at how long it's been since I listened to those episodes. Everything felt so much simpler then. In the podcast, and in my life... And if I'd stuck to my original schedule, I'd have finished all of Balance up long before now...

Terthelt Takes A Break To Eat A Mint Brownie At 11 PM On A Work Night

• Everyone's stuck for ideas, so Magnus asks Hurley what they should do, since she actually knows Sloan. Hurley sadly remarks that she might never have really known her, which is an odd thing to say about someone clearly brainwashed and out of her mind, but alright.
• Clint, beaming: "I cast ZONE OF TRUTH!"
• The madman actually does it. Faced with the ambient truth telling field, Magnus rolls a 12 (failure), Hurley a 17 (success, though I'd sooner shove Griffin in a Zone of Truth myself just to make sure), Taako an undisclosed failed number, and Sloan a 14 (failure). Merle immediately asks Sloan how they can defeat/save her, to which whatever's possessing Sloan (via Griffin's rumbling monster voice filter) yammers out a generic villain monologue about its power being absolute. Magnus: "What about the power of love?" Merle: "What about Jesus?" Taako: "What ABOUT Jesus? Where is that guy?' Magnus: "We haven't seen him in a dog day!" Merle: "We could really use some help right now!"
• Griffin suddenly cuts into the bit to ask the trio to make -- take a shot now -- Dexterity saving throws. Trav rolls 15, Justin 10, and Clint a pitiful 8. On cue, Sloan lashes out a vicious vine and knocks everyone down for 9 HP each -- a blow which Hurley obviously avoids gracefully, without a roll.
• At last, we're rolling initiative! Like this is some kind of D&D game or some shit.
• Taako's up first, but not before Sloan pulls back her vine and sprouts up a giant vine body to do battle. They banter for a bit about why they're standing on vines and how many boss fights in video games take place on floating vine arenas (I guess?); when his head's back in the game, Taako talks with Hurley and confirms that the gang didn't get the chance to rest after the race, so their options are mostly depleted. He casts a basic fireball on the plant colossus, destroying its head and setting it ablaze for a whopping 66 fire damage (33 doubled, since plants are unique among all other life for their hatred of being on fire). And that... might have been his last spell! Oh dear.
• Up next, Merle casts Prayer of Healing to heal the whole party. Nothing fancy, just a smart move he rolls well for.
• Magnus waffles for a minute on what he should do, but ends up making an attempt to pull the malevolent flora open and save Sloan manually. Griffin asks for a Sleight of Hand check just to get a handhold on the vines, and ever the tactical genius roller, Trav gets a 17 the moment Griffin says he needs to beat 15. He follows it up with a 26 (19+7) for Strength, even! AND that counts as a crit for him! I'm at the edge of my seat here, folks. He succeeds in ripping the vines apart and exposing Sloan, and then opts to roll a 23 (16+7) to punch her lights out. After all of that, all he succeeds in doing is making her bleed and laugh.
• The booming voice filter on Sloan is really taking me out of it. Not that I was super in to begin with, but it is mildly irritating whenever Griffin sees the need to do a grand evil cackle.
• Now it's Sloan's turn, and the vines immediately slam shut around Magnus, trapping him in the cavity with Sloan. Engulfed in pitch darkness, our stalwart hero manages to parry the next nebulously-described attack, but still takes 26 points of damage. Outside, the colossus regrows its head and summons a rain cloud to put the fire out, before taking a big spiky swing at Merle and Taako for 18 damage each. Justin says "hachi machi" for the second time this episode. You know, I've always seen people quote that when Justin's knee deep in drama, but I guess I happened to never listen to any MBMBAMs where he does it. This is an astoundingly pointless observation because I can't think of anything more interesting to say about the plant monster, and Clint already beat me to an Audrey II joke.
• Hurley's turn! What shenanigans will the DMPC grace us with this time? She hops right off the edge of the arena (to audible confusion), but floats back up holding the battlewagon's arcane core, and -- with another signature annoying Hurley one-liner ("Ready to do some pruning?") -- smashes it on the ground in front of Taako. From it emerge a swarm of glowing blue flecks, which Taako's staff turns inside out to swallow up, filling him with a surge of never-before-seen power; practically, this just means his spell slots are all filled up again. Sure, alright. It sounds like something that breaks some rule or another, but it gets Taako back in the game, and I'm just grateful she didn't do a flying meteor dropkick into a reverse German suplex for 800 unrolled damage and a free ice cream.
• On cue, Taako's turn. Justin jokes about casting Zone of Truth on himself to guarantee his cries of victory will come true, but decides to just throw out another fireball. He gets a good roll total at 32 (multiplied into 64 damage), only for Griffin to play cute with his description of how powerful Taako feels, urging him to keep rolling D6s as the fireball gets bigger and bigger. Our bewildered wizard proceeds to roll another dozen times and ends up with a combined total of 160 damage when Griffin finally tells him he can stop, gleefully describing what amounts to the sun itself manifesting from Taako's staff and blasting down upon the colossus.
• Yeah, I don't know. It's a cool moment, I guess. It was just handed to Justin on a silver platter without him having to think of anything or make use of his mechanics, but it's narrated colorfully enough. Probably I'm just being a curmudgeon about combat again.
• The sun explosion scorches away almost every vine, exposing Sloan (and Magnus, hi Magnus) before she immediately gets back to it. This time she summons a barrier of black-and-white thorned vines, which Hurley identifies as an infamous plant both venomous and cursed. Hurley urgently calls a huddle at the edge of the platform, gives the gang a big hug, and... blasts them off the arena, activating their safety harnesses. This- this can't be the end of the fight, right? They didn't even finish a second turn! Taako is the only PC who got to move twice!
• As our heroes watch helplessly, Hurley glows with a brilliant white light and charges into the brambles, beautifully radiating the light through the entire vine arena and the tornado itself before the trio black out. And that would seem to be the end of her(ley).
• So... yeah. I guess that's it? I knew a big heroic sacrifice was incoming, but I expected to have... any buildup or impact whatsoever, for how much it gets talked about. I expect I'll have more to say about this in a minute, but I'll let it ride for now.
• Travis: "We did it! And not a life was lost! No cost to ourselves!" Justin: "Another W for the good guys!" Travis: "We're gonna get a plaque for this one for SURE." Clint: "Yay us!"
• Once they're all done commiserating their grief, Griff brings the trio back to consciousness in a pool of water in the Goldcliff city center. Also in the pool is Sloan, now rejuvenated, cradling the sickly Hurley as infection visibly travels up her body. Alright, so at least there's more to it before they get sent off. I truly expected it to just fade back on the two dead.
• Hurley weakly moaning "You're in troublllle!" as the Militia sirens get closer is kind of cute, tbh.
• Sloan/Griffin/Hurley/this dialogue format was a mistake: "'This whole time, I was looking for something more powerful than this FUCKING belt.' Um, and she looks down at Hurley, and she says, 'I'm such a fool.' And Hurley says, 'Yeah.'" Taako: "Don't you have any healing magics? You're a cleric for crying out loud!" Merle: "Me?" Sloan: "The venom of the silverpoint...................... There's nothing to be done." Justin?/Taako?: "Horseshit!"
• Sloan makes a whispered agreement with the dying Hurley, and implores the party to never let something like this happen again with the other artifacts. With that, and another dramatic musical sting, the duo... explode into cherry blossoms and sprout into a giant tree, leaving only vague suggestions of their figures gnarled into the base, and the Gaia Sash resting alongside their racing masks.
• BRB shaking and crying
• ;--;
• Listened to Scissor Sisters' "I Can't Decide" on repeated loop at 1.5x speed, I think I'm all better now
• Griffin Dougie McElroy, you've done it again. You've played with my heartstrings and sent off a legendary heroine with the kind of panache Hollywood wishes they had. I'm going to adopt a ram in Hurley's memory.
• Ahem. With all of that settled, and with the ad break music fading in, Magnus and Taako glance over the tree and elbow each other a little over who's going to pick up the sash. Justin/Taako: "I notice Magnus reaching for Railsplitter and I say, 'Don't even think about it.'"

Ad Break, In Which I Digress On Gay Characters And The Burying Thereof
So. Yes. The lesbians turned into trees. As I said at the top of the arc, I did know this moment would happen in vague terms, I just had no idea what the context or execution would be. This moment stirred up a good bit of controversy over the subject of "Bury Your Gays", probably amplified in specificity by the 2015-2016 controversy over dead lesbians in various recent TV shows, and even now it's still debated whether killing Hurley and Sloan off this way was a good decision.
Bury Your Gays is a real thing, and it is still a broad issue, even as the landscape for representation has gotten much wider since 2015. Major rep is more important than ever, and will be until we no longer face such intense and constant extermination efforts. That said, it's a term best applied to trends, not universally applicable to every time a character on the LGBTQ+ spectrum is killed off or otherwise sent away. Imagine how fucking dull stories with diverse casts would be if queer characters were invincible. I love writing and experiencing diverse stories; I also love writing and experiencing things dark and full of violence and death. Some crossover is to be expected. What matters is that the death in question suits the story and the character, and doesn't feel malicious or denigrating.
To that end, is Hurley and Sloan's treensformation a case of Bury Your Gays? I wouldn't say so, even putting it in context of late 2015 (where there were already way, way, WAY better choices for sapphic rep than a D&D podcast by three cishet guys). Griffin definitely thought this would be a beautiful and poignant sendoff, and contorted the whole arc to build up to it. To the extent that Hurley and Sloan are characters at all, it fits them just fine. I can see a version of it that even rings home emotionally. Fang and Vanille's ending in Final Fantasy XIII -- which I would wager is what Griffin pulled this scene from -- is both more resonant and way more problematic.
My problem with Hurley and Sloan's sendoff is that they weren't a thing. There's hardly a gay relationship here to get upset about ending. Even with my thickest sapphic shipper goggles on, outside of the very first time Hurley talked about Sloan (where there were some innuendos that went right over everyone's heads), almost nothing about the two indicates that they're more than friends. They barely interact before the big pseudo-romantic death scene. Again, even in late 2015 -- mere months after the legalization of gay marriage -- there was substantially better on offer across various mediums. Seeing Hurley and Sloan held up as trailblazers of Real Lesbian Rep rings even falser now that I've seen their story. I feel nothing for these characters.
If Hurley and Sloan meant a lot to you at the time, and if you were invested enough in them to feel hurt by how Griffin sent them off, I don't say this to demean you. I would be genuinely curious to hear your takes. But I went in with low expectations to meet, and I'd be lying if I didn't call this whole thing unreasonably thin gruel for the hype.
Ad Break Finite

• Oh right, this is a D&D podcast I'm writing about.
• As we fade back in, Taako approaches the Gaia Sash, only for the evil voice from earlier (without the filter, so it's just Griff's scratchy little guy voice) to appear in his head with promises of unimaginable power. Taako's into it, but does his good boy job and resists its influence, only to be met with a critical fail roll of 9! And thus is Goldcliff menaced forevermore by the elemental sorcerer-king known only as The Mongoose -- nah, just as he's sliding the sash around his body, Hurley and Sloan's voices pop in and bid him-
• WAIT THEY'RE STILL ALIVE IN THAT TREE? THEY'RE NOT GHOSTS OR FUSED OR ANYTHING, THEY SOUND TOTALLY LUCID AND FINE. THAT WHOLE DIGRESSION WAS FUCKING POINTLESS
• Hurley and Sloan's voices pop in and bid him to be stronger, allowing him another roll with advantage. This time he rolls even worse with a 3. Before Griffin can conjure up a third lesbian in an icicle to cheer him on harder, Magnus rolls 22 to punch Taako in the head and Merle also rolls 22 to steal the sash off his body. Just one more in a long string of consequence negation, but I'll allow it on the basis that it's really funny and I'm taking anything to laugh at in this arc like a drowning woman clinging to chunks of driftwood.
• Gaia Sash: "Oh, a- a nature cleric?! I should've come to you first! Come on man, put me on!" Merle: "Nobody ever thinks of Merle..." Gaia Sash: "There's no vine you'll never be able to not fuck! I'll give you sexual conquest over anything, whether you wanna fuck an onion, or..." Everyone: [laughter] Griffin: "But you've beaten this thing in a- a test of wisdom." Merle: "I don't need your help, pal!" Griffin, gut punched: "Fuckin' an onion?!" Merle: "To have sex with an onion!" If nothing else, I'm glad this arc managed a perfect bookending brick joke.
• With his dominance over nature confirmed, Merle drops the Gaia Sash into his fanny pack and zips it up. Hurley and Sloan congratulate them on solving the problem, and just as the Militia surround the pool, Captain Bane (remember when I thought he was going to be the villain?) shows up and defuses the situation. We cut to Bane's office, where he asks for a rundown of the story and what happened to Hurley (Taako: "Tree now."), as well as inquiring how they've resisted three of these artifacts (they just did).
• With that done and several terrible tree puns made, Bane makes a toast to Hurley, urging the trio to drink with him. Aggressively urging. We only have like six minutes left in this arc, but holy shit, is there still time for my guess -- based entirely on this ridiculously minor character's name -- to be right?
• The gang see through it immediately and Taako casts Charm Person, but while he fails against Bane's 19 roll, it's enough for him to sense that Bane is already being mind controlled. He abruptly glows red(?) and stands up, smashing Merle and Taako's glasses and chugging Magnus', immediately dropping dead as the same silverpoint vine poison that did Hurley in takes effect. Behind him manifests another humanoid figure -- one whose features are completely hidden by a bright red robe. Magnus tries to beat the shit out of it, but it's completely incorporeal. I've been waiting on these guys to show up! All I know is that they're the main antagonistic force, and I think I remember some vague osmosed things to do with Stolen Century, but it's been long enough since I absorbed any discussion that it's all hazy. Excited to see if they're worth a damn.
• In a booming, echoey whisper, the red-robed figure asks repeatedly, "ARE YOU AFRAID?" The trio only have banter and piss-taking in response, up until it extends its arm and holographically projects a series of faces: Gundren Rockseeker, Magic Brian, Jenkins (god how I miss you Jenkins), Sloan, and Bane. It rambles a bit about the true nature of man, and we get our first namedrop of the Hunger being the all-consuming threat (that, as I've said before, I do know about) before vanishing. Everyone small-talks for a solid minute about how spooky it was.
• Taako: "Guys, I think- I think- if I was getting the right message from that, I think we're gonna need to turn our attention to one VERY important question... Do you think there was any prize money for the race, is that something we need to check back in on?"
• Griffin obliges and reveals that Bane had two hitherto-unmentioned briefcases on his desk, labeled 1 and 2, respectively nabbed up by Taako and Merle. Inside, respectively: 3,000 and 1,500 gold pieces! Taako decides to split it three ways for 1,500 gold apiece, which is fair, but so unlike the boot-stealing, silverware-hoarding maniac I fell in love with in arcs prior. Character development?
• Magnus loots Bane's body and takes his badge, and Merle obtains a little black vial of silverpoint poison. And then... the small talk about the Red Robe plays again? The fuck? The entire last three minutes of audio just loops as the progress bar continues, before resuming as normal for the actual end of the episode. I had to check the transcript to make sure I didn't miss anything in that time. Guess the official MaxFun upload just broke in a weird and specific way.
• Speaking of MaxFun, Justin rings us out by celebrating the season's completion and taking jabs at the idea of Kickstarter and Patreon. Make of that finely-aged milk what you will, dear jerkers. I got nothin'. I'm tired. That's all she wrote.

Post-Episode
Mostly about as boring as the past few episodes. I've already said my piece on Sloan and Hurley writ large, but the fight to get to the infamous moment was both mid and ridiculously short (I know, I know: "the food here is terrible, and such small portions"). Miraculously, though, things did pick up significantly in the last ten minutes of the episode. The trio seemed reinvigorated on the banter and improv front once the tree scene was done, and there was more to make me smile and chuckle in that home stretch than in pretty much the whole arc. I even liked the Bane / Red Robe scene as an ominous story beat! It's weird to end a Petals episode feeling generally positive!
Petals to the Metal, In Review
I think the fact that I took a full year to slog through the arc, nearly half of that just being procrastination on the final episode, speaks more to my opinion of Petals than anything scathing I could write.
The tower climb, the heist, the race, the showdown... every individual chunk of this storyline was an endurance test. Griffin really let out the worst of his DMing tendencies here, between the railroading, the fake rolls or complete absence of rolls, the ceaseless rimming of his own special characters to the minimization of the players, etc. And through it all, there were so precious few jokes and bits that actually landed for me.
I thought Rockport had a few serious issues, but it was sterling compared to this mess. All I can really admire about it is the ambition and the fact that the guys all sounded like they were having a good time for most of it.
Comedy Ranking: Rockport > Gerblins > Moonlighting > Petals
Quality Ranking: Gerblins > Rockport > Petals > Moonlighting
Here's to Crystal Kingdom being at least a change of pace, even if from what I hear, it'll be a lot more serious. And here's to me not taking another six months to do the next episode, however busy I am.

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Orioles (20-11) @ Reds (16-15)

First Pitch: 6:10 PM at Great American Ball Park

Team	Starter	TV	Radio
Orioles	Cole Irvin (2-1, 3.49 ERA)	MASN	98 Rock
Reds	Hunter Greene (1-2, 3.63 ERA)	BSOH	WLW

MLB	Fangraphs	Reddit Stream	IRC Chat
Gameday	Game Graph	Live Comments	Libera: ##baseball

Line Score - Game Over

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	R	H	E	LOB
BAL	0	0	0	0	0	0	3	0	0	3	9	0	10
CIN	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	2	0	2

Box Score

CIN		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
DH	India	4	0	0	0	0	1	.212
SS	De La Cruz, E	4	0	2	0	0	1	.288
LF	Steer	3	0	0	0	0	2	.246
C	Stephenson, T	3	0	0	0	0	0	.221
1B	Encarnacion-Strand	3	0	0	0	0	0	.190
3B	Candelario	3	0	0	0	0	0	.188
2B	Espinal	3	0	0	0	0	0	.183
RF	Fraley	2	0	0	0	0	0	.283
PH	Maile	1	0	0	0	0	1	.159
RF	Martini	0	0	0	0	0	0	.184
CF	Fairchild	2	0	0	0	0	2	.185
PH	Benson	1	0	0	0	0	1	.204

CIN	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Greene, H	5.2	5	0	0	4	5	109-71	3.12
Cruz, F	0.1	0	0	0	0	1	6-4	4.50
Pagán	0.2	4	3	3	0	0	26-20	5.54
Wilson	0.1	0	0	0	0	1	3-3	3.86
Farmer, B	2.0	0	0	0	1	1	24-12	3.06

BAL		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
SS	Henderson	4	0	2	0	1	0	.279
C	Rutschman	4	1	1	1	1	0	.308
DH	O'Hearn	5	1	2	2	0	0	.307
1B	Mountcastle	5	0	2	0	0	2	.295
RF	Santander	4	0	0	0	0	0	.207
CF	Mullins	4	0	0	0	0	3	.204
3B	Westburg	3	0	0	0	1	1	.300
LF	Kjerstad	2	0	1	0	2	1	.222
LF	McKenna	0	0	0	0	0	0	.667
2B	Mateo	4	1	1	0	0	1	.267

BAL	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Irvin, C	6.1	2	0	0	0	4	72-50	2.86
Cano	0.2	0	0	0	0	0	3-2	2.16
Coulombe	1.0	0	0	0	0	1	15-9	2.77
Kimbrel	1.0	0	0	0	0	3	16-12	2.92

Scoring Plays

Inning	Event	Score
T7	Adley Rutschman doubles (5) on a line drive to center fielder Stuart Fairchild, deflected by right fielder Jake Fraley. Jorge Mateo scores.	0-1
T7	Ryan O'Hearn homers (5) on a fly ball to right center field. Adley Rutschman scores.	0-3

Highlights

Description	Length
Cole Irvin against the Reds	0:07
Bullpen availability for Cincinnati, May 3 vs Orioles	0:07
Bench availability for Cincinnati, May 3 vs Orioles	0:07
Fielding alignment for Cincinnati, May 3 vs Orioles	0:11
Breaking down Hunter Greene's pitches	0:04
Hunter Greene's outing against the Orioles	0:20
Ryan O'Hearn: Home Run Statcast Analysis	0:13
Breaking down Cole Irvin's pitches	0:04
Cole Irvin's outing against the Reds	0:22
Jake Fraley nabs Gunnar Henderson at second base	0:31
Ryan O'Hearn hits a single and is safe after review	0:36
Gunnar Henderson's smooth play	0:28
Baltimore Orioles announce 2024 Hall of Fame Class	1:04
Elly De La Cruz, Gunnar Henderson share a moment	0:18
Hunter Greene's fifth and final strikeout	0:08
Adley Rutschman's RBI double	0:23
Ryan O'Hearn's two-run home run	0:30
Hunter Greene's five strikeouts	1:16
Cole Irvin's fourth and final strikeout	0:07
Yennier Cano's outstanding play	0:10
Christian Encarnacion-Strand's diving play	0:11

Decisions

Winning Pitcher	Losing Pitcher	Save
Irvin, C (3-1, 2.86 ERA)	Pagán (2-2, 5.54 ERA)	Kimbrel (8 SV, 2.92 ERA)

Attendance	Weather	Wind
	67°F, Overcast	6 mph, In From RF

HP	1B	2B	3B
Mike Muchlinski	Jansen Visconti	Paul Clemons	Andy Fletcher

Game ended at 11:26 PM.
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Nick Offerman's "Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man’s Fundamentals for Delicious Living" is an enjoyable mix of autobiography, comedy, and practical advice from the actor who became famous for his role as Ron Swanson on the TV program "Parks and Recreation." Based on his experiences as an actor and a child from a tiny town in Illinois, Offerman writes in this book on love, work, and the meaning of life.
The prose of Offerman is always full of his characteristic warmth, wit, wisdom, and humor. From his humble beginnings as an actor in Chicago, he gives readers a glimpse inside his childhood and the lessons he's learned. Offerman discusses the value of workmanship, perseverance, and living a life of purpose and integrity via touching insights and hilarious stories.
"Paddle Your Own Canoe" stands out because of the unique way it combines philosophical reflections with practical instruction. Interspersed with amusing anecdotes and profound life reflections, Offerman provides readers with practical advice on woodworking, cooking, and outdoor living. The voice of David Letterman is captivating and genuine in all of his speeches, whether they be about the value of hard work, the pleasures of a perfectly cooked steak, or the significance of maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
If you're a lover of Offerman's writing or just want to read something lighthearted and wise, "Paddle Your Own Canoe" is a great pick. This book will motivate readers to enjoy life to the fullest with its combination of entertaining anecdotes, practical advice, and emotional insights.
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DISCLAIMER: this post will be heavy. We are dealing with themes of racism, neo-nazi imagery, sexism, homophobia, transphobia and things of that sort. It would be not explained in details, but i will link articles talking about it in lenght. Please be careful while browsing!
Hello again people of Hobbydrama. This time my introduction will be brief since the post will probably be very long, just wanted to say: thank you for sticking with me. Remember to read the disclaimer and also be aware that this post might contain spoilers, particularly for Life Is Strange 1 and 3!
What the hell is Life Is Strange?
“Ready for the mosh pit, shaka brah”
Life Is Strange is a series of adventure games published by Square Enix’s External Studios. Created by Dontnod Entertainment, the series debuted with its first installment which was released in five episodes throughout 2015 on PS3, PS4, XBOX 360, PC, iOS and Android. It also recived a remastered version for the Nintendo Switch in 2021. Which was…not very good tbh, but we don’t talk about that. The story of the first game revolves around Max Caulfield, a girl who discovers that she has the ability to rewind time at any moment, causing each of her choices to make events unfold differently. After predicting the arrival of a giant storm, Max will have to use her powers to try to save her city, Arcadia Bay. She starts this by saving her former best friend (and future love interest) Chloe Price by dying in a bathroom stall. Since that, the plot will also focus on the search of Rachel Amber, a girl who misteriously disappeared without leaving trace. The player’s actions will affect the game’s story, which can be rewritten once they are able to rewind time. The introduction of the possibility of rewinding time allows to go back and do any action differently from the one first done in certain narrative checkpoints. This structure also offers a polarity system: choices made modify and influence the story through short- or long-term consequences. I mean, technically is not really like that because the game has only two possible endings and the choices you make can’t change it, but they affect the way other characters see you and interact with you. Dialogue scenes can also be rewound by choosing a different response option. Once an event is restored the previously provided data can also be used in the future: for example objects found in the future will be preserved after rewinding time. This, as you can imagine, offers a lot of possibilities for puzzle mechanics and things of that sort.
The game was a massive success, winning a shiton of awards in the following years and gaining an immense fanbase. This was due to its emotionally raw plot dealing with themes such as depression and suicide, bullying, fear of abandonment, LGBTQ+ representation, growing up and of course time shenaningans that subjects the main character to an unbelivable amount of trauma! Yay! Jokes aside, the game was so succesfull that it spawned an entire franchise: a prequel with Chloe Price as a protagonist came out in 2017 and a comic spin-off) was published in 2018.
Also: Life Is Strange 2 and Life Is Strange 3 were made, but they are different stories with totally different characters not related with Max and Chloe in any means, besides some minor easter eggs. For the context of this post, is important to know that when Lis became a franchise, they started to explore different stories with different characters: the only one thing in common is that in this world some people have some kinds of superpowers for…reasons that are never really fully explained. Max had time-rewind, it’s heavily implied in the prequel that Rachel Amber had some kind of fire powers or, in alternative, powers very similar to Max’s based on what some characters says about her, Sean’s brother has telekinesis and Alex has an “emotional aura” reading ability
There are also rumors going on about an Amazon Prime series adapting the story of the first game, but nothing has came out of it at the time of writing this.
With that being said, let’s move on.
The weird dynamics between Dontnod and Square Enix
Now, before we focus on the gist of the drama, it’s important to clarify one thing: Dontnod no longer holds any ownership of the Life Is Strange franchise and doesn’t work on the series anymore, only SquareEnix and Deck Nine are in charge now. To explain why this happened we need to go on a tangent here.
Development of the first Life Is Strange began in April 2013: the idea of developing it in episodes was due to creative, marketing and, above all, financial reasons. Mind you, at the time Dontnod was a little french indie game developing company. Their debut title was Remember Me), which at first they wanted it to be a PlayStation 3-exclusive role-playing game, but was dropped by publisher Sony Interactive Entertainment in 2011 on account of cuts in funding. It was presented at Gamescom the same year to attract another publishing deal. The following year, Capcom Europe acquired the rights and reimagined it as an action-adventure game.
In 2013, Dontnod was the most subsidised studio with 600 000€ aid by the French agency Centre national du cinéma et de l’image animée (CNC), including aid for a new intellectual property project codenamed “What if?” (later retitled to Life is Strange to avoid confusion with the film of the same name.) for something like 200 000 euros. On 28 January 2014, Dontnod filed for rjudicial reorganisation, a form of receivership in France. The proceeding filing was discovered by Factornews and some media outlets like Polygon reported it as Dontnod filing for bankruptcy as a result of the poor sales of Remember Me. However, Dontnod responded to these reports explaining that they were in the process of “judicial reorganisation” to resize the company and denying bankruptcy..
In June 2014, Dontnod announced that they were working with Square Enix Europe on a new game, which was announced as Life Is Strange that year and released in 2015 over the course of five instalments, like i said earlier. The critical and commercial success of Life Is Strange caused Dontnod to be solicited by publishers, whereas they previously had to pursue publishers themselves. Is also important to note that Life Is Strange received attention for the choice to include a female protagonist in the game. Before signing the collaboration with Square Enix, Dontnod had in fact encountered distrust from the curators of the project, who had attempted to insert a male protagonist in Max’s place. Baiscally, Square Enix was the only company that was willing to publish them without questioning the gender of the main character. Remember this, because it will be important later.
Following the release and success of the first Life is Strange, publisher Square Enix chose American developer Deck Nine to develop a prequel game focusing on the life of Chloe Price, while the Dontnod team began developing a direct sequel. Development on the prequel began in 2016 with assistance from Square Enix’ London Studios. Ashly Burch, who voiced Chloe in Life Is Strange, was replaced by Rhianna DeVries due to the SAG-AFTRA strike. However, Burch and Hannah Telle (Max’s VA) both reprised their roles for the bonus episode “Farewell.” The script for the game was over 1,500 pages, written by lead writer Zak Garriss and a writers’ room. Remember this name because it will come up again.
Prior to its official announcement, images had leaked online indicating that a prequel to Life Is Strange was in development. Finally, Square Enix revealed Life Is Strange: Before the Storm on 11 June during Microsoft’s E3 2017 presentation. At that time, Dontnod had declared that prospective follow-ups to Life Is Strange would feature new characters and locations to the original, with the developers feeling that Max and Chloe’s story had run its course over the first two games. Game co-director Raoul Barbet explained that

“It’s a question we asked ourselves at the beginning. Is it Max and Chloe, Arcadia Bay? No, it’s about everyday characters, relatable characters with stories you can involve yourself in, because it reflects your own experiences. With some supernatural stuff on the top.”

Michel Koch added that

“everyone loved Max, Chloe, Rachel. But their story…it’s done. We have nothing more to tell. We don’t want to. Other people will do it, and it’s okay. But for us, we have nothing more to do. Take them and do whatever you want.”

You can read the full interview here
However this would turn out to not be entirely true follwing recent events, but let’s leave this information for later.
Development on Life Is Strange 2 began in early 2016 as the first game shipped its physical edition. Michel Koch and Raoul Barbet returned to direct the sequel, with Christian Divine and Jean-Luc Cano reprising their roles as co-writers.. The game, despite its very heavy advertising campaign, recived a mixed reception from the audience if not downright negative. The main criticism, besides problems with the writing, the characters and the story, was that people…simply didn’t really care about a new cast, to be honest. Particularly when they are not written as good as the character from the first game. They would have much preferred a sequel with Max and Chloe. Keep this also in mind, because it will be important in a bit.
At the same time, Deck Nine began working on True Colors after completing Before the Storm in 2017. You can probably notice that for this new chapter they decided to return to an episodic format (Life Is Strange Before The Storm was released all in once, for context I was wrong, it was relased episodically, the difference is that there was a "complete season" version earlier than the first game! It was also the first Lis game to contain a DLC), just like the first game and Lis 2, both made by Dontnod.
Now, it’s also important to specify that Before The Storm was also recived lukewarmly, mainly because the plot felt rushed and a lot of very important lore bits of the first game weren’t even addressed, like how the fuck Rachel ended up in the dark room. You know…it was just the main reasons people were exited to play the prequel in the first place.
For context, in Lis 1 there are many moments where it is hinted that Rachel tried to deceive and manipulate Chloe, all so she could escape Arcadia Bay without her. In short: Rachel is not depicted as a good person in this game. There is even an entire section where Max finds out that Rachel was cheating on Chloe with her drug dealer. People were intrigued by this and wanted to know what Rachel’s deal was: was she a good person? Was she evil? How did she die? Did she also had powers? Did she caused the tornado? Is she the tornado? Did she passed down her powers to Max?
When the prequel was announced everyone went ballistic. Are we finally going to play as her? Well, no. Instead we got a story centered around Chloe (which we already knew well thanks to the first game), no powers, weird gameplay based on literally insulting npcs and very little of Rachel. Additionally she was depicted as a strangely different character, way more nicer than the first game made by the original developers probably intended. Her entire affair with the drug dealer was…simply not mentioned at all despite being a crucial point to the lore? Plus we got this post credits scene that literally explained nothing and in fact raised even more questions that would never be answered. Thanks!
Back to the point: when Life Is Strange 3 came out it was recived equally lukewarmly in some points. (clarification needed: it was COMMERCIALLY recived better than Lis 1 and 2, it won a shiton of awards too. I'm talking mainly about a section of the fanbase. Obviously there were also people who liked it, however the point is another here.) Many people pointed out that it’s so similar to the first game in terms or plot, general vibe and characters that it feels almost like a blatant copy. The protagonist is a socially awkard, introverted nerdy bisexual girl with a loudmouth, reckless, secretly nerdy lesbian punk-girl love interest and the plot concerns a disapperance of a person, that Alex and Steph need to investigate onto. Sounds familiar yet?
Also, people argued that Alex and Max share a very similar name, they make the literal same pose on the cover of their respective games and Steph was redesigned to look very similar to Chloe, hat and all..
For some people, it was pretty evident that after the lukewarm reception of BtS and Lis 2 and the complaints about it being too different from the established formula, Square Enix wanted to win back the love of former fans who liked the ideas of the original game. The problem is that they didn’t quite understood why the Dontond game had that impact on people, and borrowed from it only the most superficial aspects. The point is that people liked the first game because the characters were alive, with motivations, they were original and capable of making you really empathize with them. The plot was engaging and the mechanics were something new never seen in the video game industry (at that time). People liked the way the story was written and the way the game played, not necessarily the presence of Max and Chloe. People just wanted new protagonists that were written at least as good as them, basically.
So basically the way of thinking in some parts of the fandom was on the line of: rather than trying to poorly imitate Max and Chloe in a new game with an “original story” (do not steal) in a desperate attempt to regain the fans’ admiration, making a direct sequel to the first game with those characters would have been a better choice.
The comic spin-off with Max and Chloe wasn’t doing that good either. Well, it was a commercial success but the fanbase didn’t really liked it that much.. For context: it was not published by Dontnod or Square Enix, the people behind it were from Titan Comics. The series is set one year after the events of the original Life is Strange, and is a continuation to one of two of the games possible endings, known as the “Sacrifice Arcadia Bay” ending. It is written by Emma Vieceli, with interior art by Claudia Leonardi and coloring by Andrea Izzo. In fact the team behind it is entirely italian, which i find very cool as an italian myself. However, the problems were the same as said before: weird plot, character assasinations, introducing new powers for Max that make absolutely no sense, (now she is able to have “visions” of a different timeline and mess with the literal course of time without any real explanation or sensible motivation for WHY she is capable to do this all of a sudden) and in general they read a lot like a bad fanfiction.
Also i think it’s important to mention that the comics gave us a timeline in which Rachel is alive and she is in a romantic relationship with Chloe, while Max is their third wheel friend. I find this extremely hilarious so take this pic. It fucking kills me everytime.
So, to sum up all this mess before going on: Dontnod doesn’t own the intellectual property of Life Is Strange anymore. This happened after Lis 2, for reasons not yet disclosed. Square Enix and Deck Nine are now the heads of the entire franchise and they are not the best at managing it. In a desperate attempt to reach Dontnod success following the bad reception of BtS and Lis 2, they basically copied and pasted the entire plot of the first game (or at least borrowed a lot of context from it) for Lis 3, causing a sensible distaste in some parts of the fanbase.
The hidden hate imagery and the abuse scandal
Ok. Now we are quitting being funny and silly. This is the section were it starts to get REALLY dark REALLY suddenly. So please, keep in mind that i’m hovering a gigantic trigger warning over your head. All the links in this section can be extremely triggering for some people. Read the disclaimer, please. Are we good? Good. Now we can talk about the more recent news that literally throwed the fandom in a maniacal frenzy.
An article (GIGANTIC TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS ONE) was published by IGN the 5th April 2024, in which it’s described a very strange and disturbing episode that happened in the Deck Nine offices.
IMPORTANT INFO SINCE SOME PEOPLE WERE CONFUSED: I report the article as faithfully as possible given that in its entirety it could be considered uncomfortable by some people. Please be aware that I have copy pasted parts. This is not to plagiarize, I'm not saying that the contents of this article or the points of this speech are my own words. Keep in mind that it is only to give everyone a fair perspective, especially for people who may not like the mentions of certain things in the original article. However excuse me, i should have clarified this earlier. Thanks for everyone that spoke on this.
To put it simply since the article is very long, during the development of the fourth Life Is Strange game near the end of 2022, a few developers stumbled upon hate symbols hidden in the textures. They initially noticed a reference to the number 88, but they simply tought it was an unfortunate coincidence. It was just a number, right? Maybe their boss didn’t knew the implications of it. But then they quickly started to find more problematic and inequivocable signs, such as references to a racist meme, the number 18, and the Hagal rune.. It was definetly not a mistake: someone was putting those simbols there on purpose.
The weirdest thing is that weeks went by, then months, and management remained strangely silent about this. The incriminated assets remained in the game and people started to get really nervous for obvious reasons. At the end, they removed the symbols but the culprit was never discovered. Again, very strange. The company was behaving almost as if they were trying to defend however was behind this attack. This issue however, literally opened the fucking Pandora’s box.
According to current and former employees across several departments, most of whom have chosen to remain anonymus, Deck Nine’s management has caused a very toxic work culture. They claim the C-suite has protected multiple abusive leaders, encouraged crunch, and allowed bullying of individuals advocating internally for more authentic representation in Life Is Strange. Yeah, you heard that right.
Square Enix in particular was another whole can of worms: the employees said that the company was way too “defensive” of the script of True Colors. In the sense that they seemed oddly reluctant or outright hostile to the diverse themes and ideas that Life Is Strange has always explored. For instance, multiple people recalled an incident during True Colors development where Square Enix told multiple developers they didn’t want Life Is Strange to be thought of as the “gay game.” Which…you know, it’s very weird coming from a franchise that, when under Dontnod management, was always pretty open about its bisexual protagonists.
Well, theoretically Max and Sean are driven entirely by the choice of the player, so they are “playersexual”. You can choose what gender to romance in both games, in theory. However, Max is way more implied to be canonically bi or at least to have a crush on Chloe indipendetly by your choice in the original game, while Sean is more “open” in that sense. However, the main point is not really that. Is that Lis as a franchise always explored queer themes, so this kind of reaction by Square Enix is pretty odd. They knew what they were working with, right? Mallory Littleton, a narrative designer who worked on Life Is Strange under Deck Nine, even said that

”There’s a lot of press out there praising True Colors for having the first bisexual lead in a Life Is Strange game, even if in our press guides from Square Enix, all the way up until review copies were out, we were not to say anything about Alex’s sexuality, period, at all. And then they did the advance copies, and all of these reviews came out saying how amazing it was to finally see an explicitly bi protagonist, and after that, Square was like, just kidding, Alex is absolutely, canonically, 100% bisexual.”

Additionally, multiple sources gave the impression that Deck Nine’s relationship with Square Enix for Life Is Strange was one of money convenience rather than a deep appreciation for the series. Square Enix liked that Deck Nine was willing to do the game for a lower budget than other studios, while Deck Nine needed a good IP, so the deal was born solely for economical convenience However, many developers said that the people in charge of Deck Nine seemed seriously unprepared for dealing with a game with “serious” themes, especially when it came to thoughtful portrayals of diverse individuals. And this is when the real shit started. I won’t go into much detail (read the article if you are curious) but people reported a SHITON of accounts of sexual harassment, bullying and transphobia.
Remember Zack Garris? Well, sources say that he began forming close relationships with a number of younger women, often in situations where he had some mentorship or power over them. He was basically love bombing them, staying late at the studio talking to them, inviting them to lunch, dinner, movies or even to his house. He would also instigate personal conversations and text some of this women after work hours about personal topics. If you want more info about his (frankly disgusting) shenaningans, once again read the article.
It doesn’t stop here however.
In short: nobody, male or female, was able to tell him “no” when he crossed personal boundaries due to his status. This feeling only increased over time, with several people reporting incidents of him lashing out against those who disagreed with his decisions. This was especially true with people fighting for more sensitive portrayals of diverse characters. A woman named Tate Littleton, for instance, recalled being formally reprimanded for criticizing Garriss’ reluctance to allow women in his scripts to express anger. Basically he didn’t think representation mattered because “he didn’t necessarily identify with every white man protagonist, and so other people shouldn’t identify with characters because they look the same.”
The main episode that made this entire thing knew in the first place was the removal of a transgender character from True Colors that took place very late in development. Which, again, sounds really unusual considering the type of media Lis has always been. Additionally, two anonymous employees declared that in 2020 Garriss called BLM a hate group when the team at Deck Nine wanted to post something for the protests that were happening in America. In another example he fought weirdly hard for a twist on True Colors’ final choice that a number of writers pointed out included a problematic portrayal of migrant workers (it eventually was removed, so at least we have that i guess). He would also go daily on rants about how everyone was being “too political”. There was also another instance of a scene Garriss wrote for True Colors that the writers felt they had to fight him excessively to change. For those who don’t know, in the final script of True Colors the main character Alex is taken into the woods by Jed, who she view as a friend at this point of the story. He betrays her, shooting her and missing, causing her to fall into an abandoned mine shaft. However, in Garriss’ original version, Jed spikes her drink at a bar and takes her out to the woods for an attempted murder. When they saw this version of the scene, a number of people pushed back, arguing that the scene would unintentionally cause associations with date rape. Multiple individuals had to fight extensively with Garriss about this scene before it was eventually changed.
Additionally, Garris distanced himself from his team of writers. He and another lead would make most of the story decisions, rewriting work from other writers without allowing them the opportunity to give feedback, even on stories centering marginalized characters. Toward the end of True Colors development, Deck Nine implemented a new, anonymous performance evaluation tool: this is what caused all of this to surface recently, mind you, we would have never known if it wasn’t for this. Some time time later, Garriss quit the team voluntarily. But this wasn’t the end: True Colors launched to critical acclaim, and following the wave of its commercial success, Deck Nine parared immediatly the development of another Lis game. But it was struggling with one plot point apperently, and the leadership suggested to bring Garriss back to fix it. As you can probably imagined, the narrative team went insane. Everyone begged them not to bring him back in a series of meetings, messages, emails, everything. HR was even involved at some point and they even suggested that Deck Nine would be legally liable for Garriss’ behavior if they invited him back after the shiton of reports. When the company CEO and CFO persisted in arguing that they needed Garriss, multiple writers handed in resignations. Finally, management relented and the man did not return.
You probably get the vibe at this point. It was a mess. However, Garris later tried to defend himself against the accusations, but he was ultimately never called back again. At least not officially. Because he then landed at Telltale Games, which was working on a project in close partnership with Deck Nine at the time. Only a few months after his departure, several of those who had protested his return were told that a few narrative team members had been holding story breaking sessions at Garriss’ home. So…ok i guess?
However, this is not even the main tea. Remember when i said that Dontnod abandoned the franchise after the second chapter and it was never clarified why? Well, it’s theorized that the main reason why they went away it’s because Square Enix wasn’t willing to make them publish what they wanted in Life Is Strange. Which is incredibly sad and ironic considering the development issues the first game had. The main proof people point over this is another game made by Dontnod in 2020 called “Tell Me Why”, which stars a trans male protagonists and is objectively very similar to a Lis game without being really a Lis game. The main character has supernatural powers, the gameplay is identical, the story has a very similar vibe, you get the gist. The analogies were…a little bit too close for some people. Now, it’s important to remember that this are only speculations and nothing is being officially confirmed, but judging by the time coincidence and what surfaced recently, some people started to think that Dontnod published this game indipendently because Deck Nine and Square Enix didn’t want the main character to be trans. Which honestly kinda makes sense. However, another thing happened that fueled the speculations even more: Dontnod has recently annuced their new game, “Lost Records”, which they directly called a “spiritual successor to Life Is Strange”. They even stated that in this game they will insert ideas that they would have liked to explore with Max and Chloe in Lis sequels, which they can no longer produce since the franchise and those characters are no longer in their hands. Quoting from this article:

”When we started to work on the very first Life Is Strange a long time ago, we had no publishers. We didn’t know exactly where we would sell the game or…if we would even sell it. […] At this time, we were in need of publishing, and Square was interested in buying the games; they bought the rights for it, and they bought the franchise. […] But since they bought the franchise, our hands were tied. We couldn’t really work as we wanted on what paths the character should go, what kind of game we could make, and how we would like to make the franchise evolve.”

Which in retrospect many tought all of this sounded really weird. Didn’t they said years ago that their vision of the series was always to make stories with different characters and that Chloe and Max’s story was “over”? Many people tought this was a weird claim and so speculations started.
Many belive that the initial plan was to have at least a proper sequel to Lis 1 under their management, but the idea went to shit when Deck Nine and Square Enix acquired the IP for BtS, gaining effective ownership to the franchise and to Max and Chloe. Dontnod could not effectively use those character anymore and so they were obligated to create something new.
This theory gains credibility when we take into consideration the fact that recently a leak about a supposed sequel to the first game with Max and Chloe surfaced. Is important to note that in 2021 there was also another leak in which a person predicted very specific details about True Colors when it was still codenamed “Siren”, basically describing correctly the plot, the final title, the name of the protagonist and her powers. They even predicted the remastered of the first game! Additionally, at the end of the post they mention that the team was looking to make a Lis 1 follow up game with Max and Chloe, so the more recent leak was lining up almost scarily with the former. Another thing that adds fuel to the fire is the fact that the leaker mentioned to have saw an initial concept of this idea in 2022 during a survey in which they showed some future Lis content and apparently there was also an NDA involved. However, since this idea (mainly the bit when they describe Max being able to jump into different timelines) is very similar to what ended up happenning in the comics, some people tought it was simply a scrapped idea that they later reworked into the spin-off. Others instead think that the comics served to introduce us to this very concept and that they are still working on this supposed game. At this point in time we don’t know what the future olds, but it’s confirmed thanks to the article concerning the hate symbols scandal, that a fourth Lis game is currently being worked on. However, we don’t know if it’s that sequel the leaker mentioned or an entire different thing.
The aftermath
So…yeah. As you can probably guess, this situation is a total mess. The fandom is still trying to process what happened, and many are unsure whether to continue supporting the series or not, given everything that happened behind the scenes. It created a bit of a Blizzard situation, if you know what I’m talking about.
Personally, I’m a huge fan of the first Life Is Strange and it played a huge part in my growth. The other games didn’t fascinate me as much as the first tbh, but I loved Arcadia Bay and its world, Max and Chloe, the mystery, the characters, the story, the emotions. I’m not exaggerating when I say that it was the game that changed my life and helped me come to terms with my sexuality. Seeing two girls get together romantically like this in a video game really triggered something in me. It helped me understand that my feelings weren’t wrong. That I wasn’t alone. That i wasn’t broken. I know that probably sounds very cheesy and cringe, but it’s the way it is and I can’t help it. You can imagine what my reaction was when I witnessed this mess unfold irl. In a way I felt hurt. It’s strange to think that a saga that has done so much for me is being run by people who would like to see me dead. Or at the very least, people who were not that open as they liked to present themselves. And I don’t have an answer to the question “should we still support this video game?” Honestly I do not know. On one hand I feel sorry for all the creatives who desperately tried to make Life Is Strange something special despite everything, but at the same time… my god. What the fuck.
I can’t help but wonder how Life Is Strange could have been if it remained under Dontnod’s creative control: what kind of stories they would tell, what future they would invent for Max and Chloe, what adventures they would get into. But maybe it’s better this way. Those girls have grown up, they went trought a lot, and maybe we just need to learn to let them go. After all, isn’t it the entire point of the game? Learning to grow? As for me, I will continue to replay Life Is Strange 1 periodically, I will continue to be part of the frankly amazing community that is the Lis fandom, I will continue to read fanfictions and support fan creations, being it fangames or fanarts. Because they can never take it away from me. They can’t take it away from us. Never.
Thank you for reading this far, i hope it was interesting and that you learned something new.
That being said…quit with the sad bullshit! I want to use this section to shoutout a fellow creator that is currently working on a fan-made sequel of the first game: Life Is Strange After the Storm. If you like this kind of stuffs, make sure to follow him on twitter and to support the project!
Ok now i’m really over. See ya!
EDIT: added clarifictions in the True Colors section. Changed a link in there too (i realized i put the wrong thing). Corrected some BtS informations. Added a clarification in the article section. Edited some formatting and corrected grammatical errors. Added a link in the Hagal rune section. Uncensored the word "nazi", since a person wrote me in private to make me know that my post would not be put down now that it's approved. Rephrased some words to not make them sounds hostile, since a lot of people were getting on my troath for this. I would also like to clarify while i'm here that i don't hate Lis 3 in its entirety nor i'm alluding that Lis 1 has not recived any valid criticism, since people are putting words in my mouth that i did, in fact, not say.
ALSO IMPORTANT CAVIAT: you are not in the wrong if you liked True Colors! It's ok! The game has it's moments and can absolutely be good. In fact, i personally liked some of its plot points and ideas. A good amount of people recived it very well. In this post i'm talking about general negative fan reception to explain why many people are growing disillusioned with the series and to make clear why people criticize it more than the first game, i'm not saying your tastes are bad/you are in the wrong. It's ok to like different things.

TL:DR; Feels is an incredible album which really puts me in my feels lol. Incredible melodies, lyrics and songwriting throughout. I think at this point I can pretty confidently say Animal Collective is my favorite band. Heads up this review is very much through a personal lens rather than strictly focusing on the music.
Been a bit since my last update but life has gotten pretty busy for me. Was lucky enough to catch Avey on tour so took a little detour through his discography, might do a writeup on that at some point but safe to say I loved it all, Cows on Hourglass being my fav album and KC Yours being my fav song. I am such a huge fan of Avey, he’s easily become my biggest personal inspiration as an artist. I also just got engaged to the love of my life, which is pretty thematically fitting for where I’m currently at in the animal collective discography….. FEELS.
Wow, if you’ve been following me you know I’ve been super impressed with all of AnCo’s discography and just Called Sung Tongs one of my favorite albums. Then I listened to feels for the first time and was like holy shit this one might be my actual favorite album of all time. But like, idk, I felt kinda goofy saying that right after saying basically the same thing about sung tongs lol. So I sat with feels for a while. I’ve listened to it countless times now, and can definitively say it is my favorite Animal Collective work so far and tied with J Dilla’s donuts for my favorite album of all time. To be honest after ST I was a little apprehensive about the full band being back together, thinking that it might really just be that special mix of Avey and Panda from ST and Spirit that I liked more than the actual band. Holy shit I couldn’t have been more wrong.I thin Feels has Dave’s best song writing that I’ve heard from him. There’s such a sense of completeness to each track and the album as a whole. The album has some of the absolute best pacing I’ve ever heard (I’ve got a short attention span lol, it’s really hard for an album to keep me engaged the entire run time but Feels I don’t even think about listening / doing something else once it’s on). The band came in on a tour de force and while the album sounds more similar to the indie and folk rock that was popular when I was younger around that time, they were able to harness the approachability of this sound while still delivering all the AnCo weirdness, percussion, and textures that you could ask for. The perfect balance between the popiness and psychedelia. Where Feels really shines for me tho, is all Dave. The lyrics and melodies on Feels are the best I’ve ever heard. Every single song gets stuck in my head and so many of Dave’s lines resonate with me deeply here. I love how concrete these lyrics are, even if you don’t know exactly what they refer to you can so easily contextualize them into your life. (Well, at least I can, me and Avey have a lot in common and seem to have similar worldviews though so ymmv) While at the same time they still have that unique and free associative way of wording things that gives way to so much reflection and pondering. God I fucking love this album. Anyways, here’s a track by track review of this one because I love it so much: Did You See The Words? - 10/10 Just an absolutely perfect intro to the album, the build up and driving percussion is perfect and the dynamics play perfectly with the lyrics. Love the floaty synth during the verses paired with the pounding drum beat and Aveys soft vocals that just builds and builds until it becomes this beautiful mess. Yes, this mess is mine. Some of Avey’s best lyrics, imo. It’s one of those songs where I really don’t know what the full thing is about specifically, but all the imagery combines and works so beautiful together. Specifically I love the elderly couple lines, “did you see the words you wrote?” Section of course, and there’s something living in these lines, but my favorite line of the song is “Someone grabs a hold do you go “oo-oo-ooooh”? Should you go hoooooome? There’s something starting don’t know why”
Grass - 9.5/10 Giving this one 9.5 as I do think it’s slightly below the standout tracks (to me) on the album, but Grass is maybe my favorite to just throw on and jam out to. Again, the music and imagery is just amazing in this one, and the “pretty little femur” section is probably my favorite moment on the entire album absolutely loves how that leads into the “would you like to see me often” lines which are so sweet. Reminds me of when me and my girlfriend Fiance! Started dating in college and were a bit wilder and growing into adults together. Beautiful and fun asf song.
Flesh Canoe - 8.5/10 A welcome bit of chillness after POW POW NOW NOW lol. Flesh Canoe is an absolutely beautiful ballad, love the back and forth feeling the synths give as Avey’s vocals float on top in a wonderful stream of consciousness, and the backing vocals give depth. I also find this song really particularly interesting because of that interview where Dave said it’s about Avey. Not gonna approach that from a sexuality perspective because that’s not really my place to speak on. But I can really relate to the sense of co-dependency Avey might have felt then and the complicated emotions that come with that.
The Purple Bottle - 11/10 My absolute favorite on the album. Every part of it is perfect. I don’t know how popular of an opinion it is but I don’t actually really see this as a happy song at all. To me it more represents the manic and overly obsessive side of love that can actually hurt a relationship. I know when I was in high school in a long term relationship it had gotten to a place where I’d gotten into that mindset, and it lead to me being controlling, jealous and pushing her away eventually. Something I’ve learned from, not trying to expect or force some unrealized / unattainable idealistic archetype of what ‘love’ is, which I think the ‘crush love section’ touches on the ideals of. THAAAT BEING SAID, “I’ve got a big big big heartbeat yeah, I think you are the sweetest thing, I wear a coat of feelings and they are loud, I’ve been having good days, think we are the right age to start our own peculiar ways?” Is my absolute favorite lyric from Avey/AnCo and was basically running through my mind constantly in the month between me finding this album and proposing, I would sign it to her constantly lolol. Just such a beautiful beautiful line and so incredibly special to me now, I’m tearing up as I write this lol. So yeah my fav AnCo song for sure, didn’t even really get into the musical side much but it really speaks for its self. Avey and the band are genuises.
Bee’s - 8/10 Maybe the most sonically interesting track on the album? Really cool textures on this one and a really cool way to follow up Purple Bottle. Kinda ties into my whole manic/obssessive side of love thing. This song to me feels like the comedown from the high of purple bottle, learning to be more chill and take your time. Honestly don’t really totally know how the bees/beast fit into it tho, would love to hear anyones interpretations of this track! I have one friend who I’m trying to get into AnCo who likes the slow more ambient psychedelic side so this was the first track from feels I sent him, he loved it.
Banshee Beat - 10/10 Originally my favorite on the album when I first listened to it. I took a stroll out onto the Marshses around me, which are a truly unique and beautiful environment. I love hiking in forests, so moving to the coast was an adjustment, but the marshes have a certain vast emptiness and peacefulness that’s unique from what you get in the forest. Beautiful long sight-lines, but much of what you see is inaccessible due to being all water and mud. While you’re right there, the birds and crabs in the marsh are living in a different world you can only appreciate from the outside….. anyways yeah Banshee beat. I just felt like it matched the feeling of being out on the marsh, so much space all around you but you’re completely alone. The droning build employed here is beautiful and the dynamics are obviously incredible. That high school relationship I’d mentioned in my purple bottle write up ended with her leaving me for another guy, hearing this song takes me immediately back to that feeling right after we’d broken up. I was hanging with my friends but just felt absolutely hollow and this song captures that feeling perfectly. Honestly it really helped me reconcile some ‘inner-child’ type shit, where I had obviously gotten over that and moved on with my life. But never really fully took the time to dwell and reflect on it and how it influenced me going forward. I really can’t overstate the effect Aveys lyrics have had on me, he’s managed to put into words feelings I’ve had a hard time reflecting on, or given me new ways to look at so many things. I truly think that I am a better, more relaxed, emotionally aware and confident person since discovering Animal Collective. Greatest band of all time, it’s so much more than music, it’s vulnerability and a genuine celebration of everything the world has to offer, good and bad.
Daffy Duck - 7.5/10 “All I need is gooood advice” don’t we all lol. This kinda feels like the other side of banshee beat, taken some time and now reflecting on moving forward. Still not totally over it, “Fuck it, imma go live on a farm”, but reflecting on what’s really important to you. This is my least favorite on the album even tho it’s still really good. Just doesn’t quite grip me in the ways the others do.
Loch Raven - 9/10 I love repetitive mostly instrumental music, my favorite album is Donuts by J dilla lol and I’m a huge fan of producers like him, nujabes, Knxwledge, the avalanches, and other sample based repetitive instrumentals, so this song just hits all of the right notes for me. Yes there’s vocals but they’re so light and floaty they’re more of a texture. As I write this this is my first time actually looking at the lyrics… they’re a little creepy lolol, not what I expected. Kinda plays off that manic obsessive idea that I think a lot of this album is reflecting on. I just love this loop so much.
Turn Into Something - 10.5/10 okay I said pretty confidently purple bottle was my favorite but I forgot Turn Into Something exists. I don’t even have a long personal writeup for this one like banshee and purple I just love this song so much. Absolutely love the melody and instrumentation, the bounciness of it, just humming with energy into the low-key “that should turn into something” and I just absolutely love that notion. Things don’t just happen, they’re a result of everything before them, and everything is constantly changing. It’s a very optimistic song to me and one of the things I love about animal collective, helping me cut through my own cynicism (not that cynicism is entirely bad) and have a more positive outlook on the world. Then the transition into panda’s Outro which is just a beautiful end to this album. Perfect track, perfect ideas to end on. Perfect Album. Feels is incredible
I also listened to People EP which was fuckin Great, people and tikwid are both amazing tracks. Finally to round out this group of albums I listened to Panda Bears’ Person Pitch after reading a comment about the influence that had on the band going forward into Strawberry Jam. Overall, really good album but didn't hit as hard for as it seems to for others. Funny after I talked about how much I love repetitive sample based music, but to be honest panda's melodies just don't hit for me in the same way avey's do and I don't love the beach boys esque vocal harmonies, finally I wish the percussion played a bit more prominent role. Now that I've come off as a total hater lol it is an awesome album still. The light floaty atmosphere makes it amazing smoke sesh music (my favorite kind of music lolol) and the there's some top notch sampling and layering on here. My fav tracks being take pills, bros, good girl / carrots, and Ponytail which is my favorite. Really good album but not as engaging as AnCo's work, which is the same way I felt about avey’s solo work generally. Really good but not as engaging as when they’re together. There is some serious magic in the combination of Avey and Panda, and I really hope to catch Animal Collective live sometime! Tier List So far:Unrakable: Danse Sometimes it’s the only album I wanna listen to, a lot of the time I don’t wanna listen to it lol. S: Sung Tongs & Feels - I would probably still say sung tongs is my favorite AnCo album tbh just because feels is so emotionally intense. Feels I think is a better album overall tho
A+: Spirit - Still love this one a ton just love the other two a bit more
A: Prospect Hummer, Strawberry Jam, MPP, People EP - Might do a writeup for SJ when I come back to it, probably won’t for MPP. Was a long time MPP Only fan before doing this and while I still adore it I definitely prefer other albums more. Actually just listened back to this one with a friend getting into them and was low-key a little underwhelmed coming back to it lol.
A-: Campfire Songs
B: Ark/HCTI
C: Hollinndagain - No hate to hollinndagain, still a good album and interesting listen just my personal least favorite album of their’s I’ve heard and one I don’t go back to much.
Probably the last longer writeup I’ll do for a bit until I get to Centipede HZ which I’m really stoked for. Expect a smaller post with my thoughts on revisiting Strawberry jam and hearing Fall be Kind ep for the first time. If there’s any projects you’re specifically interested in hearing from me on let me know because after the centipede HZ one I’ll probably stop this “series” unless an album particularly inspires me to write about it. Finally thanks to everyone who's read and replied to these and the awesome community here on this sub where I've had and read tons of great discussions about this awesome band and their world! Y'all are all so chill and insightful and a big part of why I love AnCo!

Athletics @ Orioles - Fri, Apr 26

Game Status: Final - Score: 3-2 Athletics

Links & Info

• MLB Gameday
• Game Graphs
• Savant Gamefeed

	Athletics Batters	AB	R	H	RBI	BB	K	LOB	AVG	OBP	SLG
1	Ruiz, E - LF	3	0	0	0	0	1	1	.269	.355	.615
	b-Noda - 1B	2	0	0	0	0	0	3	.153	.274	.236
2	Nevin - 3B	5	0	1	0	0	1	1	.279	.343	.361
3	Langeliers - C	5	2	1	1	0	0	2	.173	.225	.407
4	Rooker - DH	4	1	2	1	1	1	1	.200	.290	.527
5	Bleday - CF	2	0	0	0	3	1	2	.231	.286	.341
6	Toro - 2B	4	0	1	1	0	2	2	.213	.267	.350
	Allen, N - SS	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.188	.246	.266
7	Hernaiz - 2B	3	0	0	0	1	2	0	.147	.231	.147
8	Butler, L - RF	3	0	1	0	1	1	0	.203	.313	.348
9	Schuemann - 2B	2	0	1	0	0	0	0	.133	.235	.333
	a-Brown, S - LF	2	0	0	0	0	2	4	.197	.247	.276
	Totals	35	3	7	3	6	11	16

Athletics
a-Struck out for Schuemann in the 7th. b-Flied out for Ruiz, E in the 8th.
BATTING: 2B: Butler, L (4, Coulombe); Rooker 2 (3, Kimbrel, Webb, J); Toro (3, Kimbrel). HR: Langeliers (6, 1st inning off Burnes, 0 on, 2 out). TB: Butler, L 2; Langeliers 4; Nevin; Rooker 4; Schuemann; Toro 2. RBI: Langeliers (12); Rooker (11); Toro (9). 2-out RBI: Rooker; Langeliers. Runners left in scoring position, 2 out: Brown, S; Toro; Noda 2; Bleday 2. Team RISP: 1-for-9. Team LOB: 9.

	Orioles Batters	AB	R	H	RBI	BB	K	LOB	AVG	OBP	SLG
1	Henderson - SS	5	1	0	0	0	2	2	.294	.357	.618
2	Rutschman - C	3	0	1	0	1	0	0	.327	.373	.416
3	O'Hearn - DH	4	0	2	1	0	0	1	.295	.368	.574
4	Santander - RF	4	0	1	0	0	0	4	.223	.295	.447
	McKenna - RF	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.000	.000	.000
5	Mountcastle - 1B	4	0	0	0	0	1	1	.301	.368	.458
6	Mullins - CF	4	1	1	1	0	0	1	.232	.286	.476
7	Westburg - 2B	4	0	0	0	0	0	0	.295	.354	.545
8	Cowser - LF	4	0	1	0	0	3	1	.328	.397	.703
9	Urías, R - 3B	3	0	0	0	0	1	1	.179	.200	.205
	a-Kjerstad - PH	1	0	0	0	0	0	1	.000	.000	.000
	Totals	36	2	6	2	1	7	12

Orioles
a-Grounded out for Urías, R in the 10th.
BATTING: 2B: Santander (7, Stripling). HR: Mullins (6, 4th inning off Stripling, 0 on, 1 out). TB: Cowser; Mullins 4; O'Hearn 2; Rutschman; Santander 2. RBI: Mullins (16); O'Hearn (9). 2-out RBI: O'Hearn. Runners left in scoring position, 2 out: Santander; Henderson; Mullins. Team RISP: 1-for-7. Team LOB: 6.
FIELDING: Pickoffs: Burnes (Bleday at 1st base).

Athletics Pitchers	IP	H	R	ER	BB	K	HR	P-S	ERA
Stripling	5.2	6	2	2	0	3	1	97-67	4.98
McFarland	0.1	0	0	0	0	0	0	3-2	4.35
Spence (W, 2-1)	3.0	0	0	0	1	2	0	43-28	3.38
Miller, M (S, 7)	1.0	0	0	0	0	2	0	13-10	1.46
Totals	10.0	6	2	2	1	7	1

Orioles Pitchers	IP	H	R	ER	BB	K	HR	P-S	ERA
Burnes	6.0	3	1	1	3	6	1	97-61	2.55
Coulombe (H, 5)	0.2	1	0	0	0	1	0	15-9	2.79
Cano (H, 5)	1.1	0	0	0	0	2	0	15-10	2.63
Kimbrel (BS, 2)	0.1	2	1	1	3	0	0	24-8	1.59
Akin	0.2	0	0	0	0	1	0	6-6	4.09
Webb, J (L, 0-1)	1.0	1	1	0	0	1	0	13-9	2.31
Totals	10.0	7	3	2	6	11	1

Game Info
Pitch timer violations: Akin (pitcher).
Pitches-strikes: Stripling 97-67; McFarland 3-2; Spence 43-28; Miller, M 13-10; Burnes 97-61; Coulombe 15-9; Cano 15-10; Kimbrel 24-8; Akin 6-6; Webb, J 13-9.
Groundouts-flyouts: Stripling 6-3; McFarland 1-0; Spence 5-1; Miller, M 1-0; Burnes 4-4; Coulombe 1-0; Cano 1-1; Kimbrel 0-0; Akin 0-0; Webb, J 2-0.
Batters faced: Stripling 23; McFarland 1; Spence 10; Miller, M 3; Burnes 23; Coulombe 3; Cano 4; Kimbrel 5; Akin 2; Webb, J 4.
Inherited runners-scored: McFarland 1-0; Cano 1-0; Akin 3-0.
Umpires: HP: John Libka. 1B: James Hoye. 2B: Rob Drake. 3B: Jonathan Parra.
Weather: 60 degrees, Clear.
Wind: 6 mph, Out To LF.
First pitch: 7:05 PM.
T: 3:00.
Att: 22,965.
Venue: Oriole Park at Camden Yards.
April 26, 2024

Inning	Scoring Play	Score
Top 1	Shea Langeliers homers (6) on a line drive to left center field.	1-0 OAK
Bottom 3	Ryan O'Hearn singles on a ground ball to center fielder JJ Bleday. Gunnar Henderson scores. Adley Rutschman to 3rd.	1-1
Bottom 4	Cedric Mullins homers (6) on a fly ball to right field.	2-1 BAL
Top 9	Abraham Toro doubles (3) on a line drive to right fielder Ryan McKenna. Brent Rooker scores. JJ Bleday to 3rd.	2-2
Top 10	Brent Rooker doubles (3) on a sharp line drive to left fielder Colton Cowser. Shea Langeliers scores.	3-2 OAK

Team	Highlight
BAL	Cedric Mullins' solo home run (6) (00:00:29)
BAL	Will Ashbaugh joins the broadcast (00:04:06)
BAL	A fan makes a nice barehanded grab on a foul ball (00:00:17)
BAL	Corbin Burns' six strikeout performance (00:00:55)
OAK	Abraham Toro's RBI double ties the game (00:00:28)
BAL	Orioles nab Bleday at the plate (00:00:29)
OAK	Ross Stripling's three strikeout start (00:00:32)
OAK	Ryan O'Hearn is safe at first base after a review (00:00:27)
OAK	Brent Rooker's go-ahead RBI double (00:00:27)
OAK	Mason Miller secures the A's win (00:00:24)

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10		R	H	E	LOB
Athletics	1	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	1	1		3	7	0	9
Orioles	0	0	1	1	0	0	0	0	0	0		2	6	0	6

Decisions

• Winner: Mitch Spence (2-1, 3.38)
• Loser: Jacob Webb (0-1, 2.31)
• Save: Mason Miller (7, 1.46)

Division Scoreboard

LAD 12 @ TOR 2 - Final
CHC 7 @ BOS 1 - Final
TB 4 @ CWS 9 - Final
NYY 6 @ MIL 6 - Bottom 10, 2 Outs

No-Hitter Alert

T 6	R	H	E
Twins	4	9	0
Angels	0	0	1

Next Orioles Game: Sat, Apr 27, 04:05 PM EDT vs. Athletics
^{Last Updated: 04/26/2024 11:06:44 PM EDT}