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IN THE QUR'AN

THE CAVE

We are now firmly anchored in synchromysticism, and it is in this context that I notice other correspondences with the Qur'an.
I was still pondering the word "club" when a scene from an episode of The Simpsons piqued my curiosity. From there I discovered what I call a synchromystic correspondence between part of the Simpsons episode and the story of the companions of the cave described in Surah 18 of the Qur'an, The Cave.
From an entry point, if we use similarities as markers, the unfolding of the Simpsons scenes is almost in sync with the sequence of ayat in Surah 18 from the moment the young men entered the cave. I'll try to clarify this for you:

In the cave

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[17-18]; The young men entered the cave:

18:17 And [had you been present], you would see the sun when it rose, inclining away from their cave on the right, and when it set, passing away from them on the left, while they were [lying] within an open space thereof. That was from the signs of Allah. He whom Allah guides is the [rightly] guided, but he whom He leaves astray - never will you find for him a protecting guide.
18:18 And you would think them awake, while they were asleep. And We turned them to the right and to the left, while their dog stretched his forelegs at the entrance. If you had looked at them, you would have turned from them in flight and been filled by them with terror.

▶ The Simpsons - sun; Mr. Burns' turn to strike the ball.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[17-18]	The Simpsons - sun
18:17 "And [had you been present], you would see the sun when it rose, inclining away from their cave on the right, and when it set, passing away from them on the left,"	Note that in the first scene of the video the thrown ball is shown merging with the sun. Then the next ball has a deviated trajectory from left to right: "Oh, a cunning stratagem, sir. It's curving right toward the green, and it's... there."
18:17 "while they were [lying] within an open space thereof."	A 👁️‍🗨️ wide open space (clearing) between group of trees.
18:18 "And you would think them awake, while they were asleep."	A character suddenly loses consciousness, causing another character to be confused.
18:18 "And We turned them to the right and to the left,"	A character turning on himself (starting from his left) with a club in his hand. (⇢ read [q-l-b] below the table ⬇️)
18:18 "while their dog stretched his forelegs at the entrance."	👁️‍🗨️ Two parallel golf clubs on the ground, in the foreground in front of the clearing. (⇢ read [k-l-b] below the table ⬇️)
18:18 "If you had looked at them, you would have turned from them in flight and been filled by them with terror."	A character flees in haste at the sight of another lying on the ground.

[q-l-b]: Note that Homer turns through 360° with a club in his hands and the club itself turns on its axis in the air. In Ayah 18:18 the word used to express the action of turning something is "wanuqallibuhum" from the root q-l-b; wa[and]-nu[we]-qallibu[turned]-hum[them].
There is a 🔊 resemblance in sound between the consonants of the word club in English, c-l-b, and the root q-l-b in Arabic (the sound produced by the letter Qaf in Arabic is a kind of [k] pronounced further back in the throat).
---
[k-l-b]: Same idea as [q-l-b] here. In Ayah 18:18 the word used for "while their dog" is wakalbuhum; wa[and]-kalbu[dog]-hum[their]. Kalb from the root k-l-b.
The consonants of the word club in English, c-l-b, and the root k-l-b in Arabic are 🔊 very much alike in sound.
And the dog stretches forth its two forelegs, "dhira'ayhi", which is a declension of the word dhira' (cubit, from the elbow to the tip of the middle finger). Their shape could well be represented by golf clubs.

Delivery

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[19-20]; The companions of the cave are released and discuss their affair:

18:19 And similarly, We awakened them that they might question one another. Said a speaker from among them, "How long have you remained [here]?" They said, "We have remained a day or part of a day." They said, "Your Lord is most knowing of how long you remained. So send one of you with this silver coin of yours to the city and let him look to which is the best of food and bring you provision from it and let him be cautious. And let no one be aware of you.
18:20 Indeed, if they come to know of you, they will stone you or return you to their religion. And never would you succeed, then - ever."

▶ The Simpsons - city; Marge travels to a faraway city in search of a high-quality dress.
▶ The Simpsons - dollar; This time, Marge goes to Main Street and buys a high fashion dress.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[19-20]	The Simpsons - city
18:19 "[...] So send one of you with this silver coin of yours to the city"	A character going alone in a city...
18:19 "and let him look to which is the best of food*️⃣ and bring you provision from it"	"Miss? Do you have a Chanel suit or any other high-quality clothes?"
18:20 "[...] they will stone you"	A character stoned by a golf ball
18:20 "or return you to their religion."	"I'm sure he'd support your application for membership tonight." | "Bull honkey! I don't care about joining this stupid club." | "But does your wife?"

^*️⃣"azka ta'aman", literally "the purest food".

Time is money

Qur'an 18:19	The Simpsons - dollar
18:19 "And similarly, We awakened them that they might question one another. Said a speaker from among them*️⃣,"	Just as they are about to exit the house, the chatty character asks another one questions.
18:19 "How long have you remained [here]?"	"How much did it cost?"
18:19 "They said, "We have remained a day"	"A dollar. Let's go."
18:19 "or part of a day."	"With tax or without?" | "Without. Let me go."

^*️⃣"qâilun minhum", which is understood to mean "the talkative one among them".

Who's the Boss?

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:21; Dispute:

18:21 And similarly, We caused them to be found that they [who found them] would know that the promise of Allah is truth and that of the Hour there is no doubt. [That was] when they disputed among themselves about their affair and [then] said, "Construct over them a structure. Their Lord is most knowing about them." Said those who prevailed in the matter, "We will surely take [for ourselves] over them a masjid."

▶ The Simpsons - party; The Simpsons go to the reception.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:21	The Simpsons - party
18:21 "[...][That was] when they disputed among themselves about their affair"	Arguing characters
18:21 "and [then] said, "Construct over them a structure1️⃣. Their Lord is most knowing about them2️⃣.""	"I'm driving up to the main building. They've got valet3️⃣ parking tonight."
18:21 "Said those who prevailed in the matter, "We will surely take [for ourselves] over them a masjid4️⃣.""	The dominant character chooses that they should walk instead: "Stop the car. We're walking." Following that decision they find themselves in a situation 👁️‍🗨️ reminiscent of the faithful behind their imam in a masjid (a mosque).

^1️⃣In other translations "bun'yanan" is translated as "building".
^2️⃣"them" refers to the people of the cave. These people are described earlier in the surah as "young men of sound judgment" (fit'yatun). Fit'yatun is a declension of the word fatan. Fatan has another meaning, used later in the same surah, that of "servant/valet/slave" (lifatahu), remember that.
^3️⃣See 2️⃣ above, young man/valet/servant are definitions of the same word in surah 18.
^4️⃣I don't have a clear idea of what the sentence means. The term masjid means a station of prostration, it is used to refer to mosques for example because the faithful stop there to practice prayers composed of prostrations (sujud).

The Hour is close, in sound.

➔ Qur'an 18:21; The Hour is to be expected:

18:21 And similarly, We caused them to be found that they [who found them] would know that the promise of Allāh is truth and that of the Hour there is no doubt. [...]

▶ The Simpsons - party; Homer hurries to the building, expecting to be called sir:

For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene".

The word translated as "the-Hour" is as-sa'ah. In the ayah, the word is pronounced as-sa'a-ta, but when the word is isolated, the final '-ta' disappears to be replaced by a small breath that comes from the bottom of the throat.
The ' in as-sa'ah corresponds to the Arabic letter 'ayn. It is pronounced by the expulsion of the breath through the constriction of the middle part of the throat. It can sound like a guttural /.
The words sa'ah in Arabic and sir in English are 🔊 close in sound.

Back to fitness

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:22; Count:

18:22 They [i.e., people] will say there were three, the fourth of them being their dog; and they will say there were five, the sixth of them being their dog - guessing at the unseen; and they will say there were seven, and the eighth of them was their dog. Say, [O Muḥammad], "My Lord is most knowing of their number. None knows them except a few. So do not argue about them except with an obvious argument and do not inquire about them among [the speculators] from anyone."

[+] In addition to the normal continuation of the thread of ayat we're going to look back at ayat counting the beginning of the youths' story. These are ayat that we haven't covered yet:
➔ Qur'an 18:[13-16]; Beginning of the story:

18:13 It is We who relate to you, [O Muhammad], their story in truth. Indeed, they were youths who believed in their Lord, and We increased them in guidance.
18:14 And We made firm their hearts when they stood up and said, "Our Lord is the Lord of the heavens and the earth. Never will we invoke besides Him any deity. We would have certainly spoken, then, an excessive transgression.
18:15 These, our people, have taken besides Him deities. Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority? And who is more unjust than one who invents about Allah a lie?"
18:16 [The youths said to one another], "And when you have withdrawn from them and that which they worship other than Allah, retreat to the cave. Your Lord will spread out for you of His mercy and will prepare for you from your affair facility."

▶ The Simpsons - triangle; The Simpsons discuss what they are going to do at the reception.
▶ The Simpsons - highlight; High point of the argument.

Semantic comparisons

I based my comparisons on the vocabulary used in Ayah 18:22. Specifically, the three roots m-r-y, ẓ-h-r and f-t-y.

m-r-y

18:22 [...] So do not argue about them except with an obvious argument

The words used in Arabic translated as "to argue"/"argument" are tumari/mira'an from the root m-r-y. This root generates three main groups of ideas: [dispute/opposition/contestation], [hesitation/doubt], and [squeezing the maximum amount of milk out of a camel's udder]:

Qur'an 18:22 "So do not argue [tumari] about them"	The Simpsons - triangle
[dispute/opposition/contestation]	[opposition/contestation] "I'm going to regale everyone with my anecdote. You know, the one I tried to say on the radio? Who's going to bleep me this time?"
[squeezing the maximum amount of milk out of a camel's udder]	["milking" an old lady for her money] "I'm going to pose as an Italian count and get some old lady to leave me all her money."
[hesitation/doubt]	[hesitation/doubt] "I'm going to ask people if they know their servants' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first."

[+] A little clue led me to take a closer look at the ayat 18:[13-16] narrating the beginning of the story. I made an observation based on Marge's words, "No vulgarity. No mischief. No politics.":

Qur'an 18:[14-15]	The Simpsons - triangle "No vulgarity. No mischief. No politics."
18:14 "[...] And We made firm their hearts when they stood up and said, "Our Lord is the Lord of the heavens and the earth. Never will we invoke besides Him any deity. We would have certainly spoken, then, an excessive transgression." (⇢ read [shatatan] below the table ⬇️)	[vulgarity] "I'm going to regale everyone with my anecdote. You know, the one I tried to say on the radio? Who's going to bleep me this time?"
18:15 "These, our people, have taken besides Him deities. Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority?" (⇢ read [qawmuna] below the table ⬇️)	[politics] "I'm going to ask people if they know their servants' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first."
18:15 "Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority? And who is more unjust than one who invents about Allah a lie?"" (⇢ read [mis-chief] below the table ⬇️)	[mischief] "I'm going to pose as an Italian count and get some old lady to leave me all her money."

[shatatan] The young people's story and their conversations are said to be narrated "bil-haqqi" (in truth), i.e. as it happened. "shatatan", translated here as "an excessive transgression", is an informal word that is part of youth jargon, according to one explanation I heard. It's a very familiar way of saying "utter nonsense", "an ENORMOUS absurdity".
Perhaps a notch less vulgar than "(talk) sh!t" (or "bullsh#t") but 🔊 phonetically resembling it.
---
[qawmuna] "hâulâi" (These) is used to target a specific group of people. In this case "qawmuna" (our people). This is a statement about community affairs. Incidentally, "qawmuna" is 🔊 phonetically close to "common".
"bi-sultanin bayyinin" (with a clear authority) suggests a thinly veiled criticism of the political power. Indeed, the word sultanin can be translated as "compelling evidence" but also as "authority", "rule, dominion" or "sultan".
---
[mis-chief] I've repeated the sentence about authority here, because in this story, political authority conditions the religious situation of the people.
In my opinion, it's not just a statement about the people's misguidance, but a barely concealed accusation against their chief and their attachment to him. A pseudo "sultan" who is accused of inventing a baseless lie and thus being a source of wrongdoing and obscurantism.
[+] Another observation:

Qur'an 18:14	The Simpsons - triangle
18:14 "And We made firm their hearts*️⃣ when they stood up and said,"	Homer's group begins to walk, and as soon as Homer speaks, the "camera" shots show the growing cohesion of the group until they end up in a tight row. They speak collegially and the camera following their faces forms a triangle (the triangle is reputed to be the most stable form for a structure).

^*️⃣"rabatna 'ala qulubihim", literally "we tied over their hearts" meaning we've fortified their hearts to keep their composure. It also suggests that their hearts are tied to each other, forming a steady union.

ẓ-h-r

18:22 [...] except with an obvious argument

The word used in Arabic translated as "obvious" is ẓahiran, which means "manifest (whereas previously latent)". This word comes from the root ẓ-h-r which generates seemingly distant meanings from each other. It gives the nouns back (of the body) and midday (when the sun is high) and also the verb to manifest.
A study in French tries to dissect the origin of the polysemy of this root: Une étude de la racine ظهر √ẓhr (A study of the root ظهر √ẓhr) by Jean-Claude Rolland with the collaboration of Jean-Marc Guyetand. The official link is dead at the time I publish this post, fortunately I had made a backup.
I skip the technical explanations and (do my best to) translate the conclusion into English:

Conclusion
There is only one root ظهر √ẓhr, which results from the crossing of the etymons {ẓ,r} and {h,r}.
– By the etymon {ẓ,r}, this root comes under the matrix of the throat and neck. Its semanticism is mainly oriented towards the back perceived as the extension of the back part of the neck, the nape of the neck. The etymon {h,r} only comes in reinforcement in the items relating to the notions of brilliance, midday, appearing, etc.
– But as there is only one word ظَهْر ẓahr to designate both the back of bipeds and that of quadrupeds, the root ظهر √ẓhr comes, by enantiosemy, to express both what is in the back of some, therefore behind them, hidden, invisible, and what is on the backs of others, therefore above, salient, shining, uncovered, visible.
(July 2020)

Qur'an 18:22	The Simpsons - highlight
18:22 "[...] except with an obvious [ẓahiran] argument"	"You kids should thank your mother. Now that she's a better person we can see how awful we really are." (⇢ read [ẓahiran] below the table ⬇️)

[ẓahiran] It seems to me that all of these notions carried by the root ẓ-h-r have been assimilated in the form of a cartoon scene:

• Verticality: Homer's statement carries in itself the notions of the root ẓ-h-r. Something that has reached a (supposedly) high point ("Now that she's a better person") leads to the manifestation ("we can see") of something not observed ("how awful we really are.").
  
• Horizontality: Marge turns her back to Homer and the children, and the moment Homer's words hit her is emphasized by a play of light and shadow. Something emerged, the light grows on the front side until it stops at the boundary between front and back. And vice versa, when she finally turns back to Homer and the children. Plus, the dress clearly highlights the throat and neck.
  

f-t-y

18:22 [...] and do not inquire about them among [the speculators] from anyone.

The word used in Arabic translated as "to inquire" is tastafti. It is a verb formed from the root f-t-y which is declined in different meanings. From this root comes the word fatan which is used in this same surah (n°18) under its two definitions, "young men of sound judgment" (fit'yatun) and "servant/valet/slave" (lifatahu).

Qur'an 18:22	The Simpsons - triangle
18:22 "[...] and do not inquire1️⃣ about them2️⃣ among [the speculators] from anyone."	"I'm going to ask people if they know their servants3️⃣' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first." | "No! No! No! Not tonight!"

^1️⃣The word in arabic is "tastafti" from the root f-t-y.
^2️⃣"them" refers to "fityatun" (from f-t-y; young men).
^3️⃣see explanation above the table.

Tomorrow

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[23-24]; Tomorrow:

18:23 And never say of anything, "Indeed, I will do that tomorrow,"
18:24 Except [when adding], "If Allah wills." And remember your Lord when you forget [it] and say, "Perhaps my Lord will guide me to what is nearer than this to right conduct."

▶ The Simpsons - sir; Back to the "sir" scene.

Re-verse engineering

Homer Simpson:

For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene".

I think I can reconstruct some semblance of Homer's line by drawing on the two ayat above:

The Simpsons - sir	Qur'an 18:[23-24]
maybe someone will	18:24 Perhaps my Lord will
call me	18:23 "wala taqulanna" (And never say). "qul" means "say". An emphatic suffix is added to give the form "-qulanna"; that is phonetically close to qul-'ana' (ana = me, I) ~~> qul 'me' ~~> call me.
sir	? (⇢ read [?] below the table ⬇️)
without adding	18:24 Except [when adding]
"you're making	18:23 "Indeed, I will do
a scene"	18:23 that. "that" refers to "of anything" or more precisely to lishay'in; li[of]-shay'in[a thing]. I find that the /sh/ and /s/ sounds are often interchangeable in this kind of comparison. Which leads me to say that the English word scene and the Arabic word shay'in are 🔊 consonant.

[?] In the first part of the topic I mentioned a trivial correlation that, surprisingly, makes sense here. I wrote in ALL IN ONE > COLUMBO > "sir" scenes:

▶ The Simpsons - sir; Homer says: "For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene"."
▶ Columbo - sir; The character hears himself called "sir" and arguably, he's making a scene...

In the Columbo video, the character reacts to being called "sir" by reciting a line of dialogue from a scene in Macbeth: Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, Macbeth - Act5, scene 5.
It was long before I could see any point in it, that serendipity led me to link "sir" and "tomorrow". That may be the missing link (the "?") of the table above.

Synchronicity

"sir" scene

I was in the process of typing up the content of this section when I watched, for the first time in my life, the film A Few Good Men (1992) with Tom Cruise. And there, synchronicity seems to reinforce the idea of correlation between "sir" and "tomorrow":
▶ A Few Good Men - sir; Particular reaction to being called "sir":

- Is this your signature?
- Yes, sir.
- You don't have to call me "sir". Is this your signature?
- Sir, yes, sir.
- You certainly don't need to do it twice in one sentence.
[...]
- What's a garden variety Code Red?
- Sir?
- Harold, you say "sir", I turn around and look for my father.

tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow...

Immediately following the "sir" scene of the interview with the two Marines, I noticed a sequence of short scenes all formed on the same principle: the character played by Tom Cruise talks with another character, and the scene ends with a "see you tomorrow" type of mention. A cinematographic method to create teasing or a certain tension probably, but less trivially it's the synchronicity with the writing of my topic that I'm highlighting here:
▶ A Few Good Men - tomorrows; Tomorrows in a row.

The right conduct

Something I noted:

Qur'an 18:24	The Simpsons - sir	A Few Good Men - sir
18:24 Except [when adding], "If Allah wills." And remember your Lord when you forget [it] and say, "Perhaps my Lord will guide me to what is nearer than this to right conduct."	Homer says: "For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene"." In other words, that his conduct would be in accordance with etiquette.	"What's a Code Red?" | "Sir, a Code Red is a disciplinary engagement." | "What's that mean exactly?" | "Sir, a Marine falls out of line, it's up to the men in his unit to get him back on track."

Time and money

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:25; Three hundred + nine:

And they remained in their cave for three hundred years and exceeded by nine.

▶ The Simpsons - thirty-three hundred; Marge's confession:

We'll have a thirty-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel.

Getting the count right

Qur'an 18:25	The Simpsons - thirty-three hundred
18:25 And they remained in their cave for three hundred years [...]	"We'll have a thirty-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel."
18:25 [...] and exceeded by nine	"We'll have a thirty*️⃣-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel."

^*️⃣"nine" in Ayah 18:25 is "tis'a" (with a 'ayn). Sounds like tisra with an 'r' from the middle part of the throat.
Placing the last syllable of the word "thirty" at the beginning gives "ty-thir". The pronunciation of the 'th' in thirty is close to the /s/ sound. So it sounds like tee-thir, quite close to 🔊 tis'a.

Face to face

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:28; Patience:

And keep yourself patient [by being] with those who call upon their Lord in the morning and the evening, seeking His countenance. And let not your eyes pass beyond them, desiring adornments of the worldly life, and do not obey one whose heart We have made heedless of Our remembrance and who follows his desire and whose affair is ever [in] neglect.

▶ The Simpsons - face to face; Marge faces a dilemma.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:28	The Simpsons - face to face
18:28 "And keep yourself patient [by being] with those who call upon their Lord in the morning and the evening, seeking His countenance1️⃣."	"Come here, Maggie. Oh, Homie I like your in-your-face humanity. I like the way Lisa speaks her mind. I like Bart's... I like Bart."
18:28 "And let not your eyes pass beyond them, desiring adornments of the worldly life"	The main character in the scene first turns her gaze away from the other characters to look in the direction of the reception room, then changes her mind and looks back to them. Facing each of them, one after the other.
18:28 "and do not obey one whose heart We have made heedless of Our remembrance"	"Come on, let's go. I wouldn't want to join any club that would have this me as a member."
18:28 "and who follows his desire and whose affair is ever [in] neglect2️⃣."	"I didn't have to spend our savings on this stupid gown."

^1️⃣"wajhahu", literally "His face".
^2️⃣"furutan", can also be translated as "excess", "exaggeration".

Surrounded

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[29-31]; Fire and gardens:

18:29 And say, "The truth is from your Lord, so whoever wills - let him believe; and whoever wills - let him disbelieve." Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them. And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil, which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place.
18:30 Indeed, those who have believed and done righteous deeds - indeed, We will not allow to be lost the reward of any who did well in deeds.
18:31 Those will have gardens of perpetual residence; beneath them rivers will flow. They will be adorned therein with bracelets of gold and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade, reclining therein on adorned couches. Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place.

▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; The Simpsons ignore the reception and go to Krusty Burger.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[29-31]	The Simpsons - surrounded
18:29 "[...] Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them."	Shot of the exterior of the clubhouse, from which a dense yellowish light emanates: 👁️‍🗨️ The Simpsons - fire walls
18:29 "And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil*️⃣"	A character drinks a yellow liquid: 👁️‍🗨️ The Simpsons - molten brass
18:29 "which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place."	The liquid-drinking character is visually superimposed on another character behind her, whose face will soon express disgust. Followed by a transition shot of a face emitting a bright pulsating light. See ▶ The Simpsons - burning face
18:31 "[...] beneath them rivers will flow."	The floor is washed with water just below where the main characters are seated.
18:31 "[...] and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade,"	(⇢ read [Green and Silk] below the table ⬇️)
18:31 "reclining therein on adorned couches"	The main characters are seated on comfortable banquettes.
18:31 "Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place."	"But, you know, we realized we're more comfortable in a place like this."

^*️⃣"kal-muh'li" in the Qur'anic text. The translation I use here says "murky oil", but another popular interpretation is "molten brass". You can also find "molten copper", "molten rocks", etc. It always refers to a scorching-hot liquid substance.
---
[Green and Silk]

[...] and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade

The whole surah revolves around the idea of comparison between two parties, I see here the entanglement of the notions of life in the "gardens of perpetual residence" and life in this world. I explain, green garments enters the lexical field of gardens while silk is part of the aspirations of this world.
Another thing about silk. I heard an explanation about the locution "sundusin wa-is'tabraqin" (fine silk and brocade). This would refer to fine silk garments with added thickness of fabric (is'tabraqin). The addition of "is'tabraqin" to the locution is understood to express the most expensive silk garments.
Back to The Simpsons:

1. ▶ The Simpsons - city; The main character of the episode is looking for high quality clothing: "Miss? Do you have a Chanel suit or any other high-quality clothes?"
   
2. ▶ The Simpsons - dollar; She finally buys a Chanel dress. Very likely a silk dress: "Ooh. Ooh. Ahh." "Mom, you are looking fabulous." "Yeah. You look great."
   
3. ▶ The Simpsons - face to face; The same character who misses her green dress: "And I like my old green dress. I didn't have to spend our savings on this stupid gown."
   
4. ▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; The character expressed her contentment with her green dress, but outwardly she's still wearing Chanel: "Hey, did you guys just come from the prom?" | "Sort of."
   

The good place

A little thought on the question of the good place and the bad place.

Spoiled for choice

➔ Qur'an 18:[29-31]:

18:29 And say, "The truth is from your Lord, so whoever wills - let him believe; and whoever wills - let him disbelieve." [...]

Qur'an 18:29	Qur'an 18:[30-31]
18:29 "[...] Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them."	18:30 "Indeed, those who have believed and done righteous deeds - indeed, We will not allow to be lost the reward of any who did well in deeds."
18:29 "[...] And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil, which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place."	18:31 "Those will have gardens of perpetual residence; beneath them rivers will flow. They will be adorned therein with bracelets of gold and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade, reclining therein on adorned couches. Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place."

Dump and go

▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; Good place? Bad place?:

Marge	Busboy
"But, you know, we realized we're more comfortable in a place like this."	"Man, you're crazy. This place is a dump. Oh man, I'd be anywhere except this place, that's for sure."

The Good Place

It's likely that some of you have already made the connection with The Good Place show. As for me, I only know it by name, but I understand that the main plot coincides with this subject. I refer to it here because, in addition to that, the 👁️‍🗨️ official imagery features characters sitting on a sofa.
.
.
.
This observation leads me to another. At the beginning of every Simpsons episode there's the couch gag, so I checked what the couch gag is for this episode:
▶ The Simpsons - couch gag: It's about the Simpson family sitting on the couch and their skin seems to have turned green...
◼️ This completes the transcription of the synchromystic correspondence.
End of part 2/3.
Some observations + the conclusion in On the trail of a spirit (3/3) →

← On the trail of a spirit (1/3)
IN THE QUR'AN

THE CAVE

We are now firmly anchored in synchromysticism, and it is in this context that I notice other correspondences with the Qur'an.
I was still pondering the word "club" when a scene from an episode of The Simpsons piqued my curiosity. From there I discovered what I call a synchromystic correspondence between part of the Simpsons episode and the story of the companions of the cave described in Surah 18 of the Qur'an, The Cave.
From an entry point, if we use similarities as markers, the unfolding of the Simpsons scenes is almost in sync with the sequence of ayat in Surah 18 from the moment the young men entered the cave. I'll try to clarify this for you:

In the cave

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[17-18]; The young men entered the cave:

18:17 And [had you been present], you would see the sun when it rose, inclining away from their cave on the right, and when it set, passing away from them on the left, while they were [lying] within an open space thereof. That was from the signs of Allah. He whom Allah guides is the [rightly] guided, but he whom He leaves astray - never will you find for him a protecting guide.
18:18 And you would think them awake, while they were asleep. And We turned them to the right and to the left, while their dog stretched his forelegs at the entrance. If you had looked at them, you would have turned from them in flight and been filled by them with terror.

▶ The Simpsons - sun; Mr. Burns' turn to strike the ball.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[17-18]	The Simpsons - sun
18:17 "And [had you been present], you would see the sun when it rose, inclining away from their cave on the right, and when it set, passing away from them on the left,"	Note that in the first scene of the video the thrown ball is shown merging with the sun. Then the next ball has a deviated trajectory from left to right: "Oh, a cunning stratagem, sir. It's curving right toward the green, and it's... there."
18:17 "while they were [lying] within an open space thereof."	A 👁️‍🗨️ wide open space (clearing) between group of trees.
18:18 "And you would think them awake, while they were asleep."	A character suddenly loses consciousness, causing another character to be confused.
18:18 "And We turned them to the right and to the left,"	A character turning on himself (starting from his left) with a club in his hand. (⇢ read [q-l-b] below the table ⬇️)
18:18 "while their dog stretched his forelegs at the entrance."	👁️‍🗨️ Two parallel golf clubs on the ground, in the foreground in front of the clearing. (⇢ read [k-l-b] below the table ⬇️)
18:18 "If you had looked at them, you would have turned from them in flight and been filled by them with terror."	A character flees in haste at the sight of another lying on the ground.

[q-l-b]: Note that Homer turns through 360° with a club in his hands and the club itself turns on its axis in the air. In Ayah 18:18 the word used to express the action of turning something is "wanuqallibuhum" from the root q-l-b; wa[and]-nu[we]-qallibu[turned]-hum[them].
There is a 🔊 resemblance in sound between the consonants of the word club in English, c-l-b, and the root q-l-b in Arabic (the sound produced by the letter Qaf in Arabic is a kind of [k] pronounced further back in the throat).
---
[k-l-b]: Same idea as [q-l-b] here. In Ayah 18:18 the word used for "while their dog" is wakalbuhum; wa[and]-kalbu[dog]-hum[their]. Kalb from the root k-l-b.
The consonants of the word club in English, c-l-b, and the root k-l-b in Arabic are 🔊 very much alike in sound.
And the dog stretches forth its two forelegs, "dhira'ayhi", which is a declension of the word dhira' (cubit, from the elbow to the tip of the middle finger). Their shape could well be represented by golf clubs.

Delivery

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[19-20]; The companions of the cave are released and discuss their affair:

18:19 And similarly, We awakened them that they might question one another. Said a speaker from among them, "How long have you remained [here]?" They said, "We have remained a day or part of a day." They said, "Your Lord is most knowing of how long you remained. So send one of you with this silver coin of yours to the city and let him look to which is the best of food and bring you provision from it and let him be cautious. And let no one be aware of you.
18:20 Indeed, if they come to know of you, they will stone you or return you to their religion. And never would you succeed, then - ever."

▶ The Simpsons - city; Marge travels to a faraway city in search of a high-quality dress.
▶ The Simpsons - dollar; This time, Marge goes to Main Street and buys a high fashion dress.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[19-20]	The Simpsons - city
18:19 "[...] So send one of you with this silver coin of yours to the city"	A character going alone in a city...
18:19 "and let him look to which is the best of food*️⃣ and bring you provision from it"	"Miss? Do you have a Chanel suit or any other high-quality clothes?"
18:20 "[...] they will stone you"	A character stoned by a golf ball
18:20 "or return you to their religion."	"I'm sure he'd support your application for membership tonight." | "Bull honkey! I don't care about joining this stupid club." | "But does your wife?"

^*️⃣"azka ta'aman", literally "the purest food".

Time is money

Qur'an 18:19	The Simpsons - dollar
18:19 "And similarly, We awakened them that they might question one another. Said a speaker from among them*️⃣,"	Just as they are about to exit the house, the chatty character asks another one questions.
18:19 "How long have you remained [here]?"	"How much did it cost?"
18:19 "They said, "We have remained a day"	"A dollar. Let's go."
18:19 "or part of a day."	"With tax or without?" | "Without. Let me go."

^*️⃣"qâilun minhum", which is understood to mean "the talkative one among them".

Who's the Boss?

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:21; Dispute:

18:21 And similarly, We caused them to be found that they [who found them] would know that the promise of Allah is truth and that of the Hour there is no doubt. [That was] when they disputed among themselves about their affair and [then] said, "Construct over them a structure. Their Lord is most knowing about them." Said those who prevailed in the matter, "We will surely take [for ourselves] over them a masjid."

▶ The Simpsons - party; The Simpsons go to the reception.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:21	The Simpsons - party
18:21 "[...][That was] when they disputed among themselves about their affair"	Arguing characters
18:21 "and [then] said, "Construct over them a structure1️⃣. Their Lord is most knowing about them2️⃣.""	"I'm driving up to the main building. They've got valet3️⃣ parking tonight."
18:21 "Said those who prevailed in the matter, "We will surely take [for ourselves] over them a masjid4️⃣.""	The dominant character chooses that they should walk instead: "Stop the car. We're walking." Following that decision they find themselves in a situation 👁️‍🗨️ reminiscent of the faithful behind their imam in a masjid (a mosque).

^1️⃣In other translations "bun'yanan" is translated as "building".
^2️⃣"them" refers to the people of the cave. These people are described earlier in the surah as "young men of sound judgment" (fit'yatun). Fit'yatun is a declension of the word fatan. Fatan has another meaning, used later in the same surah, that of "servant/valet/slave" (lifatahu), remember that.
^3️⃣See 2️⃣ above, young man/valet/servant are definitions of the same word in surah 18.
^4️⃣I don't have a clear idea of what the sentence means. The term masjid means a station of prostration, it is used to refer to mosques for example because the faithful stop there to practice prayers composed of prostrations (sujud).

The Hour is close, in sound.

➔ Qur'an 18:21; The Hour is to be expected:

18:21 And similarly, We caused them to be found that they [who found them] would know that the promise of Allāh is truth and that of the Hour there is no doubt. [...]

▶ The Simpsons - party; Homer hurries to the building, expecting to be called sir:

For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene".

The word translated as "the-Hour" is as-sa'ah. In the ayah, the word is pronounced as-sa'a-ta, but when the word is isolated, the final '-ta' disappears to be replaced by a small breath that comes from the bottom of the throat.
The ' in as-sa'ah corresponds to the Arabic letter 'ayn. It is pronounced by the expulsion of the breath through the constriction of the middle part of the throat. It can sound like a guttural /.
The words sa'ah in Arabic and sir in English are 🔊 close in sound.

Back to fitness

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:22; Count:

18:22 They [i.e., people] will say there were three, the fourth of them being their dog; and they will say there were five, the sixth of them being their dog - guessing at the unseen; and they will say there were seven, and the eighth of them was their dog. Say, [O Muḥammad], "My Lord is most knowing of their number. None knows them except a few. So do not argue about them except with an obvious argument and do not inquire about them among [the speculators] from anyone."

[+] In addition to the normal continuation of the thread of ayat we're going to look back at ayat counting the beginning of the youths' story. These are ayat that we haven't covered yet:
➔ Qur'an 18:[13-16]; Beginning of the story:

18:13 It is We who relate to you, [O Muhammad], their story in truth. Indeed, they were youths who believed in their Lord, and We increased them in guidance.
18:14 And We made firm their hearts when they stood up and said, "Our Lord is the Lord of the heavens and the earth. Never will we invoke besides Him any deity. We would have certainly spoken, then, an excessive transgression.
18:15 These, our people, have taken besides Him deities. Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority? And who is more unjust than one who invents about Allah a lie?"
18:16 [The youths said to one another], "And when you have withdrawn from them and that which they worship other than Allah, retreat to the cave. Your Lord will spread out for you of His mercy and will prepare for you from your affair facility."

▶ The Simpsons - triangle; The Simpsons discuss what they are going to do at the reception.
▶ The Simpsons - highlight; High point of the argument.

Semantic comparisons

I based my comparisons on the vocabulary used in Ayah 18:22. Specifically, the three roots m-r-y, ẓ-h-r and f-t-y.

m-r-y

18:22 [...] So do not argue about them except with an obvious argument

The words used in Arabic translated as "to argue"/"argument" are tumari/mira'an from the root m-r-y. This root generates three main groups of ideas: [dispute/opposition/contestation], [hesitation/doubt], and [squeezing the maximum amount of milk out of a camel's udder]:

Qur'an 18:22 "So do not argue [tumari] about them"	The Simpsons - triangle
[dispute/opposition/contestation]	[opposition/contestation] "I'm going to regale everyone with my anecdote. You know, the one I tried to say on the radio? Who's going to bleep me this time?"
[squeezing the maximum amount of milk out of a camel's udder]	["milking" an old lady for her money] "I'm going to pose as an Italian count and get some old lady to leave me all her money."
[hesitation/doubt]	[hesitation/doubt] "I'm going to ask people if they know their servants' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first."

[+] A little clue led me to take a closer look at the ayat 18:[13-16] narrating the beginning of the story. I made an observation based on Marge's words, "No vulgarity. No mischief. No politics.":

Qur'an 18:[14-15]	The Simpsons - triangle "No vulgarity. No mischief. No politics."
18:14 "[...] And We made firm their hearts when they stood up and said, "Our Lord is the Lord of the heavens and the earth. Never will we invoke besides Him any deity. We would have certainly spoken, then, an excessive transgression." (⇢ read [shatatan] below the table ⬇️)	[vulgarity] "I'm going to regale everyone with my anecdote. You know, the one I tried to say on the radio? Who's going to bleep me this time?"
18:15 "These, our people, have taken besides Him deities. Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority?" (⇢ read [qawmuna] below the table ⬇️)	[politics] "I'm going to ask people if they know their servants' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first."
18:15 "Why do they not bring for [worship of] them a clear authority? And who is more unjust than one who invents about Allah a lie?"" (⇢ read [mis-chief] below the table ⬇️)	[mischief] "I'm going to pose as an Italian count and get some old lady to leave me all her money."

[shatatan] The young people's story and their conversations are said to be narrated "bil-haqqi" (in truth), i.e. as it happened. "shatatan", translated here as "an excessive transgression", is an informal word that is part of youth jargon, according to one explanation I heard. It's a very familiar way of saying "utter nonsense", "an ENORMOUS absurdity".
Perhaps a notch less vulgar than "(talk) sh!t" (or "bullsh#t") but 🔊 phonetically resembling it.
---
[qawmuna] "hâulâi" (These) is used to target a specific group of people. In this case "qawmuna" (our people). This is a statement about community affairs. Incidentally, "qawmuna" is 🔊 phonetically close to "common".
"bi-sultanin bayyinin" (with a clear authority) suggests a thinly veiled criticism of the political power. Indeed, the word sultanin can be translated as "compelling evidence" but also as "authority", "rule, dominion" or "sultan".
---
[mis-chief] I've repeated the sentence about authority here, because in this story, political authority conditions the religious situation of the people.
In my opinion, it's not just a statement about the people's misguidance, but a barely concealed accusation against their chief and their attachment to him. A pseudo "sultan" who is accused of inventing a baseless lie and thus being a source of wrongdoing and obscurantism.
[+] Another observation:

Qur'an 18:14	The Simpsons - triangle
18:14 "And We made firm their hearts*️⃣ when they stood up and said,"	Homer's group begins to walk, and as soon as Homer speaks, the "camera" shots show the growing cohesion of the group until they end up in a tight row. They speak collegially and the camera following their faces forms a triangle (the triangle is reputed to be the most stable form for a structure).

^*️⃣"rabatna 'ala qulubihim", literally "we tied over their hearts" meaning we've fortified their hearts to keep their composure. It also suggests that their hearts are tied to each other, forming a steady union.

ẓ-h-r

18:22 [...] except with an obvious argument

The word used in Arabic translated as "obvious" is ẓahiran, which means "manifest (whereas previously latent)". This word comes from the root ẓ-h-r which generates seemingly distant meanings from each other. It gives the nouns back (of the body) and midday (when the sun is high) and also the verb to manifest.
A study in French tries to dissect the origin of the polysemy of this root: Une étude de la racine ظهر √ẓhr (A study of the root ظهر √ẓhr) by Jean-Claude Rolland with the collaboration of Jean-Marc Guyetand. The official link is dead at the time I publish this post, fortunately I had made a backup.
I skip the technical explanations and (do my best to) translate the conclusion into English:

Conclusion
There is only one root ظهر √ẓhr, which results from the crossing of the etymons {ẓ,r} and {h,r}.
– By the etymon {ẓ,r}, this root comes under the matrix of the throat and neck. Its semanticism is mainly oriented towards the back perceived as the extension of the back part of the neck, the nape of the neck. The etymon {h,r} only comes in reinforcement in the items relating to the notions of brilliance, midday, appearing, etc.
– But as there is only one word ظَهْر ẓahr to designate both the back of bipeds and that of quadrupeds, the root ظهر √ẓhr comes, by enantiosemy, to express both what is in the back of some, therefore behind them, hidden, invisible, and what is on the backs of others, therefore above, salient, shining, uncovered, visible.
(July 2020)

Qur'an 18:22	The Simpsons - highlight
18:22 "[...] except with an obvious [ẓahiran] argument"	"You kids should thank your mother. Now that she's a better person we can see how awful we really are." (⇢ read [ẓahiran] below the table ⬇️)

[ẓahiran] It seems to me that all of these notions carried by the root ẓ-h-r have been assimilated in the form of a cartoon scene:

• Verticality: Homer's statement carries in itself the notions of the root ẓ-h-r. Something that has reached a (supposedly) high point ("Now that she's a better person") leads to the manifestation ("we can see") of something not observed ("how awful we really are.").
  
• Horizontality: Marge turns her back to Homer and the children, and the moment Homer's words hit her is emphasized by a play of light and shadow. Something emerged, the light grows on the front side until it stops at the boundary between front and back. And vice versa, when she finally turns back to Homer and the children. Plus, the dress clearly highlights the throat and neck.
  

f-t-y

18:22 [...] and do not inquire about them among [the speculators] from anyone.

The word used in Arabic translated as "to inquire" is tastafti. It is a verb formed from the root f-t-y which is declined in different meanings. From this root comes the word fatan which is used in this same surah (n°18) under its two definitions, "young men of sound judgment" (fit'yatun) and "servant/valet/slave" (lifatahu).

Qur'an 18:22	The Simpsons - triangle
18:22 "[...] and do not inquire1️⃣ about them2️⃣ among [the speculators] from anyone."	"I'm going to ask people if they know their servants3️⃣' last names or, in the case of butlers, their first." | "No! No! No! Not tonight!"

^1️⃣The word in arabic is "tastafti" from the root f-t-y.
^2️⃣"them" refers to "fityatun" (from f-t-y; young men).
^3️⃣see explanation above the table.

Tomorrow

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[23-24]; Tomorrow:

18:23 And never say of anything, "Indeed, I will do that tomorrow,"
18:24 Except [when adding], "If Allah wills." And remember your Lord when you forget [it] and say, "Perhaps my Lord will guide me to what is nearer than this to right conduct."

▶ The Simpsons - sir; Back to the "sir" scene.

Re-verse engineering

Homer Simpson:

For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene".

I think I can reconstruct some semblance of Homer's line by drawing on the two ayat above:

The Simpsons - sir	Qur'an 18:[23-24]
maybe someone will	18:24 Perhaps my Lord will
call me	18:23 "wala taqulanna" (And never say). "qul" means "say". An emphatic suffix is added to give the form "-qulanna"; that is phonetically close to qul-'ana' (ana = me, I) ~~> qul 'me' ~~> call me.
sir	? (⇢ read [?] below the table ⬇️)
without adding	18:24 Except [when adding]
"you're making	18:23 "Indeed, I will do
a scene"	18:23 that. "that" refers to "of anything" or more precisely to lishay'in; li[of]-shay'in[a thing]. I find that the /sh/ and /s/ sounds are often interchangeable in this kind of comparison. Which leads me to say that the English word scene and the Arabic word shay'in are 🔊 consonant.

[?] In the first part of the topic I mentioned a trivial correlation that, surprisingly, makes sense here. I wrote in ALL IN ONE > COLUMBO > "sir" scenes:

▶ The Simpsons - sir; Homer says: "For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene"."
▶ Columbo - sir; The character hears himself called "sir" and arguably, he's making a scene...

In the Columbo video, the character reacts to being called "sir" by reciting a line of dialogue from a scene in Macbeth: Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, Macbeth - Act5, scene 5.
It was long before I could see any point in it, that serendipity led me to link "sir" and "tomorrow". That may be the missing link (the "?") of the table above.

Synchronicity

"sir" scene

I was in the process of typing up the content of this section when I watched, for the first time in my life, the film A Few Good Men (1992) with Tom Cruise. And there, synchronicity seems to reinforce the idea of correlation between "sir" and "tomorrow":
▶ A Few Good Men - sir; Particular reaction to being called "sir":

- Is this your signature?
- Yes, sir.
- You don't have to call me "sir". Is this your signature?
- Sir, yes, sir.
- You certainly don't need to do it twice in one sentence.
[...]
- What's a garden variety Code Red?
- Sir?
- Harold, you say "sir", I turn around and look for my father.

tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow...

Immediately following the "sir" scene of the interview with the two Marines, I noticed a sequence of short scenes all formed on the same principle: the character played by Tom Cruise talks with another character, and the scene ends with a "see you tomorrow" type of mention. A cinematographic method to create teasing or a certain tension probably, but less trivially it's the synchronicity with the writing of my topic that I'm highlighting here:
▶ A Few Good Men - tomorrows; Tomorrows in a row.

The right conduct

Something I noted:

Qur'an 18:24	The Simpsons - sir	A Few Good Men - sir
18:24 Except [when adding], "If Allah wills." And remember your Lord when you forget [it] and say, "Perhaps my Lord will guide me to what is nearer than this to right conduct."	Homer says: "For once, maybe someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene"." In other words, that his conduct would be in accordance with etiquette.	"What's a Code Red?" | "Sir, a Code Red is a disciplinary engagement." | "What's that mean exactly?" | "Sir, a Marine falls out of line, it's up to the men in his unit to get him back on track."

Time and money

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:25; Three hundred + nine:

And they remained in their cave for three hundred years and exceeded by nine.

▶ The Simpsons - thirty-three hundred; Marge's confession:

We'll have a thirty-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel.

Getting the count right

Qur'an 18:25	The Simpsons - thirty-three hundred
18:25 And they remained in their cave for three hundred years [...]	"We'll have a thirty-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel."
18:25 [...] and exceeded by nine	"We'll have a thirty*️⃣-three hundred dollars credit at Chanel."

^*️⃣"nine" in Ayah 18:25 is "tis'a" (with a 'ayn). Sounds like tisra with an 'r' from the middle part of the throat.
Placing the last syllable of the word "thirty" at the beginning gives "ty-thir". The pronunciation of the 'th' in thirty is close to the /s/ sound. So it sounds like tee-thir, quite close to 🔊 tis'a.

Face to face

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:28; Patience:

And keep yourself patient [by being] with those who call upon their Lord in the morning and the evening, seeking His countenance. And let not your eyes pass beyond them, desiring adornments of the worldly life, and do not obey one whose heart We have made heedless of Our remembrance and who follows his desire and whose affair is ever [in] neglect.

▶ The Simpsons - face to face; Marge faces a dilemma.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:28	The Simpsons - face to face
18:28 "And keep yourself patient [by being] with those who call upon their Lord in the morning and the evening, seeking His countenance1️⃣."	"Come here, Maggie. Oh, Homie I like your in-your-face humanity. I like the way Lisa speaks her mind. I like Bart's... I like Bart."
18:28 "And let not your eyes pass beyond them, desiring adornments of the worldly life"	The main character in the scene first turns her gaze away from the other characters to look in the direction of the reception room, then changes her mind and looks back to them. Facing each of them, one after the other.
18:28 "and do not obey one whose heart We have made heedless of Our remembrance"	"Come on, let's go. I wouldn't want to join any club that would have this me as a member."
18:28 "and who follows his desire and whose affair is ever [in] neglect2️⃣."	"I didn't have to spend our savings on this stupid gown."

^1️⃣"wajhahu", literally "His face".
^2️⃣"furutan", can also be translated as "excess", "exaggeration".

Surrounded

Sources

➔ Qur'an 18:[29-31]; Fire and gardens:

18:29 And say, "The truth is from your Lord, so whoever wills - let him believe; and whoever wills - let him disbelieve." Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them. And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil, which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place.
18:30 Indeed, those who have believed and done righteous deeds - indeed, We will not allow to be lost the reward of any who did well in deeds.
18:31 Those will have gardens of perpetual residence; beneath them rivers will flow. They will be adorned therein with bracelets of gold and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade, reclining therein on adorned couches. Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place.

▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; The Simpsons ignore the reception and go to Krusty Burger.

Comparison table

Qur'an 18:[29-31]	The Simpsons - surrounded
18:29 "[...] Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them."	Shot of the exterior of the clubhouse, from which a dense yellowish light emanates: 👁️‍🗨️ The Simpsons - fire walls
18:29 "And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil*️⃣"	A character drinks a yellow liquid: 👁️‍🗨️ The Simpsons - molten brass
18:29 "which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place."	The liquid-drinking character is visually superimposed on another character behind her, whose face will soon express disgust. Followed by a transition shot of a face emitting a bright pulsating light. See ▶ The Simpsons - burning face
18:31 "[...] beneath them rivers will flow."	The floor is washed with water just below where the main characters are seated.
18:31 "[...] and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade,"	(⇢ read [Green and Silk] below the table ⬇️)
18:31 "reclining therein on adorned couches"	The main characters are seated on comfortable banquettes.
18:31 "Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place."	"But, you know, we realized we're more comfortable in a place like this."

^*️⃣"kal-muh'li" in the Qur'anic text. The translation I use here says "murky oil", but another popular interpretation is "molten brass". You can also find "molten copper", "molten rocks", etc. It always refers to a scorching-hot liquid substance.
---
[Green and Silk]

[...] and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade

The whole surah revolves around the idea of comparison between two parties, I see here the entanglement of the notions of life in the "gardens of perpetual residence" and life in this world. I explain, green garments enters the lexical field of gardens while silk is part of the aspirations of this world.
Another thing about silk. I heard an explanation about the locution "sundusin wa-is'tabraqin" (fine silk and brocade). This would refer to fine silk garments with added thickness of fabric (is'tabraqin). The addition of "is'tabraqin" to the locution is understood to express the most expensive silk garments.
Back to The Simpsons:

1. ▶ The Simpsons - city; The main character of the episode is looking for high quality clothing: "Miss? Do you have a Chanel suit or any other high-quality clothes?"
   
2. ▶ The Simpsons - dollar; She finally buys a Chanel dress. Very likely a silk dress: "Ooh. Ooh. Ahh." "Mom, you are looking fabulous." "Yeah. You look great."
   
3. ▶ The Simpsons - face to face; The same character who misses her green dress: "And I like my old green dress. I didn't have to spend our savings on this stupid gown."
   
4. ▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; The character expressed her contentment with her green dress, but outwardly she's still wearing Chanel: "Hey, did you guys just come from the prom?" | "Sort of."
   

The good place

A little thought on the question of the good place and the bad place.

Spoiled for choice

➔ Qur'an 18:[29-31]:

18:29 And say, "The truth is from your Lord, so whoever wills - let him believe; and whoever wills - let him disbelieve." [...]

Qur'an 18:29	Qur'an 18:[30-31]
18:29 "[...] Indeed, We have prepared for the wrongdoers a fire whose walls will surround them."	18:30 "Indeed, those who have believed and done righteous deeds - indeed, We will not allow to be lost the reward of any who did well in deeds."
18:29 "[...] And if they call for relief, they will be relieved with water like murky oil, which scalds [their] faces. Wretched is the drink, and evil is the resting place."	18:31 "Those will have gardens of perpetual residence; beneath them rivers will flow. They will be adorned therein with bracelets of gold and will wear green garments of fine silk and brocade, reclining therein on adorned couches. Excellent is the reward, and good is the resting place."

Dump and go

▶ The Simpsons - surrounded; Good place? Bad place?:

Marge	Busboy
"But, you know, we realized we're more comfortable in a place like this."	"Man, you're crazy. This place is a dump. Oh man, I'd be anywhere except this place, that's for sure."

The Good Place

It's likely that some of you have already made the connection with The Good Place show. As for me, I only know it by name, but I understand that the main plot coincides with this subject. I refer to it here because, in addition to that, the 👁️‍🗨️ official imagery features characters sitting on a sofa.
.
.
.
This observation leads me to another. At the beginning of every Simpsons episode there's the couch gag, so I checked what the couch gag is for this episode:
▶ The Simpsons - couch gag: It's about the Simpson family sitting on the couch and their skin seems to have turned green...
◼️ This completes the transcription of the synchromystic correspondence.
End of part 2/3.
Some observations + the conclusion in On the trail of a spirit (3/3) →

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Have a wonderful Easter, please add anything I missed or you'd like to contribute.

THURSDAY - MARCH 28

NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball Championship @ TD Garden
Museums at Night @ Harvard Art Museums @ 5PMGet ready for an evening of art, music, food, and more! This event is free and open to everyone.
Josh Blue Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM
Lev Fer Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 8PM
Ídolos Latinos 2024 @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM This concert is a celebration of the rich and diverse musical heritage of Latin America.
Candlelight: A Tribute to Coldplay @ Temple Ohabei Shalom @ 7PM / 9PM Beacon Street Quartet performs Coldplay’s biggest and most beloved hits in classical interpretation!
Captain Jack & The Strangers: A Tribute to Billy Joel in Concert @ NSMT @ 7:30PM
Kenny Mason @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Arlo Parks @ Royale @ 7PM
Metal Siege: Hard Rock & Metal Night @ The Sinclair @ 9:30PM

FRIDAY - MARCH 29

‘Blue Giant’ Screening @ MFA @ 7M *Part of the UNIQLO Festival of Films from Japan
flipturn @ House of Blues @ 8PM
Grouplove @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Bully
Girlschool @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM With Lillian Axe
I Don’t Know How But They Found Me @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Kai Wachi @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
Steve Angello @ Royale @ 10PM
Eliza McLamb @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM
Fatoumata Diawara @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM

SATURDAY - MARCH 30

NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball Championship @ TD Garden
Ongoing - Somerville Winter Farmers Market @ The Armory @ 9:30AM
Family Egg Hunt @ First Parish of Sudbury @ 10AM
Spring Wine & Seltzer Fest @ Time Out Market Sip, savor, and celebrate Spring with your friends and fellow wine and seltzer lovers surrounded by vibrant energy, with an array of drink tastings and tantalizing food options.
Dirty Deeds: The AC/DC Experience @ NSMT @ 8PM Dirty Deeds’ performance revisits all of the timeless AC/DC hits along with a theatrical ride through rock n’ roll history.
Guster @ MGM Music Hall @ 7PM With Fruit Bats
Reggae Dancehall Fest ft. Teejay3k @ House of Blues @ 8:30PM
Dopapod @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM With Sicard Hollow
Renesans @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
VO + Juju @ Big Night Live @ 9PM
Nora En Pure @ Big Night Live @ 10:30PM
Anime Rave @ Royale @ 10PM
Stolen Gin @ The Sinclair @ 8PM

ALL WEEKEND

FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Shane Gillis Stand Up @ Wang Theatre
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Ronny Chieng Stand Up @ The Wilbur
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Orlando Leyba Stand Up @ Laugh Boston
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Ray Harrington Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - BoSome Dance Company Performance @ Calderwood Pavilion Enjoy an evening of awe-inspiring contemporary dance!
All weekend - Spring Spectacular Egg Hunt @ Berlin Farms Enjoy time as a family and welcome in Spring at Berlin Farms’ egg-stravaganza! Activities include ponies, ride-on jeep, photo props, games, small petting zoo, and, of course, egg hunting!
All weekend - Anime Boston @ Hynes Convention Center Anime Boston is an annual convention that celebrates Japanese culture and media, such as anime, manga, and video games.
All weekend - Boston Comedy Fest Enjoy the best of local and national comedians at different Boston venues!
All weekend - D.L. Hughley Stand Up @ City Winery All weekend - Ringling Bros. Circus @ Agganis Arena The reimagined Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey® invites children of all ages to a spectacle of superhuman feats and thrills!
All weekend - Dvorák & Elgar in Concert @ Symphony Hall World-renowned guests join the BSO for an exciting program featuring Edward Elgar’s regal and impassioned Cello Concerto and Dvořák’s darkly majestic Symphony No. 7.
All weekend - ‘Mrs. Krishnan’s Party’ Show @ Black Box Theatre Step into the back room of Mrs Krishnan’s convenience store where actors juggle cooking, music, audiences and heart-felt drama.
All weekend - ‘A Message in a Bottle’ Dance Show @ Emerson Colonial Theatre This spectacular new dance-theatre show from five-time Olivier Award nominee, Kate Prince is inspired by and set to the iconic hits of 17-time Grammy Award-winning artist Sting.
All weekend - ‘A Gentleman’s Guide to Love & Murder’ Musical @ The Company Theatre LAST CHANCE - Enjoy the Tony award winning musical comedy set in Downton Abbey era England where a distant heir tries to speed up the line of succession by all means possible.
All weekend - ‘King Hedley II’ Play @ Hibernian Hall LAST CHANCE - Actors’ Shakespeare Project takes on one of August Wilson’s powerful ‘The Pittsburgh Cycle’ plays, examining family tensions and the Black experience during Reagan America.
All weekend - ‘Cost of Living’ Play @ Roberts Studio Theatre LAST CHANCE - In this wry and quietly observed play, Polish-born playwright Martyna Majok interweaves the stories of four lonely souls to examine the forces that bring people together and the ways we all need each other.

ONGOING

Ongoing - Winteractive @ Downtown This free, walkable art experience features 16 artworks and interactive play elements in downtown Boston.
Ongoing - Winter Sauna Experience @ Rose Kennedy Greenway LAST CHANCE - Moki Winter Village is a unique wellness oasis featuring saunas and cold-plunge pools tucked away between the city’s skyscrapers.
Ongoing - Immersive Disney Animation @ Boch Center Step into the art and legacy of Walt Disney Animation Studios and celebrate the music, artistry and animation from the creators of Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Big Hero 6 and many more.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, Rihanna, Beyoncé, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium.
Ongoing - ‘Wordplay’ Exhibition @ ICA Highlighting the rich interplay between imagery and text, the exhibition showcases how contemporary artists have played with words to animate and expand their art practices.
Ongoing - ‘Hallyu! The Korean Wave’ Exhibition @ MFA Enjoy an immersive and multisensory journey through Korea’s fascinating history, and celebrate its contemporary vibrant creative force.
Ongoing - ‘ Dinorá Justice: The Lay of the Land’ Exhibition @ MFA In her multidisciplinary works, Brazilian American artist Dinorá Justice uses a distinct visual vocabulary to examine intertwined histories of gender, landscape, and visual culture.
Ongoing - ‘Mondrian: Foundations’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition presents 28 paintings and works on paper, primarily from Mondrian’s early career, that trace the artist’s explorations as he progressed from realistic traditions to experimental abstractions.
Ongoing - ‘Comrade Sisters: Women of the Black Panther Party’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition brings together 27 powerful photographs by Stephen Shames that feature the women of the Black Panther party and showcase their crucial work for the movement.
Ongoing - ‘Thinking Small: Dutch Art to Scale’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring 15 intriguing objects from 17th-century Netherlands such as paintings, prints, silver medals, and books, this exhibition compels viewers to reconsider their relationship to the world around them.
Ongoing - ‘Raqib Shaw: Ballads of East and West’ Exhibition @ ISG Museum Shaw’s images of magic and mystery combine Western artistic tradition with ornamental elements derived from the Japanese, Persian, and Indian cultures that he vividly remembers from his youth.
Ongoing - ‘Picasso: War, Combat, and Revolution’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the dictator Francisco Franco’s Spain, imagery of death, struggles of good and evil, political and artistic revolution, and issues of desire and capture.
Ongoing - ‘Our Time on Earth’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum This traveling exhibition from the Barbican Centre in London celebrates the power of global creativity to transform the conversation around the climate emergency.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

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ST. PATRICK’S DAY 🍀

THURSDAY - Westlife: A St. Patrick’s Day Special @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM
THURSDAY - All Irish Comedy Tour @ Laugh Boston @ 8PM Featuring Mick Thomas and Sean Finnerty
FRIDAY - St. Patrick’s Day Shamrock Showdown @ Murphy Skating Rink @ 2PM It's a hockey tournament showdown between the NYPD & BFD. Plus, raffle baskets, 50/50, games, and scholarship applications are available.
SATURDAY - 13th Annual Irish Festival @ Patriot Place @ 11AM The daylong celebration will feature live performances by Irish musicians and step dancers, as well as a full slate of free Irish-themed activities for the whole family to enjoy.
SATURDAY - Family St. Patrick’s Day @ Irish Cultural Centre @ 11AM Enjoy a fun filled day of St. Patrick’s festivities with live music, Irish dancing, and activities!
SATURDAY - Irish Dance Show @ JFK Library and Museum @ 10:30AM Exuberant dancers demonstrate athleticism, skill, and poise while presenting traditional and contemporary styles of Irish dance.
SATURDAY - Boston’s Official Saint Patrick’s Day Pub Crawl Join the 25,000 people bar hopping through the West End, Faneuil Hall, Fenway, Seaport, and Financial District with exclusive access to 50+ venues.
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Big Irish Jay Stand Up @ Laugh Boston
SUNDAY - St. Patrick’s Day / Evacuation Day Parade @ South Boston The annual parade is back in South Boston, where it has been a tradition for more than 110 years. It includes marching bands, police and army contingents, costume spectacles, novelty vehicles, and a general "green" atmosphere.
SUNDAY - Big Band Bollocks @ City Winery @ 7:30PM Back in Boston For St. Patrick's Day Ft. A Tribute Set To Shane McGowan & The Pogues
All Weekend - Dropkick Murphys @ MGM Music Hall @ 7PM With Pennywise

THURSDAY - MARCH 14

Celtics vs Suns @ TD Garden @ 7:30PM
Nowruz Celebration @ MFA @ 5PM Celebrate the ancient festival of Nowruz and discover unique traditions from around the world, revel in magnificent works of art, enjoy lively dance and music performances, and much more.
After Dark @ MIT Museum @ 6PM Enjoy an adult-only lively evening of entertainment, science, and tinkering.
Candlelight: A Tribute to Queen @ Temple Ohabei Shalom @ 7PM / 9PM Hear your favorite Queen songs classically reimagined.
Samantha Fish + Jesse Dayton @ The Wilbur @ 8PM
Dropkick Murphys @ House of Blues @ 7PM
Between The Buried And Me @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM With The Acacia Strain
COBRAH @ Royale @ 7PM
Mindchatter @ The Sinclair @ 8PM With Familiar Faces
Taylor Swift Party @ Crystal Ballroom @ 9PM
The Brothers Project @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

FRIDAY - MARCH 15

‘The Holdovers’ Screening @ MFA @ 7PM
Andrew Dice Clay Stand Up @ Shubert Theatre @ 8PM
Roy Wood Jr. Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM
Jessi Stegall Dance Performance @ ICA @ 8PM Set to Clara Rockmore’s arrangements of classical scores for theremin, the dance-theatre piece explores themes of grief, remembrance, and devotion.
Jazz Concert: Tigran Hamasyan @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM
Juanes @ Orpheum Theatre @ 8PM
Offset @ House of Blues @ 7PM
Ricky Duran @ North Shore Music Theatre @ 7:30PM
Between The Buried And Me @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM With The Acacia Strain
The Coronas @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Silk: R&B Night @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
Chelsea Wolfe @ Royale @ 7PM With Divide and Dissolve
Red Baraat @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM With Air Devi
Fort Nights @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7:30PM Enjoy a musical celebration of Gary Smith & the music of Fort Apache Studios

SATURDAY - MARCH 16

Bruins vs Flyers @ TD Garden @ 7PM
Ongoing - Somerville Winter Farmers Market @ The Armory @ 9:30AM
‘Seven Samurai’ Screening @ MFA @ 1PM Part of the UNIQLO Festival of Films from Japan
Zakir Khan Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 11AM / 3PM / 7PM
Jazz Concert: Miho Hazama and m_unit @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM
Sandy Hackett’s Rat Pack Show @ North Shore Music Theatre @ 8PM Audiences can experience this critically acclaimed, hugely entertaining theatrical production which includes exciting new arrangements of classic and never-before-heard Rat Pack songs.
Jon Batiste @ Orpheum Theatre @ 8PM
The Disco Biscuits @ House of Blues @ 6:30PM With Karina Rykman
Arly Lariviere @ Roadrunner @ 9PM
Matisyahu @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Natalie Jane @ Brighton Music Hall @ 5PM
Emo Night Brooklyn @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Costa @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
Tow’rs @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM With A Boy and His Kite
Broadway Rave @ Crystal Ballroom @ 9PM
Enter The Haggis @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

SUNDAY - MARCH 17

Revolution vs FC Cincinnati @ Gillette Stadium @ 2PM
Another Slice of Pi Day @ MIT Museum @ 10AM Explore how we can find the area of a circle, build your own Möbius strip in the Maker Hub, and test your memory at our Pi Recitation Contest.
Orchestre de Paris @ Symphony Hall @ 7PM Two young superstars lead the way when the Orchestre de Paris makes a return to Celebrity Series with a performance of Rachmaninoff’s Piano Concerto No. 2.
William Black @ House of Blues @ 8PM
Sleater-Kinney @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM With Black Belt Eagle Scout
HEALTH @ Royale @ 7PM With Pixel Grip + King Yosef
Sleepytime Gorilla Museum @ The Sinclair @ 8PM

ALL WEEKEND

THURSDAY & FRIDAY - ‘The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time’ Play @ Zack Box Theatre Following a young boy on a detective quest, this touching play is a story of resilience and hope when the world feels against us.
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Chris Zito Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Beethoven’s Symphony No. 9 in Concert @ Symphony Hall Guest conductor Raphaël Pichon and Handel + Haydn Society Orchestra and Chorus deliver a fervently fresh take on this magnum opus in honor of its bicentennial.
All weekend - Curling @ The Liberty Hotel LAST CHANCE - Enjoy a winter Curling experience in the Liberty's private patio, complete with seasonal cocktails and bites.
All weekend - Dine Out Boston 2024 Dine Out Boston is the perfect opportunity to take advantage of delicious deals at participating restaurants.
All weekend - ‘Cinderella’ Ballet @ Citizens Bank Opera House Set to Prokofiev’s classic score with spectacular set and costume design, Frederick Ahston’s unique production brings epic story to life with all the artistry and emotion you can imagine.
All weekend - WinterWorks Dance Concert @ Boston Conservatory Theater This annual dance concert features the mainstage debut of Boston Conservatory's first-year contemporary dance and commercial dance students.
All weekend - Dvorák, Janáček, and Langer in Concert @ Symphony Hall The BSO and eminent English conductor Sir Mark Elder perform a program full of whimsy, fantasy, and folklore.
All weekend - ‘The Cher Show’ Musical @ Wang Theatre ‘The Cher Show’ is 35 smash hits, six decades of stardom, two rock-star husbands, and countless EGOT awards, all in one unabashedly fabulous new musical that will have audiences dancing in the aisles!
All weekend - ‘Girl from the North Country’ Musical @ Emerson Colonial Theatre This Tony-award winning new musical reimagines 20 legendary songs of Bob Dylan as they’ve never been heard before.
All weekend - ‘King Hedley II’ Play @ Hibernian Hall Actors’ Shakespeare Project takes on one of August Wilson’s powerful ‘The Pittsburgh Cycle’ plays, examining family tensions and the Black experience during Reagan America.
All weekend - ‘Cost of Living’ Play @ Roberts Studio Theatre In this wry and quietly observed play, Polish-born playwright Martyna Majok interweaves the stories of four lonely souls to examine the forces that bring people together and the ways we all need each other.
All weekend - ‘Measure For Measure’ Play @ Black Box Theatre Written amidst religious and cultural turmoil, every character in ‘Measure For Measure’ has a different sense of what it means to live morally and authentically.
All weekend - ‘Thirst’ Play @ Lyric Stage LAST CHANCE - Tension, humor, and hope reside in this heartbreaking tale of love and belonging set during Eugene O’Neil’s classic ‘Long Day’s Journey Into Night.’
All weekend - ‘Stand Up If You’re Here Tonight’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre After sold out runs in LA, Chicago, and Paris, this thoroughly unique, interactive theatrical experience from Olivier Award-nominated John Kolvenbach comes to Boston.

ONGOING

Ongoing - Winteractive @ Downtown This free, walkable art experience features 16 artworks and interactive play elements in downtown Boston.
Ongoing - Winter Sauna Experience @ Rose Kennedy Greenway Moki Winter Village is a unique wellness oasis featuring saunas and cold-plunge pools tucked away between the city’s skyscrapers.
Ongoing - ‘Deep Sky’ IMAX Screening @ MoS Go on a journey to the beginning of time and space, to never-before-seen cosmic landscapes as captured by NASA’s Webb Telescope in this new IMAX documentary.
Ongoing - Immersive Disney Animation @ Boch Center Step into the art and legacy of Walt Disney Animation Studios and celebrate the music, artistry and animation from the creators of Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Big Hero 6 and many more.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Lady Gaga, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium
Ongoing - ‘Wordplay’ Exhibition @ ICA Highlighting the rich interplay between imagery and text, the exhibition showcases how contemporary artists have played with words to animate and expand their art practices.
Ongoing - ‘ Dinorá Justice: The Lay of the Land’ Exhibition @ MFA In her multidisciplinary works, Brazilian American artist Dinorá Justice uses a distinct visual vocabulary to examine intertwined histories of gender, landscape, and visual culture.
Ongoing - ‘Mondrian: Foundations’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition presents 28 paintings and works on paper, primarily from Mondrian’s early career, that trace the artist’s explorations as he progressed from realistic traditions to experimental abstractions.
Ongoing - ‘Comrade Sisters: Women of the Black Panther Party’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition brings together 27 powerful photographs by Stephen Shames that feature the women of the Black Panther party and showcase their crucial work for the movement.
Ongoing - ‘Thinking Small: Dutch Art to Scale’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring 15 intriguing objects from 17th-century Netherlands such as paintings, prints, silver medals, and books, this exhibition compels viewers to reconsider their relationship to the world around them.
Ongoing - ‘Marking Resilience: Indigenous North American Prints’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition features 30 newly acquired works by Indigenous artists from the United States and Canada who were inspired by the resilience and creativity of their cultures.
Ongoing - ‘Raqib Shaw: Ballads of East and West’ Exhibition @ ISG Museum Shaw’s images of magic and mystery combine Western artistic tradition with ornamental elements derived from the Japanese, Persian, and Indian cultures that he vividly remembers from his youth.
Ongoing - ‘Picasso: War, Combat, and Revolution’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the dictator Francisco Franco’s Spain, imagery of death, struggles of good and evil, political and artistic revolution, and issues of desire and capture.
Ongoing - ‘Our Time on Earth’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum This traveling exhibition from the Barbican Centre in London celebrates the power of global creativity to transform the conversation around the climate emergency.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

Enjoy everyone!

Live Music

FRIDAY - 03/08 - Dan + Shay @ Dickies Arena @ 7PM With Ben Rector & Hailey Whitters
FRIDAY - 03/08 - HEALTH @ The Factory in Deep Ellum @ 8PM With Pixel Grip & King Yosef
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Flipturn @ The Factory in Deep Ellum @ 8PM With Richy Mitch & The Coalminers
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Club 90s: 2000s Night @ House of Blues @ 8PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Indie-Rock Latin America 2024 @ Deep Ellum Art Co @ 8PM Featuring Estevie, Vanita Leo, Los Juanos, Ceci Ceci
FRIDAY - 03/08 - GRAVEDGR @ Stereo Live @ 10PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Emo Nite @ South Side Music Hall @ 9PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Guster @ Granada Theater @ 8:30PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Billy Allen & The Pollies @ Sundown at Granada @ 9:30PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - The Revelers Hall Band @ The Kessler @ 8PM
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Darkest Hour @ Trees @ 6PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Billy Joel & Stevie Nicks @ AT&T Stadium @ 7PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Hombres G @ Toyota Music Factory @ 8PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Bombay Bicycle Club @ Granada Theater @ 8PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Pacific Dub @ Sundown at Granada @ 9:30PM With Dale & The Zdubs
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Geek Music Festival @ The Factory in Deep Ellum @ 8PM Featuring BassJackers, Vinai, Sick Individuals, & more
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Skizzy Mars @ The Factory in Deep Ellum @ 8PM With Moonlander
SATURDAY - 03/09 - The Kills @ House of Blues @ 8PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ARMNHMR @ Stereo Live @ 10PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Municipal Waste @ Trees @ 7PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Los Lonely Boys @ The Echo Music Hall @ 7PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Bob Schneider @ The Kessler @ 6:30PM / 9:15PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Indie-Rock Latin America 2024 @ Deep Ellum Art Co @ 8PM Featuring JUANPALITOSCHINOS, PAHUENCHE, Pink Pablo, Glue Trip, Gran Moreno

Standup Comedy:

FRIDAY & SATURDAY - 03/08 - 03/09 - Emily Catalano Stand Up @ Dallas Comedy Club
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Tom Segura Comedy Show @ American Airlines Center @ 8PM
SUNDAY - 03/10 - Sofia Niño Comedy Show @ Music Hall at Fair Park @ 8PM
SUNDAY - 03/10 - Letterkenny: A Night of Stand Up @ The Factory in Deep Ellum @ 8PM
ALL WEEKEND - Michael Blackson Stand Up @ Addison Improv
ALL WEEKEND - JJ Williamson Stand Up @ Arlington Improv

Sports:

FRIDAY - 03/08 - WWE Friday Night Smackdown @ American Airlines Center @ 6:45PM See all your favorite superstars including The Rock, Roman Reigns, Cody Rhodes, and many others!
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - 03/09 - 03/10 - AAC Basketball Championships: Women @ Dickies Arena

Cultural and Theater:

FRIDAY - 03/08 - National Vocal Competition @ Winspear Opera House @ 7:30PM See and hear the best-of-the-best young talent compete on the Winspear stage for a chance to be discovered.
FRIDAY - 03/08 - Alan Cumming Live Show @ Moody Performance Hall @ 7PM / 9:30PM Tony-Award winning actor and singer Alan Cumming’s new show covers all the bases: sex, death and bacchanalia, with a set list as eclectic as the man himself.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Beethoven Lives Upstairs’ Theatrical Concert @ Bass Performance Hall @ 11AM Beethoven’s music, including the Moonlight Sonata, Fur Elise, and the great Fifth and Ninth Symphonies is woven into a dramatic theatrical performance about the composer’s fascinating live.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Sphinx Virtuosi Concert @ Meyerson Symphony Center @ 7:30PM Compromised of Black and Latinx artists, Sphinx Virtuosi boasts artistic excellence, pioneering programming and impassioned community engagement.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ‘Romeo and Juliet’ Opera @ Winspear Opera House @ 7:30PM Dallas Opera’s latest production presents Shakespeare’s greatest love story through new magnitude with Gounod’s rapturously romantic score.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ‘The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet’ Play @ Sanders Theater @ 8PM The 2024 Stolen Shakespeare Festival kicks off with one of the most famous love stories where two star crossed lovers dare risk everything for love.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ‘Every Brilliant Thing’ Performance With poignant humor and joy, this immersive theatrical experience takes the audience on a journey through grief, healing, falling in love, and rediscovering all that life has to give.
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - 03/09 - 03/10 - ‘Jackie’ Play @ Eisemann Center Actor Kait Haire portrays former First Lady Jackie Kennedy in a powerful and revealing narrative that begins on June 5, 1968, when she receives word of her brother-in-law Robert Kennedy’s assassination.
SUNDAY - 03/10 - KevOnStage & That Chick Angel Live Show @ Majestic Theatre @ 7:30PM
ALL WEEKEND - New New Festival Don’t miss DFW’s biggest music discovery event - see your favorite and up-and-coming musicians from around the world at different venues.
ALL WEEKEND - Chopin and Shostakovich in Concert @ Meyerson Symphony Center Full of poetry and passion, this program includes Chopin’s rhapsodic Concerto No. 1 and Shostakovich’s fierce Symphony No. 10.
ALL WEEKEND - John Williams Celebration Concert @ Bass Performance Hall FWSO performs an expansive tribute to Williams that includes music from ‘Hook,’ ‘Superman,’ ‘Schindler’s List,’ ‘Harry Potter,’ ‘Star Wars,’ and more.
ALL WEEKEND - ‘The Taming of the Shrew’ Play @ Wyly Theatre Shakespeare’s daring and controversial ‘The Taming of the Shrew’ is presented in the style of the 1950’s sitcom ‘I Love Lucy.’
ALL WEEKEND - ‘Much Ado About Nothing’ Play @ Sanders Theater Enjoy Shakespeare’s classic tale of young love, scandal, deception, and witty banter at the Stolen Shakespeare Guild’s Festival.

Experiences / Family:

FRIDAY - 03/08 - ‘Barbie’ Screening @ AT&T Discovery District @ 7PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - 03/08 - 03/09 - American Western Weekend @ Globe Life Field See 11 western sporting disciplines and hear the best live music entertainment, including performances by Post Malone and Luke Bryan.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Dallas Whiskey Riot 2024 @ Tower Building @ 4PM Attendees can try more than 200 whiskeys from local, national, and international brands while also enjoying creative whiskey cocktails, opportunities to meet master distillers, and more.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Palooza in the Park @ Fair Park @ 11AM This family-friendly celebration brings together organizations, artists, creatives, and small businesses from South Dallas, Pleasant Grove, and Oak Cliff.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - Family Weekends @ Sammons Park Bring the whole family for unique experiences at Sammons Park, including petting zoo, face painting, dance workshops, and amazing bites from local food trucks.
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ‘Captain Marvel’ Screening @ Klyde Warren Park @ 5:30PM
SATURDAY - 03/09 - ‘Hidden Figures’ Screening @ Klyde Warren Park @ 8PM
ALL WEEKEND - Jurassic Quest @ Centennial Hall Visit America’s largest traveling, interactive dinosaur experience and walk through 165 million years of the Triassic, Jurassic and Cretaceous periods.
DAILY - Dallas Blooms @ Dallas Arboretum and Botanical Garden The Dallas Arboretum celebrates spring with Southwest’s biggest annual floral festivals, showcasing more than 500,000 spring blooming bulbs.
DAILY - Dinosaurs Live! @ Heard Natural Science Museum & Wildlife Sanctuary Let your imagination run wild as you walk back in time and encounter a 46-foot T-Rex and ten new life-size animatronic dinosaurs.
DAILY - ‘T-Rex: The Ultimate Predator’ Exhibition @ Perot Museum Come explore the latest research and discoveries about tyrannosaurs, with an emphasis on the most famous and impressive member of the family — T. Rex.

Museum and Arts:

DAILY - ‘Black Cowboys: An American Story’ Exhibition @ FW Museum of Science and History This powerful exhibition features artifacts, photographs and documents depicting the work and life of Black men, women and children – enslaved and free – who labored on the ranches of Texas and participated on cattle drives.
DAILY - ‘The Impressionist Revolution: From Monet to Matisse’ Exhibition @ DMA The exhibition explores the fascinating story of Impressionism from its birth in 1874 to its legacy in the early 20th century and the revolutionary course it charted for modern art.
DAILY - ‘He Said/She Said: Contemporary Women Artists Interject’ Exhibition @ DMA Join contemporary women artists in questioning the myth of the sole male genius in an exhibition where contributions from male artists are strategically appropriated in order to create space for new, more inclusive narratives.
DAILY- ‘Tiffany Chung: Rise Into The Atmosphere’ Installation @ DMA Contending with current sociopolitical issues in relation to history and cultural memory, Chung’s practice documents and discusses the hidden histories of personal memory and experience.
DAILY - ‘Sensing Deep Space: Pandora’s Cluster’ Exhibition @ Eisemann Center An installation that transcends the realms of human capability, this exhibition offers visitors a unique chance to engage in the arts, science, and technology education while learning about space in a unique and profound way.

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THURSDAY - MARCH 7

Bruins vs Maple Leafs @ TD Garden @ 7PM
Free First Thursday @ ISG Museum @ 3PM
Jimbo’s Drag Circus Show @ House of Blues @ 7PM
‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ Play @ North Shore Music Theatre @ 7:30PM Experience one of Shakespeare’s most beloved comedies that features magical meddling, romantic tangles, and a play within a play for good measure.
A Celebration of Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga in Concert @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM Hear the duos Grammy Award-winning duet albums as well as Bennett’s signature songs and reimagined jazz-inflected covers of Gaga in this beautifully arranged concert.
BoCoCelli Concert @ MFA @ 6PM Eight spectacular cellists from the Boston Conservatory at Berklee aka BoCoCelli present a concert of exciting new music.
Candlelight: A Tribute to Taylor Swift @ Temple Ohabei Shalom @ 6:30PM / 8:45PM Hear your favorite Taylor Swift hits classically reimagined!
Rjd2 @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM With Haasan Barclay
Thievery Corporation @ Big Night Live @ 7PM
Louis Cole @ Royale @ 7PM With Chris Fishman & Nate Wood
The Snuts @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM
Glitterer @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM
Red Wanting Blue + The Trews @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

FRIDAY - MARCH 8

Masters of Illusion @ Hanover Theatre @ 7:30PM Starring the world’s greatest award-winning magicians, this 21st century magic show is filled with modern illusions and arts of deception.
Dick & Angel Strawbridge Live Show @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 7:30PM Escape To the Chateau’s very own Dick and Angel answer questions, play games, and share personal stories from 10 years of their hit show.
Jo Koy Comedy Show @ TD Garden @ 8PM
Marc Maron Stand Up @ Chevalier Theatre @ 7:30PM
Cuban Music: Arturo Sandoval & Pedrito Martinez in Concert @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM
The Kooks @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM With Vaccines
Okay Kaya @ ICA @ 8PM
Circles Around The Sun @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM With Mikaela Davis
Nurko @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
The Beaches @ Royale @ 7PM
McLusky @ The Sinclair @ 9PM With Martha's Vineyard Ferries & Minibeast
Natalie Cuomo & Dan LaMorte @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7:30PM
Tom Rush @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

SATURDAY - MARCH 9

Bruins vs Penguins @ TD Garden @ 3PM
BU Men’s Hockey vs Vermont @ Agganis Arena @ 4PM
Ongoing - Somerville Winter Farmers Market @ The Armory @ 9:30AM
2024 Oscar-Nominated Short Films Screenings @ ICA ICA presents its annual selection of Oscar-nominated live-action and animated shorts you always wish you’d seen come Oscar night.
David Nihill Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7PM
Martin Urbano Stand Up @ The Rockwell @ 9:30PM
Catherine Cohen Stand Up @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7:30PM
Flamenco Show ft. Alfonso Losa @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM Internationally renowned flamenco dancer and choreographer Losa performs Espacio Creativo, accompanied by live music.
Johnny Cash: The Official Concert Experience @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 8PM This concert experience brings songs and stories from the “Man in Black” to the stage in a way that audiences haven’t seen or heard before.
Celtic Music: Natalie MacMaster & Donnell Leahy @ Hanover Theatre @ 8PM
Bachman-Turner Overdrive @ Chevalier Theatre @ 8PM
TiaCorine @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM
Copilot @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Kaskade @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
Marc Broussard @ Royale @ 7PM
Em Beihold + Madelline @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
Paul Thorn & Steve Poltz @ City Winery @ 8PM

SUNDAY - MARCH 10

Michael Lenoci Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 7PM
The Life and Music of George Michael Concert @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 4PM This brand new concert show chronicles George Michael's incredible career, perfectly capturing his iconic sound and performance style.
Gala Flamenca @ Berklee Performance Center @ 7:30PM The show captures all the beauty, power, and passion of flamenco, starring two mavericks of the flamenco world, Manuel Liñán and Alfonso de Losa.
Jack Quartet @ ISG Museum @ 1:30PM
Bryce Vine @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM With Hoodie Allen
Alkaline Trio @ House of Blues @ 6:30PM With Drug Church
TALK @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM
Kid Bloom @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Mitch Rowland + Harris Harper @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
Laura Jane Grace @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7:30PM
Joan Osborne @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

ALL WEEKEND

THURSDAY & FRIDAY - Sam Morril Stand Up @ The Wilbur
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Kadeem Richardson & Khairy Creek Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
All weekend - NorthEast ComicCon & Collectibles Extravaganza @ Boxborough Don’t miss out on the 3 days of unique collector and fan experiences.
All weekend - Curling @ The Liberty Hotel Enjoy a winter Curling experience in the Liberty's private patio, complete with seasonal cocktails and bites.
All weekend - Plaza Winterfest @ Harvard Science Center Plaza Play seasonal games including curling, ice bowling, and ice shuffleboard or year-round favorites including ping-pong, illuminated cornhole, or giant chess!
All weekend - Music of the Midnight Sun: Peer Gynt @ Symphony Hall Enjoy a theatrical concert performance of the Norwegian fantastical epic tale ‘Peer Gynt’ written by playwright Henrik Ibsen and composer Edvard Grieg.
All weekend - ‘The Mad Ones’ Musical @ The Zack Box Theater Touching and humorous, this musical comedy follows a teenager Samantha Brown as she takes the courageous yet painful first steps into adulthood.
All weekend - ‘Queer Voices’ Play Festival @ BCA Plaza Theatre The Boston Theater Company’s annual festival showcases vibrant and diverse ten-minute plays by LGBTQ+ playwrights!
All weekend - ‘King Hedley II’ Play @ Hibernian Hall Actors’ Shakespeare Project takes on one of August Wilson’s powerful ‘The Pittsburgh Cycle’ plays, examining family tensions and the Black experience during Reagan America.
All weekend - ‘Becoming A Man’ Play @ Loeb Drama Center LAST CHANCE - American Repertory Theater’s newest production is an honest, passionate, and illuminating story of P. Carl’s courageous journey of gender transition and transformation.
All weekend - ‘Cost of Living’ Play @ Roberts Studio Theatre In this wry and quietly observed play, Polish-born playwright Martyna Majok interweaves the stories of four lonely souls to examine the forces that bring people together and the ways we all need each other.
All weekend - ‘Thirst’ Play @ Lyric Stage Tension, humor, and hope reside in this heartbreaking tale of love and belonging set during Eugene O’Neil’s classic ‘Long Day’s Journey Into Night.’
All weekend - ‘Stand Up If You’re Here Tonight’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre After sold out runs in LA, Chicago, and Paris, this thoroughly unique, interactive theatrical experience from Olivier Award-nominated John Kolvenbach comes to Boston.
All weekend - ‘John Proctor is the Villain’ Play @ The Huntington at the Calderwood Pavilion LAST CHANCE - Alternately touching and bitingly funny, this new comedy inspired by Arthur Miller’s classic ‘The Crucible’ follows a group of teenagers as they navigate love, authenticity, and transformation.
All weekend - ‘Twelfth Night’ Play @ Balch Arena Theater LAST CHANCE - ‘Twelfth Night’ is a rousing contemporary musical adaptation of Shakespeare’s classic romantic comedy about mistaken identity and self-discovery.

ONGOING

Ongoing - ‘Orchid Adventure’ Botanical Exhibition @ Franklin Park Zoo LAST CHANCE - From rare species to exotic hybrids, Orchid Adventure promises an immersive experience that combines the enchantment of the animal kingdom with the delicate beauty of orchids.
Ongoing - Winteractive @ Downtown This free, walkable art experience features 16 artworks and interactive play elements in downtown Boston.
Ongoing - Winter Sauna Experience @ Rose Kennedy Greenway Moki Winter Village is a unique wellness oasis featuring saunas and cold-plunge pools tucked away between the city’s skyscrapers.
Ongoing - ‘Deep Sky’ IMAX Screening @ MoS Go on a journey to the beginning of time and space, to never-before-seen cosmic landscapes as captured by NASA’s Webb Telescope in this new IMAX documentary.
Ongoing - Immersive Disney Animation @ Boch Center Step into the art and legacy of Walt Disney Animation Studios and celebrate the music, artistry and animation from the creators of Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Big Hero 6 and many more.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Lady Gaga, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium
Ongoing - ‘Wordplay’ Exhibition @ ICA Highlighting the rich interplay between imagery and text, the exhibition showcases how contemporary artists have played with words to animate and expand their art practices.
Ongoing - ‘ Dinorá Justice: The Lay of the Land’ Exhibition @ MFA In her multidisciplinary works, Brazilian American artist Dinorá Justice uses a distinct visual vocabulary to examine intertwined histories of gender, landscape, and visual culture.
Ongoing - ‘Mondrian: Foundations’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition presents 28 paintings and works on paper, primarily from Mondrian’s early career, that trace the artist’s explorations as he progressed from realistic traditions to experimental abstractions.
Ongoing - ‘Comrade Sisters: Women of the Black Panther Party’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition brings together 27 powerful photographs by Stephen Shames that feature the women of the Black Panther party and showcase their crucial work for the movement.
Ongoing - ‘Thinking Small: Dutch Art to Scale’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring 15 intriguing objects from 17th-century Netherlands such as paintings, prints, silver medals, and books, this exhibition compels viewers to reconsider their relationship to the world around them.
Ongoing - ‘Marking Resilience: Indigenous North American Prints’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition features 30 newly acquired works by Indigenous artists from the United States and Canada who were inspired by the resilience and creativity of their cultures.
Ongoing - ‘Raqib Shaw: Ballads of East and West’ Exhibition @ ISG Museum Shaw’s images of magic and mystery combine Western artistic tradition with ornamental elements derived from the Japanese, Persian, and Indian cultures that he vividly remembers from his youth.
Ongoing - ‘Picasso: War, Combat, and Revolution’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the dictator Francisco Franco’s Spain, imagery of death, struggles of good and evil, political and artistic revolution, and issues of desire and capture.
Ongoing - ‘Our Time on Earth’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum This traveling exhibition from the Barbican Centre in London celebrates the power of global creativity to transform the conversation around the climate emergency.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

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THURSDAY - FEBRUARY 22

Canon, Canyon, Cannon - Poetry Evening @ ISG Museum @ 8:30PM This annual poetry and performance evening features leading local and national artists who invite the audience to find new meaning through language and performance.
Art Lecture: New England Art in 19th and 20th Centuries @ MFA @ 1PM Learn about the fascinating history of New England art made between 19th and 20th century and how it reflects the social and political developments of the era.
‘The Persian Version’ Screening @ MFA @ 7PM Maryam Keshavarz’s award-winning new film delivers a universal and timely story of the Iranian and Iranian American experience with this crowd-pleasing comedy.
New England Synth Fest @ MOS @ 7:30PM Experience some of the region’s best synth musicians and visualizers like never before in the Planetarium’s immersive full dome environment.
Jazz Concert @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM The Berklee Global Jazz Institute Summit celebrates its 15th anniversary with a concert dedicated to the visionary and genius Wayne Shorter.
Rocky Dale Davis Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 8PM
Torrei Hart Stand Up @ City Winery @ 7:30PM
Portugal. The Man @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Snacktime
Evan Honer @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM With Jesse Woods
Joe Russo’s Selcouth Quartet @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM

FRIDAY - FEBRUARY 23

‘House’ Screening @ MFA @ 7PM See this 1970s Japanese hallucinatory and absurd thriller as part of the ‘UNIQLO Festival of Films from Japan’ limited program.
'Crown of Times' Show @ MoS @ 7:30PM ReRooted's popular production critically examines the history of Black Hair Culture over five decades and the influences of American politics, music, and fashion on shaping that culture.
Stardew Valley: Festival of Seasons in Concert @ Berklee Performance Center @ 4PM / 8PM Enjoy an intimate, immersive concert featuring fresh arrangements of the most cherished songs from the ‘Stardew Valley’ soundtrack, performed live by a chamber orchestra.
‘Giselle’ Ballet @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 7PM See the Grand Lyiv Ballet perform the timeless French masterpiece that has captured the hearts of audiences worldwide for over 180 years.
Patton Oswalt Comedy Show @ 7PM / 10PM
Jared Freid Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM / 10:30PM
Liza Treyger Stand Up @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7:30PM
Eric Bellinger @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM With Zae France
Tkay Maidza @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Timmy Trumpet @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM With Costa
The Kills @ Royale @ 8PM
Dance Yourself Clean: Indie Electronic Dance Party @ The Sinclair @ 10PM

SATURDAY - FEBRUARY 24

BU Men’s Hockey vs UConn @ Agganis Arena @ 7PM
Ongoing - Somerville Winter Farmers Market @ The Armory @ 9:30AM
Play Date: Caribbean Celebration @ ICA @ 10AM Enjoy art-making and gallery activities inspired by the art on view!
Ms. Pat Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7PM
Berg + Maher in Concert @ Symphony Hall @ 8PM Boston Philharmonic Orchestra plays Berg’s vigorous Violin Concerto and Mahler’s powerful Symphony No. 1.
Almost Queen: A Tribute to Queen @ The Hanover Theatre @ 8PM Enjoy the most authentic live Queen show since the days of Queen themselves.
Chelsea Cutler @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM
All The Feels Party @ House of Blues @ 8PM
Murda @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Tyler Booth @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM With Houston Bernard Band
Enanitos Verdes @ Big Night Live @ 6:30PM
KSHMR @ Big Night Live @ 11:30PM
Robyn Night @ The Sinclair @ 9PM
Rebirth Brass Band @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM
Willie Nile @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

SUNDAY - FEBRUARY 25

Off Book: The Improvised Musical @ Crystal Ballroom @ 7PM Versatile musical comedy duo Jessica McKenna and Zach Reino create a completely improvised musical live on stage.
Lil Tecca @ MGM Music Hall @ 7:30PM With SoFaygo
Code Orange @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM With Teenage Wrist, Soul Blind, Gel, & Gridiron
Jane Remover & quannic @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Younger Mountain String Band @ Big Night Live @ 8PM
Tanner Usrey @ The Sinclair @ 8PM

ALL WEEKEND

FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Shuler King Stand Up @ Laugh Boston
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Nick Sullivan Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
FRIDAY & SUNDAY - Haydn, Mozart, von Bingen, & Aleotti in Concert @ Symphony Hall Boston music lovers, mark your calendars: Harry Christophers returns to Handel + Haydn Society in his first appearance as Conductor Laureate, with the music he does best.
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - ‘The Simon & Garfunkel Story’ in Concert @ Emerson Colonial Theatre ‘The Simon & Garfunkel Story’ is a critically acclaimed concert-style theater show about two young boys from Queens, New York who went on to become the world’s most successful music duo of all time.
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - ‘The More The Man’ Play @ BCA Plaza Black Box Theatre A love letter to New Orleans, the play follows a young Black man as he connects to the ancestors of the land and lineage, while navigating the highs and lows of romantic and familial love.
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - Brighton Bazaar: Retromania Market @ Roadrunner Retromania is a weekend-long Retrospective Expo, featuring over 100 vendors showcasing the best vintage styles, collectible classics, & nostalgic goods New England has to offer!
All weekend - Plaza Winterfest @ Harvard Science Center Plaza Play seasonal games including curling, ice bowling, and ice shuffleboard or year-round favorites including ping-pong, illuminated cornhole, or giant chess!
All weekend - Curling @ The Liberty Hotel Enjoy a winter Curling experience in the Liberty's private patio, complete with seasonal cocktails and bites.
All weekend - 2024 Oscar-Nominated Short Films Screenings @ ICA ICA presents its annual selection of Oscar-nominated live-action, animated, and documentary shorts you always wish you’d seen come Oscar night.
All weekend - Disney On Ice @ TD Garden Celebrate the unforgettable adventures of your favorite Disney and Pixar characters brought to life in new magical ways.
All weekend - Boston Ballet’s Winter Experience @ Citizens Bank Opera House Boston Ballet presents an unforgettable celebration of dance that includes new, world-premier and re-envisioned productions from award-winning choreographers.
All weekend - ‘Evil Dead’ Musical @ BCA Plaza Theatre LAST CHANCE - Join the gory, yet campy adventures of five college students on a weekend getaway in Michigan as they battle the demons and deadites.
All weekend - ‘Becoming A Man’ Play @ Loeb Drama Center American Repertory Theater’s newest production is an honest, passionate, and illuminating story of P. Carl’s courageous journey of gender transition and transformation.
All weekend - ‘Thirst’ Play @ Lyric Stage Tension, humor, and hope reside in this heartbreaking tale of love and belonging set during Eugene O’Neil’s classic ‘Long Day’s Journey Into Night.’
All weekend - ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ Play @ The Hanover Theatre Experience Brendon Fox’s adaptation of Shakespeare’s most famous romantic comedy performed by The Hanover Theatre Conservatory's Youth Acting Company.
All weekend - ‘Stand Up If You’re Here Tonight’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre After sold out runs in LA, Chicago, and Paris, this thoroughly unique, interactive theatrical experience from Olivier Award-nominated John Kolvenbach comes to Boston.
All weekend - ‘John Proctor is the Villain’ Play @ The Huntington at the Calderwood Pavilion Alternately touching and bitingly funny, this new comedy inspired by Arthur Miller’s classic ‘The Crucible’ follows a group of teenagers as they navigate love, authenticity, and transformation.
All weekend - ‘Sweat’ Play @ Footlight Club LAST CHANCE - Filled with warm humor, ‘Sweat’ tells the story of a group of friends who have spent their lives sharing drinks, secrets, and laughs while working together on the factory floor.

ONGOING

Ongoing - ‘Orchid Adventure’ Botanical Exhibition @ Franklin Park Zoo From rare species to exotic hybrids, Orchid Adventure promises an immersive experience that combines the enchantment of the animal kingdom with the delicate beauty of orchids.
Ongoing - ‘Deep Sky’ IMAX Screening @ MoS Go on a journey to the beginning of time and space, to never-before-seen cosmic landscapes as captured by NASA’s Webb Telescope in this new IMAX documentary.
Ongoing - Immersive Disney Animation @ Boch Center Step into the art and legacy of Walt Disney Animation Studios and celebrate the music, artistry and animation from the creators of Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Big Hero 6 and many more.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Lady Gaga, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium
Ongoing - ‘Wordplay’ Exhibition @ ICA Highlighting the rich interplay between imagery and text, the exhibition showcases how contemporary artists have played with words to animate and expand their art practices.
Ongoing - ‘Forecast Form: Art in the Caribbean Diaspora, 1990s - Today’ Exhibition @ ICA LAST CHANCE - Anchored in the concept of diaspora, the exhibition surveys the works of 28 artists of Caribbean descent and aims to challenge conventions and propose new ways of looking at and understanding the region.
Ongoing - ‘ Dinorá Justice: The Lay of the Land’ Exhibition @ MFA In her multidisciplinary works, Brazilian American artist Dinorá Justice uses a distinct visual vocabulary to examine intertwined histories of gender, landscape, and visual culture.
Ongoing - ‘Mondrian: Foundations’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition presents 28 paintings and works on paper, primarily from Mondrian’s early career, that trace the artist’s explorations as he progressed from realistic traditions to experimental abstractions.
Ongoing - ‘Comrade Sisters: Women of the Black Panther Party’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition brings together 27 powerful photographs by Stephen Shames that feature the women of the Black Panther party and showcase their crucial work for the movement.
Ongoing - ‘Thinking Small: Dutch Art to Scale’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring 15 intriguing objects from 17th-century Netherlands such as paintings, prints, silver medals, and books, this exhibition compels viewers to reconsider their relationship to the world around them.
Ongoing - ‘Marking Resilience: Indigenous North American Prints’ Exhibition @ MFA The exhibition features 30 newly acquired works by Indigenous artists from the United States and Canada who were inspired by the resilience and creativity of their cultures.
Ongoing - ‘Picasso: War, Combat, and Revolution’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the dictator Francisco Franco’s Spain, imagery of death, struggles of good and evil, political and artistic revolution, and issues of desire and capture.
Ongoing - ‘Our Time on Earth’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum NEW - This traveling exhibition from the Barbican Centre in London celebrates the power of global creativity to transform the conversation around the climate emergency.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

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THURSDAY - FEBRUARY 15th

Intermixed Party @ MCA @ 5PM Visit the museum after-hours for MCA’s monthly sunset series Intermixed: Beats, Bites, & Bevs.
John Novosad Stand Up @ Comedy Works Downtown @ 7:30PM
Charlie Berens Comedy Show @ Paramount Theatre @ 7PM
Bailey Zimmerman @ Fillmore Auditorium @ 7:30PM
Sugar Nova @ Meow Wolf @ 8PM
Wilkinson @ The Church Nightclub @ 9PM
Tourist & Amtrac @ Gothic Theatre @ 8PM With Weir
Trousdale @ Bluebird Theater @ 8PM With Abbey Cone
Haken @ Boulder Theater @ 8PM
The High Lines + Beggars Union @ Fox Theatre @ 8PM
Alfred and The Teddinators @ Globe Hall @ 8PM

FRIDAY - FEBRUARY 16th

Candlelight: Magical Movie Soundtracks in Concert @ Kirk of Highland @ 6:30PM / 8:45PM Hear your favorite music from ‘Cinderella,’ ‘Up,’ ‘The Lion King,’ ‘The Avengers,’ and much more!
Charlie Berens Comedy Show @ Paramount Theatre @ 7PM
Club 90s: 2000s Night @ Summit @ 8:30PM
Kxllswxtch @ Marquis Theater @ 7PM
Mighty Poplar @ Ogden Theatre @ 8PM With Noam Pikelny, Chris Eldridge, Andrew Marlin, & Greg Garrison
Beltran + ChaseWest @ Meow Wolf @ 9PM
Sarah Jarosz @ Gothic Theatre @ 8PM With The Ballroom Thieves
Space 92 @ Temple @ 10PM
Lee Foss @ The Church Nightclub @ 9PM
Dogs in a Pile @ Bluebird Theater @ 8PM With Squeaky Feet
Yo La Tengo @ Boulder Theater @ 8PM
Minnesota @ Fox Theatre @ 8PM
Never Ending Fall @ Globe Hall @ 8PM
Sturtz & Natalie Spears @ Chautauqua Community House @ 8PM
The Bluelligans & Danny D @ Moxi Theater @ 7:30PM

SATURDAY - FEBRUARY 17th

Jeremy Jordan @ Lone Tree Arts Center @ 8PM
Tony Hinchcliffe Stand Up @ Paramount Theatre @ 7PM
Lost Frequencies @ Fillmore Auditorium @ 7PM
Plain White T’s @ Summit @ 7PM
The Lagoons @ Marquis Theater @ 7PM
Dirtwire @ Mission Ballroom @ 7PM With Moontricks, Gone Gone Beyond, & Honeycomb
ISOxo @ Ogden Theatre @ 8:30PM With yojas, DRYDEN, & VAVN
Early Eyes + Trash Panda @ Meow Wolf @ 8PM
Pauly D @ Temple @ 10PM
Dogs in a Pile @ Bluebird Theater @ 8PM With Squeaky Feet
Sarah Jarosz @ Boulder Theater @ 8PM
SABAI @ Fox Theatre @ 9PM
Jeremy Albino @ Globe Hall @ 8PM
Danno Simpson & Kade Hoffm @ Moxi Theater @ 8PM

SUNDAY - FEBRUARY 18th

Avalanche vs Coyotes @ Ball Arena @ 4PM
Great Britain’s Musical Heritage in Concert @ Boettcher Concert Hall @ 2:30PM Denver Young Artists Orchestra pays outstanding tribute program to the rich British musical heritage with their signature contemporary twist.
Ben Roy Stand Up @ Comedy Works South @ 7PM
‘Lord of the Dance’ Performance @ Paramount Theatre @ 7:30PM Enjoy Michael Flatley’s world-renowned and unforgettable Irish dance production.
‘The Newest Olympian’ & ‘Potterless’ Podcasts Live @ Marquis Theater @ 3:30PM / 7PM Catch your favorite book podcasts on live stage!
Grieves @ Bluebird Theater @ 8PM With Mouse Powell, Marley B, & DJ Hoppa
MarchFourth @ Boulder Theater @ 8PM
Thunderboogie @ Globe Hall @ 8PM

All Weekend

FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Annie Lederman Stand Up @ Comedy Works Downtown
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Raekwon & Colorado Symphony in Concert @ Boettcher Concert Hall Wu-Tang Clan’s own Raekwon, RZA, & Ghostface Killah reimagine their timeless album ‘Only Built 4 Cuban Linx’ in new renditions together with the Colorado Symphony.
All weekend - Midwinter Bluegrass Festival @ Northglenn This favorite winter picker's festival brings national and regional acts to Denver on Presidents' Day Weekend since 1986.
All weekend - CHSAA State Wrestling Championship @ Ball Arena
All weekend - Gary Gulman Stand Up @ Comedy Works South
All weekend - The Improvised Shakespeare Company Comedy Show @ Garner Galleria Theatre The dazzling players create a brand new, fully improvised masterpiece right before your eyes. Enjoy an evening of spontaneous comedy featuring the language and themes of William Shakespeare!
All weekend - ‘Message In A Bottle’ Dance-Theater Show @ Buell Theatre NEW - With a mix of exhilarating dance styles, high-energy footwork and breathtaking athleticism, ‘Message In A Bottle’ tells a unifying and uplifting story of humanity and hope.
All weekend - ‘Natasha, Pierre, and The Great Comet of 1812’ Musical @ Arvada Center NEW - Nominated for 12 Tony-awards upon its roaring premiere, this musical extravaganza combines the unimaginable - electropop tunes with the scandalous slice of Tolstoy’s ‘War and Peace.’
All weekend - 'The Legend of Georgia McBride' Play @ Vintage Theatre NEW - With snappy zingers and dance-worthy numbers, this wildly entertaining story challenges our perceptions of identity and classic gender roles with extraordinary humor and depth.
All weekend - ‘Fun Home’ Musical @ Vintage Theatre LAST CHANCE - Winner of the 2015 Best Musical Tony Award and adapted from Alison Bechdel’s graphic novel, this riveting musical follows Alison’s fascinating journey through adolescence.
All weekend - ‘A Year with Frog and Toad’ Family-Friendly Musical @ Arvada Center Arnold Lobel's treasured characters hop from page to stage in a story of friendship and adventure.
All weekend - ‘Rubicon’ Play @ Kilstrom Theatre Based on a true story of Elizabeth Pack, ‘Rubicon’ tracks the thrilling career of one of history’s most effective spies.
All weekend - ‘Cebollas’ Play @ Singleton Theatre New Mexican culture and the immutable bond of sisterhood take center stage in this outlandish comedy, which received stellar audience response at the 2022 Colorado New Play Summit.
All weekend - ‘The Nacirema Society’ CFU John Hand Theater Taking place in 1960s revolutionary America, this warm and funny play embraces a personal story of love, family drama, and chaos of the everyday life.

Ongoing

Ongoing - Ice Castles @ Cripple Creek See incredible sculptures and spaces built from ice as one of Colorado’s favorite traditions is back for another season.
Ongoing - ‘Space Explorers: The Infinite’ Immersive Experience @ Stanley Marketplace Embark on an immersive excursion through new breathtaking videos that reveal the many wonders of space exploration.
Ongoing - ‘The Berlin Airlift: Supplies from the Sky’ Exhibition @ Wings Museum The exhibit shares the lessons of courage, perseverance, and the triumph of the human spirit and pays tribute to the brave citizens who risked their lives to bring hope to a divided city.
Ongoing - 'Spookadelia' Immersive Show @ Spectra Art Space 'Spookadelia: Doubt’s Echo' is an all-ages narrative-driven psychedelic immersive art, theatrical, and highly interactive experience.
Ongoing - Colorado Scholastic Art & Writing Awards Showcase @ DAM See projects from the annual Scholastic Art & Writing Awards, nation’s longest-running and most prestigious recognition program for creative teens.
Ongoing - ‘All Stars: Artists from The Phillips Collection’ Exhibition @ DAM With works by more than 50 artists including Benny Andrews, Childe Hassam, Jacob Lawrence, Georgia O'Keeffe, Jackson Pollock, and more, the show explores important American art from the end of the nineteenth century to contemporary times.
Ongoing - ‘Amoako Boafo: Soul of Black Folks’ Exhibition @ DAM LAST CHANCE - One of the most acclaimed artists of his generation, Boafo’s works focus the viewers’ gaze on his subjects’ presence through his portraits representing Black life.
Ongoing - ‘The Russells in Denver, 1921’ Exhibition @ DAM Charles M. Russel’s works capture the vast landscapes, mountain ranges, and peoples of the American West of the 1880s, thus leaving a valuable chronicle of the West that once was.
Ongoing - ‘Personal Geographies’ Exhibition @ DAM The exhibition presents a selection of images by two artists - Trent Davis Bailey and Brian Adams who seek to understand themselves and the places they treasure though photography.
Ongoing - ‘Cowboy’ Exhibition @ MCA LAST CHANCE - Consisting of works from Asian American, Latinx, and Native artists, this exhibition aims to shift the narratives around the idea of a ‘cowboy,’ adding more creativity, historical accuracy, and nuance.
Ongoing - ‘Performing Self’ Exhibition @ Boulder Museum of Contemporary ArtThis exhibition provides a look into how seven multidisciplinary artists celebrate the mutability of self-identity through the embodiment of alter egos or personae.

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FRIDAY - FEBRUARY 9th

Lunar New Year Festival @ Town Center at Aurora @ 4:30PM Immerse yourself in the festivities with enchanting lion and dragon dances, engaging traditional crafts for kids, and a feast of mouthwatering Asian cuisine.
Fortune Feimster Comedy Show @ Paramount Theatre @ 7PM / 9:30PM Affable, charismatic and one of a kind, Fortune Feimster brings her best comedy for a night in Denver.
Neyla Pekarek & Friends @ MCA @ 7PM Neyla Pekarek, formerly of The Lumineers, takes the stage with her band, featuring Shawn King of DeVotchKa, as well as Denver jazz giants Annie Booth, Kim Bird, and Brian Cronan.
Dime Dee @ Summit @ 7PM
Robert Jon and The Wreck @ Marquis Theater @ 8PM
Magic City Hippies @ Mission Ballroom @ 8PM With The Palms & Josh Fudge
Crosses @ Ogden Theatre @ 8PM With DJ Crook
YehMe2 @ Temple @ 10PM
JVNA @ The Church Nightclub @ 9PM
RJD2 @ Fox Theatre @ 9PM With Sassfactory & deejay Green Thumbz
DirtySnatcha + Stickybuds @ Moxi Theater @ 7:30PM

SATURDAY - FEBRUARY 10th

Colorado Chinese New Year Celebration @ George Washington High School @ 10:30AM Denver Chinese School continues its annual celebration complete with a cultural fair, traditional cuisine, and marketplace.
Denver Mardi Gras @ DoubleTree Hotel Greenwood Village @ 7PM Experience the thrill of Denver Mardi Gras! Hotel takeover with private balconies, live bands, DJs, burlesque, and more!
Cockpit Demo Day @ Wings Museum @ 10AM Get an up close look inside select aircrafts and learn all about their history, instruments, and controls!
‘Little Bit of Love’ Art Show & Opening Event @ Spectra Art Space @ 5PM Visit this annual art pop up full of special artworks, live music, astrology readings, and so much more!
Candlelight: A Tribute to Fleetwood Mac @ Trinity United Methodist Church @ 6:30PM / 9PM Enjoy the best of Fleetwood Mac in classical interpretation played by a piano and violin duo.
International Guitar Night @ Lone Tree Arts Center @ 8PM
The Kills @ Summit @ 9PM
SOJA @ Fillmore Auditorium @ 7PM With HIRIE & Likkle Jordee
Cory Wong @ Mission Ballroom @ 8PM With Monica Martin & LA LOM
Jessica Audiffred @ Ogden Theatre @ 9PM With Modestep, YDG, & Youth In Circles
Hot Chip @ Meow Wolf @ 9PM
Lost Kings @ Temple @ 10PM
The Music of Blink-182 & More for Kids @ Bluebird Theater @ 11:30AM *Presented by The Rock & Roll Playhouse
Mile High Mardi Gras Mambo @ Bluebird Theater @ 8PM Featuring Rootbeer Richie & The Reveille, Los Mocochetes, May Be Fern, & more!
John Craigie @ Fox Theatre @ 8PM With Daniel Rodriguez
Sunny Sweeney @ Moxi Theater @ 8PM

SUNDAY - FEBRUARY 11th

Orchid Day @ Denver Botanic Gardens @ 10AM Celebrate all things orchids with family-friendly education and hands-on activities throughout the Gardens.
Nate Smith @ Gothic Theatre @ 7:30PM
Earth to Aaron @ Globe Hall @ 5PM
Tractorbeam @ Fox Theatre @ 9:30PM

All weekend

THURSDAY & FRIDAY - One More Time: Daft Punk Tribute @ Meow Wolf @ 9PM Lose yourself in dance as the world-renowned One More Time perform the best of Daft Punk.
THURSDAY & FRIDAY - John Vincent III @ Bluebird Theater
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Cold War Kids @ Gothic Theatre @ 9PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Drunken Hearts @ Globe Hall @ 8PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - The Disco Biscuits @ Boulder Theater @ 6:30PM With Cloudchord
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - Lunar New Year Celebration @ Far East Center Head to the Far East Center for the largest Lunar New Year event in the area, featuring traditional ceremonies, performances, and a lively, festive atmosphere.
All weekend - Monster Jam @ Ball Arena The most unexpected, unscripted and unforgettable motorsports experience for families and fans in the world today returns to Denver for an adrenaline-charged weekend.
All weekend - Mini Market @ Mercury Cafe Shop from your favorite local small businesses just in time for Valentine's Day.
All weekend - Lil Sasquatch & Francis Ellis Stand Up @ Comedy Works Downtown
All weekend - Christopher Titus Stand Up @ Comedy Works South
All weekend - Beethoven Piano Concerto No.2 in Concert @ Boettcher Concert Hall Music Director of the San Francisco Opera Eun Sun Kim leads the orchestra in a vibrant and memorable concert of Beethoven, Debussy, and Sibelius.
All weekend - ‘Jekyll & Hyde’ Ballet @ Ellie Caulkins Opera House LAST CHANCE - Inspired by the classic Gothic novella and set to the music of Chopin and Penderecki, choreographer Val Caniparoli’s ballet production explores the human psyche and capacity for both good and evil.
All weekend - The Improvised Shakespeare Company Comedy Show @ Garner Galleria Theatre The dazzling players create a brand new, fully improvised masterpiece right before your eyes. Enjoy an evening of spontaneous comedy featuring the language and themes of William Shakespeare!
All weekend - ‘Fun Home’ Musical @ Vintage Theatre Winner of the 2015 Best Musical Tony Award and adapted from Alison Bechdel’s graphic novel, this riveting musical follows Alison’s fascinating journey through adolescence.
All weekend - ‘A Year with Frog and Toad’ Family-Friendly Musical @ Arvada Center Arnold Lobel's treasured characters hop from page to stage in a story of friendship and adventure.
All weekend - ‘Rubicon’ Play @ Kilstrom Theatre Based on a true story of Elizabeth Pack, ‘Rubicon’ tracks the thrilling career of one of history’s most effective spies.
All weekend - ‘Cebollas’ Play @ Singleton Theatre New Mexican culture and the immutable bond of sisterhood take center stage in this outlandish comedy, which received stellar audience response at the 2022 Colorado New Play Summit.
All weekend - ‘Truth Be Told’ Play @ Curious Theatre LAST CHANCE - Step into the World Premiere of this riveting theatrical experience, where truth becomes both a beacon and a shadow, and two mothers are forced to navigate extraordinary circumstances.
All weekend - ‘The Nacirema Society’ CFU John Hand Theater Taking place in 1960s revolutionary America, this warm and funny play embraces a personal story of love, family drama, and chaos of the everyday life.

Ongoing

Ongoing - Ice Castles @ Cripple Creek See incredible sculptures and spaces built from ice as one of Colorado’s favorite traditions is back for another season.
Ongoing - McGregor Skating Rink @ McGregor Square @ 6:30PM Open daily, McGregor Skate is the perfect winter activity for guests of all ages.
Ongoing - ‘Space Explorers: The Infinite’ Immersive Experience @ Stanley Marketplace Embark on an immersive excursion through new breathtaking videos that reveal the many wonders of space exploration.
Ongoing - ‘The Berlin Airlift: Supplies from the Sky’ Exhibition @ Wings Museum The exhibit shares the lessons of courage, perseverance, and the triumph of the human spirit and pays tribute to the brave citizens who risked their lives to bring hope to a divided city.
Ongoing - 'Spookadelia' Immersive Show @ Spectra Art Space 'Spookadelia: Doubt’s Echo' is an all-ages narrative-driven psychedelic immersive art, theatrical, and highly interactive experience.
Ongoing - Colorado Scholastic Art & Writing Awards Showcase @ DAM NEW - See projects from the annual Scholastic Art & Writing Awards, nation’s longest-running and most prestigious recognition program for creative teens.
Ongoing - ‘All Stars: Artists from The Phillips Collection’ Exhibition @ DAM With works by more than 50 artists including Benny Andrews, Childe Hassam, Jacob Lawrence, Georgia O'Keeffe, Jackson Pollock, and more, the show explores important American art from the end of the nineteenth century to contemporary times.
Ongoing - ‘Amoako Boafo: Soul of Black Folks’ Exhibition @ DAM One of the most acclaimed artists of his generation, Boafo’s works focus the viewers’ gaze on his subjects’ presence through his portraits representing Black life.
Ongoing - ‘The Russells in Denver, 1921’ Exhibition @ DAM Charles M. Russel’s works capture the vast landscapes, mountain ranges, and peoples of the American West of the 1880s, thus leaving a valuable chronicle of the West that once was.
Ongoing - ‘Personal Geographies’ Exhibition @ DAM The exhibition presents a selection of images by two artists - Trent Davis Bailey and Brian Adams who seek to understand themselves and the places they treasure though photography.
Ongoing - ‘Cowboy’ Exhibition @ MCA Consisting of works from Asian American, Latinx, and Native artists, this exhibition aims to shift the narratives around the idea of a ‘cowboy,’ adding more creativity, historical accuracy, and nuance.
Ongoing - ‘Performing Self’ Exhibition @ Boulder Museum of Contemporary ArtThis exhibition provides a look into how seven multidisciplinary artists celebrate the mutability of self-identity through the embodiment of alter egos or personae.

Events are listed by the day. Events that happen every week appear first, one time stuff after that. If you have anything you’d like people to know about, comment here or message me and I’ll add it in. If you’d like further info about any of the events, look it up! I usually don’t have any extra to add.
Large Scale, Ongoing, and Multi-Day Events

Local Running, Walking, and Biking Info: https://troubleafoot.blogspot.com/
Guided Paddling Outings all around the area: https://www.facebook.com/hsmithoutdoors
Tallahassee Film Society Showings: https://www.tallahasseefilms.com/tickets/
Live Theater:

• Making Light Productions: https://www.makinglightproductions.org/
  
• Theatre Tallahassee: https://theatretallahassee.org/
  
• Mickee Faust Club: https://www.mickeefaust.com/
  
• Monticello Opera House: https://www.monticellooperahouse.org/
  
• FSU School of Theatre: https://theatre.fsu.edu/productions/
  
• Young Actors Theatre: https://www.youngactorstheatre.com/
  
• Quincy Music Theatre: https://quincymusictheatre.com/
  
• Tallahassee Hispanic Theater: https://tallahasseehispanictheater.wordpress.com/
  

OutdooFarmer’s Markets:

• Lake Ella Grower's Market: Wednesday and Saturday, 11am-2pm. You can always find organic vendors, and foragers: The Holistic Cannabis Community, Artzi Farms, Hickory Nut Gifts, and others. Including Pita Queen! Farmer's Market Nutrition Program Coupons gladly accepted!
  
• Frenchtown Heritage Market: 524 N MLK Jr Blvd. Third Saturday of the month 10am to 2pm. Come grow community and support your local farmers and makers, while you get your groceries for the week! Don’t forget! We match SNAP/EBT, so you DOUBLE your money to go towards locally grown fresh fruits and vegetables! If the guy with the pineapple is there, get it. This is currently only happening on the third Saturday of the month for the next few months while road work is completed.
  
• Tallahassee Farmers Market: 2904 Kerry Forest Pkwy, Saturdays, 8am to Noon. Come see us at Tallahassee's longest-running farmers market! We are a year-round market, featuring local farms and vendors that provide the best seasonal produce, meats, baked goods, and more. We welcome you and your whole family (leashed pets included) to come out and meet your local farmers! Ample parking is available between our lot and the shopping center lot next door (by Red Elephant). Come early for the best selection.
  

THURSDAY, 2/8

• The Hub at Feather Oaks: Bingo. 6pm
  
• Dreamland BBQ: Weekly Open Blues Jam. If you'd like to sing, please bring your own mic. 6pm
  
• Honest Living Vape: Chess-Master Thursdays . Beginners and experts, join us every Thursday from 6-9 for Chess-Master Thursdays. All ages. Bring your board or play ours! Tournaments coming soon! 6pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Co: Open Mic Night! Join us on Thursdays from 6:30-9:30 PM for Open Mic Night hosted by the incredible Mike Ingram of The Brown Goose! This is your chance to show off your skills! Whether you're a musician, poet, comedian, or have a hidden talent, we can't wait to see what you bring to the stage. 6:30pm
  
• Lake Tribe III: Trivia. 7pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Karaoke with Jared Walker. 7pm
  
• Smitty's Taphouse: Trivia Lab Thursdays. Teams of 6 or fewer players can compete for $30 / $20 / $10 Prizes + The Golden MacGuffin prize table! New format! Interactive smartphone answering for your comfort and safety! 6 Fun Rounds - 42 Total Questions. 7:30pm
  
• Cap City Video Lounge: Kitten with a Whip! MST3K Thursday. Join us Thursday as we climb aboard The Satellite of Love along with Joel, Tom Servo and CROOOOW for a single dose of Mystery Science Theater 3000 this evening as the gent and the bots crack wise over that forehead slapping, anxiety provoking, naive politician vs. shapely young teen extortionist thriller, KITTEN WITH A WHIP! starring Ann-Margret and John Forsythe! 8pm/free but donations encouraged
  
• Studio D: Bachata Fever. We always have a bachata workshop at 8 pm before Bachata Fever. We dance afterwards to the sounds of DJ Bacharod. The class is at 8 pm and Bachata Fever will start at 930 pm. Many times people are learning in class and may feel uncomfortable social dancing while they are still learning moves. We have a welcoming environment so stay and have fun and dance with everyone. That is how we learn. 8pm/Class $5/Bachata Fever $5.
  
• Blue Tavern: Free Jazz Thursday with the Longineu Parsons Trio. 8pm
  
• Fire Bettys: Good Gamer – Gaming Competition. Calling all gamers! Do you have what it takes to become the reigning champion of Fire Betty’s? Join us every Thursday for an evening of GGs and QQs, and battle it out head to head on the big screen, playing your favorite Switch classics to see who will come out on top. Winner receives a $100 Fire Betty’s Gift Card. 8pm
  
• 926: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• Bird’s: Karaoke with Nathan. 9pm
  

• Blue Tavern: Mes Amis. 5pm
  
• Cap City Video Lounge: Learn Burlesque: Classes at Cap City Video Lounge. Expand yourself in 2024! Y'all have been asking, and I've finally found a great place to teach classes! Join me for a one hour class in which we'll learn a short chunk of choreography that takes us through the basics of the art form. As classes continue, we'll hopefully be focusing on more specific skillsets in each class, but this first class is just to dip our toes in, and will be a more general introduction. 6pm
  
• The Moon: Billy Dean and Brothers Vanlandingham with special guests Baby Gray. 6:30pm
  
• Retrofit Records: Retrofit Records x FSU College of Law Presents: “Public Records” – A Conversation on Entertainment, Art, and Music Law featuring Professor Rob McNeely, Professor Jake Linford, Sharod Bines, and Saira Anderson. 7pm
  
• Tally Cat Café: Jackbox Games Night. 7pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Robynn O’Leary’s Birthday Show with Barry Sager and Rob Shaffer. 7pm
  
• 926: Connor Kelly & The Time Warp with Sofia Camille, Bench Warmer, and On The Edge. 8pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Free Jazz Five Buck Thursdays Presents: Reinterpretations – New Conceptions of the Music of Miles Davis, Wayne Shorter, & Herbie Hancock performed by Longineu Parsons, Brian Hall, & Michael Bakan. 8pm
  

FRIDAY, 2/9

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour with Two Clever. 5pm
  
• Lake Tribe Brewing: Flannel Fridays with Live Music. 6pm
  
• Hobbit West: Friday Night Dart Tournament. Anyone can Enter! Sign ups at 7:30, Darts fly at 8:00/$10 entry fee
  
• Ouzts Too: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 8pm
  
• Just One More: Karaoke with DJ Rah. 9pm-11pm/21+
  
• 926: The Hot Friday Night Party and Drag Show. 9pm/$5/18+
  

• Lake Tribe: Steven Brown. 5:30pm
  
• RA Gray Building, Heritage Hall Auditorium: Black History Arts and Culture Festival. Live performances from Avis Berry and Revival, Ayoka Afrikan Drum and Dance, and the Omega Lamplighters' The Mighty Light Step Team. This community festival celebrates the achievements of Black Floridians and will showcase the rich tapestry of Black Arts and Artists in Florida. Bring your family and friends to enjoy music, vendors, food, community partners, and more. Event is FREE and open and to the public. 5:30pm-9pm
  
• Pedros: Phillip Adams. 5:30pm
  
• The Getaway Grill and Bar: Connor Churchill. 6pm
  
• Club Downunder: CDU Presents: almost monday with buko boys. 7pm
  
• Turner Auditorium: The Complete Works of Shakespeare (abridged) [revised] (again). Three actors attempt to perform all of Shakespeare’s plays in 97 minutes: hilarity ensues! This production of the worldwide comedy phenomenon features an updated script, stars local professional talent, and is directed by SSC Artistic Director James Alexander Bond. 7pm/tickets through https://southernshakes.org/complete-works-abridged/
  
• Blue Tavern: Songwriters in the Round featuring the songs of Dennis Dunn as performed by Deb Berlinger, Jon Copps, Bobby Cutts, Danny Goddard, Carrie Hamby, AnnErice Heerema, Dave Leoprati, Mark Patton, Shanice Richards, and Brian Zinsmeister. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: The Medicinal 3 & The Residency. 8pm
  
• Vino Beano: 2nd Birthday Party. Let's get this party started! You are invited to our 2nd Birthday Party on Friday, February 9th. Get ready to dance the night away with DJ 24, sing your heart out with karaoke, and enjoy exclusive birthday specials. Don't miss out on the chance to win our birthday basket raffle. Entries will be accepted all day, but you must be present to win. For the perfect birthday toast, join us from 10pm to 11pm for free Wine on Tap. And end the night on a good note by spinning the wheel for exclusive coupons from 11pm to 12am. 8pm
  

SATURDAY, 2/10

• Brinkley Glen Park: Invasive Plant Removal. Join Master Gardener Volunteers at this weekly invasive plant removal event. This is a great way to learn to ID our invasive plant species and how to remove them. We recommend wearing long pants and sleeves, closed-toed shoes, gloves, a hat and mosquito spray. Bring gardening tools such as hand clippers, loppers, trowels, etc. if you have them. We are removing coral ardisia bushes and berries, nandina, tung trees, Tradescantia flumenensis, cat's claw vine, winged yam, Japanese climbing fern, skunkvine and more. Directions: The best way to get there is to take Meridian Rd to Waverly Rd, go to the next intersection and turn left onto Abbotsford Way, then turn left at the next road called Woodside Dr. At the stop sign turn left onto Lothian. Lothian ends in a cul-de-sac and there is a sign that says Brinkley Glen Park. 8:30am-11:30am
  
• Gamescape: Saturday Gaming. Gamescape has relocated from Railroad Square to the Huntington Oaks Plaza (Suite 302, next to the Library) at N Monroe St and Fred George Rd. Open gaming tables are available. Noon-6pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Old Time Jam. 4pm
  
• Duke’s and Dottie’s: Line Dancing Plus Lessons. 7pm/21+
  
• Bird’s Oyster Shack: Laughterday Night Fever. * Join us every Saturday at Bird's Aphrodisiac Oyster Shack for a free comedy show!* 8:30pm
  
• 926: Latin Night. Dance to the irresistible beats of Zeus and prepare to be dazzled by a spectacular drag show at midnight. It's more than a party, it's an experience. 9:30pm/$10 21+, $15 under 21
  

• Wakulla River – Upper Bridge: Kayaks & Koffee Expedition: Manatees & Mochas on the Wakulla. Embark on a scenic journey with our monthly Kayaks & Koffee event! Glide along the Wakulla River on a guided eco-tour, in search of majestic manatees. Savor the serenity with complimentary coffee in hand, creating a perfect fusion of nature, adventure, and the delightful warmth of a caffeine kick. Join us for a morning filled with paddling, wildlife, and the comforting aroma of freshly brewed memories. Leisurely float of just 3 miles. Bring your favorite coffee mug! Beginner & family-friendly. Here for more info: https://www.facebook.com/events/393980829837585 on this event. 9am
  
• Hudson Park, Crawfordville: 25th Annual Valentines Day Parade & Festival. Join the Rotary Club of Wakulla County as we celebrate love in the sweetest way! 10am
  
• Main Library: 2024 Spring Seed Library Kickoff. In partnership with UF/IFAS Leon County Extension, the event will feature fun for all ages, including hands-on seeding activities, insights on gardening techniques and sustainable practices, and an Ask-a-Master-Gardener booth. While you're there, choose from 10 fruit and vegetable varieties to jumpstart your spring gardening. Starting Saturday, February 10, visit any library branch location and check out up to five seed packets per month using your library card, or three packets per month without a library card, while supplies last. 10am
  
• St George Island Lighthouse Park: 3rd Annual SGI ShrimpFest. The St. George Lighthouse Association is thrilled to announce the upcoming 3rd Annual SGI ShrimpFest, a celebration of succulent shrimp dishes, vibrant music, unique shopping, and a festive atmosphere that promises a wonderful experience for all. This year’s festival will take place on Saturday, February 10th, from 11:00 am – 4:00 pm in the western parking area adjacent to Lighthouse Park. This one-day outdoor event will be a shrimp-lover's paradise, as we bring together local culinary talents sharing their mouthwatering shrimp delicacies. Our array of shrimp dishes promises to tantalize your taste buds. Adding to the festivities, there will be a curated group of arts and crafts vendors showcasing unique products, local nonprofit exhibitors, raffle items, a beer and wine station, hot cocoa and coffee, and a live musical performance by The Blues Factor Band that will keep the energy high and the good times rolling throughout the event. Do not be fooled by the name! Blues is not all the band plays. If you like the Blues Brothers Music, Classic Rock, The Rolling Stones, Motown, Funk, R&B and ALL the TOP HITS from the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's and today, you will love The Blues Factor Band! 11am/$5
  
• Common Ground Books: The Lovers Valentine’s Market. We’ll be featuring 20+ local businesses at this market, including: Tally Print Studio, who will be hosting a valentines card printing station, Le Point Pastry & Bakery, who will be serving up delicious pastries, Invisible Ink Tarot, who will be offering tarot readings. We will also be offering a 15% off discount on all of our blind date books and romance novels! 1pm
  
• Adams Street: Adams St. Flea. Join us for our first market of the year! Browse our market tent full of locally hand-made items, art, and vintage finds, all set to the vibes of our house DJ. Make an afternoon of your trip by visiting the restaurants and shops in the heart of our Capital City. The market will take place on Adams St. in between Hayward House and Poco Vino. Noon – 3pm
  
• Pedros: Live Electric Violinist Eddy Castellanos. 5:30pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Ben Banks & The Back-Ups. 6pm
  
• The Getaway Grill and Bar: Kristine Galloway. 6pm
  
• 926: Militarie Gun, Pool Kids, Spiritual Cramp, Death Lens, and Not Milk. 6:30pm
  
• Common Ground Books: The Watermelon Woman: Queer Film Fest. 6:30pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Grant Peeples with Rosalie Walsh and D. Scott Riggs. 7pm
  
• Oyster City: Southern Latitude Band. 7pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Valentine Vixens. 7pm
  
• The Bark: Televised, Durty Suns, and Phabrik. 8pm
  
• Theatre Tallahassee: Dueling Divas - The Men's Edition. Six of our powerhouse performers take the stage and treat you to an evening of music that will blow you away. This time we've stacked the stage with some of our most talented men: Kafui Ablordeppey (Avenue Q), Jake Armstrong (A Gentleman's Guide), John Campana (The Drowsy Chaperone), Ken Lambert (Young Frankenstein), Bryan Mitchell (Sister Act), and Joe Svisco (Mystery of Edwin Drood). Come watch these incredible stars duke it out vocally with some of their favorite Broadway hits. 8pm
  
• Fire Bettys: Soul Candy. 8pm/21+
  
• House of Music: Public Address. 8:30pm
  

SUNDAY, 2/11

• Bicycle House: Sunday Ride. Ride at 10:30 AM from Bicycle House. We will ride the Cascades trail to the St Marks trail and down to Wakulla station and return, about 31 miles. Ride speed is 12 to 14 mph, with periodic regroups. Vernon Bailey is the ride leader. Vernon is a new CCC member who’s been biking for 50 years enjoys riding with small groups and weekend touring. 10am
  
• Halisi Africa: Soulful Sundays. Join us for Motherland Brunch at Halisi Africa. We'll be serving our brunch special including an appetizer, main course, a sweet, and our signature African mimosas we call ukwaju. The event will also feature an art exhibition by Christopher Barnhart and live entertainment by local artists. 11am
  
• Flippin’ Great Pinball: $25 Sunday Funday. Every Sunday spend a fun-filled time with the family for only $25 plus tax at the arcade! Our normal all-day family admission of $34.99 is just $25 and that includes up to a family of 6 (two adults and four kids). Experience affordable family fun that everyone will enjoy. Noon-8pm
  
• E Peck Greene Park (Behind the LeRoy Collins Library): Food Not Bombs Free Mealshare. We offer free vegetarian/vegan food, water, coffee, personal care & hygiene products, bus passes, and clothing when we have some available to those in need. Contact foodnotbombstally@gmail.com to find out about getting involved. Noon-2pm
  
• LeRoy Collins Library: Tallahassee Go Club Meetings. Come play the captivating ancient game of Go, also known as Baduk, with some friendly games and discussions. Beginners welcome. Visit https://www.tallahasseegoclub.com for more information. 1pm
  
• Gamescape: Pokémon League. Come learn, play, and trade with the Pokémon Trading Card Game and the Pokémon video games! We LOVE seeing new players, so come learn how to play! We play both the Trading Card Game and the Video Game casually and competitively. The store offers lots of different seating arrangements to meet our group's needs, as well as food, drinks, and Pokémon products for purchase. We are also hold regular, officially sanctioned tournaments for Pokémon Trading Card Game and Video Game Competitions! 2-4pm
  
• The Plant: Open Jam. All instruments, all players welcome. 5pm-9pm
  
• Pedro’s: Mariachi Clasico. 6pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Open Mic Night Hosted by Conor Churchill. 7pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing: Comedy Night. Come have some laughs with us on Sunday nights! If you are interested in participating in the show, reach out to therealsleepypfloyd@gmail.com 7:30pm
  

• Community Thrift: February Pop Up. We will have 20+ vendors selling handmade, vintage and food items. We have 4 bakers coming friends - FOUR! Community Thrift will have a booth with our famous gift baskets! The perfect beautiful gift for your sweetie (guy or gal), your kids, your mom, your grandma and even your Galentine! This market we are collecting diapers for Women Empowering Each Other - WEE. Preferable size 1, 4 or 6. Bring a pack of diapers and receive a token worth $5 at any vendor - or in the store. 11am
  
• Ruby Diamond: PRISM. Packed with performances ranging from small ensembles to the world-renowned Marching Chiefs, PRISM is a yearly favorite. The program showcases the immense talent boasted by Florida State University’s College of Music students and faculty. Known for blending traditional fare with more recognizable popular tunes, PRISM is a gem for music lovers of all kinds. This remarkable and lively performance migrates around the venue with each changing ensemble, creating a one-of-a-kind experience based on your location. Come enjoy the energy and passion of Florida State’s music program first-hand in this unforgettable performance! 2pm
  
• The Bark: 3rd Annual Broken Heart Fund benefit show for the American Heart Association featuring music from Civil Strife, Thief, Frogs Dogs, Killer Choice, June The Phrog, and Clyde Densmore. 7pm
  

MONDAY, 2/12

• Just One More: Bingo. 5pm-6:30pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Margarita Monday, Open-Mic Night hosted by The Saltwater Cowboy. 5:30pm-8pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Cha Cha - Weekly Lessons. 6:15pm/$5
  
• Hangar 38: Bingo. 6:45pm
  
• Vino Beano: Tipsy Trivia. 7pm
  

TUESDAY, 2/13

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour. 5pm
  
• The Getaway Grille: Tuesday Night Bikes and Trikes. 6pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Company: Tuesday Night Beer-go! 6pm
  
• Crafty Crab: BOOMIN' Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Gamescape: Hobby Night. Slay the grey together! Join your fellow gamers and turn your pile of grey miniatures into a battle ready army. Need some painting tips? Feel free to ask at hobby night. You can bring any miniature for any game to paint. 7pm
  
• Ology Midtown: Jazz Jam Sessions. 7pm
  
• Island Wings: Trivia. 7pm
  
• House of Music: Tuesday Trivia & Karaoke. 7pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Tallahassee Swing Band Tuesday Night Dance. 7:30pm
  
• Burrito Boarder: Karaoke with DJ Roldus. 8pm
  
• Poor Pauls: Trivia. 8pm/21+
  
• Blue Tavern: Bluesday Tuesday with Bill Ricci. Every Tuesday is Blues Day @ the Blue Tavern and Blues Meets Girl is a Tallahassee favorite. This perfect, intimate venue provides just what you need for both a mid-week break and authentic blues music experience. 8pm/$5
  
• 4th Quarter: Professor Jim's Tuesday Night Trivia. Popular for a reason! 8pm
  
• Argonaut Coffee: Trivia Tuesday. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Karaoke. 8pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Open Mic Comedy Night. 8pm/21+
  
• 926: Tacos and Trivia. 9pm
  

• Blue Tavern: Carnival! We put the Fat in Fat Tuesday. We'll bring the King Cake, drink specials, and wall to wall party music, and you bring your Carnival spirit for Mardi Gras at the tavern! Free admission – donations encouraged for the musicians. Music from various carnival traditions by Joe Goldberg & The Function, Chris Seepersaud, & Hot Tamale. AT 6 PM: We'll form up for a 6:30 parade around the neighborhood from the tavern south to 4th, west to Duval, north to 6th, and back to the tavern. There will be lots of costumery, hand percussion, horns, kazoos, whatever you bring or borrow! Come join in. We’ll have beads & throws for participants. 5pm/free

WEDNESDAY, 2/14

• Sugar and Spice Tally: Game Night. Join us every Wednesday Night for community game night. Bring your own or use ours! Let me know if you need to reserve space for a large group. Free to attend! 5pm
  
• Tara Angel’s Magic: D&D Experience - Adult (18+) Group. Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition - Candlekeep Mysteries. A one-shot is a D&D event that starts and finishes in the same session, typically lasting 3 - 4 hours. We have pre-generated characters for players to choose from. WHAT TO BRING: Pencils, Dice (can be purchased in store), Mask (encouraged for unvaccinated participants), Enthusiasm! Please sign up in advance to reserve a spot in this campaign. Tickets can be purchased in-store, over the phone, or on the website. For more information, please email sales@taraangelsmagic.com, or call: (850) 878-4555 6pm-9pm
  
• Goodwood: Wonderful Wednesday. 6pm/$5
  
• Level 8 Rooftop Lounge: Trivia. 6pm
  
• The Great Games Library: Open Game Night. 6pm/free
  
• American Legion Hall: Sue Boyd Country Western and More Dance Class. Session 2 - Beginner 6:30 to 7:45 pm What: East Coast Swing and Waltz. Cost: $8.00 per person. Wear comfortable shoes you can turn in. 7:45 to 8:15 - Practice dance with paid admission. 8:15 to 9:30: Intermediate - 2 Step and WCS. $8.00 per person or $13.00 for both classes. Vaccines are required. Face masks are optional. Changing partners is optional. 6:30pm
  
• Perry Lynn’s Smokehouse in Quincy: Wed Night Open Mic w/ Steven Ritter and Friends. 6:30pm
  
• Hangar 38: Trivia. 6:45pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Tallahassee: Trivia. Teams up to 6 players for three rounds with 10 questions and a tie breaker each round. Winners are by round so don’t worry if you need to come late or can’t stay the whole time! Prizes include a round of beer, a 6 pack and a gift card! 7pm
  
• Proof: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Vino Beano: Wine Bingo. 7pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Wednesday Open Mic with Doc Russell. The open mic night that has run continuously for almost 20 years, once housed at the Warehouse, lives on at the Blue Tavern. Doc Russell continues as the host with the most. Sign up starts at 7:45pm/free to attend
  
• House of Music: Bar Bingo! Free to Play & Late Night Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Karaoke! 8pm/21+/free
  
• Dukes and Dotties: College Night and Line Dancing Lessons. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Open Mic Night. 8pm
  
• South Station: Summer Movie Nights. 8:30pm/free
  
• The Bark: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 9pm
  
• Peppers: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• 926: Dragged Out Wednesday. 10pm
  

• Common Ground Books: Queer Paint-A-Pot Workshop. This Valentine's Day, we'll be joined by Laurel Blackthorne, the artist behind Blackthorne Ceramics, for a Queer Paint-A-Pot Workshop! All participants in this workshop will be able to paint a snack plate as well as a heart shaped bowl, both hand-thrown by Laurel. Participants are also welcome to bring their own beer, wine, or non-alcoholic beverage to sip while painting. We will not be selling any alcohol on site. 6pm
  
• Lotus Flower Candles & Wellness (RR Sq): Valentines Creative Date Night. Join us this Valentines with your significant other to celebrate love with this special creative date night. Couple Photo Shoot. Custom Candle Workshop. Catered Dinner & Fondu Desert. Couple bond building Games. Sip Paint Zen. Live Music. & a Relaxing Zenful Atmosphere. This event is sure to delight your special someone! Come create something that lasts Forever! Event cost includes everything mentioned above (you must bring your own wine if desired) 6pm/$125
  
• Amicus Brewing: Speed Friending. Join us on Valentine’s Day, Wednesday February 14th for an epic round of Speed Friending! We’ll do a lightning round robin format with discussion prompts led by a mic’d MC. The night will come with some epic perks including bubbly, beer, decorations, and tasty charcuterie snacks. Oh, did we mention we’ll be debuting two new beers specifically targeted to this event?!? A rose hip infused lager as well as a chocolate-covered strawberry stout. So how exactly does this work you ask? Here we go… 1. Purchase a $20 ticket on our website @ amicus.beer (https://www.amicusbrewingventures.com/hosted). Numbers are limited and registration closes on the evening of Tuesday 2/13. Ticket provides entry to the event plus all the outlined perks. 2. During online registration you will provide some key identifiers including your age and pronoun identification/preferences to Amicus staff. 3. On entrance day of, you will receive an event card outlining your anonymous pairings per round and seating locations for the evening. Pairing groups will be divided according to ages. 4. Each round will consist of a few minutes to discuss prompted questions with your pairing. We will not discuss any personally identifiable details other than first name. There will be breaks scheduled to allow for drinks and food. 5. At the end of the round (during transition to your next location) you will simply mark a ‘Y’ or a ’N’ for the just completed round. 6. After the event is over, Amicus will coordinate all of the event cards and any mutual ‘Y’ selections will have their full name and email addresses distributed electronically by Amicus. From there, we hope friendship (or maybe more) blossoms! 7pm
  
• Ruby Diamond: Complexions Contemporary Ballet. Led by dance icons Dwight Rhoden and Desmond Richardson, Complexions Contemporary Ballet has awakened audiences to a new, exciting genre with their singular approach of reinventing dance and contemporary ballet. With stunning gifted dancers and powerful choreography, Complexions has been hailed as “game changing” by London’s The Guardian and a “matchless American dance company” by the Philadelphia Inquirer. A collection of company favorites open the program that also features LOVE ROCKS, set to the music of Lenny Kravitz, it is Rock meets Ballet! Fun, thrilling and the most amazing Kravitz music, LOVE ROCKS is the “ ! ” on this exciting program. 7:30pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Valentine’s Day Comedy hosted by Sleepy P Floyd. 8pm
  

4 Pillars (2023) Edition by William Bernstein

• Albert Einstien "Compound interest is the 8th wonder of the world. He who understands it, earns it. He who doesn't, pays it."
• Investing is half Shakespeare and half math
  • There is the essential dry mathematical part of finance, but also the human half.

Pillar 1: Investment Theory

• Risk and returns go hand in hand
  • Do not expect high returns without occasional bone crushing losses
  • There is no market timing fairy to bail you out
  • John Maynard Keynes "I should say that it is from time to time the duty of the serious investor to accept the depreciation of his holdings with equanimity and without reproaching himself."

Pillar 2: Investment History

• Finance is not a hard science like physics. Rather it is a social science
  • The successful investor needs to understand 2 concepts
  • The long-term returns and short-term volatilities of various asset classes
  • How Mr. Market suffers from severe bipolar disorder

Pillar 3: Investment Psychology

• The investors greatest danger is themselves

Piller 4: The Business of Investment

• Stay away from the financial services industry

Using the 4 Pillars

• If you can't save, it doesn't matter how well you invest.
• If you think money's purpose is to buy stuff, you are doomed to fail
• The best money in the world is "Fuck You Money" This can be used to buy time and autonomy
• Your ability to stay the course is directly proportional to the amount of short-term safe assets in your portfolio
• By far the biggest determinant of your investment success is how well you respond to the worst 2% of times, when everything and everyone around you is melting
  • You will experience such moments a few times in your life
• When you "Won the game" stop playing.
• The essence of investing is not maximizing returns, but rather maximizing the odds of success.

Pillar 1 The Theory of Investing

• Return and risk are joined at the hip; high returns can only be obtained by taking large risks and sustaining occasional big loses, and safety comes with low returns
• There are only two forms of participation in the financial economy: loaning money at interest (debt) or sharing ownership (equity). A company's shareholders, get paid last and are in a far more tenuous position then debt holders. They frequently suffer share price declines and therefore demand a higher expected return to compensate for that risk
• Arithmetic and Geometric Returns
  • Imagine you have a stock that doubles (100% return) the first year, then loses 50% the next year. $10 starting price
  • After year 1 = $20
  • After year 2 = $10
    • The arithmetic return is 25%
    • The geometric return is 0%
  • A young person saving for retirement wants poor portfolio returns up front followed by high returns later on
  • The retired person wants high returns up front and bad ones later
• Stocks offer a higher expected return than safe assets because of their risks. This is called the equity risk premium (ERP)
• Since most companies disappear, nearly all they leave their investors with is the dividends they (or the companies that take them over or merge) pay out before they die. This is the only proper way to value a stock.
• The real value of your assets is not the number on your brokerage statement, but the stream of income it provides.
• The best way to estimate the future returns on stocks is to use the Gordon Equation
  • Expected Return (Fundamental Return) = Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth
• Real example of Gordon Equation
  • 1926-2021 US Stock Market Return (Nominal) – Dividend Yield 5% and Dividend Growth Rate of 1.6% with 0.7% inflation
  • Estimated Nominal Return = 5% + 1.6% = 6.6%
  • Estimated Real Return = 6.6% - 0.7% Inflation = 5.9%
  • Actual Real Return = 7.35%. 7.35%-5.9% = 1.45% higher than estimated by the Gordon Equation
    • Why the difference? Stocks got more expensive. The dividend fell from 5% in 1926 to 1.26% in 2021. In 1926, it only took $20 of stock to get $1 in dividends, by 2021, you had to purchase $80 in stock to get the same $1. The "dividend multiple" quadrupled over the time frame (5/1.25 = 4). Over 96 years that annualizes out to 1.45% - exactly the gap.
  • Realized Return = Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth + Annualized Change in Dividend Multiple
  • The expected return is AKA the "Fundamental Return" of the market. This is what you would get if the dividend multiple doesn't change.
    • The preceding equation could be
    • Realized (Actual) Return = Expected (Fundamental) Return + Annualized Change in dividend multiple
  • The expected (fundamental) return is easily calculated number and more stable.
  • On the other hand, the annualized change in multiple fluctuates, sometimes wildly, and is completely unforecastable and thus unknown
  • We call this portion of the equation the "Speculative Return"
  • So, the Gordon equation can be summarized as
  • Actual Return = Fundamental Return (Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth Rate) + Speculative Return (Change in Multiples)
  • On any given year, the speculative return (change in multiple) overwhelms the fundamental return. Even over 10-year periods, real annualized returns can deviate widely from the Gordon equation estimate. Only over very long time periods, on the order of a generation, does the Gordon equation provide a reasonably accurate estimate of future returns.
  • In 2008, the dividend multiple fell by 42% and the speculative return also
  • In 1933, the dividend multiple rose by 66%.
    • In both years, the fundamental return only changed by a few percent.
• Current (2022) Estimate based on Gordon Equation
  • 1.7% Dividend Yield + 2.0% Real Dividend Growth = 3.7% (If the dividend multiple doesn't change
  • Some have suggested that stock buybacks have added a "buyback yield" This is a dubious proposition; buybacks reduce both dividend payouts and critical reinvestment in business. Most buybacks generally provide for executive option compensation, are a form of executive salary, and do not result in increased shareholder ownership of the firm. Moreover, most buybacks occur when corporations are flush with cash at high equity prices and are poorly timed.
• Around the world, stocks have performed the way they are supposed to, offering returns that are uniformly higher than those offered by bonds and bills
• English Common Law (common law institutions that protect property rights) produces high returns. The secure ownership of both stocks and bonds depends these institutions.
  • For this reason, while he thinks emerging markets (less than stellar legal systems) have a place in a well-diversified portfolio, He is not overly optimistic about them.
• Do stocks get less risky over time? No
  • In a paper by Zvi Bodie (1995) he showed over increasing time horizons, put options became more expensive
• Young, periodic savers should get down on their hands and knees and pray for a severe bear market at the beginning of their investment journey, so as to acquire shares on the cheap (assuming they can find a job that pays them well enough during those bad times)
• For the retiree who receives a bad initial return draw, stocks are risky indeed. This is known as "Sequence of Return Risks"
• For the Young saver, as long as he keeps his cool during the discouragement that attends the inevitable bear markets that all long-term investors will encounter, stock market risk is a snooze
• Estimating the returns of bonds is easy. You buy a 4% bond. You get 4%. But remember that is nominal return. Not real return
  • TIPS are another option. Principal and interest keep pace with CPI. But they have had a negative yield (-1.9%) as recently as 2021.
  • Break Even Yield (Estimated Inflation Rate) – Difference between the rates of ordinary bonds and TIPS of similar maturities.
    • As of right now (2022) the market thinks (based on the Break Even Yield of the (30-year bonds) the inflation rate will be 2.3% over 30 years.
  • Corporate bonds throw off a little higher return, but at higher risks. Companies can and do go bankrupt. Bondholders can recover some of their holdings in bankruptcy, on average, about half.
    • The most important metric in corporate bonds is the "loss rate" or the total net return lost each year to bankruptcy after recovery in court. The loss rate for Baa bonds (lowest investment grade) is around 0.2% per year.
    • The problem is that on their way to default, a bond will get sequentially downgraded
  • The longest series of corporate bond returns show that, averaged over all grades, they yield about 1.6% more than treasuries of the same maturity, about half which is lost to bankruptcy. Thus, offering about 0.8% extra return over treasures.
  • Is this 0.8% return worth the risk? No. The loss rate is normally low, but high during times of economic turbulence.
    • Bad returns in bad times AKA "Ilmanen Risk" after Antti Ilmanen
    • In other words, corporate bonds experience losses at the worst possible times. Corporate bonds are hit hardest when you are most likely to need cash to purchase stocks when they are cheap
  • In contrast to corporate bonds, a small corner of the fixed income market deals with "catastrophe bonds", whose principal is wiped out by a "trigger event" typically a hurricane or earthquake. Since hurricanes are earthquakes are uncorrelated to financial crises, they offer lower expected returns than similarly rated corporate bonds.
  • Risk is not just about how much you lose, but also, when you lose it
  • This is true of other assets as well, the classic being Gold
    • Gold often does well when stocks and bonds tank; thus, its expected return should be low, which is well reflected in its realized return. Over 2 millennia, close to 0 real return.
    • Silver has about the same long term real return (0)
  • High quality corporate bonds can be thought of as 90/10 mix of treasury bonds and equities.
  • Junk bonds something close to 50/50 treasury and equities
    • To mitigate the biggest risk to your portfolio (mental health and investment discipline) during the worst of times, it is best to keep your stocks and bonds in entirely separate mental accounts and to own only the safest fixed income assets
  • Commodities (except for Gold/Silver) are limited to futures contracts (unless you can store it) which is a zero-sum game
  • Increasing popularity of commodities futures investing has pushed up the prices of contracts resulting in a phenomenon called contango.
    • During contango the futures price is higher than the spot (current) price. And you can't access that spot price unless you have the ability to store it. You buy high and sell low when the market is in contango.
  • Real estate holds its real value and yields rental income, but owning property is more a job than an investment. And you are undiversified
  • REIT's can fix the diversification problem, but now you just own equity shares
  • Private real estate funds and syndications lie midway between individually owned property and REITs but are highly illiquid and insufficiently diversified.
    • People also forget the 2007-2009 crash and how rents fell and tenants let lease lapse
  • Cryptocurrency
  • If you believe its enthusiasts, its money freed from the specter of the governments prying eyes and printing press. You can earn interest on it, as long as you are willing to take in more crypto and don't mind the risk that the founder of the "bank" is a fraudster.
    • Crypto may well revolutionize finance, so did the appearance of stamped metal coins millennia ago, but over the centuries since these marvelous inventions, holding them in your safe or purse hasn't proved a paying proposition.
  • In the worst of times, the prices of both debt and equity can fall dramatically. To compensate their owners for the high perceived risk at such times, their expected returns must rise dramatically. Most of the time, purchases at such times do well. Unless they don't
  • The past 4 decades has been one long beer and pizza party. 2022 saw some dieting. Both financial history and simple prudence suggest the possibility of more of the same
  • Investing demands diligence and hard work, and occasionally you will suffer substantial loss. The odds are in your favor if you can stay the course through the worst of times. Maximize your odds of doing so with a nice pile of "sleeping money" (Short duration Treasuries and FDIC guaranteed CD's
• "Bad" (Value) companies have higher returns than "Good" (Growth) companies over very long timeframes
  • Because they are riskier.
  • Their cash flows tend to be less steady and they are more heavily indebted.
  • They usually do poorly during economic crises.
• Investors overestimate the growth potential of glamorous companies
  • When growth stocks exceed expectations, it does just OK, but when it fails them, look out below.
  • When value stocks excel expectations, it does very well and even when it disappoints, it isn't hurt too badly.
• Fama and French discovered the 3-factor model for returns in 1992
  • Market – stock return in excess of T-Bills
  • Small – small company stock return minus large
  • Value – value company stock return minus growth
  • Returns and SD (1926-2021)
  • Market – 6.82% and 18.47%
  • Small – 1.80% and 10.99%
  • Value – 3.37% and 12.23%
    • These factors are long/short so if you are long only, you would only get half the extra return
    • Small factor has disappeared since it was discovered in 1981.
    • The Value factor has been trending down. Why?
    • More investors are aware of the value factor and products selling them are more widely available. "Crowded Trade"
      • If we believe this, then value stocks should be more expensive relative to growth stocks. They are not.
    • Another idea is that investors have been dazzled by the growth prospects and power of the big tech firms. They are dumping their value stocks to chase the large growth stocks.
      • If we believe this to be the reason, then value stocks should be less expensive relative to growth stocks. They currently are (2022)
      • Most of the time, growth stocks are 4x more expensive than value stocks by price/book ratio.
      • In 2020, growth stocks were 11.1x more expensive. In 2022, 7.4x
      • The last time the ratios were this high was the before the dot.com bubble of the late 1990's and the great depression
    • The current data shows similar return patterns abroad.
    • Large market factor, nonexistent small factor and a middling value factor.
    • The value factor is trending down in foreign markets too and the small factor is gone just like the U.S.
    • The have discovered new factors over the last few decades
    • Momentum – high returns over the past year predicted slightly higher returns next year
      • Factor premium was 7%
      • This factor puzzled efficient market theory proponents. How could momentum have higher returns. Well, we had a momentum crash in 2009. The risk factor was hidden for so long until it showed up
    • Is it possible the high equity premium hides the small probability of a rare by large loss like momentum? Probably not. It is not secret that real equity returns can be negative for a long time
    • In the U.S., the real return was zero from 1966-1983 (17 years)
    • Italy and Austria had real equity returns of 1% over 122 years
  • How much should you expose yourself to factors? Not everyone can do it. There is nothing wrong with not tilting and owning only total market funds.
    • If you are going to tilt, he recommends value
• Shallow Risk – A loss of real capital that recovers quickly
• Deep Risk – The permanent loss of real capital
  • To deal with shallow risk, maintain deep liquidity in the form of treasuries and CD's. This allows you to weather turbulent markets, purchase stocks at low prices and keep your courage up
• 4 Horsemen of Deep Risk
  • Inflation
  • Confiscation
  • Devastation
  • Deflation
• Deflation is rare in the modern era of fiat money
• Not much financially to do about Devastation
• Confiscation can only be avoided by moving both yourself and your assets
  • Most Americans loath to renounce their citizenship
  • An option is to maintain citizenship but move assets abroad. But if you own stocks or bonds at foreign brokerages, you will encounter a barrage of IRS red tape and legal risks. The safest assets to own would be ones that produce no income. Like Gold bars in a vault or foreign real estate you don't rent out.
• Inflation is the most likely risk and one of the simplest to mitigate
  • Keep your nominal fixed income securities short. Less than 5 years
  • Inflation hurts long bonds much worse than short bonds
    • Inflation increases the stock/bond correlation
    • We saw both of these in 2022
  • Long term government bonds do provide the best protection from deflation, but inflation destroys them, which is far more likely
  • TIPS and I-Bonds in small amounts can be useful
  • Although true that stocks prices fall as inflation rises, equities still represent real claims on assets and over the very long run, seem to hold their real value
  • During the Weimar Hyperinflation Inflation of 1920-1923, equites still provided a positive real return (although a wild ride)
  • The stocks of commodities producers themselves (Gold Stocks, Oil Stocks, Base Metal Producers) can do rather well during inflation
  • He doesn't recommend the commodity futures because of crowding/contango problems mentioned above
  • Value stocks also tend to do well during inflation
  • They are usually more indebted and benefit as inflation erodes away the size of their debt
  • Their cash flows occur sooner than growth companies, so the present value of value stocks cash flows get discounted less than that of growth stocks.
• The mathematical expectation of the speculator is Zero
• 1933 article titled "Can stock market forecasters forecast?" found their (16 financial service companies, 20 fire insurance companies, and 24 newsletters) recommendations were on average, atrocious. Readers would have been better off throwing darts at the stock page
• Fama's first job in the 1950's was looking for data to use for profitable trading rules for Economics professor Harry Ernst. He uncovered platoons of them. The problem?
  • Fama's discoveries succeeded ex post but they failed ex ante.
  • Ex post is easy, ex ante is hard.
• Buffett – "Beware of past performance proofs in finance. If history books were the key to riches, the Forbes 400 list would consist of librarians."
  • Consider a stadium with 10,000 people. Flip a coin 10 times. By the end, 10 flippers will remain. It is the same for picking stocks and money managers. That doesn't mean they can turn the trick the next time.
  • Farma arrived at the same conclusion. In the long run, almost no one can time the market or pick winning stocks.
  • Farma is famous for his EMH – Efficient Market Hypothesis
  • Strong – That all information, public and private, has already been impounded into prices
  • Semi – Strong – only public, but not private, information has been impounded into prices.
  • Weak – past price action does not predict future price moves.
  • EMH consigned to the dust bin the field of "technical analysis"
  • Michael Jensen used Williams Sharpe mathematics to measure the performance of funds and discovered 3 things
  • The average fund produces a gross return approximately equal to the markets return
  • The average investor receives that market return minus expenses
  • Chance seems to "best" explain managers performance
  • It has to be this way, professional money managers are the market, so by definition, must obtain the market return before expenses.
  • The reason it is difficult for individuals to beat the market is you are competing against the collective wisdom of the market
  • Bernard Baruch – "Something everyone knows isn't worth knowing."
  • So, by the time information reaches the financial media, it can be ignored.
    • Jonathan Clements of WSJ – "I own last year's best performing fund. The problem is I bought it this year."
  • The worthlessness of newsletters, and of market strategies in general, makes perfect sense. If you could successfully time the market, you'd keep the profits for yourself.
  • Whenever you buy or sell a stock, ask yourself, who am I trading against?
  • Professional money manger
  • Warren Buffett
  • The CFO of the company
    • It's like playing tennis against an invisible opponent. And that opponent is Serena Williams.
  • Stock returns are positively skewed, which means that a very small number of companies produce the lions share of market returns.
    • Since 1926 – Only 4% of companies provided the entire equity risk premium. 96% are matching T-Bills
  • Many successful fund mangers suffer from "asset bloat" after success. This actually makes future success more difficult
    • Superstar mangers sow the seeds of their own destruction simply by growing their portfolios too large.
  • Simons Law (Medallion Fund) – the most talented investors quickly privatize their talents by shutting their portfolios to all but family and employees. If someone is skilled enough to regularly trounce the market, they don't want to manage your money.
• The most common statistical definition of risk is volatility, as measured by standard deviation (SD). But SD misses an important dimension of risk: volatility timing.
  • For Example – a portfolio of corporate bonds and another of treasury bonds will have the same volatility. But the corporate likely bite you hard during a financial crisis.
  • Few sensations are as disturbing as the realization that what you thought was money isn't.
• Charlie Munger – the prime directive of compounding is to never interrupt it.
  • A great deal of your success depends upon how you behave during the worst of times.
• Correlation – ranges from +1 to -1
  • +1 = 2 assets always move in the same direction
  • -1 = 2 assets always move in opposite directions
• Foreign stocks or bonds subject investors to not only the risks of those securities, but also the additional risk of currency fluctuation.
  • For example – a stock denominated in UK pound will rise or fall in value along with the value of that currency against the dollar
• In the long run, currency effects have a tendency to mean revert.
  • Investors should hold foreign stocks in unhedged vehicles, which is how most are done.
  • But unlike stocks, they should hedge their foreign bond exposure
  • Currency volatility greatly exceeds bond price volatility
  • A hedged foreign bond behaves similarly to a US bond
  • They incur additional hedging expenses
  • They don't carry a US government guarantee
    • He doesn't think foreign bonds are worth owning for these reasons
  • When inflation occurs, stock/bond correlations tend to be more positive (1970-80's and 2022)
• PME (Precious Metals Equity) is an asset class with persistently low correlations to stocks and bonds
  • 0.23 between 1963 and 2021
  • "Gold Bugs" prize the shelter that the metal and its miners provide during financial crises.
  • The insurance against geopolitical instability provided by gold and PME bids up their prices and lowers their future returns. As expected, the protection doesn't come for free.
• VIX (Volatility Futures) has a correlation of -0.79 with the stock market. But they exhibit severe contango where the futures price is higher than the spot (current) price
  • So, volatility options can save you against market drops, but at the cost that more than wipes out the equity risk premium. People don't sell insurance for free.
• Correlations are increasing between US and foreign stocks
  • Bruno Solnik – "Diversification fails us just when we need it the most."
  • In the short term and during crashes, it is true.
  • Spreading your stock bets around may be worthless during market meltdowns, but it proves its merit in the recovery from them
  • Wise investors care little about a horrendous year or two, as long as they can hang on.
  • Even an experienced investor can be ruined by a bad decade or two, and over very long horizons is where diversification shines
    • Imagine a person in Japan with a 100% Japanese portfolio who retired in 1990 and received a 0.53% nominal return over the next 32 years. They ran out of money within a decade.
• While low correlations among asset classes are your friends, they are hard to find. Low correlation stock and option assets are highly prized and thus see their prices bid up and have consequently low expected and realized returns
• With increasing globalized financial markets, short term correlations among stock assets have risen. The good news is that over very long periods, global diversification should still prove valuable
• There is no Asset Allocation Fairy
  • Neither a guru nor a quantitative technique that will find you an asset allocation that delivers the highest future returns or a given amount of risk
  • Don't use Mean Variance Optimized algorithms to develop your portfolio
  • Outputs are highly sensitive to their inputs, particularly asset returns
  • Optimizers are likely to overexpose the portfolio to assets that have high recent returns (but consequently have low expected future returns)
  • Some people refer to MVO as a "Error Maximizer"
  • The developer of the MVO was Dr. Markowitz
    • His portfolio was 50/50 stock bond so as to minimize his future regret. Either stocks were up and he didn't have more, or stocks were down and he was in them
  • The first step and most important step in building a portfolio is deciding your stock and bond asset allocation percentage
  • The most import part of investing is to determine how much risk is required to meet your goals and how much risk you can tolerate at each stage of your investing career.
  • Once you have figured out how much risk you are going to take during each stage of your life, how to allocate your assets among classes of stocks and bonds becomes a more tractable task.
• Because their human capital dwarfs their investment capital, young people in theory cannot invest aggressively enough. But many do not have the stomach for that kind of volatility
• The retiree by contrast has had time to become familiar with their ability to handle investment risks, but their burn rate may be high enough to fall afoul of sequence of return risk. On the other hand, if their burn rate is low enough, their actual stock/bond mix may not matter that much at all.
• Merton and Samuelson wrote a pair of papers that concluded that if investors risk tolerances remained consistent thorough their lives, then so too should their asset allocations remain the same
  • For example – Frida is a young person with a very secure job paying $50,000. This makes her human capital worth about $1,000,000. 20 years x $50,000
  • Her stock portfolio is $10,000 with 100% equity.
  • Her human capital is almost all bond like.
  • Her overall equity allocation is less than 1%. It makes no theoretical sense for her to own any bonds. Because her bond like human capital dwarfs her investment stock like capital.
    • If we take this example even further, she should actually leverage her portfolio for an equity exposure over 100%.
  • Equities are less risky for the periodic savers than for older investors.
    • Anyone under the age of 45 or so should wish for a crushing bear market so that she can acquire more stock shares at bargain prices.
    • But stocks don't fall that much without a highly compelling narrative, usually involving a financial system panic or geopolitical catastrophe, usually about once per decade
      • The reasons we are averse to financial risk are evolutionary. It was better not to take too many chances
    • Young investors though who haven't encountered serious equity losses are vulnerable to market declines and the hoopla that surrounds them
    • The primary goal of retirement savings is to cover basic living expenses over the rest of the investor's lifetime. 20-25 years is a good goal.
    • The Trinity Study (4% Burn Rate). The problem with the study was that used historical returns which are likely much higher than those currently on offer. 7% for stocks and 2% for bonds
    • So, the 4-5% burn rates of the Trinity and Bengen studies are likely to be too high going forward
    • If you estimated burn rate is much about 3.5%, you are in the danger zone going forward
      • If you can tolerate a burn rate in the 2-3.5% range, you are in good shape
    • The best thing you can do is burn down your money and hold off on Social Security till age 70. Which is the best annuity you can buy.
    • An immediate fixed annuity can also be an option. But you are taking on credit risk with this so he recommends spreading your purchases among 2 or 3 different companies to mitigate that risk
• You can't know in advance which asset allocation will be best
• Your asset allocation should be reasonable. It should center mainly on broad domestic and foreign markets and not overly emphasize small, value, REITs, Oil or precious metals equity
• More important than portfolio complexity and precise asset allocation is your ability to stay the course through thick and thin.
  • A suboptimal allocation you can execute is better than an optimal one you can't
• A foreign stock allocation between 30-50% seems reasonable.
• A small value tilt can make sense for the risk tolerant investor
• REITS, Precious Metals Equity, and Oil stocks can also make sense
• Keep your treasuries short duration (<5 years)
• A perfectly reasonable asset allocation can run the range from a basic Target Date Fund (TDF) to more than a dozen different funds with various factor and asset class tilts
• REITS provide their income in the form of dividends. Therefore, you should only hold them in tax advanced accounts
  • The tend to perform well in the aftermath of tech bubble collapses
• Precious Metals Equity and Energy stocks are only recommended for those who can tolerate complexity and want protection from inflation
• Precious Metals Equity has suffered share price loss of 70% 3 times in the last 6 decades, but it is precisely this volatility that recommends it to those with cast iron stomachs
  • The large purchase mandated by portfolio rebalancing during severe downdrafts eventually sow the seeds for large gains during the bounce backs, which saw a 3x of this asset class from the 3 market bottoms
  • This asset class requires nerves of steel and is appropriate only for the most enthusiastic of asset class junkies and should only constitute a few percent of a portfolio
  • Gold itself requires a much higher asset allocation than the PME to provide the same degree of diversification.

Part 2 - https://www.reddit.com/Bogleheads/comments/1ad8qtv/4_pillars_of_investing_2023_edition_by_william/

4 Pillars (2023) Edition by William Bernstein

• Albert Einstien "Compound interest is the 8th wonder of the world. He who understands it, earns it. He who doesn't, pays it."
• Investing is half Shakespeare and half math
  • There is the essential dry mathematical part of finance, but also the human half.

Pillar 1: Investment Theory

• Risk and returns go hand in hand
  • Do not expect high returns without occasional bone crushing losses
  • There is no market timing fairy to bail you out
  • John Maynard Keynes "I should say that it is from time to time the duty of the serious investor to accept the depreciation of his holdings with equanimity and without reproaching himself."

Pillar 2: Investment History

• Finance is not a hard science like physics. Rather it is a social science
  • The successful investor needs to understand 2 concepts
  • The long-term returns and short-term volatilities of various asset classes
  • How Mr. Market suffers from severe bipolar disorder

Pillar 3: Investment Psychology

• The investors greatest danger is themselves

Piller 4: The Business of Investment

• Stay away from the financial services industry

Using the 4 Pillars

• If you can't save, it doesn't matter how well you invest.
• If you think money's purpose is to buy stuff, you are doomed to fail
• The best money in the world is "Fuck You Money" This can be used to buy time and autonomy
• Your ability to stay the course is directly proportional to the amount of short-term safe assets in your portfolio
• By far the biggest determinant of your investment success is how well you respond to the worst 2% of times, when everything and everyone around you is melting
  • You will experience such moments a few times in your life
• When you "Won the game" stop playing.
• The essence of investing is not maximizing returns, but rather maximizing the odds of success.

Pillar 1 The Theory of Investing

• Return and risk are joined at the hip; high returns can only be obtained by taking large risks and sustaining occasional big loses, and safety comes with low returns
• There are only two forms of participation in the financial economy: loaning money at interest (debt) or sharing ownership (equity). A company's shareholders, get paid last and are in a far more tenuous position then debt holders. They frequently suffer share price declines and therefore demand a higher expected return to compensate for that risk
• Arithmetic and Geometric Returns
  • Imagine you have a stock that doubles (100% return) the first year, then loses 50% the next year. $10 starting price
  • After year 1 = $20
  • After year 2 = $10
    • The arithmetic return is 25%
    • The geometric return is 0%
  • A young person saving for retirement wants poor portfolio returns up front followed by high returns later on
  • The retired person wants high returns up front and bad ones later
• Stocks offer a higher expected return than safe assets because of their risks. This is called the equity risk premium (ERP)
• Since most companies disappear, nearly all they leave their investors with is the dividends they (or the companies that take them over or merge) pay out before they die. This is the only proper way to value a stock.
• The real value of your assets is not the number on your brokerage statement, but the stream of income it provides.
• The best way to estimate the future returns on stocks is to use the Gordon Equation
  • Expected Return (Fundamental Return) = Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth
• Real example of Gordon Equation
  • 1926-2021 US Stock Market Return (Nominal) – Dividend Yield 5% and Dividend Growth Rate of 1.6% with 0.7% inflation
  • Estimated Nominal Return = 5% + 1.6% = 6.6%
  • Estimated Real Return = 6.6% - 0.7% Inflation = 5.9%
  • Actual Real Return = 7.35%. 7.35%-5.9% = 1.45% higher than estimated by the Gordon Equation
    • Why the difference? Stocks got more expensive. The dividend fell from 5% in 1926 to 1.26% in 2021. In 1926, it only took $20 of stock to get $1 in dividends, by 2021, you had to purchase $80 in stock to get the same $1. The "dividend multiple" quadrupled over the time frame (5/1.25 = 4). Over 96 years that annualizes out to 1.45% - exactly the gap.
  • Realized Return = Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth + Annualized Change in Dividend Multiple
  • The expected return is AKA the "Fundamental Return" of the market. This is what you would get if the dividend multiple doesn't change.
    • The preceding equation could be
    • Realized (Actual) Return = Expected (Fundamental) Return + Annualized Change in dividend multiple
  • The expected (fundamental) return is easily calculated number and more stable.
  • On the other hand, the annualized change in multiple fluctuates, sometimes wildly, and is completely unforecastable and thus unknown
  • We call this portion of the equation the "Speculative Return"
  • So, the Gordon equation can be summarized as
  • Actual Return = Fundamental Return (Dividend Yield + Dividend Growth Rate) + Speculative Return (Change in Multiples)
  • On any given year, the speculative return (change in multiple) overwhelms the fundamental return. Even over 10-year periods, real annualized returns can deviate widely from the Gordon equation estimate. Only over very long time periods, on the order of a generation, does the Gordon equation provide a reasonably accurate estimate of future returns.
  • In 2008, the dividend multiple fell by 42% and the speculative return also
  • In 1933, the dividend multiple rose by 66%.
    • In both years, the fundamental return only changed by a few percent.
• Current (2022) Estimate based on Gordon Equation
  • 1.7% Dividend Yield + 2.0% Real Dividend Growth = 3.7% (If the dividend multiple doesn't change
  • Some have suggested that stock buybacks have added a "buyback yield" This is a dubious proposition; buybacks reduce both dividend payouts and critical reinvestment in business. Most buybacks generally provide for executive option compensation, are a form of executive salary, and do not result in increased shareholder ownership of the firm. Moreover, most buybacks occur when corporations are flush with cash at high equity prices and are poorly timed.
• Around the world, stocks have performed the way they are supposed to, offering returns that are uniformly higher than those offered by bonds and bills
• English Common Law (common law institutions that protect property rights) produces high returns. The secure ownership of both stocks and bonds depends these institutions.
  • For this reason, while he thinks emerging markets (less than stellar legal systems) have a place in a well-diversified portfolio, He is not overly optimistic about them.
• Do stocks get less risky over time? No
  • In a paper by Zvi Bodie (1995) he showed over increasing time horizons, put options became more expensive
• Young, periodic savers should get down on their hands and knees and pray for a severe bear market at the beginning of their investment journey, so as to acquire shares on the cheap (assuming they can find a job that pays them well enough during those bad times)
• For the retiree who receives a bad initial return draw, stocks are risky indeed. This is known as "Sequence of Return Risks"
• For the Young saver, as long as he keeps his cool during the discouragement that attends the inevitable bear markets that all long-term investors will encounter, stock market risk is a snooze
• Estimating the returns of bonds is easy. You buy a 4% bond. You get 4%. But remember that is nominal return. Not real return
  • TIPS are another option. Principal and interest keep pace with CPI. But they have had a negative yield (-1.9%) as recently as 2021.
  • Break Even Yield (Estimated Inflation Rate) – Difference between the rates of ordinary bonds and TIPS of similar maturities.
    • As of right now (2022) the market thinks (based on the Break Even Yield of the (30-year bonds) the inflation rate will be 2.3% over 30 years.
  • Corporate bonds throw off a little higher return, but at higher risks. Companies can and do go bankrupt. Bondholders can recover some of their holdings in bankruptcy, on average, about half.
    • The most important metric in corporate bonds is the "loss rate" or the total net return lost each year to bankruptcy after recovery in court. The loss rate for Baa bonds (lowest investment grade) is around 0.2% per year.
    • The problem is that on their way to default, a bond will get sequentially downgraded
  • The longest series of corporate bond returns show that, averaged over all grades, they yield about 1.6% more than treasuries of the same maturity, about half which is lost to bankruptcy. Thus, offering about 0.8% extra return over treasures.
  • Is this 0.8% return worth the risk? No. The loss rate is normally low, but high during times of economic turbulence.
    • Bad returns in bad times AKA "Ilmanen Risk" after Antti Ilmanen
    • In other words, corporate bonds experience losses at the worst possible times. Corporate bonds are hit hardest when you are most likely to need cash to purchase stocks when they are cheap
  • In contrast to corporate bonds, a small corner of the fixed income market deals with "catastrophe bonds", whose principal is wiped out by a "trigger event" typically a hurricane or earthquake. Since hurricanes are earthquakes are uncorrelated to financial crises, they offer lower expected returns than similarly rated corporate bonds.
  • Risk is not just about how much you lose, but also, when you lose it
  • This is true of other assets as well, the classic being Gold
    • Gold often does well when stocks and bonds tank; thus, its expected return should be low, which is well reflected in its realized return. Over 2 millennia, close to 0 real return.
    • Silver has about the same long term real return (0)
  • High quality corporate bonds can be thought of as 90/10 mix of treasury bonds and equities.
  • Junk bonds something close to 50/50 treasury and equities
    • To mitigate the biggest risk to your portfolio (mental health and investment discipline) during the worst of times, it is best to keep your stocks and bonds in entirely separate mental accounts and to own only the safest fixed income assets
  • Commodities (except for Gold/Silver) are limited to futures contracts (unless you can store it) which is a zero-sum game
  • Increasing popularity of commodities futures investing has pushed up the prices of contracts resulting in a phenomenon called contango.
    • During contango the futures price is higher than the spot (current) price. And you can't access that spot price unless you have the ability to store it. You buy high and sell low when the market is in contango.
  • Real estate holds its real value and yields rental income, but owning property is more a job than an investment. And you are undiversified
  • REIT's can fix the diversification problem, but now you just own equity shares
  • Private real estate funds and syndications lie midway between individually owned property and REITs but are highly illiquid and insufficiently diversified.
    • People also forget the 2007-2009 crash and how rents fell and tenants let lease lapse
  • Cryptocurrency
  • If you believe its enthusiasts, its money freed from the specter of the governments prying eyes and printing press. You can earn interest on it, as long as you are willing to take in more crypto and don't mind the risk that the founder of the "bank" is a fraudster.
    • Crypto may well revolutionize finance, so did the appearance of stamped metal coins millennia ago, but over the centuries since these marvelous inventions, holding them in your safe or purse hasn't proved a paying proposition.
  • In the worst of times, the prices of both debt and equity can fall dramatically. To compensate their owners for the high perceived risk at such times, their expected returns must rise dramatically. Most of the time, purchases at such times do well. Unless they don't
  • The past 4 decades has been one long beer and pizza party. 2022 saw some dieting. Both financial history and simple prudence suggest the possibility of more of the same
  • Investing demands diligence and hard work, and occasionally you will suffer substantial loss. The odds are in your favor if you can stay the course through the worst of times. Maximize your odds of doing so with a nice pile of "sleeping money" (Short duration Treasuries and FDIC guaranteed CD's
• "Bad" (Value) companies have higher returns than "Good" (Growth) companies over very long timeframes
  • Because they are riskier.
  • Their cash flows tend to be less steady and they are more heavily indebted.
  • They usually do poorly during economic crises.
• Investors overestimate the growth potential of glamorous companies
  • When growth stocks exceed expectations, it does just OK, but when it fails them, look out below.
  • When value stocks excel expectations, it does very well and even when it disappoints, it isn't hurt too badly.
• Fama and French discovered the 3-factor model for returns in 1992
  • Market – stock return in excess of T-Bills
  • Small – small company stock return minus large
  • Value – value company stock return minus growth
  • Returns and SD (1926-2021)
  • Market – 6.82% and 18.47%
  • Small – 1.80% and 10.99%
  • Value – 3.37% and 12.23%
    • These factors are long/short so if you are long only, you would only get half the extra return
    • Small factor has disappeared since it was discovered in 1981.
    • The Value factor has been trending down. Why?
    • More investors are aware of the value factor and products selling them are more widely available. "Crowded Trade"
      • If we believe this, then value stocks should be more expensive relative to growth stocks. They are not.
    • Another idea is that investors have been dazzled by the growth prospects and power of the big tech firms. They are dumping their value stocks to chase the large growth stocks.
      • If we believe this to be the reason, then value stocks should be less expensive relative to growth stocks. They currently are (2022)
      • Most of the time, growth stocks are 4x more expensive than value stocks by price/book ratio.
      • In 2020, growth stocks were 11.1x more expensive. In 2022, 7.4x
      • The last time the ratios were this high was the before the dot.com bubble of the late 1990's and the great depression
    • The current data shows similar return patterns abroad.
    • Large market factor, nonexistent small factor and a middling value factor.
    • The value factor is trending down in foreign markets too and the small factor is gone just like the U.S.
    • The have discovered new factors over the last few decades
    • Momentum – high returns over the past year predicted slightly higher returns next year
      • Factor premium was 7%
      • This factor puzzled efficient market theory proponents. How could momentum have higher returns. Well, we had a momentum crash in 2009. The risk factor was hidden for so long until it showed up
    • Is it possible the high equity premium hides the small probability of a rare by large loss like momentum? Probably not. It is not secret that real equity returns can be negative for a long time
    • In the U.S., the real return was zero from 1966-1983 (17 years)
    • Italy and Austria had real equity returns of 1% over 122 years
  • How much should you expose yourself to factors? Not everyone can do it. There is nothing wrong with not tilting and owning only total market funds.
    • If you are going to tilt, he recommends value
• Shallow Risk – A loss of real capital that recovers quickly
• Deep Risk – The permanent loss of real capital
  • To deal with shallow risk, maintain deep liquidity in the form of treasuries and CD's. This allows you to weather turbulent markets, purchase stocks at low prices and keep your courage up
• 4 Horsemen of Deep Risk
  • Inflation
  • Confiscation
  • Devastation
  • Deflation
• Deflation is rare in the modern era of fiat money
• Not much financially to do about Devastation
• Confiscation can only be avoided by moving both yourself and your assets
  • Most Americans loath to renounce their citizenship
  • An option is to maintain citizenship but move assets abroad. But if you own stocks or bonds at foreign brokerages, you will encounter a barrage of IRS red tape and legal risks. The safest assets to own would be ones that produce no income. Like Gold bars in a vault or foreign real estate you don't rent out.
• Inflation is the most likely risk and one of the simplest to mitigate
  • Keep your nominal fixed income securities short. Less than 5 years
  • Inflation hurts long bonds much worse than short bonds
    • Inflation increases the stock/bond correlation
    • We saw both of these in 2022
  • Long term government bonds do provide the best protection from deflation, but inflation destroys them, which is far more likely
  • TIPS and I-Bonds in small amounts can be useful
  • Although true that stocks prices fall as inflation rises, equities still represent real claims on assets and over the very long run, seem to hold their real value
  • During the Weimar Hyperinflation Inflation of 1920-1923, equites still provided a positive real return (although a wild ride)
  • The stocks of commodities producers themselves (Gold Stocks, Oil Stocks, Base Metal Producers) can do rather well during inflation
  • He doesn't recommend the commodity futures because of crowding/contango problems mentioned above
  • Value stocks also tend to do well during inflation
  • They are usually more indebted and benefit as inflation erodes away the size of their debt
  • Their cash flows occur sooner than growth companies, so the present value of value stocks cash flows get discounted less than that of growth stocks.
• The mathematical expectation of the speculator is Zero
• 1933 article titled "Can stock market forecasters forecast?" found their (16 financial service companies, 20 fire insurance companies, and 24 newsletters) recommendations were on average, atrocious. Readers would have been better off throwing darts at the stock page
• Fama's first job in the 1950's was looking for data to use for profitable trading rules for Economics professor Harry Ernst. He uncovered platoons of them. The problem?
  • Fama's discoveries succeeded ex post but they failed ex ante.
  • Ex post is easy, ex ante is hard.
• Buffett – "Beware of past performance proofs in finance. If history books were the key to riches, the Forbes 400 list would consist of librarians."
  • Consider a stadium with 10,000 people. Flip a coin 10 times. By the end, 10 flippers will remain. It is the same for picking stocks and money managers. That doesn't mean they can turn the trick the next time.
  • Farma arrived at the same conclusion. In the long run, almost no one can time the market or pick winning stocks.
  • Farma is famous for his EMH – Efficient Market Hypothesis
  • Strong – That all information, public and private, has already been impounded into prices
  • Semi – Strong – only public, but not private, information has been impounded into prices.
  • Weak – past price action does not predict future price moves.
  • EMH consigned to the dust bin the field of "technical analysis"
  • Michael Jensen used Williams Sharpe mathematics to measure the performance of funds and discovered 3 things
  • The average fund produces a gross return approximately equal to the markets return
  • The average investor receives that market return minus expenses
  • Chance seems to "best" explain managers performance
  • It has to be this way, professional money managers are the market, so by definition, must obtain the market return before expenses.
  • The reason it is difficult for individuals to beat the market is you are competing against the collective wisdom of the market
  • Bernard Baruch – "Something everyone knows isn't worth knowing."
  • So, by the time information reaches the financial media, it can be ignored.
    • Jonathan Clements of WSJ – "I own last year's best performing fund. The problem is I bought it this year."
  • The worthlessness of newsletters, and of market strategies in general, makes perfect sense. If you could successfully time the market, you'd keep the profits for yourself.
  • Whenever you buy or sell a stock, ask yourself, who am I trading against?
  • Professional money manger
  • Warren Buffett
  • The CFO of the company
    • It's like playing tennis against an invisible opponent. And that opponent is Serena Williams.
  • Stock returns are positively skewed, which means that a very small number of companies produce the lions share of market returns.
    • Since 1926 – Only 4% of companies provided the entire equity risk premium. 96% are matching T-Bills
  • Many successful fund mangers suffer from "asset bloat" after success. This actually makes future success more difficult
    • Superstar mangers sow the seeds of their own destruction simply by growing their portfolios too large.
  • Simons Law (Medallion Fund) – the most talented investors quickly privatize their talents by shutting their portfolios to all but family and employees. If someone is skilled enough to regularly trounce the market, they don't want to manage your money.
• The most common statistical definition of risk is volatility, as measured by standard deviation (SD). But SD misses an important dimension of risk: volatility timing.
  • For Example – a portfolio of corporate bonds and another of treasury bonds will have the same volatility. But the corporate likely bite you hard during a financial crisis.
  • Few sensations are as disturbing as the realization that what you thought was money isn't.
• Charlie Munger – the prime directive of compounding is to never interrupt it.
  • A great deal of your success depends upon how you behave during the worst of times.
• Correlation – ranges from +1 to -1
  • +1 = 2 assets always move in the same direction
  • -1 = 2 assets always move in opposite directions
• Foreign stocks or bonds subject investors to not only the risks of those securities, but also the additional risk of currency fluctuation.
  • For example – a stock denominated in UK pound will rise or fall in value along with the value of that currency against the dollar
• In the long run, currency effects have a tendency to mean revert.
  • Investors should hold foreign stocks in unhedged vehicles, which is how most are done.
  • But unlike stocks, they should hedge their foreign bond exposure
  • Currency volatility greatly exceeds bond price volatility
  • A hedged foreign bond behaves similarly to a US bond
  • They incur additional hedging expenses
  • They don't carry a US government guarantee
    • He doesn't think foreign bonds are worth owning for these reasons
  • When inflation occurs, stock/bond correlations tend to be more positive (1970-80's and 2022)
• PME (Precious Metals Equity) is an asset class with persistently low correlations to stocks and bonds
  • 0.23 between 1963 and 2021
  • "Gold Bugs" prize the shelter that the metal and its miners provide during financial crises.
  • The insurance against geopolitical instability provided by gold and PME bids up their prices and lowers their future returns. As expected, the protection doesn't come for free.
• VIX (Volatility Futures) has a correlation of -0.79 with the stock market. But they exhibit severe contango where the futures price is higher than the spot (current) price
  • So, volatility options can save you against market drops, but at the cost that more than wipes out the equity risk premium. People don't sell insurance for free.
• Correlations are increasing between US and foreign stocks
  • Bruno Solnik – "Diversification fails us just when we need it the most."
  • In the short term and during crashes, it is true.
  • Spreading your stock bets around may be worthless during market meltdowns, but it proves its merit in the recovery from them
  • Wise investors care little about a horrendous year or two, as long as they can hang on.
  • Even an experienced investor can be ruined by a bad decade or two, and over very long horizons is where diversification shines
    • Imagine a person in Japan with a 100% Japanese portfolio who retired in 1990 and received a 0.53% nominal return over the next 32 years. They ran out of money within a decade.
• While low correlations among asset classes are your friends, they are hard to find. Low correlation stock and option assets are highly prized and thus see their prices bid up and have consequently low expected and realized returns
• With increasing globalized financial markets, short term correlations among stock assets have risen. The good news is that over very long periods, global diversification should still prove valuable
• There is no Asset Allocation Fairy
  • Neither a guru nor a quantitative technique that will find you an asset allocation that delivers the highest future returns or a given amount of risk
  • Don't use Mean Variance Optimized algorithms to develop your portfolio
  • Outputs are highly sensitive to their inputs, particularly asset returns
  • Optimizers are likely to overexpose the portfolio to assets that have high recent returns (but consequently have low expected future returns)
  • Some people refer to MVO as a "Error Maximizer"
  • The developer of the MVO was Dr. Markowitz
    • His portfolio was 50/50 stock bond so as to minimize his future regret. Either stocks were up and he didn't have more, or stocks were down and he was in them
  • The first step and most important step in building a portfolio is deciding your stock and bond asset allocation percentage
  • The most import part of investing is to determine how much risk is required to meet your goals and how much risk you can tolerate at each stage of your investing career.
  • Once you have figured out how much risk you are going to take during each stage of your life, how to allocate your assets among classes of stocks and bonds becomes a more tractable task.
• Because their human capital dwarfs their investment capital, young people in theory cannot invest aggressively enough. But many do not have the stomach for that kind of volatility
• The retiree by contrast has had time to become familiar with their ability to handle investment risks, but their burn rate may be high enough to fall afoul of sequence of return risk. On the other hand, if their burn rate is low enough, their actual stock/bond mix may not matter that much at all.
• Merton and Samuelson wrote a pair of papers that concluded that if investors risk tolerances remained consistent thorough their lives, then so too should their asset allocations remain the same
  • For example – Frida is a young person with a very secure job paying $50,000. This makes her human capital worth about $1,000,000. 20 years x $50,000
  • Her stock portfolio is $10,000 with 100% equity.
  • Her human capital is almost all bond like.
  • Her overall equity allocation is less than 1%. It makes no theoretical sense for her to own any bonds. Because her bond like human capital dwarfs her investment stock like capital.
    • If we take this example even further, she should actually leverage her portfolio for an equity exposure over 100%.
  • Equities are less risky for the periodic savers than for older investors.
    • Anyone under the age of 45 or so should wish for a crushing bear market so that she can acquire more stock shares at bargain prices.
    • But stocks don't fall that much without a highly compelling narrative, usually involving a financial system panic or geopolitical catastrophe, usually about once per decade
      • The reasons we are averse to financial risk are evolutionary. It was better not to take too many chances
    • Young investors though who haven't encountered serious equity losses are vulnerable to market declines and the hoopla that surrounds them
    • The primary goal of retirement savings is to cover basic living expenses over the rest of the investor's lifetime. 20-25 years is a good goal.
    • The Trinity Study (4% Burn Rate). The problem with the study was that used historical returns which are likely much higher than those currently on offer. 7% for stocks and 2% for bonds
    • So, the 4-5% burn rates of the Trinity and Bengen studies are likely to be too high going forward
    • If you estimated burn rate is much about 3.5%, you are in the danger zone going forward
      • If you can tolerate a burn rate in the 2-3.5% range, you are in good shape
    • The best thing you can do is burn down your money and hold off on Social Security till age 70. Which is the best annuity you can buy.
    • An immediate fixed annuity can also be an option. But you are taking on credit risk with this so he recommends spreading your purchases among 2 or 3 different companies to mitigate that risk
• You can't know in advance which asset allocation will be best
• Your asset allocation should be reasonable. It should center mainly on broad domestic and foreign markets and not overly emphasize small, value, REITs, Oil or precious metals equity
• More important than portfolio complexity and precise asset allocation is your ability to stay the course through thick and thin.
  • A suboptimal allocation you can execute is better than an optimal one you can't
• A foreign stock allocation between 30-50% seems reasonable.
• A small value tilt can make sense for the risk tolerant investor
• REITS, Precious Metals Equity, and Oil stocks can also make sense
• Keep your treasuries short duration (<5 years)
• A perfectly reasonable asset allocation can run the range from a basic Target Date Fund (TDF) to more than a dozen different funds with various factor and asset class tilts
• REITS provide their income in the form of dividends. Therefore, you should only hold them in tax advanced accounts
  • The tend to perform well in the aftermath of tech bubble collapses
• Precious Metals Equity and Energy stocks are only recommended for those who can tolerate complexity and want protection from inflation
• Precious Metals Equity has suffered share price loss of 70% 3 times in the last 6 decades, but it is precisely this volatility that recommends it to those with cast iron stomachs
  • The large purchase mandated by portfolio rebalancing during severe downdrafts eventually sow the seeds for large gains during the bounce backs, which saw a 3x of this asset class from the 3 market bottoms
  • This asset class requires nerves of steel and is appropriate only for the most enthusiastic of asset class junkies and should only constitute a few percent of a portfolio
  • Gold itself requires a much higher asset allocation than the PME to provide the same degree of diversification.

At popular request you can now get this as a newsletter. Sign up and maybe one day I'll be able to afford Dunkin' more than twice a week. Enjoy your weekend folks and please add anything you think I missed in the comments.

THURSDAY - OCTOBER 19

TEDxCambridge @ Citizens Bank Opera House @ 7PM Hear unique ideas and pioneering speaker talks at one of the world’s largest and most impressive independently organized TED events.
J Will Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 8PM
‘That’s Messed Up’ Podcast Live @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM Comedians and amateur detectives Liza Treyger and Kara Klenk break down a classic episode of ‘Law & Order: SVU,’ plus games, gossip and more!
‘The State’ Cast Live @ Chevalier Theatre @ 8PM Celebrating the 30th anniversary of their cult classic MTV series, the sketch comedy troupe reunites in an evening of old favorites and new material.
Sissy Castrogiovanni & The Sicilian Jazz Experience @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM Enjoy this unique fusion of contemporary jazz and traditional Sicilian music.
Lauren Daigle @ Agganis Arena @ 7PM
The Wonder Years @ House of Blues @ 6PM
Don Bronco & The Home Team @ Paradise Rock Club @ 6PM
Rawayana @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Genesis Owusu @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
Charlie Cunningham @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM

FRIDAY - OCTOBER 20

Late Nites @ MFA @ 8PM This after-hours party includes dancing and DJs, pop-up performances, exploring the galleries, art-making activities, and more.
Teen Fashion Night Out @ ICA @ 6PM Teens can attend workshops led by fashion professionals, create upcycled fashion pieces, enjoy free snacks and beverages, and connect with each other.
Michelle Wolf Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM / 10PM
Darcy & Jer Comedy Show @ Berklee Performance Center @ 8PM
Laureamor y Emidilio Live Show @ Shubert Theatre @ 8PM
‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’ Performance + Screening @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 8PM Join the original 'Magenta' Patricia Quinn for a screening of the original unedited movie with a live shadow cast, audience participation, a costume contest, and more!
Boston Philharmonic Orchestra @ Symphony Hall @ 8PM The Boston Philharmonic plays Rossini, Elgar, and Beethoven’s Symphony no. 7.
Lady A @ MGM Music Hall @ 7:30PM
The Teskey Brothers @ House of Blues @ 7PM
Faye Webster @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Upchuck
Dem Sugar - Reggae Festival @ Paradise Rock Club @ 10PM
Jordana + Dev Lemons @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Melt @ Royale @ 6PM
Sullivan King @ Big Night Live @ 7PM
Mo Lowda & The Humble @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM

SATURDAY - OCTOBER 21

Revolution vs Philadelphia Union @ Gillette Stadium @ 6PM
Patriots Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony @ Gillette Stadium @ 12PM The Patriots will host their 2023 Hall of Fame induction ceremonies for Mike Vrabel and Dante Scarnecchia.
Beyond the Spectrum: Teens @ MFA @ 10:30AM In this session, teens will learn about Ancient Egyptian religion, culture, and history through examining the artworks and artifacts in the MFA collection.
Wild Kratts Live @ The Hanover Theatre @ 1PM / 4:30PM Dive into another family-friendly Wild Kratts adventure with the Kratt brothers as they combine exciting live action show with animation.
Michael Blaustein Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7PM / 9:45PM
Randy Rainbow Comedy Show @ Chevalier Theatre @ 7PM
Sonic Symphony @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 8PM Sonic Symphony is an immersive live experience that celebrates more than three decades of music from SEGA’s iconic mascot.
Enrique Iglesias, Ricky Martin, & Pitbull @ TD Garden @ 7PM
Carlos Vives @ Wang Theatre @ 8PM
Coreyfest feat Tyler Hubbard @ House of Blues @ 7:30PM
Neil Frances @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Broadway Rave @ Brighton Music Hall @ 9:30PM
Lucinda Williams @ Orpheum Theatre @ 8PM
Michael Brun @ Big Night Live @ 6PM
Between Friends @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
A. Savage @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM

SUNDAY - OCTOBER 22

Patriots vs Buffalo Bills @ Gillette Stadium @ 1PM
SomerStreets: Monster Mash @ Somerville Avenue @ 2PM SomerStreet is closing busy streets for a day of family fun complete with live music, dancing, vintage market, and a Halloween costume parade!
John Campanelli Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 7PM
Switchfoot @ The Wilbur @ 7PM
Bahamas @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Frenship @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
The Brook & The Bluff @ Royale @ 6:30PM
Daniel Donato @ The Sinclair @ 8PM

ALL WEEKEND

THURSDAY & FRIDAY - Haunted Histories After Dark Tours @ Peabody Essex Museum Hear haunting tales of murder and mystery based on real events, told by storytellers dressed in period garb.
THURSDAY & FRIDAY - Dave Chappelle Live Show @ TD Garden @ 7:30PM
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Ian Bagg Live Show @ Laugh Boston
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - Gregory Alan Isakov @ Roadrunner @ 7:30PM With The Milk Carton Kids
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - Boo at the Zoo @ Stone Zoo @ 10AM This year’s Haunted Happenings include a trick-or-treat trail, costume contests, education stations, tasty treats, and more family-friendly activities.
All weekend - New England Renaissance Festival @ King Richard’s Fairgrounds LAST CHANCE - King Richard’s Faire is the premiere fall entertainment event for all things Renaissance.
All weekend - Head of the Charles Regatta Since 1965, rowers have come from near and far to take part in the world’s largest Regatta.
All weekend - Mass STEM Week Massachusetts STEM Week is an annual statewide event highlighting the exciting opportunities and sides to a STEM education for kids and teens. Follow the link to see all participating organizations and institutions.
All weekend - Boston Caribbean Fashion Week Discover and celebrate the diversity and beauty of Caribbean culture through fashion and style.
All weekend - Boston Asian American Film Festival This year, BAAFF celebrates 15 years of empowering Asian American filmmakers and showcasing Asian American experiences and perspectives.
All weekend - Independent Film Festival Boston - Fall Focus @ The Brattle Enjoy a mini IFFBoston with screenings of some of the best recent releases, including ‘Eileen,’ ‘Monster,’ ‘Fingernails,’ and more!
All weekend - ‘Yuck Fest’ Comedy and Music Festival The weekend-long celebration of music and comedy comes to the East Coast boasting local and national talents like Daniel Van Kirk, Bethany Van Delft, Zahid Dewji, and many more!
All weekend - Beethoven Five Piano Concertos @ Symphony Hall Andris Nelson and Boston Symphony Orchestra take on Beethoven’s piano concertos 1 through 5 over this weekend concert series.
All weekend - Mr. Swindle’s Traveling Peculiarium and Drink-Ory Garden Show @ Harpoon Brewery This unique and unforgettable show blends big-top theater and sophisticated vaudevillian-style comedy with great adult beverages and fare.
All weekend - ‘The Book of Life’ Performance @ Emerson Cutler Majestic Theatre Combining powerful live drumming and reading of touching letters by ordinary Rwandans, this joyous show is both thought-provoking and healing.
All weekend - ‘The Glass Menagerie’ Play @ The Hanover Theatre LAST CHANCE - A family drama of great tenderness, charm, and beauty, ‘The Glass Menagerie’ is an icon of the American theater.
All weekend - ‘Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street’ Musical @ Arrow Street Arts Promising “a Brechtian take on a Sondheim classic,” Moonbox Productions is resurrects this perfectly morbid morsel of musical theater just as Halloween season is kicking into full gear.
All weekend - ‘Fat Ham’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre Don’t miss the Huntington’s production of this smart and sharp reinvention of Shakespeare’s masterpiece that took Broadway by storm.

ONGOING

Ongoing - ‘Revolution’s Edge’ Play @ Old North Church @ 5PMHistory comes to life in this three-man play set in the 1770s before the famous steeple lighting that warned of British troop movements. Running Thursday and Saturday.
Ongoing - Boston Lights: A Lantern Experience @ Franklin Park Zoo @ 6PM Come face-to-face with an ice-breathing dragon and more fantastical creatures in a frozen mythical land brought to you by Boston Lights.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Lady Gaga, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium
Ongoing - ‘Forecast Form: Art in the Caribbean Diaspora, 1990s - Today’ Exhibition @ ICA Anchored in the concept of diaspora, the exhibition surveys the works of 28 artists of Caribbean descent and aims to challenge conventions and propose new ways of looking at and understanding the region.
Ongoing - ‘Fashioned by Sargent’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring over 50 artworks by the influential American artist John Singer Sargent, the exhibition explores his complex relationship with his affluent clients and their clothes.
Ongoing - ‘Strong Women in Renaissance Italy’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition explores the lives and experiences of women in Renaissance Italy and offers new perspectives on female creativity, power, and agency.
Ongoing - 'Matthew Wong: The Realm of Appearances' Exhibition @ MFASee the full scope of Wong's works created during his short but vibrant career.
Ongoing - 'Tiny Treasures: The Magic of Miniatures' Exhibition @ MFAFeaturing ancient and contemporary works in a surprising array of forms, this exhibition explores miniaturization in art and how artists and artisans play with our perception of scale.
Ongoing - ‘Otherworldly Realms of Wu Junyong’ Exhibition @ MFAInspired by Chinese folklore and Greek mythology, Wu Junyong’s mixed-media works seamlessly blend diverse historical traditions with his contemporary experience to express human emotions, conflicts, and aspirations that transcend time and borders.
Ongoing - ‘Gu Wenda: United Nations’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex MuseumGu Wenda’s awe-inspiring installations immerse visitors in a vision of shared humanity, global connectivity, and mass participation.
Ongoing - ‘Objects of Addiction: Opium, Empire, and the Chinese Art Trade’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the entwined histories of the opium trade and the Chinese art market between the late 18th and early 20th centuries.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

At popular request you can now get this as a newsletter. Sign up and maybe one day I'll be able to afford Dunkin' more than twice a week. Enjoy your weekend folks and please add anything you think I missed in the comments.

THURSDAY - OCTOBER 5

Wurlitzer Organ Concert @ Hanover Theatre @ 12PM Enjoy an entertaining and informative musical journey featuring the largest and most versatile theatre pipe organ in New England.
Carin Leon @ TD Garden @ 8PM
St. Paul & The Broken Bones @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 8PM With Y La Bamba
Raphael Saadiq @ Orpheum Theatre @ 8PM
Yves Tumor @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Crack Cloud, Izzy Spears, & Thoom
Belly @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Becky Hill @ Royale @ 7:30PM
underscores @ The Sinclair @ 8:30PM
Gimme Gimme Disco @ Big Night Live @ 8PM

FRIDAY - OCTOBER 6

[‘Pan’s Labyrinth’ Screening @ MFA @ 7PM]{https://www.mfa.org/event/film/pans-labyrinth?event=108071) Part of the Halloween special ‘Bloody Gorgeous: The Art of Horror’ program.
First Fridays @ ICA @ 6PM This month’s ICA party theme is Fire + Ice! Wear your fiery reds or ice-cold whites and blues and enjoy the museum’s special after-hours program.
‘Living a Triggered Life’ Podcast Live @ MoS @ 7:30PM Join Keith and Roxann, a Black couple who have their own trauma histories, talk about current events, love, mental health, relationships, and family dynamics.
Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino LIVE @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM Comedians and Internet personalities Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino take their hit podcast ‘Bad Friends’ to a live audience.
Carminho @ Berkelee Performance Center @ 8PM
John Mayer @ TD Garden @ 8PM With JP Saxe
Gucci Mane @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Luh Tyler
Carly Pearce @ House of Blues @ 7PM
Andy Frasco @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM
Miya Folick @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
George Clanton @ Royale @ 6PM
Wolves in the Throne Room @ Big Night Live @ 6PM
Geese @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
World Afrika @ Big Night Live @ 10:30PM

SATURDAY - OCTOBER 7

​
Mariee Sioux w/ support from Assorted Orchids Saturday, October 7 @ The Overlook in Lowell (5th floor of Mill No.5) Doors Open at 7pm Mariee Sioux was at the vanguard of the 'freak folk' movement in the mid 2000s alongside Devendra Banhart, Vetiver, and Joanna Newsom.
South Boston Street Festival @ East Broadway Enjoy live entertainment, dance performances, local food vendors, and a market with over 100 merchants.
Oktoberfest @ Hood Park @ 12PM Enjoy live music, beer garden food vendors, a local artisan market, and other family-friendly activities.
Jerry Seinfeld LIVE @ Wang Theatre @ 7PM / 9:30PM
Opening Night @ Symphony Hall @ 6PM Enjoy BSO’s From Austria to America program including the repertoire of Beethoven, Mozart, Ellington, & Simon.
‘Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse’ in Concert @ Emerson Colonial Theatre @ 2PM / 7PM Experience the iconic hip-hop based score interpreted for classical orchestra.
Candlelight: A Tribute To Taylor Swift @ Cambridge First Church @ 7PM / 9PM Discover the classical reiteration of Taylor Swift’s music at First Church under the gentle glow of candlelight.
Jazz Along the Charles @ DCR Charles River Esplanade @ 2PM One hundred Boston-based musicians, in twenty-five jazz ensembles, will perform a single Boston-inspired setlist in their own style.
Gipsy Kings and Nicolas Reyes @ Hanover Theatre @ 8PM
Kim Petras @ MGM Music Hall @ 8PM
The Midight @ House of Blues @ 7PM
G Flip @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Dogs in a Pile @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
My Kinda Country Night @ Big Night Live @ 8PM
MHS Together Again @ Royale @ 6PM

SUNDAY - OCTOBER 8

Celtics vs 76ers @ TD Garden @ 6PM
Patriots vs Saints @ Gillette Stadium @ 1PM
Game Grumps LIVE @ House of Blues @ 7PM Arin Hanson and Dan Avidan’s comedy gaming show presents the live Tournament of Gamers.
Brittany Brave Stand Up @ Laugh Boston @ 8PM
Anoushka Shankar @ Berkelee Performance Center @ 8PM
Kiana Lede @ Big Night Live @ 7PM
Blanco White @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM
Can Ducrot @ The Sinclair @ 4PM / 8PM
CHAI @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM

All weekend

THURSDAY & FRIDAY - Mozart, Beethoven, Maskats, & Strauss in Concert @ Symphony Hall BSO and Andries Nelson present a rich program of classical compositions.
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Erik Griffin Stand Up @ Laugh Boston
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Julio Diaz Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
FRIDAY & SUNDAY - Handel + Haydn Society in Concert @ Symphony Hall Jonathan Cohen launches his first season as Handel + Haydn's artistic director with Handel’s epic tale of triumph over adversity.
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - Jordan Davis @ Roadrunner @ 7:30PM With Kameron Marlowe & Avery Anna
All weekend - Daniel Sloss Stand Up @ The Wilbur
All weekend - New England Renaissance Festival @ King Richard’s Fairgrounds King Richard’s Faire is the premiere fall entertainment event for all things Renaissance.
All weekend - HONK! Festival of Activist Street Bands HONK! Is a free, grassroots festival with fun activities, live entertainment, and music for the whole family.
All weekend - ‘The Glass Menagerie’ Play @ The Hanover Theatre A family drama of great tenderness, charm, and beauty, ‘The Glass Menagerie’ is an icon of the American theater.
All weekend - ‘Fat Ham’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre Don’t miss the Huntington’s production of this smart and sharp reinvention of Shakespeare’s masterpiece that took Broadway by storm.
All weekend - ‘The Full Monty’ Musical @ North Shore Musical Theatre LAST CHANCE - This heartwarming musical comedy is filled with great music, hilarious characters, and the most highly anticipated closing number of any musical ever!
All weekend - ‘POTUS’ Musical @ BCA Calderwood Pavilion Inspired by real-life events, this uproarious, all-female farce took Broadway by storm in 2022.
All weekend - ‘DIASPORA!’ Play @ Mosesian Center for the Arts An exploration of identity and familial love, the play follows Sunny, a black writer from Boston on a journey uncovering the mysterious story of her lineage and family.
All weekend - ‘Prayer for the French Republic’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre LAST CHANCE - Written by the acclaimed playwright Joshua Harmon, the play follows generations of a Jewish family in Paris as they are forced to question their sense of home and belonging.
All weekend - ‘Arsenic and Old Lace’ Play @ Marblehead Little Theatre Perfect October play, this black comedy revolves around the Brewster family, descendants of the Mayflower settlers, now composed mostly of maniacs and murderers.

Ongoing

Ongoing - ‘Revolution’s Edge’ Play @ Old North Church @ 5PMHistory comes to life in this three-man play set in the 1770s before the famous steeple lighting that warned of British troop movements. Running Thursday and Saturday.
Ongoing - Boston Lights: A Lantern Experience @ Franklin Park Zoo @ 6PM Come face-to-face with an ice-breathing dragon and more fantastical creatures in a frozen mythical land brought to you by Boston Lights.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS PlanetariumMuseum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Lady Gaga, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium
Ongoing - ‘Forecast Form: Art in the Caribbean Diaspora, 1990s - Today’ Exhibition @ ICA NEW - Anchored in the concept of diaspora, the exhibition surveys the works of 28 artists of Caribbean descent and aims to challenge conventions and propose new ways of looking at and understanding the region.
Ongoing - ‘Strong Women in Renaissance Italy’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition explores the lives and experiences of women in Renaissance Italy and offers new perspectives on female creativity, power, and agency.
Ongoing - 'Matthew Wong: The Realm of Appearances' Exhibition @ MFASee the full scope of Wong's works created during his short but vibrant career.
Ongoing - 'Tiny Treasures: The Magic of Miniatures' Exhibition @ MFAFeaturing ancient and contemporary works in a surprising array of forms, this exhibition explores miniaturization in art and how artists and artisans play with our perception of scale.
Ongoing - 'Wedding Fashion and Traditions' Exhibition @ MFAThe exhibition explores the origins and development of wedding customs in the United States through fashion, jewelry, and photography.
Ongoing - 'E.Jane: Drenched in Light' Exhibition @ MFAE. Jane's work explores the labor and inner lives of Black women and the future of Blackness and queerness.
Ongoing - ‘Otherworldly Realms of Wu Junyong’ Exhibition @ MFAInspired by Chinese folklore and Greek mythology, Wu Junyong’s mixed-media works seamlessly blend diverse historical traditions with his contemporary experience to express human emotions, conflicts, and aspirations that transcend time and borders.
Ongoing - ‘Gio Swaby: Fresh Up’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum Swaby’s mixed media art explores the intersections of Blackness and womanhood, creating unique portraits using photography and textile.
Ongoing - ‘Gu Wenda: United Nations’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex MuseumGu Wenda’s awe-inspiring installations immerse visitors in a vision of shared humanity, global connectivity, and mass participation.
Ongoing - ‘Objects of Addiction: Opium, Empire, and the Chinese Art Trade’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the entwined histories of the opium trade and the Chinese art market between the late 18th and early 20th centuries.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT MuseumMIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

Check out our full Durham events calendar.
If you'd like to add an event to our calendar, submit an event here. Please check with the event organizers to see if events change due to weather. Have a great weekend!

May Featured Events

Moulin Rouge! The Musical at DPAC

• Enter a world of splendor and romance, of eye-popping excess, of glitz, grandeur, and glory! A world where Bohemians and aristocrats rub elbows and revel in electrifying enchantment. Welcome to Moulin Rouge! The Musical! Baz Luhrmann’s revolutionary film comes to life onstage, remixed in a new musical mash-up extravaganza.
• Today - May 14
• $35+

William Shakespeare’s The Tempest in Durham Central Park

• Prospero the exiled magician and her teenage daughter Miranda live on a desert island, with nothing but airy spirits (and Caliban the monster) for company. But one night, a magical storm brings them a ship full of characters from Prospero’s past – the King of Naples, his handsome son Ferdinand, their scheming courtiers, and Prospero’s own treacherous brother Antonio. Can young love manage to bloom while the humans fight for power and the magical creatures for their freedom?
• Come and enjoy this classic tale in a family-friendly outdoor format! Audience members are encouraged to bring food and non-alcoholic beverages, as well as comfortable seating.
• May 11 and 12 at 7:30 p.m.
• May 14 at 2:00 p.m.
• $10+

Venue Weekend Schedules

Events at The Carolina Theatre

• Thu, May 11 at 7:00 p.m. - World Ballet Series: Cinderella
• Fri, May 12 at 8:00 p.m. - Leonid & Friends: A Tribute to the Music of Chicago
• Sat, May 12 at 11:00 a.m. - Catch the Bluegrass Bug with Slippery Hill Bluegrass
• Sat, May 13 at 7:00 p.m. - Bored Teachers Comedy Tour
• Sun, May 14 at 3:00 p.m. - Trumpets and Grieeeg!

Events at The Pinhook

• Thu, May 11 at 7:30 p.m. - Miko Marks + Rissi Palmer with Charly Lowry
• Fri, May 12 at 9:00 p.m. - Nappy Head Funk Army / Shrub(B) / King Akira
• Sat, May 13 at 7:00 p.m. - Feminist Bird Trivia
• Sat, May 13 at 10:00 p.m. - Queer Agenda Dance Party with DJ Wicked & Friends
• Sun, May 14 at 8:00 p.m. - Rodes Baby / Otnes / Ins Kino

Events at The Fruit

• Thu, May 11 at 8:00 p.m. - Local Produce: Bardo Bloom with Kiki / Bijana / UTLT BXTC
• Fri, May 12 at 9:00 p.m. - Matroda
• Sun, May 14 at 7:00 p.m. - Koyal with Whoop!

Live Music at Blue Note Grill

• Thu, May 11 at 7:00 p.m. - David Quick's Jazz Combo
• Fri, May 12 at 6:00 p.m. - The Duke Street Dogs
• Fri, May 12 at 9:15 p.m. - Jamie McLean Band
• Sat, May 13 at 7:30 p.m. - Play it Forward Band

Events at Moon Dog Meadery

• Thursdays - Free Board Games
• Thu, May 11 at 6:00 p.m. - Guildhall Board Game Night
• Thu, May 11 at 7:00 p.m. - Trivia
• Fri, May 12 at 8:00 p.m. - 2nd Friday Blues Dance Night (lesson at 7:30 p.m.)
• Sat, May 13 at 8:00 p.m. - Live Music - John Rodney
• Sun, May 14 at 6:30 p.m. - Moon Dog Open Mic

Live Music at Sharp 9 Gallery

• Fri, May 12 at 8:00 p.m. - Thrio
• Sat, May 13 at 8:00 p.m. - Jim Ketch Swingtet

Events at Arcana

• Thu, May 11 - Wild Roots Rising and Tarot with Virginia
• Fri, May 12 - Daniel DeLorenzo & Theous Jones and Tarot with Virginia
• Sat, May 13 - River Otters and Tarot with Rene
• Sun, May 14 - Eric Lee Hardt & friends feat. Jon Ward Beyle and Tarot with Emily

Events at Rubies on Five Points

• Fri, May 12 at 10:00 p.m. - DJ Bagaceiro Presents: Carnaval Constante
• Sat, May 13 at 9:00 p.m. - Shallow Cuts Presents Uno Lipo
• Sun, May 14 at 8:00 p.m. - The Bronzed Chorus

Events at Durty Bull Brewing Company

• Thu, May 11
  • 5:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. - Food Truck: El Jefecito
  • 7:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. - Thursday Trivia with Nick
• Fri, May 12
  • 5:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. - Tacos Paradise (5-9)
  • 8:00 p.m. - 11:00 p.m. - Open Mic Stand-up Comedy
• Sat, May 13
  • 4:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. - Live Music: Pam Ross
  • 5:00 p.m - 9:00 p.m. - Food Truck: Tacos Mama Chava
  • 8:00 p.m. - 10:00 p.m. - Down & Durty Burlesque
• Sun, May 14
  • 1:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. - Food Truck: Wrap 'n Trap
  • 1:00 p.m. - 3:00 p.m. - MotoGP Watch Party
  • 2:00 p.m. - 4:00 p.m. - Hammered Trivia with Thor

Live Comedy at Mettlesome

• Thu, May 11 at 7:00 p.m. The Racket - See indie improv teams from around the Triangle show off their stuff!
• Thu, May 11 at 8:00 p.m Standup Comedy Open Mic
• Fri, May 12 at 8:00 p.m. Well Seasoned - All Durham. All Black. All comedy.
• Fri, May 12 at 9:00 p.m. Hush Hush - Improv inspired by anonymous secrets from the audience.
• Sat, May 13 at 8:00 p.m. Mint Condition Standup Showcase
• Sat, May 13 at 9:00 p.m. Golden Age ft. Bulldog Ensemble Theater - The cast of Golden Age interviews local artists about their work to inspire an evening of comedy.

Events at Glass Jug Beer Lab in RTP

• Every Friday from 5:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m. - RTP Food Truck Fridays

Events at Glass Jug Beer Lab in Downtown Durham

• Thu, May 11 from 7:00 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. - Live Music in the Taproom
• May 12-14 - Weekend Food Trucks

Local Sports

Carolina Flyers at Durham County Stadium

• The Flyers are a professional ultimate team in Durham playing in the South Division of the American Ultimate Disc League.
• Sat, May 13 at 6:00 p.m.
• $12 (free for kids 12 and under)

NCAA Men's Lacrosse 1st Round at Koskinen Stadium

• Sun, May 14 at 5:00 p.m.
• $6+

Duke Baseball at Durham Bulls Athletic Park

• May 12-14
• vs Georgia Tech
• $8-10

Thursday, May 11

Thirsty Thursdays at Dashi

• Each month Dashi's Thirsty Thursday drink specials revolve around a monthly theme – spirits, cocktails, special ingredients, brand, location, etc. – with new sips every Thursday. Learn more about upcoming themes on their website or visit them in person – there's always something new to try from their expansive bar!
• 5:00 p.m. - 10:00 p.m.

Vinyl Night with DJ Deckades at Gizmo Brew Works

• Enjoy fresh vibes on the patio with DJ Deckades. Bring your own vinyl to share or just listen to what the DJ is spinning.
• 6:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m.
• Free admission

Boulders & Brews Meetup at Triangle Rock Club - Durham

• Show up and climb at TRC Durham, then head over to Hi-Wire for some brews. Don't worry if it's your first time or haven't bouldered before; everyone's welcome.
• Your first visit to the gym with the Meetup includes free admission and gear rental, and subsequent visits with the meetup are $15 and include harness rental (outside of meetups, day pass rates of $19 apply and do not include rentals).
• 6:30 p.m. - 8:30 p.m.

BEERthoven with Alex Fiterstein & Jewish For Good Food Pantry at Bull City Ciderworks

• The Chamber Orchestra of the Triangle musicians and guest artists leave the concert stage to give you a front row seat for BEERthoven. Produced in partnership with a collection of local non-profit organizations in the Triangle, these evenings help support local causes while providing you with an unforgettable musical experience.
• 7:30 p.m.
• Free (suggested donation $25)

Trivia Night w/Big Slow Tom at Clouds Brewing Brightleaf Square

• Join Clouds Durham for Big Slow Tom's Trivia Night, every Thursday. Win some prizes, drink some beer, and show your smarts.
• Enjoy $4 select draft and $5 rotating bartender's choice all night.
• 7:30 p.m.
• Free admission

Friday, May 12

Tasting at Ten at Counter Culture Coffee

• Every Friday morning at 10 am, Counter Culture Coffee opens their Training Centers to coffee lovers who want to learn more about Counter Culture Coffee’s high-quality, sustainably sourced menu.
• 10:00 a.m.
• Free, but donations accepted

Saturday, May 13

Durham Farmers’ Market at Durham Central Park

• The Durham Farmers’ Market offers locally grown fruits and vegetables, meats, eggs, cut flowers, artisanal cheeses and breads, home-baked pies, honey, handmade chocolates, preserves, local wines, handmade soaps, fresh pasta, and artwork of all sorts!
• 8:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.
• Free admission

South Durham Farmers' Market at Greenwood Commons Shopping Center

• The market strives to support new and growing farms and vendors in the greater Durham area, and they are also home to some of the most iconic Durham brands around.
• 8:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.
• Free admission

parkrun Durham at Southern Boundaries Park

• A free, fun, and friendly weekly 5k community event. Walk, jog, run, volunteer, or spectate. It's up to you!
• 8:00 a.m.
• Free admission

Crafternoons at Gizmo Brew Works

• Free pint with purchase of craft box. Choose from a variety of craft packages available for all ages.
• 12:00 p.m. - 10:00 p.m.

The Georgia Thunderbolts with Veronica Lewis at Motorco Music Hall

• Hailing from Rome, GA at the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains, The Georgia Thunderbolts rise up with a scorching signature style steeped in soulful southern swagger, blistering blues, and raw rock.
• Veronica Lewis is one of the most exciting, emerging talents in the Indie Roots world. Bending genres from the Bayou to the north country, Lewis combines the true language of the Blues with the energy of early rock ‘n rollers.
• 8:00 p.m.
• $15 advance, $20 door

Sunday, May 14

Al Strong Presents Jazz Brunch at Alley Twenty Six

• Al Strong, the Grammy-nominated jazz trumpeter, composer and recording artist, will bring a rotating lineup of musicians to perform during Sunday brunch at Durham's Alley Twenty Six. Weather permitting the band will perform in the bar’s namesake alley.
• Brunch from 10:30 a.m. - 2:00 p.m.
• Music 12:00 p.m. - 2:00 p.m.

Trivia at Navigator Beverage Co.

• Hosted by the Triangle’s Trivia team, Hammered Trivia, gather your team and post up to compete for prizes and enjoy an afternoon of great drinks, great friends, and great games.
• 2:00 p.m. - 4:00 p.m.
• Free admission

Something Wonderful: A Tribute to Nancy Wilson at Hayti Heritage Center

• Part of the Black American Music Series at Hayti
• 6:00 p.m.
• $15 advance, $20 door

Running Art Exhibits

Jim McKeon, Featured Artist at 5 Points Gallery

• The focus of the show is Jim’s epic new commission piece, Bridging The Gap, which will hang in the gallery for only the duration of the show before it goes into a private collection. His previous work, Breaking Glass Ceilings, is now part of the permanent collection at the Metropolitan Opera House in New York.
• Runs through May 13
• Free admission

Beyond the Surface: Collage, Mixed Media and Textile Works from the Collection at the Nasher

• This exhibition includes approximately 40 works, primarily from the Nasher Museum’s collection. With a focus on collage, mixed media and textile works, Beyond the Surface explores how artists bring together disparate materials and ideas to create artworks that engage with all audiences.
• Tue-Fri from 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. Sun from 12:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m.
• Runs through May 14
• Free admission

Patrimonio Heritage at John Hope Franklin Center Gallery

• A series of drawing interventions on “Llanchama” (Amazonian tree bark) by Peruvian/American artist Renzo Ortega.
• Mon-Fri from 8:00 a.m. - 6:00 p.m.
• Runs through May 18
• Free admission

Exhibits at 21c Museum Hotel

• Whitney Stanley: We Just Be in the Vault Gallery
  • Runs through May 2023
• Truth or Dare: A Reality Show
  • Runs through March 2024
• Open 24 hours
• Free admission

“Extra-Spectral” at the Durham Art Guild Truist Gallery

• This exhibit highlights several NC-based artists that, on the surface, use colors that are “extra” (which is where their commonality ends) to evoke their intent through a combination of this color with forms and imagery as well as the concepts embedded in color’s many identities. Artists Jane Cheek, Jerstin Crosby, Zach Storm, Tonya Solley Thornton and Leif Zikade all require color to play a primary role in their work and their relationship to an audience.
• Mon–Sat from 9:00 a.m. - 9:00 p.m. and Sun from 1:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m.
• Runs through June 4
• Free admission

Spirit in the Land at the Nasher

• Spirit in the Land is a contemporary art exhibition that examines today’s urgent ecological concerns from a cultural perspective, demonstrating how intricately our identities and natural environments are intertwined. Through their artwork, 30 artists show us how rooted in the earth our most cherished cultural traditions are, how our relationship to land and water shapes us as individuals and communities
• Tue-Fri from 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. Sun from 12:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m.
• Runs through Jul 9
• Free admission

Andy Warhol: You Look Good in Pictures at the Nasher

• Andy Warhol: You Look Good in Pictures explores the breadth of the artist’s relationship with photography through several distinct bodies of work including screenprints of celebrities, all of which were taken from photographs, a group of Polaroids and black and white snapshots illustrating his social circles, and an early silent film of the curator Henry Geldzahler from 1964.
• Tue-Fri from 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. Sun from 12:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m.
• Runs through Aug 27
• Free admission

Art of Peru at the Nasher

• This gallery features ceramics, textiles, metalwork and carvings produced by ancient cultures across what is known as present-day Peru.
• Tue-Fri from 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. Sun from 12:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m.
• Runs through Dec 2
• Free admission

Petyr & The Plumms

I want to talk about the deep, strong 'rhyme' that exists between Littlefinger and the Plumms, including most prominently Brown Ben Plumm.
Before I talk about Brown Ben, though, let's talk about Petyr and Peter and Peter. And Dennis.

Petyrs & Peters & Littlefingers & Plum(m)s

Littlefinger's given name is, of course, Petyr.
It so happens that there is a Petyr Plumm in The Hedge Knight graphic novel. This is most curious, since the comic adaptations are otherwise entirely about cutting, not adding, information.
Comics aside, it so happens that House Plumm also boasts a Peter Plumm. (ASOS Appenix & AFFC Appendix)
"Peter" is a penis joke of a name, although not so much as "Petyr Littlefinger".
Reviewing, "Petyr" is a mash-up of (a) "Peter", which [means penis], and (b) the ever-horny and always-erect [Satyrs] of myth.
Meanwhile "Littlefinger" is a small penis joke that's called out as such three times in the text:

"Alayne is the Lord Protector's natural daughter," he told his cousin gruffly.
"Littlefinger's little finger has been busy," said Lyn Corbray, with a wicked smile. Belmore laughed, and Alayne could feel the color rising in her cheeks. (AFFC Alayne I)
Who could be a better husband than our own bold Lord Protector? Though I do wish he had a better name than Littlefinger. How little is it, do you know?"
"His finger?" She blushed again. "I don't . . . I never . . ." (AFFC Alayne II)
"I'd sooner marry Lord Petyr. Then I'd be your mother. How little is his finger, I ask you?"
Alayne did not dignify that question with an answer. (TWOW Alayne I)

(Catelyn's belief that Edmure named Petyr "Littlefinger" because he was small and from the smallest Finger—

Her brother Edmure had given him that name, long ago at Riverrun. His family's modest holdings were on the smallest of the Fingers, and Petyr had been slight and short for his age. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

—is a paradigmatic example of unreliable narrator: The boys weren't gonna tell the naive young lady what was really meant. [Even if you for whatever reason need to believe Cat's explanation is the (innocent) truth, it remains that "Littlefinger" is used as a penis joke, in-world.])
So it's 'interesting', that "Peter Plumm" is paired in the appendices of ASOS and AFFC with a brother, "Dennis", since Peter + Dennis = Penis. Plus they're the Plumms, whereas "plums" is slang for testacles. (https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=plums)
For what it's worth, by the way, Peter and Dennis Plumm are Littlefinger's physical opposite. Pointedly so, as if yin and yang:

[Peter and Dennis Plumm] were big, fleshy fellows with thick necks…

"Big and fleshy"? Littlefinger's "small" and "slight".
"Thick necks?" Littlefinger is "slender", and he employs Maester Colemon, whose defining physical characteristic is his "ridiculously long and skinny neck". (AFFC Alayne II)
(As to what else might be "big" and "fleshy" with a "thick neck"… see again "Peter" + "Dennis".)

Ben Plumm

When most readers think of the Plumms, though, they naturally think of Brown Ben Plumm. A great many details about Ben seem contrived so as to 'rhyme' him with Littlefinger. We may as well start with the obvious fact that penises are at the center of both men's stories.

Ben Plumm & The Six Foot Cock

Where "Petyr Littlefinger" is a double penis joke, about a small penis no less, Ben Plumm tells Dany all about his ancestor with a giant dick:

This old Plumm was a lord, though, must have been a famous fellow in his day, the talk of all the land. The thing was, begging your royal pardon, he had himself a cock six foot long."
The three bells in Dany's braid tinkled when she laughed. "You mean inches, I think."
"Feet," Brown Ben said firmly. "If it was inches, who'd want to talk about it, now? Your Grace."
Dany giggled like a little girl. "Did your grandmother claim she'd actually seen this prodigy?"
"That the old crone never did." (ASOS Daenerys V)

The thing is, while Edmure may have joked about the size of Petyr's "Littlefinger", all evidence suggests he'd be less shamed by "old Plumm's" six foot cock than most:

"Petyr," her aunt moaned. "Oh, Petyr, Petyr, sweet Petyr, oh oh oh. There, Petyr, there. That's where you belong." Lady Lysa's singer launched into a bawdy version of "Milady's Supper," but even his singing and playing could not drown out Lysa's cries. "Make me a baby, Petyr," she screamed, "make me another sweet little baby. Oh, Petyr, my precious, my precious, PEEEEEETYR!" Her last shriek was so loud that it set the dogs to barking, and two of her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Prodigies

While Dany uses the odd term "prodigy" to refer to Ben's ancestor with the great schlong, Littlefinger-the-walking-penis-joke was himself a literal [prodigy], rising on merit in his teens and early 20s from nothing to Master of Coin:

Ten years ago, Jon Arryn had given him a minor sinecure in customs… Littlefinger's rise had been arrow-swift. Within three years of his coming to court, he was master of coin and a member of the small council… (ACOK Tyrion IV)
Petyr… had a little pointed chin beard now, and threads of silver in his dark hair, though he was still shy of thirty. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

Old Crones

Ben Plumm calls his grandmother an "old crone", a term that can be defined as a "witch" or "witchlike old women". (https://thefreedictionary.com/crone)
Littlefinger is Lord of Harrenhal. His noble forebears there include the witchy Mad Danelle Lothston and the witchy Alys Rivers, and Harrenhal is perhaps the setting of Jenny's Song — named for the witchy Jenny of Oldstones and a favorite of the Ghost of High Heart, a "woods witch" and "old" "crone" — given its lyrics about a high hall of kings who are gone—

High in the halls of the kings who are gone, Jenny would dance with her ghosts

—and the Ghost referring to Harrenhal as "the hall of kings"—

"In the hall of kings, the goat sits alone and fevered as the great dog descends on him." (ASOS Arya VIII)

—and this:

Lady Whent, last of her line, who dwelt with her ghosts in the cavernous vaults of Harrenhal; (AGOT Catelyn V)

Smiling. Amiable.

Ben:

Plumm had an amiable look to him, especially when he smiled. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

A… smiling, genial man… (ACOK Tyrion IV)
A moment later Lord Baelish entered through the tall doors in the rear, smiling. He chatted amiably with Ser Balon and Ser Dontos as he made his way to the front. (AGOT Sansa V)

All Sham

Ben:

It was all sham. Those smiles never touched Plumm's eyes… (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

He had grey-green eyes that did not smile when his mouth did. (AGOT Sansa II)
Littlefinger smiled with his mouth, but not his eyes. (AFFC Alayne I)
"Oh, I think you do," said Littlefinger, with one of those smiles that did not reach his eyes. (TWOW Alayne I)

Cautious Greed

Ben:

[G]reed hid behind a veil of caution. Hungry, but wary, this one. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

Littlefinger looked like a boy who had just taken a furtive bite from a honeycomb. He was trying to watch for bees, but the honey was so sweet. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Sheepshit & Sewers

Ben, while thinking about walking through the shit-filled sewers of Meereen:

Brown Ben made a face. (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger, mere seconds before he walks with Sansa across his sheepshit-covered grass to his tower:

Lord Petyr made a face. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Ben wants no part of returning to the shit-filled sewers he was once forced to walk through to escape Meereen—

"Ben Plumm isn't going down in them sewers again, not for all the gold in the Seven Kingdoms." (ASOS Daenerys V)

—just as Petyr wants no part of a return to his shit-covered, shit-heated ancestral home beyond the fleeting bare minimum necessary to resume his lifelong escape from it:

"It is good to have you home, my lord," said one old man. … "How long will you be in residence?"
"As short a time as possible, Bryen, have no fear. Is the place habitable just now, would you say?"
"If we knew you was coming we would have laid down fresh rushes, m'lord," said the crone. "There's a dung fire burning." (ASOS Sansa VI)

Where Ben knows secret ways in and out of Meereen involving a slow-moving river and stagnant water—

"There must be some way into this city."
"I know a way." Brown Ben Plumm stroked his speckled grey-and-white beard. "Sewers." (ASOS Daenyers V)

—Littlefinger knows a secret exit from the Red Keep that opens onto a "muddy trail" (see: the content of sewers) by "the rushing water" of the Blackwater. (AGOT Eddard IV)
Notice that Ben "stroked his speckled grey-and-white beard" there. We also see him "scratch" his beard twice. Petyr is responsible for 8 of about 20 beard strokings in ASOIAF, and he, too, seems to have a two-tone beard:

He had a little pointed chin beard now, and threads of silver in his dark hair, though he was still shy of thirty. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

Amusement, Chuckles, Wisdom, More.

Ben's eyes regularly "crinkle… in amusement"—

His eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Daenerys V)
Brown Ben's eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Daenerys V)
[T]he wrinkles around Plumm's eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Littlefinger is young and thus his eyes do not "crinkle", but they do "glitter with" — and thus perhaps 'twinkle in' — "amusement":

Littlefinger's grey-green eyes glittered with amusement. (AGOT Eddard IV)

His eyes are also "full of" something like Ben's "amusement":

[Petyr] was studying her over his own goblet, his bright grey-green eyes full of . . . was it amusement? Or something else? Sansa was not certain. (ASOS Sansa VI)

That "full of" verbiage and the implication of "something else" 'seem' to get recursively recycled between the "amusement" in Ben's eyes, above, and Ben being "full of chuckles", which are like "amusement", but "something else":

Every man's favorite nuncle, full of chuckles and old sayings and roughspun wisdom. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Where Tyrion calls Plumm "Every man's favorite nuncle", he calls Littlefinger verbatim "everyone's friend". (ACOK Tyrion IV)
And Littlefinger is just as "full of chuckles and old sayings and roughspun wisdom" as Plumm:

"Brothels are a much sounder investment than ships, I've found. Whores seldom sink, and when they are boarded by pirates, why, the pirates pay good coin like everyone else." Lord Petyr chuckled at his own wit. (AGOT Eddard IX)
"Life is not a song, sweetling. You may learn that one day to your sorrow." -Littlefinger (AGOT Sansa III)
"Always keep your foes confused. If they are never certain who you are or what you want, they cannot know what you are like to do next. Sometimes the best way to baffle them is to make moves that have no purpose, or even seem to work against you. Remember that, Sansa, when you come to play the game." -Littlefinger (ASOS Sansa V)
"In the game of thrones, even the humblest pieces can have wills of their own. Sometimes they refuse to make the moves you've planned for them. Mark that well, Alayne. It's a lesson that Cersei Lannister still has yet to learn." -Littlefinger (AFFC Alayne I)

Getting On With One's Floppy Ears

Two of Petyr's bits of "roughspun wisdom" in particular—

Lord Petyr stifled a yawn. "When you find yourself in bed with an ugly woman, the best thing to do is close your eyes and get on with it," he declared. "Waiting won't make the maid any prettier. Kiss her and be done with it." (AGOT Eddard VIII)
"Most of [the smallfolk] believe that if a woman eats rabbit while pregnant, her child will be born with long floppy ears." - Petyr (ACOK Tyrion III)

—seem to be recursively recycled into one of Ben's (and into the maiden-esque outfit Dany dons as a result):

Brown Ben Plumm, the captain of the Second Sons, had put it more succinctly. "Man wants to be the king o' the rabbits, he best wear a pair o' floppy ears."
The floppy ears she chose today were made of sheer white linen, with a fringe of golden tassels. (ADWD Daenerys I)

Stories & Truth

Consider this passage, in which Petyr rebuts Sansa's implication that there is no truth "in songs and stories":

"Curses are only in songs and stories."
That seemed to amuse him. "Has someone made a song about Gregor Clegane dying of a poisoned spear thrust? Or about the sellsword before him, whose limbs Ser Gregor removed a joint at a time? That one took the castle from Ser Amory Lorch, who received it from Lord Tywin. A bear killed one, your dwarf the other. Lady Whent's died as well, I hear. Lothstons, Strongs, Harroways, Strongs . . . Harrenhal has withered every hand to touch it." (AFFC Alayne I)

Note the bolded language, as well as the theme of strange, improbable truths that defy the 'wisdom' of naive naysayers, and tell me the following passage — in which Tyrion confirms that there is truth to Ben's claim that he has "a drop of the dragon blood" — isn't a contrived, recursive reworking of the same basic themes and structure, anchored by the duplicated language:

[Tyrion:] "House Plumm is sworn to Casterly Rock, and as it happens I know a bit of its history. Your branch sprouted from a stone spit across the narrow sea, no doubt. A younger son of Viserys Plumm, I'd wager. The queen's dragons were fond of you, were they not?"
That seemed to amuse the sellsword. "Who told you that?"
"No one. Most of the stories you hear about dragons are fodder for fools. Talking dragons, dragons hoarding gold and gems, dragons with four legs and bellies big as elephants, dragons riddling with sphinxes … nonsense, all of it. But there are truths in the old books as well." (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Petyr & Scarb

Consider the story of Ben Plumm's friend "Scarb":

"His name is Oznak zo Pahl," Brown Ben Plumm told her when he arrived for the war council. He was the new commander of the Second Sons, chosen by a vote of his fellow sellswords. "I was bodyguard to his uncle once, before I joined the Second Sons. The Great Masters, what a ripe lot o' maggots. The women weren't so bad, though it was worth your life to look at the wrong one the wrong way. I knew a man, Scarb, this Oznak cut his liver out. Claimed to be defending a lady's honor, he did, said Scarb had raped her with his eyes. How do you rape a wench with eyes, I ask you? But his uncle is the richest man in Meereen and his father commands the city guard, so I had to run like a rat before he killed me too." (ASOS Daenerys V)

The story seems to be a 'rhyming', kaleidoscopic recursion of the story of Littlefinger's dealings with the wealthy and powerful Tullys, which saw Brandon almost kill Petyr for, essentially, looking at the wrong woman (Cat) the wrong way (i.e. as a bride rather than an older sister), only to "let him off with a scar" (as in Scarb and as in the scar the removal of an internal organ like a liver would leave) thanks to the pleading of Cat (it rhymes with "rat"). (AGOT Catelyn IV)
Where Ben "had to run like a rat" from Oznak and his father and uncle, Littlefinger was banished by Cat's father for fucking Lysa, which compares with Oznak's dubious claim of eye-"rape". Note also the way brutal, hot-blooded Oznak and his warrior father and rich uncle rework the trio of Hoster, the Blackfish, and Brandon.

Faithful/less Retainers

Ben presents himself as…

The faithful retainer, Tyrion decided. (ADWD Tyrion X)

This, too, seems 'rhymingly' recursive of Littlefinger being "one step up from a hedge knight" (hedge knights being quintessential retainers) and having "no army of retainers" (ACOK Tyrion IV) while presenting himself as something very like a 'faithful retainer', first to Jon Arryn, then to the crown. Where Tyrion (cynically) notes Plumm's faux faithfulness above, Tyrion's uncle (credulously) speaks of Littlefinger's supposed "loyalty":

"And there is this — Lord Petyr continues to demonstrate his loyalty." -Kevan Lannister (ASOS Tyrion III)

Then there is the fact that Petyr is pointedly faithless, both in the sense that he betrays people constantly (like Ben) but also in that the (heart tree-free) Eyrie has no septon of the Faith after he takes over—

Even the gods were silent. The Eyrie boasted a sept, but no septon; a godswood, but no heart tree. No prayers are answered here, she often thought, though some days she felt so lonely she had to try. (AFFC Alayne II)

—while he presents himself as Faithful:

"Your mother… died giving you birth, and entrusted you to the Faith. I have some devotional books you can look over. Learn to quote from them. Nothing discourages unwanted questions as much as a flow of pious bleating. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Counseling Councilers

Ben serves on Dany's "war council":

"His name is Oznak zo Pahl," Brown Ben Plumm told her when he arrived for the war council. (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger served on the small council, and played a key role in (seemingly) winning The War of the Five Kings.

Grey-X

Ben has "grey-white" hair, Littlefinger "grey-green" eyes. (ASOS Daenerys VI) To be clear: this is a textual/linguistic 'rhyme' whereby each has a feature called "grey-[color]" on the page, not an issue of in-world similarity.

Well Past Ripe

Ben speaks of bodies that are "Well past ripe":

"Best bring sacks as well as shovels, Worm," Brown Ben counseled. "Well past ripe, those ones. Falling off those poles in bits and pieces…" (ASOS Daenerys VI)

This blatantly prefigures the first line in our first Dornish POV, in which we see "well past ripe" blood oranges—

The blood oranges are well past ripe," the prince observed in a weary voice…. … It was true about the oranges. A few had fallen to burst open on the pale pink marble. (AFFC The Captain of Guards)

—that themselves recall . . . Littlefinger:

Lord Petyr cut the blood orange in two with his dagger and offered half to Sansa. … He tilted his chin back and squeezed the blood orange, so the juice ran down into his mouth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Doubly so as Doran's blood oranges are almost immediately paired with "gull's eggs"—

The prince was still not ready to depart. He had decided to break his fast before he went, with a blood orange and a plate of gull's eggs diced with bits of ham and fiery peppers. (AFFC The Captain of Guards)

—recalling the homecoming meal Littlefinger jokes eating about right before he actually eats the blood orange:

"Ah, cold salt mutton. I must be home. When I break my fast on gulls' eggs and seaweed soup, I'll be certain of it." (ASOS Sansa VI)

Marrying Their Young Charges

Ben's joke about marrying Dany—

"I heard talk Your Grace was going to take a husband," he said, "but no one told me it was me." (ADWD Daenerys V)

—'rhymes' with Petyr's scheming, per which he seems to be endeavoring to wed Sansa to Robert and then Harry the Heir, whereas it seems likely that he ultimately intends to wed her himself.

Refugee Policies

Ben has cruel but pragmatic policy advice as regards war refugees entering Meereen:

"Mouths on feet. And sick, you say?" Reznak wrung his hands. "Your Worship must not allow them in the city."
"I wouldn't," said Brown Ben Plumm. "I'm no maester, mind you, but I know you got to keep the bad apples from the good."
"These are not apples, Ben," said Dany. "These are men and women, sick and hungry and afraid." My children. "I should have gone to Astapor." (ADWD Daenerys V)

Petyr — wouldn't you know it? — effects a cruel but pragmatic policy as regards war refugees entering King's Landing:

"Lord Littlefinger… has imposed a tax on those wishing to enter the city."
"Yes, that would work," Tyrion said, thinking, Clever. Clever and cruel. Tens of thousands had fled the fighting for the supposed safety of King's Landing. He had seen them on the kingsroad, troupes of mothers and children and anxious fathers who had gazed on his horses and wagons with covetous eyes. Once they reached the city they would doubtless pay over all they had to put those high comforting walls between them and the war…. (ACOK Tyrion I)

Gold & Wagons

Ben is a shark for money, always looking to make a profit, as is clear in this passage in which Dany refuses his request to loose her dragons, which causes him to say they should leave Meereen with "wagons full o' gold and gems and such":

Dany sighed. "I am sorry, Ben. I dare not loose the dragons." She could see that was not the answer that he wanted.
Plumm scratched at his speckled whiskers. "If there's no dragons in the balance, well … we should leave before them Yunkish bastards close the trap … only first, make the slavers pay to see our backs. They pay the khals to leave their cities be, why not us? Sell Meereen back to them and start west with wagons full o' gold and gems and such." (ADWD Daenerys V)

The talk of dragons mashed up with wagons and hardnosed money-making and the fact that Brown Ben then switches sides (again, before likely doing so again in TWOW) seems mighty recursive of Littlefinger, especially here:

A master juggler was Petyr Baelish. … He did not simply collect the gold and lock it in a treasure vault, no. He paid the king's debts in promises, and put the king's gold to work. He bought wagons, shops, ships, houses. He bought grain when it was plentiful and sold bread when it was scarce. He bought wool from the north and linen from the south and lace from Lys, stored it, moved it, dyed it, sold it. The golden dragons bred and multiplied, and Littlefinger lent them out and brought them home with hatchlings. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Petyr & Kasporio

Ben's lieutenant in the Second Sons, Kasporio "the Cunning", is:

…slim and elegant, with a pointed beard, a bravo's blade, and a slashed pink doublet. (ADWD Tyrion XI)

He's thus superficially reminiscent of Littlefinger, who is clearly cunning, who is "slender" with a "pointed beard" like Kasporio, who has both an Essosi blade of his own and a "slashed doublet" like Kasporio's—

Lord Petyr sauntered into the solar as if nothing had gone amiss that morning. He wore a slashed velvet doublet in cream-and-silver, a grey silk cloak trimmed with black fox, and his customary mocking smile. (AGOT Eddard VIII)

—and who is called "elegant" like Kasporio in the very moment when he's dressed like he himself is a Plumm:

Lord Petyr was seated on his window seat, languid and elegant in a plush plum-colored doublet and a yellow satin cape, one gloved hand resting on his knee. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Plumm Colors & Plums

Note how the conversation that follows draws attention to the fact that Littlefinger is wearing Plumm colors without actually saying so:

"You look very elegant today, my lord."
"I'm wounded. I strive to look elegant every day."
"Is the doublet new?"
"It is. You're most observant."
"Plum and yellow. Are those the colors of your House?"
"No. But a man gets bored wearing the same colors day in and day out, or so I've found." (ACOK Tyrion IV)

That's not the only time time Littlefinger wears House Plumm's plum:

When the herald called, "Lord Petyr Baelish," he came forth dressed all in shades of rose and plum…. (ACOK Sansa VIII)

Besides dressing like a Plumm, Littlefinger on one occasion even seems to speak as if he's a Plumm with plums on the brain:

Littlefinger chuckled. "Ser Loras, if we send you off alone, Ser Gregor will send us back your head with a plum stuffed in that pretty mouth of yours." (AGOT Eddard XI)

This is perhaps appropriate, since Littlefinger is Lord of a "plum": Harrenhal.

Harrenhal was one of the richest plums in the Seven Kingdoms, its lands broad and rich and fertile, its great castle as formidable as any in the realm…. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Dany & Sansa

Ben Plumm infamously seems to turn his cloak against one of ASOIAF's protagonists, Dany, only to swing back to her side in TWOW. His actual loyalties are unclear.
Littlefinger infamously betrays AGOT's original protagonist, Ned, but then begins to "help" Sansa in ASOS. His actual intentions are unclear.
Ben plays at courtesy with Dany, bowing low and flattering her:

Dany found herself face-to-face with Brown Ben Plumm. He bowed low. "Worship. You look lovely. Well, you always did. None of them Yunkishmen are half so pretty. I thought I might bring a wedding gift for you, but the bidding went too high for old Brown Ben." (ADWD Daenerys VIII)

Littlefinger plays at courtesy with Sansa, bowing low and flattering her:

That was when Lord Baelish had said, "Oh, I don't know, Septa. Some of her lord father's decisions could do with a bit of questioning. The young lady is as wise as she is lovely." He made a sweeping bow to Sansa, so deep she was not quite sure if she was being complimented or mocked. (AGOT Sansa III)

Wedding Gifts & Games

Ben tries and fails to buy Tyrion at auction in order to deliver him to Daenerys "as a wedding gift".
Petyr buys the Tyrells with a wedding and delivers them and their swords to Joffrey.
While Ben plays cyvasse and Littlefinger "the game of thrones", Ben's tactics are similar to Littlefinger's, at least as they're sold to us:

"Plumm and I have played five games of cyvasse. Brown Ben is shrewd, tenacious, not unintelligent … but wary. He likes to let his opponent take the risks whilst he sits back and keeps his options open, reacting to the battle as it takes shape." (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Ben becomes "considerably impoverished" after playing cyvasse. (ADWD Tyrion X) Petyr's origins are, for a nobleman, considerably impoverished, but he becomes considerably enriched by playing the game of thrones.

Tybero & Littlefinger

Ben Plumm has a paymaster named Tybero Istarion who is usually called "Inkpots". He signs men up to Ben's free company and describes his duties twice:

"Keeping books, counting coin, writing contracts and letters." (ADWD Tyrion XII)
"I keep the books. I guard our gold. I draw up our agreements, collect our wages, make certain that we have sufficient coin to buy provisions. I do not decide who we fight or when." (TWOW Tyrion)

Petyr Baelish, who is usually called "Littlefinger", has surely used more ink and inkpots than anyone, first as Master of Coin, when he, much like Tybero, kept books, counted, collected and found gold to pay for the crown's demands, but did not decide who the crown would fight or when, all while filling a "labyrinth of… ledgers" and putting a slew of men on the crown's payroll—

He went back to work after she left, trying to track some golden dragons through the labyrinth of Littlefinger's ledgers. (ASOS Tyrion VI)
[Littlefinger] moved his own men into place. The Keepers of the Keys were his, all four. The King's Counter and the King's Scales were men he'd named. The officers in charge of all three mints. Harbormasters, tax farmers, customs sergeants, wool factors, toll collectors, pursers, wine factors; nine of every ten belonged to Littlefinger. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

—and lately as Lord Protector of Vale, when he writes "hundreds of letters", day and night:

Petyr Baelish… had written a hundred letters since Lady Lysa's fall. (AFFC Sansa I)

"Tybero Istarion" & "Petyr Baelish"

There's great resonance between the name "Tybero Istarion" and Petyr Baelish. "Tybero" evokes Tiburon, California. Tiburon is first of all a small peninsula on the north side of San Francisco Bay that is largely unincorporated and rural, which is "the site of ancient Native American rock carvings", (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiburon_Peninsula_(California)) all of which recalls Petyr's isolated little Finger, with its ancient chiseled boulder:

There was one place where… someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Tiburon means shark — Petyr is nothing if not a 'shark' in the financial sense — and it's also the name of a seaside town on the Tiburon peninsula that incorporates most of Angel Island, and "Istarion" evokes "Iscariot" as in the betrayer of Jesus Christ. Together, then, his names evoke something like a god-betraying angel, a la Lucifer, while "Petyr Baelish" sounds like a horny (satyr + peter as in penis) demon-ish sort, with Bael being a demon linked to another demon named Oriens, a name which in turn evokes the stellar constellation Orion, as the name "Istarion" evokes the stars. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bael_(demon))
To be sure, Ty-bero I-starion also evokes the Shakespeare characters Oberon and Prospero, mashing those names up with "star" [as in 'to star in a play'] and Ty-rion, who is a Caliban figure for certain (Caliban being Prospero's "monster"). Petyr, meanwhile seems very much like both a Prospero and an Oberon.
Bottom line: Ben Plumm's association with Inkpots AKA Tybero Istarion only enhances Ben's 'rhyme' with Petyr Baelish.

Sellswords Roots: Amiable & Perfectly Suited

Ben Plumm is a sellsword who…

…claimed to be part Braavosi… (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger claims to be the great-grandson of a sellsword "born in Braavos". (ASOS Sansa VI)
Where Ben Plumm is twice called…

…a creature of the free companies… (ASOS Daenerys V; ADWD Daenerys V)

…Littlefinger is likewise a verbatim "creature"—

"Lord Petyr, you are a wicked creature." (ACOK Tyrion III)

—who is 'of the free companies' in the sense that he claims descent from a Braavosi sellsword.
One of the sentences that calls Ben "a creature of the free companies" — i.e. a seemingly apt, perfectly suited sellsword — also calls him "an amiable mongrel". (ASOS Daenerys V)
Littlefinger is called "amiable… but too lowborn", as a "mongrel" surely is, by the same sentence that claims he has "no swords of his own", i.e. that he's bought no swords-for-sale, which seems to make him an apt, perfectly suited Hand:

Littlefinger was as amiable as he was clever, but too lowborn to threaten any of the great lords, with no swords of his own. The perfect Hand. (AFFC Jaime VII)

Where Ben of the free company "the Second Sons" is "an amiable mongrel" who plays at being gallant, Petyr employs 'the three sons' of Oswell Kettleblack, "amiable rogues" who "charm" Cersei as Ben charms Dany and who claim to have served in the free company "the Gallant Men":

The Kettleblacks would charm her, take her coin, and promise her anything she asked… Amiable rogues all three… (ACOK Tyrion IX)
"I rode with the Gallant Men. We fought for Lys, and some for Tyrosh." -Osmund Kettleblack (ASOS Jaime VIII)

Note: That Petyr does infact have "swords of his own" 'perjures' the line about him being "too lowborn", which is consistent with the hypothesis that his is in fact the blood of fallen kings.

Hidden Dangers

Ben points out that the hidden dangers of Meereen's gates make a direct attack on them far more dangerous than it at first appears:

"Did you see them bronze heads above the gates?" asked Brown Ben Plumm. "Rows of harpy heads with open mouths? The Meereenese can squirt boiling oil out them mouths, and cook your axemen where they stand." (ASOS Daenerys V)

Then he tells Dany how to avoid them (by attacking via the sewers).
And then he betrays Dany.
This is a 'rhyming' recursion of Petyr helpfully pointing out the hidden dangers lurking about the Red Keep to Ned—

Littlefinger winced. "My lord, step over here to the window, if you would be so kind."
… Frowning, Ned crossed to the window. Petyr Baelish made a casual gesture. "There, across the yard, at the door of the armory, do you see the boy squatting by the steps honing a sword with an oilstone?"
"What of him?"
"He reports to Varys. The Spider has taken a great interest in you and all your doings." He shifted in the window seat. "Now glance at the wall. Farther west, above the stables. The guardsman leaning on the ramparts?"
Ned saw the man. "Another of the eunuch's whisperers?"
"No, this one belongs to the queen. Notice that he enjoys a fine view of the door to this tower, the better to note who calls on you. There are others, many unknown even to me. The Red Keep is full of eyes. Why do you think I hid Cat in a brothel?"
Eddard Stark had no taste for these intrigues. "Seven hells," he swore. It did seem as though the man on the walls was watching him.

—before betraying him.
It's also worth noting that the defenses Ben points out are reminiscent of the Titan of Braavos, which is Petyr's ancestral sigil:

[S]he spied murder holes beneath the Titan's armored skirts, and pale faces staring down at them from behind the iron bars. (AFFC Arya I)

No Heroes

Ben wins command of the Second Sons, but it's not because he's some great hero:

[W]hen [Ben] took command of the Second Sons, he claimed to be the veteran of a hundred battles. "Though I will not say I fought bravely in all of them." (ASOS Daenerys V)

This is a 'rhyming' recursion of Sansa's thoughts about Petyr when Petyr is awarded 'command' of the Riverlands (wearing Plummy colors):

When the herald called, "Lord Petyr Baelish," he came forth dressed all in shades of rose and plum, his cloak patterned with mockingbirds. … Sansa had not heard of Littlefinger doing anything especially heroic during the battle, but it seemed he was to be rewarded all the same. (ACOK Sansa VIII)

Horses And Gold. (For Bribes, Of Course!)

When Dany sends Ben to scout for him, he demands supplies and horses, and extracts gold and gems from her for the purpose of bribing her enemies to change sides:

"We'll need provisions. Fresh horses too."
"Of course. Ser Barristan will see to it."
Brown Ben scratched his chin. "Might be we could get some o' them to come over. If Your Grace could spare a few bags o' gold and gems . . . just to give their captains a good taste, as it were . . . well, who knows?"
"Buy them, why not?" Dany said. That sort of thing went on all the time amongst the free companies of the Disputed Lands, she knew. "Yes, very good. Reznak, see to it." (ADWD Daenerys V)

This is entirely recursive of the conversation Petyr has when he volunteers to ride to Bitterbridge to try to bribe and otherwise persuade the Tyrells and Renly's other former bannermen to change sides:

"There is a chance here, it seems to me. Win Loras Tyrell to our cause and Lord Mace Tyrell and his bannermen might join us as well. … Perhaps we can give them good and sufficient reasons to prefer Joffrey to Stannis…."
"What sort of reasons do you mean to give them?"
"Gold reasons," Littlefinger suggested at once. …
"Bribes might sway some of the lesser lords," Tyrion said, "but never Highgarden." …
"True," Littlefinger admitted. "The Knight of Flowers is the key there. Mace Tyrell has two older sons, but Loras has always been his favorite. Win him, and Highgarden will be yours." …
Littlefinger was not done. "We'll want horses. Swift and strong. The fighting will make remounts hard to come by. A goodly supply of gold will also be needed, for those gifts we spoke of earlier."
"Take as much as you require. If the city falls, Stannis will steal it all anyway."

(Note the way Ben's "provisions" and "gold" are recursive of Littlefinger's "supply of gold".)

Unsuspected & Undespised

Dany never dreamed Ben would betray her:

"I never thought Brown Ben. Even my dragons seemed to trust him." (ADWD Daenerys VI)

Cersei still doesn't begin to suspect that Littlefinger betrayed her by orchestrating Joffrey's murder:

"We shall have need of a new lord treasurer. If the Vale were not so unsettled, I would bring back Petyr Baelish…." - Cersei (AFFC Cersei IX)

Even though Ben betrays Dany, she doesn't want Daario to bring her his head:

[Daario:] "I will bring you back the head of Brown Ben Plumm for a wedding gift."
"No heads," Dany insisted. (ADWD Daenerys VII)

This reworks Cersei insisting that Petyr not be harmed after he (unbeknownst to her) had her son murdered:

"Maester Pycelle, instruct these Lords Declarant that no harm must come to Petyr." -Cersei (AFFC Cersei IV)

Employers of Drunks And Fakes

Brown Ben employs a smith who (a) has a drinking problem such that (b) Kem doesn't consider him a "real armorer":

The smith, this fabled Hammer, proved to be a freakish-looking hulk with a left arm that appeared twice as thick as his right. "He's drunk more than not," Kem said. "Brown Ben lets it go, but one day we'll get us a real armorer." (ADWD Tyrion XII)

At the Eyrie, Petyr employs Lothor Brune as his captain of the guards. It's subtle, but it's employed he has problems when he drinks (if not a drinking problem):

Sober, [Brune] was a quiet man, but a strong one. (AFFC Alayne II)

On the Fingers, Petyr's "captain of the guard" is clearly no one's idea of a real captain of the guard, both because he's 80 and because he's the only guard:

"It is good to have you home, my lord," said one old man. He looked to be at least eighty, but he wore a studded brigantine and a longsword at his side. "How long will you be in residence?"
"As short a time as possible, Bryen, have no fear." … "Bryen—didn't I name you captain of the guard the last time I was here?"
"You did, my lord. You said you'd be getting some more men too, but you never did. Me and the dogs stand all the watches." (ASOS Sansa VI)

The Fucking Of A Lifetime

Ben gives Tyrion the fucking of his life:

"Your cock is as big as in the stories," [Tyrion] said. "Consider me well and truly fucked, Lord Plumm." (ADWD Tyrion XII)

Petyr gives Lysa the fucking of hers:

"Petyr," her aunt moaned. "Oh, Petyr, Petyr, sweet Petyr, oh oh oh. There, Petyr, there. That's where you belong." Lady Lysa's singer launched into a bawdy version of "Milady's Supper," but even his singing and playing could not drown out Lysa's cries. "Make me a baby, Petyr," she screamed, "make me another sweet little baby. Oh, Petyr, my precious, my precious, PEEEEEETYR!" Her last shriek was so loud that it set the dogs to barking, and two of her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

So where Petyr gives Lysa an orgasm that "set[s] the dogs to barking", which causes laughter ("her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth", and where Petyr's "lies" turn to flying bugs coming out of his mouth—

When [Littlefinger] opened his mouth to speak, his lies turned to pale grey moths and took wing. (AGOT Eddard XV)

—Ben "[gives] a bark of laughter" and swallows a fly:

Ben Plumm gave a bark of laughter. "There were flies in my ale this morning. I swallowed one of them." (ASOS Daenrys VI)

Note the rhyme within the rhyme: Littlefinger lies → Ben's flies.
There's just no way that Ben Plumm passage isn't contrived with Littlefinger in mind.

CONCLUDED IN OLDEST REPLY, BELOW & HERE

Petyr & The Plumms

I want to talk about the deep, strong 'rhyme' that exists between Littlefinger and the Plumms, including most prominently Brown Ben Plumm.
Before I talk about Brown Ben, though, let's talk about Petyr and Peter and Peter. And Dennis.

Petyrs & Peters & Littlefingers & Plum(m)s

Littlefinger's given name is, of course, Petyr.
It so happens that there is a Petyr Plumm in The Hedge Knight graphic novel. This is most curious, since the comic adaptations are otherwise entirely about cutting, not adding, information.
Comics aside, it so happens that House Plumm also boasts a Peter Plumm. (ASOS Appenix & AFFC Appendix)
"Peter" is a penis joke of a name, although not so much as "Petyr Littlefinger".
Reviewing, "Petyr" is a mash-up of (a) "Peter", which [means penis], and (b) the ever-horny and always-erect [Satyrs] of myth.
Meanwhile "Littlefinger" is a small penis joke that's called out as such three times in the text:

"Alayne is the Lord Protector's natural daughter," he told his cousin gruffly.
"Littlefinger's little finger has been busy," said Lyn Corbray, with a wicked smile. Belmore laughed, and Alayne could feel the color rising in her cheeks. (AFFC Alayne I)
Who could be a better husband than our own bold Lord Protector? Though I do wish he had a better name than Littlefinger. How little is it, do you know?"
"His finger?" She blushed again. "I don't . . . I never . . ." (AFFC Alayne II)
"I'd sooner marry Lord Petyr. Then I'd be your mother. How little is his finger, I ask you?"
Alayne did not dignify that question with an answer. (TWOW Alayne I)

(Catelyn's belief that Edmure named Petyr "Littlefinger" because he was small and from the smallest Finger—

Her brother Edmure had given him that name, long ago at Riverrun. His family's modest holdings were on the smallest of the Fingers, and Petyr had been slight and short for his age. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

—is a paradigmatic example of unreliable narrator: The boys weren't gonna tell the naive young lady what was really meant. [Even if you for whatever reason need to believe Cat's explanation is the (innocent) truth, it remains that "Littlefinger" is used as a penis joke, in-world.])
So it's 'interesting', that "Peter Plumm" is paired in the appendices of ASOS and AFFC with a brother, "Dennis", since Peter + Dennis = Penis. Plus they're the Plumms, whereas "plums" is slang for testacles. (https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=plums)
For what it's worth, by the way, Peter and Dennis Plumm are Littlefinger's physical opposite. Pointedly so, as if yin and yang:

[Peter and Dennis Plumm] were big, fleshy fellows with thick necks…

"Big and fleshy"? Littlefinger's "small" and "slight".
"Thick necks?" Littlefinger is "slender", and he employs Maester Colemon, whose defining physical characteristic is his "ridiculously long and skinny neck". (AFFC Alayne II)
(As to what else might be "big" and "fleshy" with a "thick neck"… see again "Peter" + "Dennis".)

Ben Plumm

When most readers think of the Plumms, though, they naturally think of Brown Ben Plumm. A great many details about Ben seem contrived so as to 'rhyme' him with Littlefinger. We may as well start with the obvious fact that penises are at the center of both men's stories.

Ben Plumm & The Six Foot Cock

Where "Petyr Littlefinger" is a double penis joke, about a small penis no less, Ben Plumm tells Dany all about his ancestor with a giant dick:

This old Plumm was a lord, though, must have been a famous fellow in his day, the talk of all the land. The thing was, begging your royal pardon, he had himself a cock six foot long."
The three bells in Dany's braid tinkled when she laughed. "You mean inches, I think."
"Feet," Brown Ben said firmly. "If it was inches, who'd want to talk about it, now? Your Grace."
Dany giggled like a little girl. "Did your grandmother claim she'd actually seen this prodigy?"
"That the old crone never did." (ASOS Daenerys V)

The thing is, while Edmure may have joked about the size of Petyr's "Littlefinger", all evidence suggests he'd be less shamed by "old Plumm's" six foot cock than most:

"Petyr," her aunt moaned. "Oh, Petyr, Petyr, sweet Petyr, oh oh oh. There, Petyr, there. That's where you belong." Lady Lysa's singer launched into a bawdy version of "Milady's Supper," but even his singing and playing could not drown out Lysa's cries. "Make me a baby, Petyr," she screamed, "make me another sweet little baby. Oh, Petyr, my precious, my precious, PEEEEEETYR!" Her last shriek was so loud that it set the dogs to barking, and two of her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Prodigies

While Dany uses the odd term "prodigy" to refer to Ben's ancestor with the great schlong, Littlefinger-the-walking-penis-joke was himself a literal [prodigy], rising on merit in his teens and early 20s from nothing to Master of Coin:

Ten years ago, Jon Arryn had given him a minor sinecure in customs… Littlefinger's rise had been arrow-swift. Within three years of his coming to court, he was master of coin and a member of the small council… (ACOK Tyrion IV)
Petyr… had a little pointed chin beard now, and threads of silver in his dark hair, though he was still shy of thirty. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

Old Crones

Ben Plumm calls his grandmother an "old crone", a term that can be defined as a "witch" or "witchlike old women". (https://thefreedictionary.com/crone)
Littlefinger is Lord of Harrenhal. His noble forebears there include the witchy Mad Danelle Lothston and the witchy Alys Rivers, and Harrenhal is perhaps the setting of Jenny's Song — named for the witchy Jenny of Oldstones and a favorite of the Ghost of High Heart, a "woods witch" and "old" "crone" — given its lyrics about a high hall of kings who are gone—

High in the halls of the kings who are gone, Jenny would dance with her ghosts

—and the Ghost referring to Harrenhal as "the hall of kings"—

"In the hall of kings, the goat sits alone and fevered as the great dog descends on him." (ASOS Arya VIII)

—and this:

Lady Whent, last of her line, who dwelt with her ghosts in the cavernous vaults of Harrenhal; (AGOT Catelyn V)

Smiling. Amiable.

Ben:

Plumm had an amiable look to him, especially when he smiled. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

A… smiling, genial man… (ACOK Tyrion IV)
A moment later Lord Baelish entered through the tall doors in the rear, smiling. He chatted amiably with Ser Balon and Ser Dontos as he made his way to the front. (AGOT Sansa V)

All Sham

Ben:

It was all sham. Those smiles never touched Plumm's eyes… (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

He had grey-green eyes that did not smile when his mouth did. (AGOT Sansa II)
Littlefinger smiled with his mouth, but not his eyes. (AFFC Alayne I)
"Oh, I think you do," said Littlefinger, with one of those smiles that did not reach his eyes. (TWOW Alayne I)

Cautious Greed

Ben:

[G]reed hid behind a veil of caution. Hungry, but wary, this one. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Littlefinger:

Littlefinger looked like a boy who had just taken a furtive bite from a honeycomb. He was trying to watch for bees, but the honey was so sweet. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Sheepshit & Sewers

Ben, while thinking about walking through the shit-filled sewers of Meereen:

Brown Ben made a face. (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger, mere seconds before he walks with Sansa across his sheepshit-covered grass to his tower:

Lord Petyr made a face. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Ben wants no part of returning to the shit-filled sewers he was once forced to walk through to escape Meereen—

"Ben Plumm isn't going down in them sewers again, not for all the gold in the Seven Kingdoms." (ASOS Daenerys V)

—just as Petyr wants no part of a return to his shit-covered, shit-heated ancestral home beyond the fleeting bare minimum necessary to resume his lifelong escape from it:

"It is good to have you home, my lord," said one old man. … "How long will you be in residence?"
"As short a time as possible, Bryen, have no fear. Is the place habitable just now, would you say?"
"If we knew you was coming we would have laid down fresh rushes, m'lord," said the crone. "There's a dung fire burning." (ASOS Sansa VI)

Where Ben knows secret ways in and out of Meereen involving a slow-moving river and stagnant water—

"There must be some way into this city."
"I know a way." Brown Ben Plumm stroked his speckled grey-and-white beard. "Sewers." (ASOS Daenyers V)

—Littlefinger knows a secret exit from the Red Keep that opens onto a "muddy trail" (see: the content of sewers) by "the rushing water" of the Blackwater. (AGOT Eddard IV)
Notice that Ben "stroked his speckled grey-and-white beard" there. We also see him "scratch" his beard twice. Petyr is responsible for 8 of about 20 beard strokings in ASOIAF, and he, too, seems to have a two-tone beard:

He had a little pointed chin beard now, and threads of silver in his dark hair, though he was still shy of thirty. (AGOT Catelyn IV)

Amusement, Chuckles, Wisdom, More.

Ben's eyes regularly "crinkle… in amusement"—

His eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Daenerys V)
Brown Ben's eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Daenerys V)
[T]he wrinkles around Plumm's eyes crinkled in amusement. (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Littlefinger is young and thus his eyes do not "crinkle", but they do "glitter with" — and thus perhaps 'twinkle in' — "amusement":

Littlefinger's grey-green eyes glittered with amusement. (AGOT Eddard IV)

His eyes are also "full of" something like Ben's "amusement":

[Petyr] was studying her over his own goblet, his bright grey-green eyes full of . . . was it amusement? Or something else? Sansa was not certain. (ASOS Sansa VI)

That "full of" verbiage and the implication of "something else" 'seem' to get recursively recycled between the "amusement" in Ben's eyes, above, and Ben being "full of chuckles", which are like "amusement", but "something else":

Every man's favorite nuncle, full of chuckles and old sayings and roughspun wisdom. (ADWD Tyrion X)

Where Tyrion calls Plumm "Every man's favorite nuncle", he calls Littlefinger verbatim "everyone's friend". (ACOK Tyrion IV)
And Littlefinger is just as "full of chuckles and old sayings and roughspun wisdom" as Plumm:

"Brothels are a much sounder investment than ships, I've found. Whores seldom sink, and when they are boarded by pirates, why, the pirates pay good coin like everyone else." Lord Petyr chuckled at his own wit. (AGOT Eddard IX)
"Life is not a song, sweetling. You may learn that one day to your sorrow." -Littlefinger (AGOT Sansa III)
"Always keep your foes confused. If they are never certain who you are or what you want, they cannot know what you are like to do next. Sometimes the best way to baffle them is to make moves that have no purpose, or even seem to work against you. Remember that, Sansa, when you come to play the game." -Littlefinger (ASOS Sansa V)
"In the game of thrones, even the humblest pieces can have wills of their own. Sometimes they refuse to make the moves you've planned for them. Mark that well, Alayne. It's a lesson that Cersei Lannister still has yet to learn." -Littlefinger (AFFC Alayne I)

Getting On With One's Floppy Ears

Two of Petyr's bits of "roughspun wisdom" in particular—

Lord Petyr stifled a yawn. "When you find yourself in bed with an ugly woman, the best thing to do is close your eyes and get on with it," he declared. "Waiting won't make the maid any prettier. Kiss her and be done with it." (AGOT Eddard VIII)
"Most of [the smallfolk] believe that if a woman eats rabbit while pregnant, her child will be born with long floppy ears." - Petyr (ACOK Tyrion III)

—seem to be recursively recycled into one of Ben's (and into the maiden-esque outfit Dany dons as a result):

Brown Ben Plumm, the captain of the Second Sons, had put it more succinctly. "Man wants to be the king o' the rabbits, he best wear a pair o' floppy ears."
The floppy ears she chose today were made of sheer white linen, with a fringe of golden tassels. (ADWD Daenerys I)

Stories & Truth

Consider this passage, in which Petyr rebuts Sansa's implication that there is no truth "in songs and stories":

"Curses are only in songs and stories."
That seemed to amuse him. "Has someone made a song about Gregor Clegane dying of a poisoned spear thrust? Or about the sellsword before him, whose limbs Ser Gregor removed a joint at a time? That one took the castle from Ser Amory Lorch, who received it from Lord Tywin. A bear killed one, your dwarf the other. Lady Whent's died as well, I hear. Lothstons, Strongs, Harroways, Strongs . . . Harrenhal has withered every hand to touch it." (AFFC Alayne I)

Note the bolded language, as well as the theme of strange, improbable truths that defy the 'wisdom' of naive naysayers, and tell me the following passage — in which Tyrion confirms that there is truth to Ben's claim that he has "a drop of the dragon blood" — isn't a contrived, recursive reworking of the same basic themes and structure, anchored by the duplicated language:

[Tyrion:] "House Plumm is sworn to Casterly Rock, and as it happens I know a bit of its history. Your branch sprouted from a stone spit across the narrow sea, no doubt. A younger son of Viserys Plumm, I'd wager. The queen's dragons were fond of you, were they not?"
That seemed to amuse the sellsword. "Who told you that?"
"No one. Most of the stories you hear about dragons are fodder for fools. Talking dragons, dragons hoarding gold and gems, dragons with four legs and bellies big as elephants, dragons riddling with sphinxes … nonsense, all of it. But there are truths in the old books as well." (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Petyr & Scarb

Consider the story of Ben Plumm's friend "Scarb":

"His name is Oznak zo Pahl," Brown Ben Plumm told her when he arrived for the war council. He was the new commander of the Second Sons, chosen by a vote of his fellow sellswords. "I was bodyguard to his uncle once, before I joined the Second Sons. The Great Masters, what a ripe lot o' maggots. The women weren't so bad, though it was worth your life to look at the wrong one the wrong way. I knew a man, Scarb, this Oznak cut his liver out. Claimed to be defending a lady's honor, he did, said Scarb had raped her with his eyes. How do you rape a wench with eyes, I ask you? But his uncle is the richest man in Meereen and his father commands the city guard, so I had to run like a rat before he killed me too." (ASOS Daenerys V)

The story seems to be a 'rhyming', kaleidoscopic recursion of the story of Littlefinger's dealings with the wealthy and powerful Tullys, which saw Brandon almost kill Petyr for, essentially, looking at the wrong woman (Cat) the wrong way (i.e. as a bride rather than an older sister), only to "let him off with a scar" (as in Scarb and as in the scar the removal of an internal organ like a liver would leave) thanks to the pleading of Cat (it rhymes with "rat"). (AGOT Catelyn IV)
Where Ben "had to run like a rat" from Oznak and his father and uncle, Littlefinger was banished by Cat's father for fucking Lysa, which compares with Oznak's dubious claim of eye-"rape". Note also the way brutal, hot-blooded Oznak and his warrior father and rich uncle rework the trio of Hoster, the Blackfish, and Brandon.

Faithful/less Retainers

Ben presents himself as…

The faithful retainer, Tyrion decided. (ADWD Tyrion X)

This, too, seems 'rhymingly' recursive of Littlefinger being "one step up from a hedge knight" (hedge knights being quintessential retainers) and having "no army of retainers" (ACOK Tyrion IV) while presenting himself as something very like a 'faithful retainer', first to Jon Arryn, then to the crown. Where Tyrion (cynically) notes Plumm's faux faithfulness above, Tyrion's uncle (credulously) speaks of Littlefinger's supposed "loyalty":

"And there is this — Lord Petyr continues to demonstrate his loyalty." -Kevan Lannister (ASOS Tyrion III)

Then there is the fact that Petyr is pointedly faithless, both in the sense that he betrays people constantly (like Ben) but also in that the (heart tree-free) Eyrie has no septon of the Faith after he takes over—

Even the gods were silent. The Eyrie boasted a sept, but no septon; a godswood, but no heart tree. No prayers are answered here, she often thought, though some days she felt so lonely she had to try. (AFFC Alayne II)

—while he presents himself as Faithful:

"Your mother… died giving you birth, and entrusted you to the Faith. I have some devotional books you can look over. Learn to quote from them. Nothing discourages unwanted questions as much as a flow of pious bleating. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Counseling Councilers

Ben serves on Dany's "war council":

"His name is Oznak zo Pahl," Brown Ben Plumm told her when he arrived for the war council. (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger served on the small council, and played a key role in (seemingly) winning The War of the Five Kings.

Grey-X

Ben has "grey-white" hair, Littlefinger "grey-green" eyes. (ASOS Daenerys VI) To be clear: this is a textual/linguistic 'rhyme' whereby each has a feature called "grey-[color]" on the page, not an issue of in-world similarity.

Well Past Ripe

Ben speaks of bodies that are "Well past ripe":

"Best bring sacks as well as shovels, Worm," Brown Ben counseled. "Well past ripe, those ones. Falling off those poles in bits and pieces…" (ASOS Daenerys VI)

This blatantly prefigures the first line in our first Dornish POV, in which we see "well past ripe" blood oranges—

The blood oranges are well past ripe," the prince observed in a weary voice…. … It was true about the oranges. A few had fallen to burst open on the pale pink marble. (AFFC The Captain of Guards)

—that themselves recall . . . Littlefinger:

Lord Petyr cut the blood orange in two with his dagger and offered half to Sansa. … He tilted his chin back and squeezed the blood orange, so the juice ran down into his mouth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Doubly so as Doran's blood oranges are almost immediately paired with "gull's eggs"—

The prince was still not ready to depart. He had decided to break his fast before he went, with a blood orange and a plate of gull's eggs diced with bits of ham and fiery peppers. (AFFC The Captain of Guards)

—recalling the homecoming meal Littlefinger jokes eating about right before he actually eats the blood orange:

"Ah, cold salt mutton. I must be home. When I break my fast on gulls' eggs and seaweed soup, I'll be certain of it." (ASOS Sansa VI)

Marrying Their Young Charges

Ben's joke about marrying Dany—

"I heard talk Your Grace was going to take a husband," he said, "but no one told me it was me." (ADWD Daenerys V)

—'rhymes' with Petyr's scheming, per which he seems to be endeavoring to wed Sansa to Robert and then Harry the Heir, whereas it seems likely that he ultimately intends to wed her himself.

Refugee Policies

Ben has cruel but pragmatic policy advice as regards war refugees entering Meereen:

"Mouths on feet. And sick, you say?" Reznak wrung his hands. "Your Worship must not allow them in the city."
"I wouldn't," said Brown Ben Plumm. "I'm no maester, mind you, but I know you got to keep the bad apples from the good."
"These are not apples, Ben," said Dany. "These are men and women, sick and hungry and afraid." My children. "I should have gone to Astapor." (ADWD Daenerys V)

Petyr — wouldn't you know it? — effects a cruel but pragmatic policy as regards war refugees entering King's Landing:

"Lord Littlefinger… has imposed a tax on those wishing to enter the city."
"Yes, that would work," Tyrion said, thinking, Clever. Clever and cruel. Tens of thousands had fled the fighting for the supposed safety of King's Landing. He had seen them on the kingsroad, troupes of mothers and children and anxious fathers who had gazed on his horses and wagons with covetous eyes. Once they reached the city they would doubtless pay over all they had to put those high comforting walls between them and the war…. (ACOK Tyrion I)

Gold & Wagons

Ben is a shark for money, always looking to make a profit, as is clear in this passage in which Dany refuses his request to loose her dragons, which causes him to say they should leave Meereen with "wagons full o' gold and gems and such":

Dany sighed. "I am sorry, Ben. I dare not loose the dragons." She could see that was not the answer that he wanted.
Plumm scratched at his speckled whiskers. "If there's no dragons in the balance, well … we should leave before them Yunkish bastards close the trap … only first, make the slavers pay to see our backs. They pay the khals to leave their cities be, why not us? Sell Meereen back to them and start west with wagons full o' gold and gems and such." (ADWD Daenerys V)

The talk of dragons mashed up with wagons and hardnosed money-making and the fact that Brown Ben then switches sides (again, before likely doing so again in TWOW) seems mighty recursive of Littlefinger, especially here:

A master juggler was Petyr Baelish. … He did not simply collect the gold and lock it in a treasure vault, no. He paid the king's debts in promises, and put the king's gold to work. He bought wagons, shops, ships, houses. He bought grain when it was plentiful and sold bread when it was scarce. He bought wool from the north and linen from the south and lace from Lys, stored it, moved it, dyed it, sold it. The golden dragons bred and multiplied, and Littlefinger lent them out and brought them home with hatchlings. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Petyr & Kasporio

Ben's lieutenant in the Second Sons, Kasporio "the Cunning", is:

…slim and elegant, with a pointed beard, a bravo's blade, and a slashed pink doublet. (ADWD Tyrion XI)

He's thus superficially reminiscent of Littlefinger, who is clearly cunning, who is "slender" with a "pointed beard" like Kasporio, who has both an Essosi blade of his own and a "slashed doublet" like Kasporio's—

Lord Petyr sauntered into the solar as if nothing had gone amiss that morning. He wore a slashed velvet doublet in cream-and-silver, a grey silk cloak trimmed with black fox, and his customary mocking smile. (AGOT Eddard VIII)

—and who is called "elegant" like Kasporio in the very moment when he's dressed like he himself is a Plumm:

Lord Petyr was seated on his window seat, languid and elegant in a plush plum-colored doublet and a yellow satin cape, one gloved hand resting on his knee. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Plumm Colors & Plums

Note how the conversation that follows draws attention to the fact that Littlefinger is wearing Plumm colors without actually saying so:

"You look very elegant today, my lord."
"I'm wounded. I strive to look elegant every day."
"Is the doublet new?"
"It is. You're most observant."
"Plum and yellow. Are those the colors of your House?"
"No. But a man gets bored wearing the same colors day in and day out, or so I've found." (ACOK Tyrion IV)

That's not the only time time Littlefinger wears House Plumm's plum:

When the herald called, "Lord Petyr Baelish," he came forth dressed all in shades of rose and plum…. (ACOK Sansa VIII)

Besides dressing like a Plumm, Littlefinger on one occasion even seems to speak as if he's a Plumm with plums on the brain:

Littlefinger chuckled. "Ser Loras, if we send you off alone, Ser Gregor will send us back your head with a plum stuffed in that pretty mouth of yours." (AGOT Eddard XI)

This is perhaps appropriate, since Littlefinger is Lord of a "plum": Harrenhal.

Harrenhal was one of the richest plums in the Seven Kingdoms, its lands broad and rich and fertile, its great castle as formidable as any in the realm…. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

Dany & Sansa

Ben Plumm infamously seems to turn his cloak against one of ASOIAF's protagonists, Dany, only to swing back to her side in TWOW. His actual loyalties are unclear.
Littlefinger infamously betrays AGOT's original protagonist, Ned, but then begins to "help" Sansa in ASOS. His actual intentions are unclear.
Ben plays at courtesy with Dany, bowing low and flattering her:

Dany found herself face-to-face with Brown Ben Plumm. He bowed low. "Worship. You look lovely. Well, you always did. None of them Yunkishmen are half so pretty. I thought I might bring a wedding gift for you, but the bidding went too high for old Brown Ben." (ADWD Daenerys VIII)

Littlefinger plays at courtesy with Sansa, bowing low and flattering her:

That was when Lord Baelish had said, "Oh, I don't know, Septa. Some of her lord father's decisions could do with a bit of questioning. The young lady is as wise as she is lovely." He made a sweeping bow to Sansa, so deep she was not quite sure if she was being complimented or mocked. (AGOT Sansa III)

Wedding Gifts & Games

Ben tries and fails to buy Tyrion at auction in order to deliver him to Daenerys "as a wedding gift".
Petyr buys the Tyrells with a wedding and delivers them and their swords to Joffrey.
While Ben plays cyvasse and Littlefinger "the game of thrones", Ben's tactics are similar to Littlefinger's, at least as they're sold to us:

"Plumm and I have played five games of cyvasse. Brown Ben is shrewd, tenacious, not unintelligent … but wary. He likes to let his opponent take the risks whilst he sits back and keeps his options open, reacting to the battle as it takes shape." (ADWD Tyrion XI)

Ben becomes "considerably impoverished" after playing cyvasse. (ADWD Tyrion X) Petyr's origins are, for a nobleman, considerably impoverished, but he becomes considerably enriched by playing the game of thrones.

Tybero & Littlefinger

Ben Plumm has a paymaster named Tybero Istarion who is usually called "Inkpots". He signs men up to Ben's free company and describes his duties twice:

"Keeping books, counting coin, writing contracts and letters." (ADWD Tyrion XII)
"I keep the books. I guard our gold. I draw up our agreements, collect our wages, make certain that we have sufficient coin to buy provisions. I do not decide who we fight or when." (TWOW Tyrion)

Petyr Baelish, who is usually called "Littlefinger", has surely used more ink and inkpots than anyone, first as Master of Coin, when he, much like Tybero, kept books, counted, collected and found gold to pay for the crown's demands, but did not decide who the crown would fight or when, all while filling a "labyrinth of… ledgers" and putting a slew of men on the crown's payroll—

He went back to work after she left, trying to track some golden dragons through the labyrinth of Littlefinger's ledgers. (ASOS Tyrion VI)
[Littlefinger] moved his own men into place. The Keepers of the Keys were his, all four. The King's Counter and the King's Scales were men he'd named. The officers in charge of all three mints. Harbormasters, tax farmers, customs sergeants, wool factors, toll collectors, pursers, wine factors; nine of every ten belonged to Littlefinger. (ACOK Tyrion IV)

—and lately as Lord Protector of Vale, when he writes "hundreds of letters", day and night:

Petyr Baelish… had written a hundred letters since Lady Lysa's fall. (AFFC Sansa I)

"Tybero Istarion" & "Petyr Baelish"

There's great resonance between the name "Tybero Istarion" and Petyr Baelish. "Tybero" evokes Tiburon, California. Tiburon is first of all a small peninsula on the north side of San Francisco Bay that is largely unincorporated and rural, which is "the site of ancient Native American rock carvings", (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiburon_Peninsula_(California)) all of which recalls Petyr's isolated little Finger, with its ancient chiseled boulder:

There was one place where… someone had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder. Petyr said that marked one of the places the Andals had landed, when they came across the sea to wrest the Vale from the First Men. (ASOS Sansa VI)

Tiburon means shark — Petyr is nothing if not a 'shark' in the financial sense — and it's also the name of a seaside town on the Tiburon peninsula that incorporates most of Angel Island, and "Istarion" evokes "Iscariot" as in the betrayer of Jesus Christ. Together, then, his names evoke something like a god-betraying angel, a la Lucifer, while "Petyr Baelish" sounds like a horny (satyr + peter as in penis) demon-ish sort, with Bael being a demon linked to another demon named Oriens, a name which in turn evokes the stellar constellation Orion, as the name "Istarion" evokes the stars. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bael_(demon))
To be sure, Ty-bero I-starion also evokes the Shakespeare characters Oberon and Prospero, mashing those names up with "star" [as in 'to star in a play'] and Ty-rion, who is a Caliban figure for certain (Caliban being Prospero's "monster"). Petyr, meanwhile seems very much like both a Prospero and an Oberon.
Bottom line: Ben Plumm's association with Inkpots AKA Tybero Istarion only enhances Ben's 'rhyme' with Petyr Baelish.

Sellswords Roots: Amiable & Perfectly Suited

Ben Plumm is a sellsword who…

…claimed to be part Braavosi… (ASOS Daenerys V)

Littlefinger claims to be the great-grandson of a sellsword "born in Braavos". (ASOS Sansa VI)
Where Ben Plumm is twice called…

…a creature of the free companies… (ASOS Daenerys V; ADWD Daenerys V)

…Littlefinger is likewise a verbatim "creature"—

"Lord Petyr, you are a wicked creature." (ACOK Tyrion III)

—who is 'of the free companies' in the sense that he claims descent from a Braavosi sellsword.
One of the sentences that calls Ben "a creature of the free companies" — i.e. a seemingly apt, perfectly suited sellsword — also calls him "an amiable mongrel". (ASOS Daenerys V)
Littlefinger is called "amiable… but too lowborn", as a "mongrel" surely is, by the same sentence that claims he has "no swords of his own", i.e. that he's bought no swords-for-sale, which seems to make him an apt, perfectly suited Hand:

Littlefinger was as amiable as he was clever, but too lowborn to threaten any of the great lords, with no swords of his own. The perfect Hand. (AFFC Jaime VII)

Where Ben of the free company "the Second Sons" is "an amiable mongrel" who plays at being gallant, Petyr employs 'the three sons' of Oswell Kettleblack, "amiable rogues" who "charm" Cersei as Ben charms Dany and who claim to have served in the free company "the Gallant Men":

The Kettleblacks would charm her, take her coin, and promise her anything she asked… Amiable rogues all three… (ACOK Tyrion IX)
"I rode with the Gallant Men. We fought for Lys, and some for Tyrosh." -Osmund Kettleblack (ASOS Jaime VIII)

Note: That Petyr does infact have "swords of his own" 'perjures' the line about him being "too lowborn", which is consistent with the hypothesis that his is in fact the blood of fallen kings.

Hidden Dangers

Ben points out that the hidden dangers of Meereen's gates make a direct attack on them far more dangerous than it at first appears:

"Did you see them bronze heads above the gates?" asked Brown Ben Plumm. "Rows of harpy heads with open mouths? The Meereenese can squirt boiling oil out them mouths, and cook your axemen where they stand." (ASOS Daenerys V)

Then he tells Dany how to avoid them (by attacking via the sewers).
And then he betrays Dany.
This is a 'rhyming' recursion of Petyr helpfully pointing out the hidden dangers lurking about the Red Keep to Ned—

Littlefinger winced. "My lord, step over here to the window, if you would be so kind."
… Frowning, Ned crossed to the window. Petyr Baelish made a casual gesture. "There, across the yard, at the door of the armory, do you see the boy squatting by the steps honing a sword with an oilstone?"
"What of him?"
"He reports to Varys. The Spider has taken a great interest in you and all your doings." He shifted in the window seat. "Now glance at the wall. Farther west, above the stables. The guardsman leaning on the ramparts?"
Ned saw the man. "Another of the eunuch's whisperers?"
"No, this one belongs to the queen. Notice that he enjoys a fine view of the door to this tower, the better to note who calls on you. There are others, many unknown even to me. The Red Keep is full of eyes. Why do you think I hid Cat in a brothel?"
Eddard Stark had no taste for these intrigues. "Seven hells," he swore. It did seem as though the man on the walls was watching him.

—before betraying him.
It's also worth noting that the defenses Ben points out are reminiscent of the Titan of Braavos, which is Petyr's ancestral sigil:

[S]he spied murder holes beneath the Titan's armored skirts, and pale faces staring down at them from behind the iron bars. (AFFC Arya I)

No Heroes

Ben wins command of the Second Sons, but it's not because he's some great hero:

[W]hen [Ben] took command of the Second Sons, he claimed to be the veteran of a hundred battles. "Though I will not say I fought bravely in all of them." (ASOS Daenerys V)

This is a 'rhyming' recursion of Sansa's thoughts about Petyr when Petyr is awarded 'command' of the Riverlands (wearing Plummy colors):

When the herald called, "Lord Petyr Baelish," he came forth dressed all in shades of rose and plum, his cloak patterned with mockingbirds. … Sansa had not heard of Littlefinger doing anything especially heroic during the battle, but it seemed he was to be rewarded all the same. (ACOK Sansa VIII)

Horses And Gold. (For Bribes, Of Course!)

When Dany sends Ben to scout for him, he demands supplies and horses, and extracts gold and gems from her for the purpose of bribing her enemies to change sides:

"We'll need provisions. Fresh horses too."
"Of course. Ser Barristan will see to it."
Brown Ben scratched his chin. "Might be we could get some o' them to come over. If Your Grace could spare a few bags o' gold and gems . . . just to give their captains a good taste, as it were . . . well, who knows?"
"Buy them, why not?" Dany said. That sort of thing went on all the time amongst the free companies of the Disputed Lands, she knew. "Yes, very good. Reznak, see to it." (ADWD Daenerys V)

This is entirely recursive of the conversation Petyr has when he volunteers to ride to Bitterbridge to try to bribe and otherwise persuade the Tyrells and Renly's other former bannermen to change sides:

"There is a chance here, it seems to me. Win Loras Tyrell to our cause and Lord Mace Tyrell and his bannermen might join us as well. … Perhaps we can give them good and sufficient reasons to prefer Joffrey to Stannis…."
"What sort of reasons do you mean to give them?"
"Gold reasons," Littlefinger suggested at once. …
"Bribes might sway some of the lesser lords," Tyrion said, "but never Highgarden." …
"True," Littlefinger admitted. "The Knight of Flowers is the key there. Mace Tyrell has two older sons, but Loras has always been his favorite. Win him, and Highgarden will be yours." …
Littlefinger was not done. "We'll want horses. Swift and strong. The fighting will make remounts hard to come by. A goodly supply of gold will also be needed, for those gifts we spoke of earlier."
"Take as much as you require. If the city falls, Stannis will steal it all anyway."

(Note the way Ben's "provisions" and "gold" are recursive of Littlefinger's "supply of gold".)

Unsuspected & Undespised

Dany never dreamed Ben would betray her:

"I never thought Brown Ben. Even my dragons seemed to trust him." (ADWD Daenerys VI)

Cersei still doesn't begin to suspect that Littlefinger betrayed her by orchestrating Joffrey's murder:

"We shall have need of a new lord treasurer. If the Vale were not so unsettled, I would bring back Petyr Baelish…." - Cersei (AFFC Cersei IX)

Even though Ben betrays Dany, she doesn't want Daario to bring her his head:

[Daario:] "I will bring you back the head of Brown Ben Plumm for a wedding gift."
"No heads," Dany insisted. (ADWD Daenerys VII)

This reworks Cersei insisting that Petyr not be harmed after he (unbeknownst to her) had her son murdered:

"Maester Pycelle, instruct these Lords Declarant that no harm must come to Petyr." -Cersei (AFFC Cersei IV)

Employers of Drunks And Fakes

Brown Ben employs a smith who (a) has a drinking problem such that (b) Kem doesn't consider him a "real armorer":

The smith, this fabled Hammer, proved to be a freakish-looking hulk with a left arm that appeared twice as thick as his right. "He's drunk more than not," Kem said. "Brown Ben lets it go, but one day we'll get us a real armorer." (ADWD Tyrion XII)

At the Eyrie, Petyr employs Lothor Brune as his captain of the guards. It's subtle, but it's employed he has problems when he drinks (if not a drinking problem):

Sober, [Brune] was a quiet man, but a strong one. (AFFC Alayne II)

On the Fingers, Petyr's "captain of the guard" is clearly no one's idea of a real captain of the guard, both because he's 80 and because he's the only guard:

"It is good to have you home, my lord," said one old man. He looked to be at least eighty, but he wore a studded brigantine and a longsword at his side. "How long will you be in residence?"
"As short a time as possible, Bryen, have no fear." … "Bryen—didn't I name you captain of the guard the last time I was here?"
"You did, my lord. You said you'd be getting some more men too, but you never did. Me and the dogs stand all the watches." (ASOS Sansa VI)

The Fucking Of A Lifetime

Ben gives Tyrion the fucking of his life:

"Your cock is as big as in the stories," [Tyrion] said. "Consider me well and truly fucked, Lord Plumm." (ADWD Tyrion XII)

Petyr gives Lysa the fucking of hers:

"Petyr," her aunt moaned. "Oh, Petyr, Petyr, sweet Petyr, oh oh oh. There, Petyr, there. That's where you belong." Lady Lysa's singer launched into a bawdy version of "Milady's Supper," but even his singing and playing could not drown out Lysa's cries. "Make me a baby, Petyr," she screamed, "make me another sweet little baby. Oh, Petyr, my precious, my precious, PEEEEEETYR!" Her last shriek was so loud that it set the dogs to barking, and two of her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth. (ASOS Sansa VI)

So where Petyr gives Lysa an orgasm that "set[s] the dogs to barking", which causes laughter ("her aunt's ladies could scarce contain their mirth", and where Petyr's "lies" turn to flying bugs coming out of his mouth—

When [Littlefinger] opened his mouth to speak, his lies turned to pale grey moths and took wing. (AGOT Eddard XV)

—Ben "[gives] a bark of laughter" and swallows a fly:

Ben Plumm gave a bark of laughter. "There were flies in my ale this morning. I swallowed one of them." (ASOS Daenrys VI)

Note the rhyme within the rhyme: Littlefinger lies → Ben's flies.
There's just no way that Ben Plumm passage isn't contrived with Littlefinger in mind.

CONCLUDED IN OLDEST REPLY, BELOW & HERE

Over from the Patreon. If you haven't read Cass' Aven Cycle, it's really good stuff!
Today we're chatting with Cass Morris, author of the Aven Cycle, a historical fantasy set in an alternate Rome, and co-host of the podcast Worldbuilding for Masochists, an award-nominated podcast discussing the intricacies of worldbuilding in SFF. This means Cass is something of an expert on worldbuilding complexity in fantasy books, which is what I want to talk about today. SFF readers have a particular love of immersing ourselves in richly detailed worlds we can imagine ourselves in viscerally, but let's talk about how writers can actually bring that complexity of detail into focus without totally overwhelming readers.
So to start, I want to talk about political systems, because I love how you managed to make the deep sense of complexity on that front accessible. Ancient Rome: Not an uncomplicated governmental system! And that's before you introduce fantastical elements. People already have trouble understanding how our own governments work, so how do you teach the reader enough that you can play with that complexity for plot intrigue? How do you convey the sense of complexity so the reader understands it without totally bogging down the pacing with exposition?
CASS: Well, one big thing that helps is absolutely the editing process! I'm prone to going into far too much detail on the first try. Multiple pages of too much detail. An entire swamp's worth of getting bogged down. Laying out all the complexities helps me explain them to myself, but it's far more than a reader needs. After the first draft, I could carve out what was totally unnecessary, then simplify the rest enough to be comprehensible, just as, say, The West Wing simplifies the machinations of the White House and Congress without losing what's dramatically interesting about them.
Then, as with so many worldbuilding elements, I think you have to connect political worldbuilding to what a character needs and what's obstructing them. For example: Sempronius Tarren needs to win a certain election to get himself the right provincial posting to set up his longer-term goals. In seeing him make that plan, the reader learns a little about the hierarchy of offices and the powers endowed to each—not a full constitution's worth of details, but enough to understand why the office is desirable and valuable to this character in this moment. Then, the obstruction: His philosophical opponents don't want him gaining what they consider dangerous levels of power, so they throw legal challenges in his way, the same way the US Congress uses things like filibusters. Showing Sempronius' frustration at the block, followed by his own countermove to get around it, feeds the reader more information about how the system works, but through the more engaging lens of his thoughts and emotions.
CASEY: Ha, the existence of editing is a great point. I've done this the opposite way as well—drafted the bones of the story and then filled in later once I knew what kind of detail was called for. But I think the key that you bring up here is that you're focusing on what is relevant to the point-of-view character. They—and we, as the authors—might know and be familiar with all kinds of political nuances the reader isn't, but that doesn't mean you have to teach them all to the reader!
This can get tricky, because deep in the character POV they might notice all those signals, but the ones the reader needs are the ones that are directly relevant to the POV character's goal and its attending conflict. And moreover, it needs to be a specific goal, not something nebulous like, "I want to attain more power." You have a character who wants to accomplish something specific (e.g. win an election), and give them a limited number of people/obstructions who are the actual roadblocks—possibly not the person you'd expect to have the power to stop them, to indicate more nuance in a system, or you can mention in summary other contributing factors that are already in hand, things like that. But limiting the scope helps focus on a few areas to then flesh out in depth, which in turn creates the impression of more depth in general.
It's sort of counterintuitive, but in a way you have room to give more detail with fewer details. And I love how your approach bakes the exposition into the character's agency as they navigate their response to obstructions, because that is so helpful with pacing, too.
DJANGO: A good edit does indeed always help a lot!
For me the biggest barrier to depicting a complex government realistically is the sheer number of people involved. In any government of reasonable size there are hundreds, if not thousands, of potential decision-makers who might have impact on a plot. In a Roman context, beyond the actual elected officials (and there are plenty of those) you have all the other members of important families who didn'tget elected, or are planning to get elected next year, or who lend money to the candidates, or what have you. Thinking about the current US government, the number of characters I personally would recognize (as a more-or-less informed news reader) is both far less than the number who really matter and far morethen we can expect an average novel reader to keep track of.
There are a few techniques that have helped me in the past. The first is just an acceptable break from reality—power in novels tends to be way more centralized than it would "realistically" be. This is true even in very autocratic societies! To go back to my favorite example, in A Game of Thrones the number of major characters involved in the government is probably less than 20—the king, his family, the small council, and the seven Lords Paramount (Stark, Tully, Tyrell, and so on). This is enough that the book has a reputation for complexity and having a lot of characters, but compared to a real government of the type it depicts is probably an order of magnitude too low. GRRM wisely concentrates a lot of functions into personal rule because it works better dramatically for Mace Tyrell or Tywin Lannister to attend to stuff personally than having a hundred ministers and vassals all the time. (It's not a government, but in The Shadow Campaigns the army that the main characters are part of is under-officered in comparison to its historical counterparts—extremely so by British standards!—exactly because this means fewer named characters for everyone to keep track of.)
The other useful trick is to assign representatives—people who can stand in for a large bunch of similar people that we keep coming back to. If you need to write "someone convinces the members of Parliament to vote yes on something," and it doesn't work for there to be some single person who gets to make that choice, you can show the characters meeting with a small number of MPs, say three, and coming back to them several times. With the proper framing as a kind of montage, the reader understands that these are examples and extrapolates. This helps you depict the kind of thing that goes on in the government, which can be just as important as its formal structure. (For example, are you getting the MPs on-side by threats from the party whip, promises of future political favors, or payoffs and patronage?) Joe Abercrombie is particularly good at this, for example in his depiction of the Open Council in Before They Are Hanged.
CASS: Yeah, trimming down the number of people involved is definitely a big help. That's another place where I usually have far too many functionaries and side characters on the first go, then end up consolidating them in following drafts. You can also do a lot just depicting the literal halls of power—how full the building is, how many people are moving around, even the architecture itself can tell the reader a lot about the scale of the governing apparatus, in just a few words of description.
Trimming down the steps of a process also helps. If you look at something like how a bill becomes a law in the United States, it's a lot more complex than Schoolhouse Rock led us to believe! It's not just: 1. Propose Law; 2. Committee Debate; 3: Full Chamber Debate; 4: Vote; 5: Repeat in Other Chamber; 6: President Signs. There are many layers of hearings and markups and financial appropriations, and it's all recursive, because you might have to go through that several times! A little of that may prove interesting, if you can hang an exciting character moment on it or show a really neat procedural trick, but going through the full process will be torture for anyone but the wonkiest of policy wonks.
The Aven Cycle is a fantasy with a strong historical analogue, and I know you have a lot of experience with historical research, between your current dramaturgical work for Camp Halfblood and your formal academic training. So talk to me about how you use history to inform your worldbuilding without restricting your fictional playground with so much research the story becomes didactic. How do you choose what to focus on, and what to leave out? Since women are front and center in these books, I'd love to hear in particular how you focused their stories with a sense of historicity, and how much you could take or chose to invent based on your research.
CASS: I have always been hugely interested in social history: how people live their lives in a given place and time. Sometimes it's strikingly similar to how we experience life today, and sometimes it's so alien—and the same piece of history can be an example of both! I'm fascinated by all the pressure points a society faces and how we create both problems and solutions out of our dominant paradigms. Social history can be hard to uncover, though, because so many of our literary primary sources were composed by wealthy free men, which leaves out most of society. We generally see everyone else through the biased lens of those guys at the top of the heap—at least in what we think of as traditional source material. So, I like exploring less traditional sources.
In the early modern world of my academic training, we do have more surviving written work in the form of letters and journals, but we can also look to things like ecclesiastical records. I promise that's more fascinating than it sounds! Reading up on 17th century slander trials is wild, for example, because those record the exact words that people were using to insult each other—which in turn tells us a lot about what they considered virtuous and what was shameful. Or there's Henslowe's Diary, which gets into granular detail about the income and expenses of a theatre in the 1590s and 1600s.
In the ancient world, archaeology provides more information than words do. The layout of their houses, their furniture, their tools, their kitchen utensils, all of it shows us how people lived. Some of my favorite sources are funerary monuments. Thousands and thousands of these survive, and they document the lives of regular people. The majority, in fact, belong to soldiers or freedmen and their families. They used them to boast of what they'd made of themselves, proud that their children had been born free, proud of the businesses they built. The soldiers spoke about where they'd fought and what awards they won. Some of the most heartbreaking were set up by parents mourning for young children (putting paid to the myth that people didn't get attached to their kids because of high rates of child mortality). Each one is a declaration of the self in defiance of the oblivion of eternity, and I just find that so beautiful.
That's all a long way of saying: I look for the history that shows me people. Those are the details that I want to carry into the text: what they care about, what they value, and the material culture that attends those more abstract concepts. That's the history that ties to character, rather than just being an info-dump.
Even with all that archaeological information, though, we're still stuck with a dearth of information, particularly when it comes to the lives of women and other marginalized groups. So I've had to train myself to look at the absences, the gaps in the record, and try to fill them in, and to look at the sources written by men, then subtract out the biases those men held in order to get to something closer to truth.
It's like looking at the shadow of a tiger. It might give you an idea of the tiger's shape, but only from a particular angle. It may or may not tell you how big a tiger is. It won't tell you that a tiger has stripes, what a tiger sounds like, or what it eats. Examining the lives of marginalized groups in history is often trying to know them by their shadows.
What's clear, though, is that women exerted a lot of power "off-screen" in the ancient world. We have some gorgeous examples: Cornelia, mother of the Gracchi, held up as a paragon of virtue; much-married Fulvia, who ran street gangs, had a feud with Cicero, and waged war against Octavius Caesar; Agrippina Major, popular heroine who gave an emperor so much grief that he had her assassinated; her daughter Agrippina Minor, mother of Nero, whose autobiography is the lost text I'd most like to see miraculously rediscovered. I could go on and on—but I borrowed a lot from all of them when crafting the women of Aven. They were smart and resourceful despite the confines of their society, and whether they played within the boundaries or dared to transgress, they made an impact.
DJANGO: For me this is all about using history to inform my worldbuilding, rather than define it.
I like to think of using history as a case study, an example, rather than a blueprint to be literally followed. If you have a fantasy situation—a type of warfare, an environment, a resource distribution—history provides you with examples of how real people adapted to it, made use of it, and generally applied their ingenuity. People, by and large, don't do obviously stupid things (at least not for very long) and so generally the fact that a society was set up in such-and-such a way and lasted for hundreds of years means that it worked pretty well! (In our modern times of plenty, this can be hard to comprehend; for most of human history, "everyone not dying of starvation" was a great accomplishment requiring constant, unrelenting work.)
This is not to say, of course, that it had to be that way, or that any other way is "unrealistic." The key is to use the historical analogy to understand the kinds of thingsthat were challenges for those people. If they live in, say, a desert, they will have adapted to it in every way: dress, food, shelter, etc. When you read about how they lived, the important thing isn't to copy it exactly, but to make sure that your fantasy people have answers to the same challenges—this is what gives the book verisimilitude!
What I generally find is that no amount of me sitting down and reasoning out the problems people face, a priori, goes even a fraction of the way toward actually understanding those problems; history inevitably throws up fixes that people invented for problems I would never have even considered. (In late medieval France, knife-sharpeners carried circular whetstones—we're talking big, 50 pound stones—on their backs as they went from village to village. The rest of their setup could be constructed from local wood, but big stones of sufficient hardness were very hard to find, and drilling a hole through the middle for the axle was a capital investment!) Lifting these little vignettes for my fantasy society gives it that feel of realism I crave, while still leaving sufficient room to change the aspects of the past that I'm not eager to replicate.
CASS: What gets really fun there is, if you are using a specific historical inspiration but want to make really significant changes, figuring out what happens when you flick the domino. I'm working on a new project now that's a secondworld fantasy instead of an alternate version of our world, but it's inspired by early modern London and the vibe of Shakespeare's theatres. I'm working from that base because I want that aesthetic—but I also want this society to have gender equity, I want them to be accepting of queer identities, I want them to be polytheistic, and the government is more like Venice than England. Those are some really big changes from London in 1600, even before adding magic to the equation!
So then I get to figure out what else in society those things touch: clothing, industry, family structure, bureaucratic structure, and so forth. How would these people, with their worldview, find similar or different answers to problems than the historical examples I'm inspired by? This is why I love worldbuilding, because I find that such a fun game. There are so many possible answers, and I tinker until I find the ones that best fit the story I want to tell.
CASEY: Oh, funerary monuments is a great tip. There's a newsletter called Ælfgif-who? on biographies of early medieval English women, and it's fascinating to see what the author can construct from a combination of records and artifacts and the biases involved, what's said and what's conspicuously not said, what she can guess versus what there's hard evidence for. As a fantasist, I love the possibility space those gaps create that I can fill in.
As Django points out, people have been problem-solving throughout history, and that's not limited to wealthy men. If the records don't talk about what women were doing, it doesn't mean they were sitting on their laurels all day or just accepting whatever men figured out, and you can often get a sense for the space they occupied in the gaps—and if you can't, those gaps can give you ideas for what space they couldoccupy—in history, or in a story.
I think it's also worth noting that historical research can give you a sense of what kinds of social systems go together. I remember reading a fantasy book with a setting inspired by Japan that had all these features that have existed in Japanese history but not at the same time. So it was this mess of things that didn't make any sense together, because the author hadn't paid attention to the historical context.
I don't write historical analogue settings, but even for secondary world fantasy I find it useful to pay attention to what features can work together, and that's especially important once you start changing aspects to suit your story. A society with cell phones is not going to work the same way as one with post. A society where most people can't read won't work the same either! And this matters because it determines what kind of plots you can write, but it's also not super efficient to consider every aspect of the worldbuilding. Like, in a given story I may not need to know how laundry works, or the sewers, or what toys children are playing with. (Sometimes, sure! But not every time.)
But I probably need to know what people are wearing so I can describe them, so it matters what kind of clothing their technology could make and what it costs. I need to know how they communicate with each other, because they're going to do that in pretty much any story.
So I start with a character and plot concept and work backward to build the world around what the story requires them to do, and I do it in this order because otherwise I am exactly the person who will get lost in a worldbuilding rabbit hole at the expense of actually writing the story. But once I start figuring out some of the tentpoles like, This person's unique education makes them critical to the plot (why do they have that education? what education is available to other people?), or more generally, Our heroes will not be able to call for help because the message won't arrive in time (how far does the message need to travel, and how long will it take, and how long to get a response?), that starts to tell you the kinds of things that will be important to put together to make a world that feels internally consistent and enablesyou to tell your story.
If your heroine is rebelling against an arranged marriage, it's worth asking how common arranged marriages are and why and for whom. Like, the whole culture of debutantes in regency England emerged out of economic changes! Social institutions are intertwined, you can't just treat them as piecemeal. But if you do it right, the research gives you more things to play with that inform your characters' histories and choices rather than restricting you based on what "really" happened. Then it's just a matter of focusing on the pieces that actually matter to the story you're actually telling or enhance it in some way.
Lastly, I would be remiss in talking to you specifically about focusing an audience without asking how you use rhetoric to do that very thing (you can find Cass' deep dive on rhetoric in Hamilton, backed by Lin Manuel Miranda himself, on her Patreon). A common piece of writing advice is to never actually write the impossibly dramatic speech in fiction, because it will never be as impressive to readers, and instead focus on the characters' reaction or experience. Do you agree? And are there particular rhetorical devices you like to use to help focus readers' attention on what you want them to notice, whether it's a part of an argument in dialogue or in conveying information in the narrative?
CASS: Oh, you've done a dangerous thing, opening the door of rhetoric for me!
I love rhetoric so much. It's gotten a bad reputation in modern parlance, since most people only ever hear the word in a negative context—political rhetoric, violent rhetoric, and so forth. But rhetoric is nothing more and nothing less than structuring your words to achieve a desired effect. It's deeply woven into everything writers do, whether or not you're the kind of ultra-nerd who memorizes the Greek names for a few hundred devices. I think some of the best writers (like Shakespeare and LMM) do it in part instinctively, because they have such a good ear for how people speak and for the cadence of language, but it's also a skill that you can hone and train.
Rhetoric serves many purposes, and a lot of it is about crafting a character's voice, both in dialogue and in their POV narration. It lends a lot of texture to the story, and it's something I find particularly useful in crafting multi-POV books. Subtle shifts in how characters use language can help center a reader within each individual POV.
In dialogue, I think about vocal quirks that are marks of character and tell you something about the speaker, then I use rhetoric to craft the effect. Who's prone to using more words than necessary, either because they like hearing themselves talk or because they're babbling (devices like pleonasm and accumulatio)? Who likes intricate descriptions (enargia), and who's a champion of deadpan understatement (litotes)? Who, in a state of excitement or eagerness, asks too many questions without waiting for an answer (pysma)? Who's so pompous or instructive that they answer their own questions (anythypophora)? Not that rhetoric is the only tool for playing with these things, of course, but it's the frame I personally like best.
It gets particularly fun when I get to write political arguments, because those speakers are conscious of their own devices to the point of weaponizing them. They'll ask lots of what we call rhetorical questions (erotema), where there's an obvious answer that they're looking for; they'll repeat their ideas in sets of three (tricolon), because that helps the audience to remember them; they'll seize on an important word their opponent used and twist it around some other way (asteismus). They're deliberately showing off, and following the minutiae of the argument often isn't as important for the reader as understanding that they're tweaking each other and trying to one-up each other. The rhetoric lets me communicate those character dynamics in fun ways—similar to the "Cabinet Battle" scenes in Hamilton!
Writers have rhetorical tics, too, which can sometimes become a vice, if you're not aware of them, but which are also part of each author's unique voice. I'm particularly prone to a certain combo of devices: zeugma plus anaphora/isocolon. Zeugma is when two or more words, phrases, or clauses are dependent upon the same other word (usually the main verb of a sentence), as in "I love you truly, madly, deeply." All three adverbs hang on the same main verb. Anaphora is repetition of the same word or phrase at the beginning of successive clauses, and isocolon is parallel structure. "I came, I saw, I conquered" is an example of both: the repeated "I" at the beginning and the structure of "I + [past tense verb]".
I then sometimes layer that combo with auxesis, a series of clauses or phrases that gradually ascend in importance. You make a list, and the most important thing is last. That's the traditional definition, at least, but I had a professor who argued that auxesis can also work in the opposite direction, where your series diminishes rather than growing, and I do think that can be equally impressive, especially when you want to narrow a reader's or listener's focus. So, the zeugma-anaphora/isocolon-auxesis combo move gives me the opportunity to show a character becoming more intense or more pointed as they're working their way through a thought. If that ends up being shaped like self-correction, then it's also epanorthosis. I recognize that I'm nerding hard at this point! But this is what I find so fun about rhetoric: the devices don't operate in isolation, but layer and intertwine to craft specific moments and that desired effect on the reader.
As to writing the Impossibly Dramatic Speech—I don't think it is impossible, but I do think it's something to use cautiously. You have to pick your moment, for one thing, and it's not always the moment you might think. Not all magnificent speeches are Henry V bucking up his followers on the eve of Agincourt. Sometimes, the magnificent speech is a lover pleading to be heard, a con artist deceiving a mark, a sister quietly giving advice. (See? I told you I'm prone to the zeugma-anaphora/isocolon-auxesis combo!)
It's easier to get away with the big speech on stage or film, because there, the actor is an essential component of the equation. On the page of a novel, the writing itself has a heavier load to carry. So I think you can get away with presenting a well-crafted Impossibly Dramatic Speech in a well-chosen moment, but not all in one block. Interposing the speaker's words with other elements helps to break it up and remind the reader why the speech matters. Maybe you cut away to show the audience's reactions; maybe you cut inside the speaker's head to show them nerving themselves up for it, or debating what to say next, or consciously choosing where they pause.
And here I'll throw another device at you: within a speech, choosing to pause is called aposiopesis. Mark Antony does it at the end of the first bit of his "Friends, Romans, countrymen" speech, when he says he's been overcome with emotion, "My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar, and I must pause till it come back to me." Practically speaking, that gives the actor a break so they don't have to do 140 lines all at once, but it also gives the plebeians a chance to speak and the audience a chance to witness how Antony's words are having an effect. In a novel, a writer can effectively use aposiopesis in another way, breaking the speech up with descriptive elements, which helps to ground the lofty rhetoric back in the reality of the world and the immediacy of the moment.
CASEY: Rhetoric gives us so many tools to play with! Thank you for all those examples. I think it's worth highlighting your point that writers don't have to know what specific rhetorical devices are called to be able to employ them effectively. Adjusting sentence structure and word choice to match character or moment or the rhythm of the plot is doing exactly this work, paying close attention to howyour words are working.
Strategic repetition is a favorite of mine. I love repeating a structure multiple times in a row, particularly with paragraph breaks, because then the white space and alignment helps emphasize what I'm doing. That's something you can't do the same way in other mediums! I also love repeating a line a different character said and twisting its meaning in later dialogue—you have to in some way make sure the reader recognizes the reference, but there are lots of ways to do that.
With novels, we can't rely on visible reactions from the audience or an actor's delivery, but we can manage pacing with punctuation, with narration interspersed or removed. I also love doing the equivalent of an anime peanut gallery ("Did she do it?" "Yes, the attack landed!" "But look at her—now she's almost out of power; she only has one more shot. Will she last another round?") as a way to make sure the reader notices the undercurrents and how they're changing the stakes. And that works just as well in fraught conversations as fight scenes.
This can be especially important in scenes like political debates that are doing heavy interplay of character dynamics, but depending on the scene's goals, sometimes you can do this with telling, too, rather than showing—in The Hands of the Emperor,there's an anecdote about a character capping a joke perfectly; we never learn the joke or the reply, but the content of the words isn't what matters in this case as much as the context, that these characters having just met are able to match each other with no regard to the impropriety. That said, if we're instead in a romance where a plot beat hinges on one main character changing the other's mind, in almost all cases we're going to need that whole conversation to track the minute character shifts that drive romances at their core—and you can give those conversations extra impact by grounding them in the specific words they've said to and thought about each other before.
DJANGO: Rhetoric is an area where I don't have much training, I have to say, so I'll be the one who goes for "don't actually write the speech out." =) I do a fair bit of this in The Shadow Campaigns, in particular for Danton's magically-effective speeches in The Shadow Throne, which obviously aren't going to be replicated in text. In addition to the problems of being able to actually write a good speech—as Cass demonstrates, there's a lot more going on there then you might think!—it can also be hard to replicate the effect on an in-universe audience.
First of all, while the people in the book are hearing something delivered live, the readers are getting it written down, stripped of the power that a really good speaker can give it. Second, the diegetic audience are different people than the reader, with a different set of cultural assumptions and values. This can be as simple as feeling a stir of pride when language or music evokes national symbols, and goes all the way to complicated cultural markers and tropes. (What we'd today call memes!) The best rhetoric is often the most targeted at its specific audience, specifically because that can be so effective, but the result can leave modern readers cold. It's definitely one of those areas that depends on the author's strengths and the style of the narrative.
Cass, what have you been working on, and what's coming up for you next?
CASS: The Bloodstained Shade, Book 3 of the Aven Cycle, just released at the end of January. It's out in paperback and ebook now, and there's an audiobook coming in May. There will be a Book 4, someday, but at the moment I'm working on something entirely different—the secondworld fantasy inspired by early modern London that I mentioned earlier. That's still in drafting stage, and I'm so enjoying the ongoing application of everything I've learned about worldbuilding and writing craft in the past few years.
Event-wise, I'm doing a virtual workshop on developing magical systems for the Orange County Public Library on March 21st—open to anyone, whether you're an OCPL member or not! Then I'll be at RavenCon April 21-23 in Richmond, VA and at ConCarolinas June 2-4 in Charlotte, NC.
For more worldbuilding goodness, you can find me along with co-hosts Rowenna Miller and Marshall Ryan Maresca on Worldbuilding for Masochists, our two-time Hugo Finalist podcast! Available on all your favorite podcast platforms, with new episodes dropping every other Wednesday. We start our fifth year in June, and we'll be kicking off the season with a pretty exciting announcement!
I usually direct people to Twitter @CassRMorris as the best place to find me for general chatting, and while that's still the best place for now, with the increasing instability of the old bird, I'll also direct folks toward my LinkTree, which will always have the most up-to-date social media haunts, and my Substack, for major announcements and random acts of blogging.

by William Tyndale

I. The Pre-Reformation Period (1215 – 1515)II. The Reformation Period (1516 – 1563) III. The Post-Reformation Period (1564 – 1689)

I. The Pre-Reformation Period (1215 – 1515) 1215 Signing of Magna Carta; English barons force King John to agree to a statement of their rights
1290 Edward I expells all Jews from England
1291 Sacreans (Muslims) capture Accre, last Christian stronghold in Palestine; end of Crusades after 200 years
1294 Kublai Khan dies after 35-year reign establishing Ming dynasty
1295 England’s Model Parliament—Edward I summons bishops, knights, and burgesses from all parishes for first representative parliament
1296 A Genoese prisoner, Marco Polo, writes about his travels to Orient
1302 “Unam Sanctam,” papal bull of Pope Boniface VIII, asserts papal supremacy over every human being
King Philip IV of France convenes first Estates-General (Parliament) with all estates represented
1306 England expels 100,000 Jews who remained after Edward expulsion order of 1290
1307 Dante Alighieri, Italian poet, begins writing The Divine Comedy
1309 Pope Clement, a Frenchman, move papal court to Avignon, France, beginning “The Babylonian Captivity,” lasting until 1377
1310 England’s barons force Edward II to appoint lords ordainers to help him rule
Parliament rules taxation shall be imposed only by Parliament
c. 1310 Perfection of the mechanical clock
1314 Battle of Bannockburn assures independence of Scotland—30,000 Scotsmen under Robert Bruce VIII rout 100,000 led by Edward II
1318 At Battle of Dundalk, Ireland’s Edward Bruce killed three years after being proclaimed king
1325 Mexico City has its beginning in the city of Tenochtitlan founded by Aztecs in Lake Texcoco
1326 Queen Isabella and her paramour, Roger Mortimer, invade England and capture her husband, Edward II
First mention of gunpowder (in Venice) for warfare
1327 Edward II is killed in prison; Isabella’s 14-year-old son becomes Edward III
1328 Louis IV invades Italy and declares Pope John XXII deposed for heresy
1330 John Wycliffe born in Wycliffe-on-Tees
Edward III seizes power, ends regencey of Isabella and Mortimer
1337 Beginning of “Hundred Years War” between England and France—Edward III assumes title of King of France; French king Philip VI contests England’s claims to Normandy
1338 Declaration of Rhense—Electors of Holy Roman Empire can select emperor without papal intervention
1341 English Parliament divided into Upper House (Lords) and Lower House (Commons)
1345 Cathedral of Notre Dame completed in Paris after 182 years of construction
1346 Battle of Crecy establishes England as military power; English longbowmen change face of warfare
1347–1351 The Black Death (bubonic plague) devastates Europe, killing as many as two-thirds of the population in some parts
1348 Black Death reaches England
1349 Death of William of Ockham, English philosopher, who sowed seeds of independance of church and state
1351 England removes Pope’s power to give English benefices to foreigners
1353 Parliament’s Statue of Praemunrie forbids appeals to the Pope
1356 Edward, the Black Prince of Wales, destroys French army at Battle of Poitiers
“The Golden Bull” of Holy Roman Emperor Charles IV transforms empire from monarchy into aristocratic federation to last 450 years
1359 First Swedish Riksdag (parliament); all classes represented
1360 First francs coined in France
1362 English becomes the authorized language of the law courts; French still used for legal documents
Piers Plowman written by English poet over next 30 years
Palace of Popes at Avignon completed after 28 years of construction
1366 Parliament refuses to pay feudal tribute to Pope
Statute of Kilkenny forbids marriage between Irish and English
1370 Wycliffe’s First Presentation of his doctrine on the Eucharist; he clarifies a theme which is later enshrined as a central doctrine of the Reformation
John Ball in England preaches man’s natural equality
1374 John of Gaunt returns from French wars to become leader of the state
1377 Rioting ends Wycliffe’s trial at St. Paul’s
Pope Gregory XI issues five bulls against Wycliffe
Wycliffe agrees to “house arrest” at Oxford
Leaving Avignon, Pope Gregory XI moves papal court to Rome; ending the “Babylonian Captivity”
1378 Queen Mother ends Wycliffe’s trial at Lambeth Palace
The Great Schism divides the Catholic Church for 39 years when two opposing popes are elected—Pope Urban V in Rome and Pope Clement VII in Avignon{Avignon }
1378 Pope Urban VI presides in Rome whilst Pope Clement VII presides in Avignon
1381 John Wycliffe publishes Confession, denying that the "substance" of bread and wine are miraculously changed during the Eucharist; Wycliffe withdraws from public to Lutterworth
The Peasant Revolt; 30,000 rioters converge on London; ends when Wat Tyler, their leader, is betrayed and killed
1381–1384 Wycliffe, with the assistance of his aides, intensifies his work on an English translation of Bible (from the Latin Vulgate not the Biblical Greek and Hebrew); this is the first translation of the Bible into the English tongue
1382 Blackfriars Synod condemns Wycliffe’s writings, followed by purge of Wycliffites at Oxford.
1383 Wycliffe, “morning star of the Reformation”, dies on New Year’s Eve
1387 Chaucer begins work on The Canterbury Tales
1389 Statute of Provisors makes papal appointments in England invalid
1393 Second Statue of Praemunrie prohibits introduction of papal bulls
1399 John of Gaunt dies; Richard II confiscates his estates; John Gaunt’s son, Henry of Bolingbroke, returns from exile and is acclaimed by Parliament as King Henry IV; Richard II dies a year later in prison
1414 Sir Jon Oldcastle (Lord Cobham), disciple of Wycliffe, burned at stake
1415 The Council of Constance condemns Wycliffe on 267 different heresies
At Battle of Agincourt, Henry V leads English archers in victory over larger French cavalry
Council of Constance condemns Wycliffe of 267 heresies and demands that John Hus recant; he refuses and is burned at the stake
1428 At papal command, remains of Wycliffe dug up, burned, and scattered on the river Swift
1431 Jeanne d'Arc (Joan of Arc) burned as a witch at Rouen
1452 Leonardo da Vinci born
1453 Sack of Constantinople by the Turks; Christian refugees are welcomed into Florence bring their libraries, including ancient copies of the Greek Septuagint, with them; this encourages the revival of “New Learning” throughout western Europe and will make possible Erasmus’s ground breaking work on the Greek New Testament (the basis of the Textus Receptus)
End of Hundred Years War between England and France
1455 Gutenberg completes printing the Bible using movable type (first printing of the Bible in any language); the invention of the commercial printing press revolutionizes how knowledge and information are shared; it proves to be an essential and powerful tool in spreading the Gospel
War of Roses begin in England
1463 Turks capture Bosnia
c. 1469 Erasmus born
1469 Lorenzo de’ Medici rules Florence
Ferdinand and Isabella marry
1470 Portuguese explorers discover Gold Coast of Africa
1471 Thomas á Kempis, author of The Imitation of Christ, dies
1473 Copernicus born
1476 William Caxton sets up printing press at Westminster
1478 Spanish Inguisition Spanish Inquisition persecutes Jews, Muslims, and heretics
1480 Ferdinand and Isabella appoint Inquisition against heresy among converted Jews
Ivan III styles himself Czar of the Russians
1482 Portuguese explorers discover bananas on west coast of Africa
1483 Luther is born at Eisleben (November 10)
1484 “At Hammel in Saxony, on the 20th of June, 1484, the Devil, in the likeness of a pied piper, carried away 130 children, that were never after seen.”
Japan’s shogun Yoshimasa introduces the tea ceremony
Ulrich (Huldrych) Zwingli born at Wildhaus (Toggenburg) in Canton of St. Gall
1484 Caxton prints Morte D'Arthur, the poetic collection of legends about King Arthur compiled by Sir Thomas Malory
1485 Treaty of Leipzig divides Saxony
Henry VII crowned first king of 117-year Tudor dynasty
1488 Battle of Bosworth on August 22 ends England’s 15-year Wars of the Roses;
1489 Symbols + and – come into use
1490 Beginnings of ballet at Italian courts
1491 Henry VIII born
1492 Spanish forces conquer city of Granada, expelling Islamic Moors from Iberian peninsula
Christopher Columbus, with three ships and 78 men set sail on September 6 after first attempt aborted; arrives in the Bahamas, thinking he has reached the East Indies
Lorenzo de’ Medici dies
Christopher Columbus introduces Europeans to the pineapple, parrots, Indians, peppers, allspice, maize, and sweet potatoes
Nuremberg geographer Behaim constructs first terrestrial globe
Leonardo da Vinci draws a flying machine
Profession of publisher emerges, consisting of typefounder, printer, and bookseller
Inquisitor-general Torquemada gives Spanish Jews three months to convert or leave country; 200,000 Jews are expelled
1493 Maximilian I becomes Holy Roman Emperor
The pope divides the New World between Spain and Portugal
1494 First mobile artillery firing iron cannon balls, used by Charles VIII in Italy
c.1494 William Tyndale is born
1495 First recorded outbreak of syphilis; infects army of Charles VIII at Naples
Leonardo da Vinci’s “Last Supper”
1496 Menno Simons born
John Cabot reaches coast of Newfoundland; Vasco de Gama discovers west coast of India
1497 The College of Cardinals discusses a church bill condemning “licentious clergy,” but the idea is soon dropped
Melanchthon born
Albrecht Durer paints Apocalypse
John Cabot discovers Newfoundland
1498 Savonarola burned at the stake for heresy in Florence
Vasco de Cama establishes sea route between Portugal and India
1499 War between Swabian League and Swiss Cantons. Swiss victory forces Treaty of Basel granting Swiss independance
Granada’s Moors revolt as Inquisitor de Cisneros introduces forced wholesale Christian conversion
1500 Pope Alexander VI proclaims a Year of Jubilee; imposes a tithe for crusade against Turks
First human Caesarian operation performed by Swiss pig gelder Jakob Nufer
Postal service between Vienna and Brussels established
1501 Music printed for the first time by use of movable type
Peace of Trent between France and Emperor Maximilian I recognizes French conquests in Upper Italy
Erasmus’ Enchiridion promotes a Christianity based on the Sermon of the Mount
Michaelangelo completes Pieta
Papal bull orders the burning of any books questioning Church’s authority
1502 University of Wittenberg established by Frederick, Elector of Saxony
1503 Canterbury Cathedral completed after 436 years of construction
Da Vinci paints “Mona Lisa”
Pocket handkerchief comes into use
1504 Venice sends ambassadors to Sultan of Turkey, proposing construction of a Suez Canal
1505 John Knox , the leader of the Scottish Reformation, is born
1506 William Tyndale (age 12?) enters Magdalen College at Oxford; as a youth “singularly addicted to the scriptures”, he reads the Bible in English (translating from the Latin Vulgate) to his fellow students (11 years prior to Luther’s 95 Thesis).
Pope Julius orders work on St. Peter’s in Rome; Da Vinci’s “Mona Lisa”
1507 Martin Luther ordained and celebrates first Mass
New geography by Waldseemüller proposes the New World be called “America” after Amerigo Vespucci
League of Cambrai formed by Margaret of Austria, the Cardinal of Rouen, and Ferdinand of Aragon to despoil Venice
Diet of Constance recognizes unity of Holy Roman Empire
1508 Michelangelo begins painting Sistine Chapel ceiling
1509 Henry VIII assumes English throne and marries Catherine of Aragon
Luther visits Rome
First shipload of African slaves arrives in Hispaniola (Haiti)
John Calvin, the Swiss Reformer, is born in Noyon, France
Erasmus writes Praise of Folly at Thomas More’s home
1510 African slaves cross the Atlantic to work in Portuguese sugar plantations in Brazil
1511 Pope Julius forms Holy League with Venice and Aragon to drive French out of city; Henry VIII joins Holy League
1512 William Tyndale completes his B.A. at Oxford
Ponce de Leon discovers Florida
Copernicus publishes that the earth actually revolves around the sun
Forces of the Holy League meet defeat at Ravenna; coalition of Swiss, papal, and imperial forces drive French and their German mercenaries out of Milan
1513 Giovanni de Medici becomes Pope Leo X—“one of most severe trials to which God ever subjected his church”
Peasant and labor rebellions spread eastward from Switzerland
Henry VIII conducts brief invasion of France
Balboa discovers the Pacific Ocean
1515 Tyndale completes his M.A. at Oxford and is ordained, but refuses to enter monastic orders
Thomas Wolsey is appointed Cardinal and Lord Chancellor of England
II. The Reformation Period (1516 – 1563)
Select another Time Period: < Pre-Reformation > < Post Reformation >
(1215 - 1515) (1564 - 1689) 1516–17 Erasmus publishes his edition of Greek-Latin New Testament, Novum Instrumentum; this translation powerfully demonstrated the corruption of the Latin Vulgate’s text; Erasmus promotes the translation of the Bible into vernacular tongues for reading by the plowboy and the “simplest woman”
Pope Julius II convenes the Lateran Council to undertake reforms in abuses of Church in Rome
Sir Thomas More writes Utopia
1517 Martin Luther posts 95 theses in protest against saleable indulgences
Erasmus publishes anti-war tract
Tetzel hired by Albert of Mainz to sell indulgences
1518 At meeting of Augustinians in Heidelberg, Luther defends his theology; later he appears before Cardinal Cajetan at Augsburg, but refuses to recant; in December, Frederick the Wise protects Luther from being handed over to Rome.
1518–22 The Spanish carry out their conquest of Mexico
1519 Luther questions papal infallibility in a debate
Luther begins New Testament sermon series, signaling new era of Biblical preaching
Zwingli begins New Testament sermons; Swiss reformation is born
Cortes enters Aztec capital, Tenochtitlan
Charles V (of Spain) succeeds Maximilian as Holy Roman Emperor
1520 Papal bull “Exsurge Domine” gives Luther 60 days to recant or be excommunicated; writes 3 seminal documents: To the Christian Nobility, On the Babylonian Captivity of the Church, and The Freedom of a Christian; burns papal bull and canon law
Suleiman I (the Magnificent) becomes sultan of the Ottoman Empire (Turks)
1521 Cambridge students form a study-group at the White Horse Tavern Little Bilney, William Tyndale, John Frith, and Thomas Cranmer are among them
Luther is Excommunicated by the papal bull Decet Romanum Pontificem; at Diet of Worms in April, he refuses to recant writings, and edict (in May) condemns him as heretic and outlaw; he is “kidnapped” and hidden at Wartburg Castle; begins translating the New Testament into German
Religious unrest in Wittenberg: private masses abolished, Karlstadt serves Communion in both elements, religious statues destroyed
Pope titles Henry VIII “Defender of the Faith” for attacking Luther’s views of the sacraments
Lutheran books appear in England
“Zwickau prophets,” early Anabaptists, arrive in Wittenberg
Pope Leo X dies, succeeded by Hadrian VI
The Turks capture Belgrade
Carlstadt celebrates first Protestant communion at Wittenburg
Diet of Worms; Luther refuses to recant; gets backing of German princes; begins German translation of Bible
1521–1523 William Tyndale begins teaching at Little Sodbury; disputes with local clergy and is arraigned on charges of heresy; translates Erasmus’s Enchiridion
1522 Anabaptist movement begins in Germany
Stump and Reublin challenge paying of tithes
Luther introduces German liturgy in Wittenburg
1523 Tyndale resides with Humphrey Monmouth in London
1524 Tyndale seeks patronage of Bishop Tunstall and is rebuffed; then, assisted by Monmouth, he travels to Germany and registers at the University of Wittenburg
1524 Luther debates Karlstadt on the Lord’s Supper
Erasmus publishes On Freedom of the Will
Peasant Wars breaks out in southern Germany
Diet of Nuremberg fails to enforce Edict of Worms condemning Luther
1525 In Cologne, Tyndale prepares to print an English New Testament; but he is discovered and escapes with only a few printed portions
Anabaptist movement begins in Zürich, spreads to Germany; First Zürich disputation with those opposed to infant baptism; First believer’s baptism in Zürich; Denck banished from Nuremberg for views on Lord’s Supper; First Anabaptist congregation of 35 converts established in Zollikon; First imprisonment of Anabaptists occurs in Zürich; they escape
Luther marries Katherine von Bora; writes Bondage of the Will (against Erasmus).
Charles V defeats Francis I; Elector Frederick the Wise dies;
France makes pact with Suleiman I
1526 Tyndale completes the printing of New Testament (in Worms); (It is the first printing of the New Testament in English and the first English translation of the scriptures from the Biblical Greek); smuggled copies of his New Testaments are soon being circulated throughout England
Cardinal Wolsey presides at a massive burning of “Lutheran” books
Reformation spreads to Sweden and Denmark
League of Torgau formed; First Diet of Speyer postpones enforcement of Edict of Worms
Erasmus publishes the works of St. Augustine
1527 Bishop Tunstall orders the purchase and burning of all the testaments; but this serves only to finance Tyndale’s second edition of the New Testament
The German and Spanish Imperial troops of Charles V sack Rome
Basel orders corporeal punishment and confiscation of property for adult baptism and sheltering Anabaptists
Luther pens “A Mighty Fortress”; writes against Zwingli’s views on the Lord’s Supper
First Protestant university (Marburg) founded
Plague strikes Wittenberg
1527–1530 English agents seek to capture Tyndale on the Continent; he keeps moving and continues to translate and write
1528 Reformation established in Bern
Swabian League authorizes military division of 400 horsemen to scout for Anabaptists
Thomas Bilney, respected Cambridge preacher and “Lutheran sympathizer,” is dragged from his pulpit and imprisoned
Simon Fish, a London attorney and amateur actor who has fled to Antwerp after spoofing the clergy, writes "A Supplication for Beggars", which urges an end to taxes for Rome. (Henry VIII really likes this book.)
1529 Tyndale publishes Obedience of a Christian Man; Sir Thomas More begins writing against Tyndale and Luther (Dialogue)
Henry VIII dismisses Lord Chancellor Thomas Wolsey for failing to obtain the Pope's consent to his divorce from Catherine of Aragon; Sir Thomas More appointed Lord Chancellor; Henry VIII summons the “Reformation Parliament" and begins to cut the ties with the Church of Rome
Reformation becomes official in Basel
Diet of Speyer—Luther’s followers name Protestants (first use of the term)
Luther and Zwingli attend Marburg Colloquy, but no agreement reached on the Lord’s Supper
Tyrolean Anabaptists flea homeland for Moravia
Diet of Speyer restores death penalty for rebaptizing
Turks lay siege to Vienna
1530 Tyndale’s translation of the the first five books of the Old Testament appears in England (printed in Worms); he also publishes Practice of Prelates
Hoffman baptizes 300 Anabaptists in Emden and sends lay preachers to Netherlands
Luther, as outlaw, cannot attend the Diet of Augsburg, held in attempt to end religious division in the empire; Melanchthon presents Augsburg Confession, a statement of Lutheran beliefs
Protestants form Schmalkaldic League against Emperor Charles V
1531 Tyndale meets Henry VIII’s agent Steven Vaughan, but declines the king’s invitation to return to England; Tyndale’s translation of the Book of Jonah and his Exposition of the first Epistle of St. John are printed; Tyndale responds to Thomas More’s Dialogue, with An Answer
Thomas Bilney is burned at stake
Bullinger succeeds Zwingli and publishes first book against Anabaptists
Zwingli angles for French support for the Reformation by allowing Swiss mercenaries to be hired
Dressed in battle armor, Zwingli joins the forces on October 11 and is killed in battle
1532 Thomas More responds to Tyndale’s An Answer with his Confutation; Tyndale, choosing to spend his energies in more essential endeavors, breaks off debate with More
English clergy submit to Henry VIII
Calvin starts Protestant movement in France; publishes his first work—a commentary on Seneca’s De Clementia.
Diet of Regensburg and Peace of Nuremberg guarantee religious toleration in face of Turkish threat
1533 Tyndale’s translation of Erasmus’s Enchiridion and his revision of chapters five, six, and seven of Matthew’s Gospel are printed; his beloved friend, John Frith, is burned at the stake in Smithfield;
Thomas Cranmer appointed Archbishop of Canterbury; (This effectly ends clerical celibacy among Anglicans, as Cranmer is twice-married)
The Act in Restraint of Appeals prohibits appeals to the bishop of Rome.
Henry VIII’s marriage to Catherine is declared void; Anne Boleyn crowned Queen
Calvin and Nicolas Cop flee Paris. At about this time Calvin undergoes a “sudden conversion.”
Hutter joins Moravian group who become known as Hutterites
Pizarro conquers Peru
Ivan “the Terrible” (age 3) ascends Russian throne
1534 Tyndale’s revised New Testament is printed; he moves into Thomas Poyntz’s English merchants’ boarding house in Antwerp (English House)
Pope Paul III, the father of three illegitimate children, comes to power
Luther completes translation of Bible into German
Act of Supremacy Henry VIII establishes himself as Supreme Head of Church and Clergy of England
Ignatius Loyola founds Society of Jesus to spread Counter Reformation
Strassburg decrees that Anabaptists must leave the city
1535 King’s agent Henry Phillips arrives in Antwerp and “befriends” Tyndale, then arranges to have him arrested while Thomas Poyntz is out of town; Tyndale is cast into Vilvoorde prison near Brussels
Myles Coverdale, a close aide of Tyndale, translates the portions of the Old Testament not completed by Tyndale (relying heavily on Tyndale's early drafts) and publishes the "Coverdale Bible"; This is the first printing of the entire Bible in the English language
Thomas More and Cardinal Fisher beheaded for opposing Henry VIII
Anabaptist uprising at Münster put down, and Anabaptists executed
Charles V conquers Tunis and frees 20,000 Christian slaves; Emperor forms Catholic Defense League
France makes pact with Suleiman I
1536 Following a fifteen month imprisonment William Tyndale is strangled and burned at stake for heresy (6th October)
Luther agrees to Wittenberg Concord on the Lord’s Supper, in an attempt to resolve differences with other reformers, but the Zwinglians do not accept it
Denmark and Norway become Lutheran;
Erasmus dies
Menno Simons breaks with Rome; becomes Anabaptist leader in Netherlands
Calvin is persuaded by Farel to remain in Geneva; publishes the first edition of Institutes of the Christian Religion
Henry VIII dissolves 376 monasteries and nuneries
1537 John Rogers, a close aide of Wm. Tyndale, publishes the second complete English Bible. Because the major part of this Bible was the translation of Tyndale, whose writings had been condemned by the English authorities, it is published under the pseudonym "Thomas Matthew". The "Matthew's Bible" is a composite made up of Tyndale's Pentateuch and New Testament (1534-1535 edition) and Coverdale's Bible and a small amount of Roger's own translation.
1538 Landgrave Philip of Hesse arranges debate between Anabaptists and Bucer; results in Hessian Anabaptists returning to state church and state church deciding to excommunicate immoral Christians
Calvin and Farel are banished from Geneva. Calvin goes to Strasbourg as pastor to the French-speaking congregation.
Luther writes against the Jews in Against the Sabbatarians
1539 Thomas Cranmer, the Archbishop of Canterbury, at the bequest of the King Henry VIII commissions Myles Coverdale to publish a large pulpit Bible. It became the first English Bible authorized for public use, distributed to every church and chained to the pulpit. The Great Bible was approved by Henry VIII: “sent abroad among the people” to be read by all and “set forth with the king’s most gracious license”.
This Bible — mostly comprised of Tyndale’s translation — was known as the "Great Bible" due to its great size: a large pulpit folio measuring over 14 inches tall. Seven editions of this version were printed between April of 1539 and December of 1541. Printers and sellers of books were encouraged to provide for the “free and liberal use of the Bible in our own maternal English tongue”. By the decree of the king every church was to provide a reader so that the illiterate could hear the Word of God in their own tongue. It would seem that William Tyndale's last prayer had been granted three years after his martyrdom.
The Six Articles, against Lutheranism. Hugh Latimer, bishop of Winchester, resigns in protest. Henry VIII is still occasionally burning Lutherans and hanging Roman Catholics.
Henry VIII marries and divorces Anne of Cleves, executes the now-unpopular Thomas Cromwell, and marries Katherine Howard.
Cardinal Sadeleto writes letter to Geneva. Calvin is asked to respond on behalf of Geneva.
Frankfurt Truce declared between Catholic and Protestant territories
1539–40 Simons publishes the Foundation Book of Anabaptist faith
1540 Pope recognizes order of Jesuits; will make them the chief agents of Counter Reformation
Conferences at Hagenau and Worms fail to reconcile Protestants and Catholics
1541 John Calvin establishes theocracy in Geneva
John Knox establishes Calvinist Reformation in Scotland
Peter Riedeman writes Hutterite Confession of Faith
Henry VIII assumes titles of King of Ireland and Head of Irish Church
At Conference of Regensburg, Melanchthon and Bucer reach agreement with Catholics on most doctrines, but Luther and Rome reject their work
Calvin writes a treatise on free will against the Roman Catholic theologian Albert Pighius
1543 Luther writes On the Jews and Their Lies
Copernicus writes that earth revolves around sun
Alliance between Henry and Charles V (Holy Roman Emperor) against Scotland and France
1544 Ferdinand I and Suleiman I agree to truce
Council of Trent, for reform of Catholic Church, opens
Cranmer instructed to write prayers and a litany (for the army) in English. He does this so well that he is asked to make a prayer book in English, based on the service at Salisbury Cathedral
1545 Henry VIII's last speech to Parliament; He says Papist, Lutheran, Anabaptist are names devised by the devil to sunder one man's heart from another
Luther writes Against the Papacy at Rome, an Institution of the Devil
Peace of Augsburg allows rulers to determine religion of their region
1546 Luther dies
1547 Henry VIII dies
1553 Edward VI dies; succeeded by Mary I (“Bloody Mary”)
Servetus, Spanish theologian and physician executed in Geneva as a heretic
1554 Mary I marries Philip (later Philip II of Spain); Catholicism restored in England; Elizabeth is imprisoned. During Mary’s reign, about 300 Protestants are burned, including 5 bishops, 100 priests, 60 women. John Rogers, Tyndale's close assistant (alias "Thomas Matthew"), is the first to burn. Protestants are forced into exile or hiding. An attempt by Cardinal Pole (Mary's archbishop of Canterbury) to restore monasticism fizzles when, among 1500 surviving monks, nuns, and friars, fewer than 100 are willing to return to celibacy.
In the 1550's the Church in Switzerland was very sympathetic to the reformer refugees and was one of only a few safe havens for a desperate people. Many of them gathered in Geneva, led by Myles Coverdale and John Foxe as well as Thomas Sampson and William Whittingham. Over 200 including 8 pastors and 2 bishops found refuge in John Knox’s congregation and there were many more English Protestants in exile elsewhere. There, with the protection of John Calvin, the Church of Geneva determined to produce a Bible that would educate their families while they continued in exile.
1555 Bishops Hugh Latimer and Nicholas Ridley are burned at the stake as Cranmer watches; Later John Hooper and John Bradford are also burned
1556 Archbishop Thomas Cranmer, is forced to recant but later repudiates; He is burned at the stake
1557 Publication of Geneva New Testament
1560 Publication of Geneva Bible (complete Old and New Testament); This is the first time a Bible is printed with verse divisions
1563 Thirty-Nine Articles drafted as a doctrinal statement by a convocation of the Church of England.
John Foxe's publishes Acts & Monuments ("Foxe’s Book of Martyrs"); to this day it remains the only exhaustive reference work on the persecution and martyrdom of Early Christians and Protestants from the first century up to the mid-16th century
III. The Post-Reformation Period (1564 – 1689)
Select another Time Period: < Pre-Reformation > < Reformation >
(1215 - 1515) (1516 - 1563) 1564 The term “Puritan” first used
Calvin dies
William Shakespeare born
1577 Alliance between England and Netherlands;
Francis Drake sails around the world (to 1580)
1587 Mary I dies; succeeded by Elizabeth I
1588 Defeat of Spanish Armada
1598 Boris Godunov seizes throne on death of Fyodor I of Russia
1600 Elizabeth I grants charter to East India Company
1603 Elizabeth I dies; James VI proclaimed King of England, Scotland, France and Ireland, as James I
1605 "Gunpowder plot"; Guy Fawkes and other Roman Catholic conspirators fail in attempt to blow up Parliament
1607 Parliament rejects proposals for union between England and Scotland
Colony of Virginia is founded at Jamestown by John Smith;
Henry Hudson begins voyage to eastern Greenland and Hudson River (Hudson Bay discovered 1610)
1611 Publication of King James Bible; approximately 85% of the New Testament and the first half of the Old Testament are rendered as Tyndale translated them
English and Scottish Protestant colonists settle in Ulster
1620 Separatists (“Pilgrims”) land at Plymouth Rock on Cape Cod, Massachusetts, in the "Mayflower"; found New Plymouth
1643 Scots adopt the Solemn League and Covenant
1647 Westminster Assembly drafts Westminster Confession of Faith and the Larger and Shorter Catechisms
1648 Scots invade England and are defeated by Cromwell at battle of Preston Pride's Purge
1664 England siezes New Amsterdam from the Dutch, change name to New York
1665 Great Plague in London
1666 Great Fire of London
1667 John Milton publishes Paradise Lost
1670 Secret Treaty of Dover between Charles II of England and Louis XIV of France to restore Roman Catholicism to England
Hudson's Bay Company founded
1679 Act of Habeas Corpus passed, forbidding imprisonment without trial
1687 James II issues Declaration of Liberty of Conscience, extends toleration to all religions
1688 England's 'Glorious Revolution'; William III of Orange is invited to save England from Roman Catholicism, lands in England, James II flees to France
1689 Convention Parliament issues Bill of Rights; establishes a constitutional monarchy in Britain; bars Roman Catholics from the throne; William III and Mary II become joint monarchs of England and Scotland (to1694),
Toleration Act grants freedom of worship to dissenters in England