Jennette mccurdy in her underwear pictures

My wife (38) grew up very sheltered. She was actually a virgin when we met in our early 30s and had never even masturbated until after we got together. I’ve slowly tried to encourage her to explore her sexual desires more. Recently we read a book together that introduced her to kink and explained some basic kink terminology. We went through the book together and each made a list of potential kinks we’d like to explore together. We kept it semi private so that we could only see what we mutually agreed on and therefore neither of us felt self conscious about what we were into. One of the things she wanted to explore was porn. She had never watched porn before. For weeks now she’s been saying she wants to try it but has been nervous about it. She’s been self conscious that she won’t live up to it. Last night I finally talked her into it…
I should mention now that I’m a bit of a sissy. My wife has no idea. Usually I’m thinking about cock more than pussy and it’s a struggle to even get hard to fuck my wife. I spend most of the day edging to sissy porn and talking online to my new domme sissy mommy who I’m absolutely smitten by. She encouraged me to write this account of last night. Hehe.
Back to the story at hand. I knew my wife would want to have sex last night because she told me she was ovulating and we’ve been trying to get her pregnant (which I’ve failed at so far—probably because I’m a pathetic sissy). I asked her if she wanted to finally try porn and she agreed. I edged myself all day. And not normal edging like a normal straight man would do. I would rub my little cock like it was a clit and stop if it ever got hard. I did this for hours. This method usually made it very difficult for me to get hard with my wife and even if I could I would usually cum almost immediately. It made me feel so pathetic. But I couldn’t stop it. I had to edge. I had to rub my little clit all day. My balls were aching and full of cum. In fact it had been days since I had cum. I had been edging for days.
When the time came, we got my wife’s computer and both got in bed with just our underwear on. We laid next to each other. My wife grabbed her vibrator and some lube and took her panties off, exposing her massive bush. When I say massive, I mean massive. It’s overgrown and comes out the sides of her panties. You can almost smell it just by laying next to her. Anyway, we got her computer and went to pornhub. I had to explain how pornhub works to her. How to navigate categories, preview videos, etc. I asked her what she might be interested in watching for her first time. She sheepishly said she might like to watch a lesbian video. This didn’t surprise me because she often tells me about sexual dreams she has with other girls. I think she secretly might be a little (or a lot) gay. So we go to the lesbian category and start scrolling through. She says she wants to find something with a little bit of build up. She is scrolling and stops on a video with two women she finds attractive. It’s called “kinky brunette gets submissive towards her hot therapist.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to start with something a bit more vanilla?” I ask.
“No, I think they’re hot,” she says.
We start the video.
There’s about 10 minutes of build up. It’s about a woman seeing a sex therapist and learning about bdsm for the first time. Telling her therapist she thinks she’s submissive and wants to explore it. My wife gets her vibrator out and starts rubbing her hairy pussy with it as we watch. I start stroking my little limp cock. She looks over at me from time to time to see my reaction. I assume she’s checking to see if I’m getting turned on. I’m still pretty limp. The only thing that starts to turn me on is thinking how my wife might be wondering why I’m so limp and pathetic.
Finally the video picks up a bit. The therapist asks the patient to get on her knees. Makes her take her heels off. Makes her tell her how submissive she feels and beg to eat her pussy. I’m imagining myself as the woman on her knees. Imagining my mistress as the woman in the chair. That’s right. My mistress, not my wife. I’m thinking about what it would be like to serve my mistress. Beg her to suck her cock. To please her. This starts to turn me on. I’m finally getting a bit hard as I continue to rub my cock. My wife is getting turned on too. She starts to moan a bit. I wonder which woman she’s imagining herself as. I think to myself that she’s probably also wishing she were the sub on the floor. Wishing she could taste the therapist’s pussy.
The video starts to get really steamy now. The domme woman forces the sub to rub herself and occasionally slaps her pussy. Finally, in the hottest scene, the domme woman sits on the sub’s face. Grinding her pussy into the other woman’s mouth. Meanwhile the bottom woman is rubbing her pussy and clearly enjoying being dominated. While this is all happening, my wife turns up the speed of her vibrator. By this point she’s very close to cumming. She’s moaning and very into the video. She’s stopped looking at me at all by this point. She’s focused on what’s on screen. I’m fully hard now. Edging myself and trying not to cum myself. I’ve been edging for so long that by the time I actually get hard I’m ready to blow. This whole scene is almost too much for me to contain it. I’m picturing myself as the woman on screen having her face sat on. Only it’s not pussy I’m eating, it’s my mistress’ ass. Picturing myself getting my tongue deep inside her hole. Imagining her smell. Imagining the taste of her hole. I’m not even watching my wife at this point. I’m fully immersed in my own fantasy of being used. But I know I still have a job to do. I still have to fuck my wife. So I hold off from cumming. Barely. But my wife doesn’t. She cums hard. Moaning and convulsing as the domme on screen is grinding on the sub’s face and bending over and slapping her pussy.
After she cums, my wife turns off the vibe and pulls it out of herself. On screen the two women start making out as the scene comes to an end. I know it’s time. I shut the computer and throw it to the end of the bed. I lean over and start kissing my wife. I pull her on top of me and slide inside of her soaking wet pussy in one motion. At this point I’m only turned on because of my fantasy earlier. Once I slip inside her pussy I barely even feel any pleasure. It’s wet and somewhat loose and just doesn’t turn me on that much. But I know I need to cum in her. I’m close. I ask her if she’d rather me fuck her doggy. She eagerly says yes. She rolls off of me and gets on all fours and I get behind her and slide inside. This is my favorite position. She has a plump, beautiful ass. I can spread her cheeks in this position and admire her smooth asshole and imagine it as someone else’s. As a smooth femboy or trans girl’s ass. Wishing my wife had a cock and balls hanging below while I fucked her. At this point it’s all too much…her ass bouncing on me, my cock barely hard but my balls full of cum from edging for days, and my imagination running wild. I cum hard. I moan and collapse on top of her. I’m relieved I was able to perform and actually cum in my wife but ashamed of how I had to do it. That’s usually the case. Hell it’s always the case. I’m a pathetic sissy and my wife deserves to be fucked by a real man sometime. Maybe as we explore more porn she’ll realize that too…

Throwaway account bc I don't want to dox myself but here is the situation. Male SNCO here and I'm TDY with 2 other females (who are from a different unit), one is a SNCO and one is a senior officer. About 1 week ago we arrived at the hotel that we are all staying at. Once I got in I was on the phone with my spouse and wanted to send some pics of the hotel room. While on the phone, I took some pictures of the hotel room and since I was changing out of my travel clothes, one of the pics you could see my reflection in the mirror and I didn't have any pants (or underwear)on. It was a silly looking picture and I wanted to make my spouse laugh bc she was alone and sad without me. I wasn't "posing" or doing anything other than standing there with no pants on and a stupid grin on my face. Since I was exhausted from being up for the better part of 24 hours and also unpacking my stuff, I accidentally attached and sent the room photos and the one with no pants to the group chat with me and the other Soldiers I'm TDY with. When I asked my spouse if they went through and was told no, I looked at my phone and realized they went to the wrong chat. Without thinking I deleted them from my chat (with the slightest hope that it would delete from everyone's chat like you can on whatsapp). A minute later I got a text from the officer saying "wrong text" and I immediately and profusely apologized and said that was meant for my spouse and that I accidentally sent it to the group chat, and that I was so sorry and embarrassed and that it was in no way meant for anyone but my spouse. A little later I saw them both in person and it was a bit awkward but we all just acted like nothing had happened. After that, I spoke to the officer one on one and she said that she understood that it was an honest mistake but still called her SHARP rep to see if anything had to be done (calling the SHARP rep seemed unnecessary but it was already done) . She confirmed that she told the SHARP rep that it was an accident and that the text was meant for my spouse and not then. She also told me that both she and the other NCO deleted the text and that neither one of them was going to file any sort of complaint since they both knew that it was an accident. The officer also said that if the SHARP rep said that any action needed to be taken, that she wanted to handle it at the lowest level with just a counseling and that she would not recommend anything further. So far its been almost 1 week and nothing has been said and we have all been working fine together. Logically I don't see how this could go that far since it was an accident (which is abundantly clear since I also sent photos of the hotel room), and since no one made an actual complaint (if there is no complaint then what is there to investigate). The emotional side of my brain however has been a complete wreck. I've never been in any sort of trouble and my mind is racing to me getting kicked out of the Army, losing benefits, etc. I wanted to see if anyone had any advice and/or similar experiences.
***I'll have a week old McDouble with a side of food poisoning please

I don't know if this belongs here, feel free to remove it if it doesn't, mods. I just wanna put this out there instead of kicking it around my head.
What even is a Facebook community standard? Oh, I've read what they claim are their standards but in actual practice it seems as though they have no standard whatsoever unless I'm the one making a comment. For example, I was just account restricted and had my comment removed for calling someone ugly after they called me ugly. Just a really low-tier 'no, u' moment. Their standards make absolutely ZERO sense and it's been this way for awhile now. Reported the comment calling me ugly, just to see. Unsurprisingly, Facebook says that comment didn't violate standards.
Just off the top of my head, here are some things I've reported over time which Facebook claims doesn't violate standards: Animal abuse videos. Multiple. Apparently some ignorant villagers drowning monkies for views is okiedokie. A video of another group of ignorant villagers throwing a much smaller dog to their huge dog which then proceeds to rip the little dog apart is okiedokie. A picture of sonic the hedgehog ejaculating through his underwear with a perfect imprint of his enormous, erect pecker and the words "gotta cum fast" in a speech bubble was also okiedokie. A woman provocatively fondling her naked breasts while making erotic sounds and facial expressions at the camera while occasionally pretending to breast feed a doll was also okiedokie by Facebooks standards.
Don't get me wrong, I am not under the mistaken impression that Facebook is out to get me specifically. I'm just a little flabbergasted at how bizarre Facebooks standards have become.

We've been married for three years. F(31) & M(32).
When we were dating, I used to take sexy pictures for him and send them to him. He wouldn't seem interested and would reply very plainly sometimes monoslyllabically. His argument was that if we weren't physically together, my pictures wouldn't help him, on the contrary it would make him feel sad that we weren't physically together in that moment.
Fast forward to our married time. We both watch porn when the other is not home. We already talked about it, this is not the issue of this post. I understand that watching porn is a normal behaviour, I do it too, and neither him nor I do it excessively (I think).
However, the issue that bothers me is that I have found that my husband is downloading full albums of girls. One particular girl he revisits and has multiple albums of her just posing in underwear and bra/crop top. She looks very young. Because of the fact that she is not showing her body in full nude, I doubt that she is 18.
I did some research on the internet and I found that it is indeed very hard to make sure that the models are of consent age. One particular issue that stood out was models that look young + pose in skimpy attire and provocative positions, but never removing their lingerie is a tell tale that they might not be of legal age. She has chipped nail polish and everything in the photos looks so curated to show youth and virgin-like innocence.
Then I look at myself, early 30s body, etc, and I feel bad about myself. I wouldn't have a problem if he looked at videos of women that look like women. Though I would still be bothered if he downloaded picture albums of mature women.
Then I think back about my own experience sending him my photos and him expressing disinterest while he has albums of other women/girls on his computer.
At the end of the day I don't know what I'm angry about? What he likes or my insecurities? Or is it more to it?
Looking for insight, thank you.

Hi, I know some of you have been interested in Joost’s written stuff, so this is one of them. It’s a short story that Joost wrote for Boekenweek voor Jongeren (Book Week for Young People) in 2019. There’s more info about it here (in Dutch) https://www.vice.com/nl/article/qvgzpv/joost-klein-schreef-een-kort-verhaal-over-een-wilde-nacht-in-berlijn and there was also this promo video for it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx7wxnpxps0. It's been translated from Dutch - maybe not the most perfect translation but it's readable. Original in Dutch here. Enjoy

"How come he suddenly has cash?" I looked at Gurb, but he avoided my gaze. Louis never had money and yet he was buying another round. Meanwhile, a Moby song was playing and nothing made sense. "If he has money for drinks, he can surely pay me back, right?"
Just a few hours ago, I was alone in Berlin. Now, ten hours later, I'm standing in some obscure techno club with my best friends. Loud rock music with drunken shouting. "Hey, Miss Murder, can I make beauty stay if I take my life?" I woke up that day with a mild hangover from the lonely yet people-filled night before. Perfect conditions for a 20-year-old dropout.
The Hard Rock Café was the most beautifully ugly place in Berlin. Gurb had driven for seven hours straight in his mother's car, but we didn't notice. An iconic black Mini Cooper. Your body leads your mind, the beat never stops, and you can conquer the world. Louis threw in another crazy dance move. We were happy.
"Do you want another drink, brother?" Gurb asked me, half shouting. An evening filled with rhetorical questions. He saw me dancing and already knew the answer.
Gurb always had money. Louis, on the other hand, never did. Louis was also the youngest of us three. He had just turned 18. I wouldn't call him a cunning fox. More like a jack-of-all-trades. Like the time he made a lot of money on a Wadden Island with a group of boys. They sold large blocks of hash.
"Crazy dude!" I shouted at him. He yelled something back.
"Do you remember back then?" Louis said.
"Back then? Back then? Yeah man, of course!" I had no idea what he meant. "Do you mean the party?"
"Do you mean the party, he says! This guy. When I look at you like this, it makes me happy. The exact same kid is here letting loose just like back in high school!"
We knew each other from secondary school. He joined when I was in the second grade. He was very intelligent. Too young, too much knowledge of the world. His mother is from Brazil. We often went to his mother's place to play on the Playstation Louis and I had bought together.
I lived everywhere at that time. In the crisis shelter where I stayed for a while, for example, I wasn't allowed to have a Playstation. So we set it up in an accessible place, near school. It was always fun with Louis. Going together to the Apple Store. Taking all kinds of photos with all the webcams, posting them on Hyves, and then leaving. Louis always knew how to cheer me up.
"Aaaaaaaaaa!" There was Gurb with five drinks in his hands. Gurb was wearing a blue checkered shirt. Two buttons undone. Hair slicked back. "You look good, brother!"
"You look fresh too! We all look fresh!" Gurb said enthusiastically. Louis was wearing a completely white outfit. We quickly bought this before going out. He also bleached his hair.
"You look like the Brazilian cousin of James Dean in these clothes," I said. Louis laughed. "Let me take a picture."
Suddenly, the DJ switched to some kind of techno. "Ah, here Berlin briefly takes off its mask." I was fine with it all. Louis was talking to a lady.
Voluptuous breasts, I thought to myself. He gave her one of his two drinks.
"He's with a girl and he's thinking with his dick," I said to Gurb. "Let him be, tonight Berlin is ours!"
The bass kept pounding. "I simply don't have the patience for the club," I said to Gurb. He looked surprised. Like a sweet dog, tilting his head. "I'm just waiting for tomorrow. Can't do my thing here. Don't have patience for the already known. I want adventure and I want it now!"
Gurb started laughing. "Patience is a virtue." Yes. Patience is all well and good, but I think it's a waste of my time. Gurb grabbed my shoulder.
"I think it's time for another beer."
Louis and I were walking through Leeuwarden a year ago when suddenly a red Ford Ka stopped in front of us. It was Gurb, casually driving around the city. He invited us into his car. We hopped in. Since that afternoon, the three of us were together. A few months later, Louis got a tattoo on his ribs in honor of our friendship. It was the name of our group chat. Braddar Force Indigo.
There were also days when Gurb would take me for a drive around Friesland. He reminded me how beautiful Friesland is. The world doesn't spin there. The newspapers I threw away in the Stiens forest in 2011 could still be lying in the same spot, so to speak.
Just before midnight, I found myself in line for the restroom. My eyes fell on a pair of striking shoes. Cigarette smoke invaded my nose for the fourth time. "Müssen Sie eine Zigarette haben?" a female voice spoke to me. I felt like Tom Hanks in the final scene of Angels & Demons, where the new pope first steps onto the balcony. The curtains opened. There I was, witnessing an important moment in history. I was just told how I was sent by God, but my ears didn't want to hear any of it. At least that's how I felt. My mouth was empty. I had no words left. That's when I knew for sure. Berlin might really be as crazy as literally everyone says.
Dark blond, silky hair. Was this real beauty then? She wouldn't look 40, but I think she was. A true woman. Beautiful in all her elegance. I always joked about being interested in older women, but tonight one stood in front of me. "I don't smoke," I said to her.
Someone tapped me. "Please, just go to the toilet!" He was right. I hadn't peed in a while either. My urine was cloudy. "Glomerulonephritis," I said to myself on the toilet. This is an unusual condition. It's an inflammation in the kidneys, I thought I remembered. They should never have given me access to Google.
The evening progressed, and Louis kept buying rounds. "But seriously now. How does Louis suddenly have all that money for drinks?" I asked Gurb. He was outside smoking with a group of Swiss girls. I had strategically positioned myself so that I could always leave the crime scene if necessary.
"You shouldn't ask me," said Gurb. He was laughing with the temporary girlfriend group of Louis. Gurb has a beard. A lot of chicks like that. I get it too.
As much as I enjoyed Louis and Gurb being here for me, something didn't sit right with me. It couldn't just be about the money. "What's up with him?" I heard one of the Swiss girls say to Gurb.
Those kinds of questions really tire me out. "Not much, with you?" I replied.
They all started laughing. "That's not what she meant, brother," said Gurb.
"I couldn't care less whether she meant it or not. Send that brace-face back to Switzerland. Don't drive me crazy, alright!"
Actually, I hadn't drunk that much that evening. "Two vodka Sprites, please!" It's rare for me to get just one drink. "I always get two drinks, then you have to wait shorter for the third one!" Maybe the alcohol was affecting me more than I wanted to admit. Oh well, it was still the three of us against the world.
"Nice shoes, are those Prada?" I asked a random girl at the bar.
"No, these are fake. Why would I buy real ones for 600 dollars if I could just buy these for 20?"
"..."
I'm not very good at that. Talking. To women.
Louis and Gurb were in the smoking area now. It was less blue than the dance floor itself. My clothes already stank, so a visit to the smoking area couldn't hurt. "These people are so underground!" Gurb shouted. Louis was filming him with his phone. "These people..." There was a brief pause. As if Gurb forgot the only line he had. "...so underground!" All three of us burst into laughter. The alcohol flowed through our veins as if it came from the purest mountains. People seemed doubled and the room was full. We had been in the same club in Berlin for several hours.
"Leonardo! What are you hiding from the big boss?" I sometimes called Louis ‘DiCaprio.’ "You a rich guy, now?" I said, with an accent as if I were from the Bronx.
Louis started laughing. "Eh, you know nothing. Bullshit talk."
I had to laugh too. What was I even worried about? Friends are friends, with or without money. That shouldn't matter. Louis probably just worked for that money. Maybe it wasn't as bad as I thought. Maybe he just had enough to buy rounds. But what if my gut feeling was right? That feeling was never wrong. Except for that one time at the Holland Casino in Groningen. Even the best of us have slip-ups. I was just getting worked up again. When it comes down to it, Louis is one of the sweetest guys I know. I had to let it go. After all, it's still Louis.
"I think I'm going to have sex soon, man," Louis said.
"With who?" I asked immediately.
"That one girl."
"Which one?"
"The one with the boobs."
"Oh, her. Just be careful."
"What kind of reaction is that?" Louis asked indignantly.
I'd only had four drinks, but I was acting like a mess. Louis was right. I didn't understand myself. Where was my head at? I'm here in Berlin, supposed to be having the time of my life, but here I am feeling lonely and sad again. Joost once again couldn't control his emotions.
"Sorry," I suddenly said to Louis. "Sorry for my behavior. Been acting dumb towards you all night. It's unnecessary." Sometimes I have that. Mood swings. "Know that crime is never the solution. We've talked about this so many times. Yes, it's tempting and sometimes easy money. I sometimes find it amusing too, but it's always hypothetical. Ask me for help. I can help you, even with illegal things. I'll always have your back." The dancing was kind of over.
The words I had just placed on Louis's plate came from my heart. My Frisian, irregular boys' heart.
Crying in the club. I had never seen myself like that. Crying, yes. In the club, no. I never understood the taboo around crying. Or emotions in general. I saw myself in the mirror. They weren't tears of joy. They weren't tears of sadness either. It was me letting everything go. All the emotions I had ever felt. The emotions I felt between my brother and sister and myself because they wanted to take on a parental role over me, but I was in puberty, so I pushed them away. The emotions I felt when my old neighbors were supposed to take care of my dog, but didn't tell me that he was bitten by one of their dogs. They didn't have money for the surgery, they later told me. They were ashamed of their lack of money. My dog died from this injury. Even the emotions that were all jumping at once during the retake for my swimming diploma A, I let go of.
No emotions. Just for a moment, not feeling anything. Is that too much to ask for?
"You still don’t smoke?"
It had to be the voice of the woman with the cigarettes. I looked over my shoulder through the mirror. It was her. The one with dark blond, silky hair.
"Not to be rude, but this is the men’s room," I said. She took a step closer and kissed me on my lips. It tasted like more. We started kissing. It had been a while since I had had female contact at this level. It probably didn't look good and it didn't feel good either. She started kissing my neck. Slowly, I noticed the pressure in the erectile tissues of my penis starting to increase. "I really don't have time for this!" I thought to myself. The woman with the cigarettes started to slowly sink down until she was on her knees. I didn't want this. Not now, not like this. She unraveled my penis from my Polo Ralph Lauren underwear. Her tongue was blue. It was probably from cheap shots of alcohol.
Was this real beauty then? Was this the beginning or the end of her story? And had I become the boy my parents hoped I would be? I thought about the fact that this was once someone's little daughter. Somewhere in the world, an old man might be wondering what his daughter is doing. Am I really putting pleasure above my own morals and values?
With my semi-erect circumcised penis still exposed, I lifted her up. After giving her a kiss on her forehead, I pulled up my pants and left the toilets.
It was the usual last hour in any club ever. I met Louis and Gurb at the bar. "Should we have another drink?" I asked Gurb. "I feel like having a cocktail. Something sweet. Lots of sugar. What about you?"
Gurb looked at the menu. "A cognac would go down well right now."
"A cognac? You're only nineteen!" Gurb and Louis laughed. "Two Tequila Sunrises please!" I called to the bartender. "Also, two beers! Thanks!" I also got a beer for Louis. At first, I didn't want to, but I didn't want to spoil the mood either. Besides, I didn't want to show too much that it bothered me so much.
We danced away the last minutes. The club closed, and we decided to walk with the group of Swiss girls. Apparently, they were staying nearby.
As I lagged behind the group, one of them tried to start a conversation with me. "Are you okay?" she asked kindly.
"I'm fine. Just had too much beer. Makes me sleepy." Not true at all, but I've heard people say that.
"You’re tired? The fun has only just began!" And as she said this, she pulled something out of her inner pocket. Her clenched fist, shielded by a half jacket. Who is this girl, anyway? I thought to myself. She opened her hand flat, and right in the center of her palm lay two small pills with a smiley face on them. At least, they looked like it.
"Oh, I don’t do drugs. Sorry."
"Me neither!" And she swallowed a pill. "Now it’s your turn... Or are you scared?"
Scared? Who did this crazy Swiss witch (with really beautiful eyes) think she was. With her "are you scared". I'll show her who's scared.
"Scared? I’m not scared." I picked up the remaining pill and swallowed it.
Everything went in slow motion. Was this who I had become? Was this the same boy from high school? And just before I could swallow, I spat out the pill. She was shocked. I picked up the pill again, dried it with my jacket, and put it back in her fist. "Maybe later!" I shouted, running back to the group, over my shoulder.
I have nothing to say to 9 out of 10 peers I come across. Of course, I can be social. I can also have fun with random people in random situations, but that night, it just tired me out. I also didn't understand what we were doing there. Those girls found me strange anyway. Suddenly, I was the fifth wheel.
"We know this place where they go until 7 in the morning!" The girl leader of the group spoke. I wanted to go home. "If you guys want, you can go. Don't worry about me," I said to Gurb and Louis. The boys had a brief discussion. We agreed to stay for just a little while longer for some drinks. I consented. I was thirsty. "I'll have a Fanta, Louis."
Gurb had reached the last cigarette in his pack. Louis and a girl from the group were nowhere to be found. It didn't even bother me. This guy just walks around with some cash in his pocket and all hell breaks loose. After a night full of stimuli, I understood Louis. Of course, I understood Louis. He's a young god. Handsome, smart guy. But that didn't make me any less angry. It was purely about trust for me. Something inside me said I should stop subconsciously expecting things from people too. It prevents disappointment.
"Hotel please!" I jokingly suggested to Gurb. "Should you call Louis or should I?" I added. Gurb immediately grabbed his Android smartphone and called Louis. He put the call on speaker.
"Are you ready?" Gurb asked.
"Yeah. Sort of."
"What do you mean?"
"We didn't have sex."
"That's fine, right? Tomorrow's a new day!"
"I think I'm in love, man," Louis said.
"...," Gurb said, chuckling as he let out a sigh.
Once we arrived at the girls' hostel, it was already getting light. Louis was thankfully back. There were stains on his pants, around his knees. My focus was solely on arranging a taxi. Although the boys were still flirting, I was really done now. "How are we going to pay for this taxi?" I said a bit too loudly.
There was a silence. "Don't worry. I still have cash," Gurb said.
"Yeah, I knew you would," I replied.
My words clearly hit Louis. "What do you mean by that?" he said.
It was as if time stood still for a few seconds. "Exactly what I said. Better listen." Louis pulled out a small wad of green bills from his pocket. At least 400 euros. "I don't even want to see that money," I reacted. I walked away.
I'll just order a taxi myself.
"Why are you walking away now?" Gurb said.
"Twelve hours ago, I was alone too, and I had a lot more fun then."
"Do you really want to know how I got this money?" Louis said.
Yes, I did want to know. My whole evening revolved around that damn money.
He took a second of pause before he began speaking. "The answer lies in the Mini."
What on earth could be in Gurb's mother's car? Louis was trying to get into my head. "Taxi!"
Once in the taxi, the division was clear. Gurb was upfront, chatting animatedly with the driver. All adventures ever were recounted. Louis and I in the back. One of my best friends since I was thirteen. Funny how things turn out. It was quiet between us. I was in my head, rehearsing how I would bring up the money again. It didn't add up, and he knew it himself. "I don't care, you know," I said, hoping he'd break.
"What don't you care about?"
"About that money."
"What money? You're really a crazy woozy man." Louis burst out laughing again.
On the other hand, it was silent. Gurb had started talking about the driver's family. The driver didn't appreciate it. Gurb meant well. The driver smelled of alcohol. Or was it me? His nails were polished. Maybe his wife was a specialist. I bite my nails myself. Like now.
"In the Mini, oh yeah."
"Shut up. Illegal man."
"You'll never know."
"Stop playing. Just say it!"
Louis grabbed my head, pulled himself towards me, and brought his mouth to my right ear. "Why so serious?" he whispered. He didn't want to tell me.
"But always with this damn money, huh?" I almost shouted at Louis. I broke every silence within a radius of 10 kilometers.
"I'm trying my best, bro. It is what it is. I can't make it any different," he replied. It was clearly bothering him deeply. He ran his hands through his hair. "Sometimes people have to do things. And you know that better than anyone. Sometimes they have to do things they don't really want to or aren't supposed to do."
I knew this spiel all too well. Through all the drunken haziness, I suddenly saw a small glimmer of light. A tiny spark of sincerity. Louis was serious this time.
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to involve you in this. I'm sorry," sweat dripped from his forehead.
"You're serious, huh? Damn, man. What mess have you gotten yourself into now? Worse than Terschelling?" Worse than Terschelling would mean stolen goods. Maybe even violence.
"It's not what you think."
"The Adlon Hotel, right?" the driver chimed in. Always saved by the bell, that Louis.
Suddenly I hit my head against the seat in front of me. Of course, I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. The last thing I saw was Gurb waking up in panic from his drunken stupor. One by one, I started losing my senses. It started with the feeling in my fingers. For a brief moment, everything wasn't quite black, and I could only see a vague pattern of colors repeating inside my eyelids. You could compare it to the brief moment after the commercial break before the movie starts in the cinema. The movie was about to begin.
I knew I wasn't dying. At least not yet. Not like this. Not after an overall mediocre night out in Berlin. I found comfort in the image I forced myself to see. It was all in my head. There I was, unconscious.
I saw myself in a third-person point of view. It wasn't like I was actually leaving my body. More like there was a webcam hanging in one of the upper corners of the taxi.
As a child, I used to dream a lot about death. Nights spent awake.
At some point, I developed a kind of compulsive behavior. I kept swaying my torso from left to right with my hands under my head. It became almost like a workout before bedtime. Every night.
I called it dream shuffling. Just like I had learned to shuffle puzzle pieces or playing cards. Making things a little exciting for yourself. But what I almost never told anyone was that I was scared. I was afraid of burglars, who were very agile and muscular.
Especially afraid that they would murder me. I really wanted to know what death was like. It scared me.
These fear visions originated during an all-inclusive vacation in Turkey. I was 6 years old and already in bed. There was a big old TV in our hotel room, so I could secretly watch TV from bed. Every evening, my parents sat on the balcony. Here they discussed their day while enjoying a glass of alcohol. There was a Japanese animated series on TV. In the few seconds that I watched, I saw a scary creature climbing a sort of apartment complex via the balconies. The creature had hundreds of teeth and blond hair. It quickly entered to decapitate the people, then drained them and, as a final insult, robbed them. Dozens of carcasses of dead people were scattered around the apartment complex. The complex on TV resembled the resort where we were in reality, and the TV world merged with my surroundings. I became part of it. I saw people watching. No matter how loudly I screamed for help, they didn't react. The sun became very bright, and the people turned into nothing more than shadows. As the intensity of the sun increased, something became clear to me. These were not people. They had a sort of orange skin. Where I had previously thought it was their nose and mouth, it turned out that these shadowy figures did not have such physical features. They simply had three holes in their heads. The police tried to do something, but in vain. Since then, we always kept the light on in the hallway outside my bedroom. By rocking back and forth, from left to right, I could glance fleetingly at the beam of light under the door. That bit of light, escaping from the hallway into my room, gave me an advantage. It allowed me to stay one step ahead of the burglars. Pretty smart, right?
"From Jamaica to the world!
It’s just love. Why must the children play in the street?"
It was Bob Sinclar with "Love Generation" speaking to us through the taxi's speakers. We were stationary. I was conscious again, but I didn't feel alive at all. "How long was I out?" I asked Louis.
I could tell by his expression that he was relieved. Relieved that I was back. "One minute," he almost apologized. Louis gave me a pat on the shoulder. Gurb, on the other hand, was sleeping. He slept like a baby cub.
I put my right index finger on my forehead. It felt wet, but it wasn't blood. Blood feels different. Meanwhile, I kept hearing whistling.
"Be the love generation! Oh yeah!" It was still that same song by Bob Sinclar.
The earlier scent of alcohol had now been replaced by the smell of incense. It smelled like the same incense I had in my room. Sold to me as Tibetan 39 incense. I had bought it at a coffee shop in Rotterdam. I pulled up my notes on my phone. "Who lights incense in a CAR????" I let Louis read from my screen. He took the phone from my hands and started typing as well.
"Look at Gurb >>>" Gurb was so deeply asleep that his head drooped. His seatbelt held his torso in place, but his head ended up on the driver's shoulder. The man didn't mind. He didn't move. I made eye contact with the driver through the rearview mirror, and soon I found him. He winked at me.
We arrived at the hotel. Gurb awakened from his alcoholic hibernation. "Who's going to pay for the taxi?" I asked. Clearly rhetorical. I already knew I would take this one for the team, as usual. I refused to use Louis's money. It was uncomfortably quiet. "By card please," I said.
"I'll always protect you, Louis. You really need to know that. I care about you like my own little brother. I'll always try to help you. But you have to be honest with me. Can you do that?" Louis didn't hesitate.
"Yes. Yes, I can. I'll show you. It's really in the Mini." Meanwhile, the taxi driver's card machine indicated that I had insufficient funds. That couldn't be right. Maybe I had withdrawn too much that evening.
"I have cash in the hotel room," Gurb said to me. Gurb informed the driver in broken English that he would go get his cash. The driver agreed. Money is money, whether it comes now or later. As long as it feels good in your hands.
Louis and I got out of the taxi. "You're not going to light a cigarette now, are you?" Louis wanted to smoke. "Especially for stress. That's really for people who can't handle pain. You need to feel pain. Pain needs to brand you for the rest of your life so you finally learn not to do such stupid things." It fell silent again. My blood boiled. All pots were on the stove. I felt like Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen. "Show me then. Do it."
Louis remained silent and walked around the corner of the hotel. Towards the parking lot. I followed him. "You're not going to find much," said Louis.
"Why not? Are you a magician?"
"No. Just. Not much."
"So there's suddenly magically nothing in Gurb's car?"
"Stop. Get out. Get out of my head!" Louis shouted. Louis had had enough. He was done with the parade. Normally we dealt with hypothetical stories. Only this time it wasn't a joke. I was sure now. Louis had dropped his mask. The revolution had begun. The government had fallen and the dikes had broken. The people were in charge. "You shouldn't freak out like this. Always wanting more. Sweet boy, think about yourself."
After Gurb gave the money to the driver, he came to us. He had a smile on his face, lit a cigarette, and exclaimed, "Brothers!" Once with us, he hugged me. He started laughing. "Maybe I haven't been entirely honest either." Sometimes Gurb seemed like a 38-year-old man. In a positive way. He exuded confidence in a way I didn't often see. Affectionate, with a hint of authority.
We stood in the middle of a large parking lot. "Look. We've reached a point where I might not even care anymore. You guys are teasing me." It did matter to me. Maybe more than ever. I was supposed to be two steps ahead of them, but I couldn't figure it out. "I give up."
The delightful silence returned. Louis and Gurb looked at each other. "You guys win. Apparently, I'm not to be trusted as a friend."
From Louis's expression, I could tell he disagreed with this. "Not true. Come to the car."
We arrived at the car. Louis unlocked it and searched for the trunk button. Gurb had started his third cigarette. "It's a corpse, isn't it? Say it now. I can still help you. I can still help us. I can book a ticket for you. We can get you out of here," I said to Louis.
"Just wait. Nutcase."
"Why won't you accept my help?"
Louis started laughing nervously. Or at least it seemed that way. Perhaps a sly laugh too. Had Louis killed someone? "It's not a corpse. That can't be. You wouldn't be stupid enough to use their ID. You're smarter than that. So it must be something stolen. Haven't you found that button yet?"
Suddenly, we heard a click. Louis had found the button. Somewhere, I didn't want to know. Shouldn't I just trust Louis? Wasn't that the whole point of friendship?
Finally, the moment had arrived. I placed my right hand in the slot of the rear hatch. Something in me doubted. Still. I still doubted. Louis looked dead serious. "You wanted to know, didn't you? Then you also have to be man enough to accept it." Louis was clearly not joking. Or was he acting again? "Pussy," Louis said. I looked away. "You're afraid of what's inside, huh? You're afraid of the real Louis." He began to laugh manically. "Open that thing, man. Nutcase!"
I started laughing too. Why did I make such a big deal out of it? Sweat broke out from every pore in my body. It was even a bit damp in the no man's land between my scrotum and my anus. A tropical climate. It had been quite an adventure the whole evening. I took my hand off the rear hatch and first gave Louis a hug. Not some half-hearted birthday wish. No, a real hug.
"It's okay, buddy," Louis said to me. I had no idea what he meant by that. It fit the moment though.
It was really time now. I opened the rear hatch.
"Where is it?"
"In front of you," said Louis.
"In some secret compartment?"
There was nothing in the trunk. Absolutely nothing. An empty trunk. For an empty evening, in an empty Berlin, with an empty group of guys. I didn't get it.
"You won, man," I whispered. "You finally fucking done did it."
I couldn't believe my eyes. Empty? There was still nothing in the car. Louis just stood there. Emotionally, I was a wreck. I had felt every emotion this evening. Seen every color and smelled every scent. I was done. My body was ready. No longer needed. My mission was complete.
"But why did you do this?" I asked Louis, laughing.
He scratched his chin. It felt like the end of a bad movie.
"I sold our Playstation. Wanted to tell you only after I had sorted everything out again. I terminated my lease. Had some debts, and I also wanted to have some money for once. Once not empty-handed in the club. Once not dependent on my best friends. This is not who I am... I know how much that Playstation meant to you. It was ours together. I should have just told you."
"… and how does Gurb actually make his money?"

So to be brief and to the point, I’m 100% sure my sister is smelling my underwear in my dirty clothes bin. I realized this a few weeks ago when I noticed my clothes were arranged oddly in my bin. Meaning the outfit I wore the day prior wasn’t at the top. It was towards the bottom. Most of my underwear were at the top and turned inside out. I would like to add the FIRST time I picked up on something odd was when I lived in a different complex and I was in a rush for work and I had just showered, hence me ending up bringing two pairs of underwear to my bathroom. I left one discarded and balled up on the basket on the toilet lid and when I got off work the underwear wasn’t how I had it at all! It was inside out as If someone was looking at the inside or trying to see if it had…well idfk cause I don’t mess with anyone’s underwear! I thought it was my roommate who lived with me at the time but idk. I went in old apartments bathroom, saw my underwear in a way I didn’t leave them AT ALL and got a very disgusted and irritated feeling! I grabbed them and put them away. Feeling very uneasy. Now, I’m in a new apartment, my sister is staying with me and I noticed the same this is happening in this apartment as well.
I feel sick to my stomach thinking she’s sifting through my dirty clothes for god knows what! Even more disturbed that my weeks dirt underwear are at the top of the bin all turned inside out. I keep up with my downstairs hygiene so idk what she’s doing. Or why. It honestly doesnt matter.
So I did something as a test. I placed all my undies over a few dirty clothes at the bottom and put some over them…..
Boom! It happened again! I asked her if she was going through my things and she said no (I felt like she was lying. She even started got up to move around and fidgeting when she was previously sitting). It’s only me and her in my apartment. So it can’t be Casper! I say okay. Put the basket in my room away from my bathroom and go on about my day! I get off today (a week or so later) and same fucking thing! I’m getting pissed at this point! Like WTF are you looking for?!! None of her stuff would be in MY dirty CLOTHES! Or in my room or bathroom for that matter. She keeps her stuff away from mine! So today I gathered everything, ever slip of undies and placed it a certain way at the bottom bottom and put other clothes over it a certain way (yes! I know crazy behavior!) and took pictures and now I’ll wait and see what happens. If anything other than one pair of boy boxers is at the top of my bin that’s when I’ll know she’s been going through my dirty clothes!
I want her out of my shit cause I shouldn’t be worried about this weirdo behavior from family in MY apartment! It should feel like home! I should be comfortable. At peace. Happy. Not like I need to add cameras or take evidence pictures to catch you doing whatever disgusting shit you’re up to. I’ll wait a week or so and see.

I need advice. I hadn’t talked to my ex in literal years. I’ve tried reaching out in the past and he would never respond because he was in another relationship. He had remained friends on Facebook with my brother and one random day he commented on a post I tagged my brother in. The dopemine rush I got from just that was unreal!!! After his comment I just said well hi and he liked it and that was that. Fast forward to a couple weeks later my mom was posting memories of family trips etc on Facebook tagging my brother and I. And he starts liking the posts. So i went to his page and looked at a recent picture and gathered all courage I had and messaged him. I told him I never realized how ginger he was until now and happy early birthday! We’re old now (he 34 and I 32)! Because his birthday was the next day. To my surprise he responded right away, saying he’s just ginger on his face and balls not his head hair, and thank you!! So what does my dirty ass do? I told him to prove it lol and he says what’s there to prove? I don’t believe you have big tits and you know where that lead! Lmfao! He then starts saying he wants some birthday cake and not the cake you’re thinking! Literally wanted me to come to his house that night. I was flabbergasted because I thought he was engaged? Did him and ole girl break up? They had to of because he wouldn’t be responding to me him he was with her. I didn’t even ask because it’s not my business. He proceeded to keep asking my plans that night and I’m sorry but I was not prepared for all that I wanted to look GREAT when I seen him so I asked if I could have a rain check and he was like idk can you? I told him I liked that and of course, and he was like ok then and I left it as that and he continued to text me at midnight saying what’s the word raincheck? And I’m thinking like obviously bc if I just ran right over I’m clearly still whipped after all this time. So now it’s the next day his birthday april 27, and he asks what time is cake served ? Like bro am I dreaming?? Bc this is insane god what plans do you have ? I went out bought all new makeup, new outfit, sexy bra, underwear, lmfao I got to looking my best. He was over his sisters having some drinks with them and my brother was with his friends out having some drinks so I ended up meeting my brother at a bar nearby to my exs house when I was waiting for him to say what the plan was. He randomly just shows up at the bar we are at. It was so crazy being next to him, seeing him, hearing his voice after so long. I’m getting emotional just thinking about it. I bought him some bday drinks and we all had a great time just catching up. He’s done great for himself. I’m really proud of the person he’s become. My brother was like so we’re all curious what happened to ole girl and he was like none of your business (just as I thought) but he later told him she was a bad alcoholic and never knew if he’d come home to her in lingerie or a bad bad fight. So he made her leave. I have no idea how long it’s been since then. 2am came fast and he invited my brother and I back to his place. We just hungout there talking and smoked one. Until it got real late and he said he was tired and was calling it a night. Nothing happened. I hugged him and wished him a happy bday. And we left. I was sad but relived bc I didn’t want to seem that easy. He texted me once I got home saying thanks for the drinks and it was nice catching up and he would’ve had some cake if it wasn’t the three of us. After that, he texted me the next day because my brother lost his keys somehow so he was asking if yo the three of us. After that, he texted me the next day because my brother lost his keys somehow so he was asking if he ever found them I almost thought he was just trying to keep on a conversation. And that we did, we talked about the past the present things going on in our lives our jobs. Or dogs, how our families were doing who died. Sent pictures back-and-forth of stuff. The weekend after I seen him, he went up north to open up his camper and said that I could’ve came, but I would’ve been bored because there wouldn’t have been much to do. I’m kicking myself now because I should have just said I’ll go. I don’t care about being bored as long as I’m hanging out with you, but I was too dumb to even think of that. He even brought that up, man logic I guess. His whole ride up north to his place he was sending me dick pics and I was sending some stuff back so literally I started putting this whole scenario in my mind like we were gonna maybe start hanging out again. I really had no big expectations. I just wanted him in my life again. We only spent three years together when we were real young and I made some dumb choices back then which I totally regret and if I didn’t make those choices, my life would be so different today. I don’t think we would have ever broke up. He was the love of my life and still is because I have never loved anyone like I have loved him. We kept texting. I would ask him how his day was or he would ask me how my day went but it wasn’t as much. Now it’s been 3 weeks since I’ve seen him and 10 days since we even talked. Idk what to do. The last time we talked, I kind of made a fool out of myself telling them about fantasies of having my panties cut off with a knife then put it to my throat and yeah he was laughing but after that, I haven’t heard anything from him. I do too much sometimes and I embarrass myself and I think that’s exactly what I did. I want to reach out to him. I want to talk to him, but I kind of feel like it’s in his hands. What do I do? I almost feel like he’s just not interested. Was he just looking to get laid that night but then why would you proceeded to talk to me for almost a week and a half every single day, continue to send dick pics and talk about inviting me up north. It doesn’t make sense I don’t know what’s appropriate and what’s not in our situation. I know that he’s probably still hurt about his ex. They were with each other for over 10 years and we’re gonna get married. I’m sure that has left him hurt in someway, but obviously it’s none of my business. I just don’t know what to do.

I honestly don't know where to start. My dad has never been a good person for as long as I can remember. I (18) have 3 siblings. 24,23 and 4. Growing up me and my siblings were always abused. We would get thrown into walls, beat until we were bloody and weak. Handcuffed to our beds and couldn't get up unless we screamed out and asked. We couldn't get water unless we asked. We couldn't use the bathroom unless we screamed and begged. Even then my dad would stand outside the bathroom and if we were there linger than 5 minutes he would open the door or even rip us out the bathroom. It was worse for both my siblings. I was my dad's favourite. I wish I wasn't. But it made things easier. I experienced what they went through but less. My brother used to wake up with my dad beating on him. Sometimes for things he didn't even do. My dad would fight us at the ripe age of 7. I dint mean whoop our ass either. I mean actually beat us. Chase us around the house, pull our hair punch us in the rips. Make holes in the walls from our body. And my mom stood by, watching. She too was afraid. Some days we were forced to get naked. He would bring people over like his friends or his family and they would watch him beat us in our underwear. We were kids. We were girls. Girls getting beat in front of grown men. Screaming and crying begging to stop and let us go. Nobody helped us. They just watched. They sat by and just fucking watched. Some came back and were still around my father but most left. They couldn't be friends with a man like him. I wish I could describe what that man had done to my brother but my sibling won't tell me. It's been years since my brother moved out, he's left that life behind him and I'm so thankful for it. My brother is happy. Living with his girlfriend and making music now. My sister's however, we all live with our parents. And every day, I see my mother in agony. He beats her. He Screams in her face. He throws knifes at hern and when she says she's gonna leave he throws himself in our garage and tells her he's going to kill himself. So she fights for him to stay alive. Because she still loves him even though she's being mistreated. Even though he's mistreated us. Her children. He cheated on her with his friend. (Let's call her B)
B had a child of her own, she came into our lives when I was in about 6th grade. She was horrible. She clearly wanted my father. She made up things about me and told them to my dad so I would get in trouble. She misconstrued my words till I was grounded for being disrespectful or thrown at my mother. My mom knew everything that went on. She saw her. B would push me into the walls and on the floor. They forced me to call her daughter my sister. Throughout my protests, they never stopped. I would actually get beat for saying she wasn't. She called my dad, daddy even though she HAD a dad. This is the woman my dad first started cheating on my mom with. My mom would coom and clean. Take care of him financially . Let this woman into our house. Into our lives only for her to turn around and fuck it up. One day I went to walk my dog and when I got back my father was in handcuffs. How funny. It wasn't me anymore. It wasn't us being Handcuffed. In some twisted fate there he was. Sitting in our lawn. 10 police cars all over my street. So many officers guarding the house and him. I cried. Maybe he was gone forever. I don't care about what he did. I care about how long he's going to be gone. My mother informed me that his mistress b scratched his face in an argument and he abused the fuck outta her in front of her child. Then took her phone and left. I prayed that day. I prayed he would be gone forever. I prayed he would never make it back home. And yet he did. My mom begged me and my sister's for bail money. And it's my mom. As much as I hate that man. I love my mom. I would do anything for her. I tried to tell her I didn't want to. He wasn't good for us but she cried into my arms. She didn't want my little sister to grow up without a dad. She was financially dependent on him even tho he didn't have a job at the time. I'm guessing he got a check because he was ex military but I'm not sure. He came back the night before thanks giving. Next morning he disappeared. Told my mom he was gonna kill himself then went silent. Mom begged me to talk to him. SHE said he was only willing to talk to me. She begged and begged " please baby, please I don't want to lose him" I couldn't say no. So I sat outside by the ring camera. Alone. At the age of 14 I talked my dad out of killing himself. By. Myself.
Now years later, B hasn't been in out lives and he's cheating again. My mother despises him. If he drops dead today she wouldn't care. She just wants to be a person. She's told us to pack a bag in case he goes crazy she's ready to leave. He's cheating on her with a woman from him new job. She found pictures of her nudes on his watch. I pray for my mommas safety. I will fight for her. I'm old enough now to understand that my mom was afraid too. I'm old enough to understand that sometimes you just need to put down a man if he hurts your family. He isn't my dad and he's not a real man. I wouldn't normally wish death. But he may deserve it.
(Sorry if there's typos I literally broke the right hand side of my screen so I can't see anything n I don't have money or a car to go fix it ) <3

Yall..I hate her just as much as you guys do, if not more considering I post on here a LOT. But I was in that live and she was NOT actively smelling her daughters underwear. She was folding laundry, had it in her hand and scratched her nose. That screenshot is manipulative and exaggerative.
While I agree she shouldn’t be showing her fucking kids underwear online whatsoever (like seriously, I’d be mortified if I was sissy.)
This woman’s a complete idiot and obv sees nothing wrong with that..but trying to make it seem like she was sniffing child’s underwear on her live is dangerous, fucked up, and totally not okay. I’m not trying to start an argument here but I really whole heatedly disagree with y’all painting that picture to make her look worse.
The cash make out video was flat out in our face tho, no denying that 🤢🤮🤮

Would it be considered biblical grounds for divorce where there is a situation where a married man has a relationship that seems incestuous but it can’t be proven that intercourse had happened? Let’s say this relationship is destroying the trust and respect in his marriage, but he refuses to listen to his wife’s concerns or attend counselling. He neglects his wife and takes his sister to the theatre, on outings, to a hotel over night, buys her gifts every time he buys gifts for his wife, buys her secret gifts and gives them in private, demeans his wife in the presence of his sister, defends his sister when his wife tries to set boundaries with the sister (such as asking the sister to call prior to coming for unannounced overnight stays), accepts inappropriate attention from his sister, such as Valentines Day cards, pictures of her in her underwear via text, sends pictures of himself to his sister, asks his sister to do special things for him that are wifely that his wife asked to do - and he says he prefers his sister does it.
There is no proof of sex and no admission of sex between the siblings, but he has said his sisters name during sex with his wife and asked for sexual attention from his wife after looking at his sisters sexy photo. They shared a room during their teens.
What if the wife is in absolute misery as the sister lords it over her. Can she divorce if she has given up hope of a normal marriage? Or must she stay married to her husband until (or unless) he confesses to incest?

I hope the title is okay for the rules.
I was recommended to post here but wasn't sure were to start. My mother was widowed when I was 1 years old. My biological father was much older than her, she was a second wife with 20+ age difference. After that she remarried her hometown sweetheart and adopted his 17-years-old son.
My dad was American, mom is Colombian. I was born in the US, then we moved for a few years back to Colombia, and we returned to the US when I was 4.
My whole life my mother constantly complained about the fact I was a girl. She would say things like: "If you were a boy, maybe we could have gotten more from you father' or 'girls are so useless'. All I was for her was the problem child. She took my inheritance and squandered it. Mostly on things for my step-brother.
Whenever she had guests, she would always introduce me and joke how I ruined her body and wasn't even worth it since I was a girl. Most her friends thought I had some kind of mental illness because of her lies about me being mentally 'behind' (she used the r word). She would often blame it on my gender, though. Saying because I was born a girl, I was clearly inferior.
During holidays, I would be left behind with a sitter. I was just too much of a 'problem child' and would ruin things for my 'sweet brother'. We only have one family picture from when I was 5.
If I got anything nice with my own money, my mother would take it from me if it was something like make up or clothes, saying I wasn't attractive enough or worthy enough to have such nice things. I should just stick with a plain face since it will make it easier for me to find a job when I was done with high school. She had no intentions of letting me go to college.
But the worst part is she never protected me. My stepbrother is a predator. At first he just bullied me. Stealing my food, locking me in dark places. When I hit puberty though, he began to do worst things. Walking on me when I showered, even if I locked the door, stealing my underwear, watching me sleep, and he even SAed me when I was 16 and he was 29.
My mother blamed it on me, saying I was tempting her poor sweet boy.
I was saved by my biological half-brother and his wife. They took me in at 16, finished raising me and put me through college with the help of my paternal family. Even my father's first wife pitched in and has always been kind to me. She's more a mother to me than my mother was.
Now I'm 29 years old, I have a good career as a nurse practioner and I'm saving to buy my own home. My mother found out about this and has been demanding I give her my money because she is my mother and my money should be hers. She also demands that I pay my abusive step-brother's student loans.
Since I refused to fall on my dear mother's demands, she has now gone online to post I am a 'temptress' that is trying to ruin her son's life and that I refuse to pay her back for all the care and love she gave me over the years. She even had some women that are supposedly my aunts join her in this. I never met any of my maternal family. As far as I knew, my mother was an orphan. Now I suddenly have three aunts that have seen how bad a person I am.

So, certain people feel that Dan was falsely labeled a sexual predator & they have been supporting Dan's decision to sue the makers of QOS.
Without going into graphic details, "All That" alum Lori Beth Denberg publicly came out and said that Dan preyed on her & that the guy was also a zoophile.
Obviously, we don't know for a fact if Dan is a pedophile, but I feel like the people defending Dan don't know what a pedophile actually is.
There are pedos who have never sexually abused children & they are called 'non-offending pedophiles".
Even if Dan is not a pedo, his treatment of Lori Beth Denberg proves that he is a sexual predator & the doc proved that he was abusive in other ways as well.
In late 2023, "Zoey 101" star Matthew Underwood sent an email to a fan in which he discredited the victims of Dan's abuse & called people who were criticizing Dan online "QANON supporters".
When Underwood wrote & sent that email, Angelique Bates, Jennette Mccurdy, Alexa Nikolas, & many others had already come forward about the abuse they endured by Dan & he discredited them by saying "Dan was nice to me, so he's not a bad guy". To this day, Underwood has never publicly or privately apologized to the victims of Dan's behavior.

A while back I posted a question about when and how you knew that polyamory was for you. Well, now I know. I'm not going to write polyamory off completely because a lot of the issues I am having are not necessarily because of polyamory. But many of them would have been a lot less likely to surface in a monogamous relationship. I am ready to wish my wife well on her polyamory journey, but I have decided that I am not going to be a part of it. If you are looking for some good suggestions on how NOT to do poly, please read on.
My wife and I have been separated for over a year. I am the one that left. I was in a dark place, in large part because of the stress of our relationship, which had devolved into constant conflict punctuated by twice-weekly couples therapy sessions. I remember telling myself, "I must get out of this relationship or I am going to die." I'm not going to pretend like I was a great partner at that point. But I also won't take all the blame for our marriage ending. My wife was obsessed with this concept of the "all or nothing" marriage, that if I wasn't meeting all her needs it was supposedly a sign that I didn't love her enough. She was constantly criticizing me, told me I was unattractive and boring, that she couldn't imagine growing old together. I would just shut down. I was not showing up for her, for myself, or for the relationship. I knew this, so I ended it. Hit rock bottom, gained 30 pounds, felt like human garbage for a while, and then started turning things around. Spent a year learning healthy habits, assertiveness, boundary setting, and a host of other relationship skills. Felt like I was ready to get back into a relationship. Forgot how much it hurt to be with her and remembered all of the times it felt good. Made the mistake of going straight back to my ex to see if we could try again now that I have done work on myself. Told her that if I didn't meet all her needs, that she could go outside the relationship for whatever ones were unmet. She was dating two other people at that point, and said okay on the condition that I would be sexually and romantically exclusive with her. I agreed, and then, immediately, began to regret this as problems started happening. Here are just a few of them:

• I asked her to give me some clarity about who I was to her and what her intention was with this relationship. She would say no, she wanted to just figure it out as she goes along. I realize now that I never enthusiastically consented to our relationship, because she would not tell me what type of relationship structure I was consenting to. Shame on me for just going along with it for the month or so that I did.
• Week 1, we made date plans together (mani-pedis!), she cancelled them to prioritize her other relationships. This started a pattern that continued the whole time we were together. I have read the posts on here about being intentional about dating your spouse while you are having NRE, and I wish she would have read them. I felt pretty neglected and unimportant to her multiple times a week, often for days at a time. When I would try to talk about this with her, she would brush my concerns aside or say we can talk about it later.
• She would be on her phone the entire time we were hanging out together, texting the other guys. I tried to feel okay about this but it always felt like she was somewhere else when we were together. I know she does not do this with her other boyfriends. For example, last week, she was on a date. I try not to contact her when she is on dates because I don't want to interrupt. She had not told me about the date and said she was going to be working, so I sent a few texts through the night to check in. She was very good about not responding to them. So I know she can put her phone down, she just chooses not to do it when she is with me.
• she suggested we have a date night, phones down, to connect with one another. I show up and she is still in bed, spends an hour on her phone texting, gets annoyed with me that I ask her to do the activity we planned to do together, and then continues to text her boyfriend the whole night, even after I asked her what happened to the phone down plan and she acknowledged that she had made that plan but was not following it. We slept in separate beds even though it was a sleepover date.
• on multiple occasions she would be sexting with the other guys while i was in the same room with her. I told her I would go home if she was doing that because it made me uncomfortable. She said that was a good boundary but then kept on sexting while I was with her. One time, on what was supposedly my "date night," we were planning to have sex, and right in front of me she pulls out her phone and starts sending pictures of herself in her underwear to her boyfriend and sexting with him. Another time, she handed me her phone so I could look at the instructions for how to take apart our couch, and a sext popped up from her boyfriend. I told her I was going to head out and she lied and said that it was from hours ago and that she just not cleared the notification yet. I know this was not true, because they had been conversing all night, and a notification with a message from hours before would have been replaced by the later messages.
• We never really finished moving into our house before we separated. She asked me to help set up the bedroom upstairs in our house and told me we could have a night together in it. I moved all the junk out, cleaned the room, made the bed (which was the bed we used to sleep in together before we moved). Every time I go over there, there is a new bodily fluid stain on the bed, different sex toys strewn about, crusty condoms in the bathroom trash can. We still have not had our night together in it. I don't think she even said thank you to me for setting it up.
• aside from one or two times that I can think of, she repeatedly brushed aside concerns when I would raise them or just stonewall me. I would ask for time to talk about how I felt. She would say okay and then schedule things over the time we planned together. The one solution that she would offer me was to wait, because things would get better in the future. This did not happen.
• I have a platonic friend that I go to the ballet with (I'm autistic and ballet is one of my main special interests). She told me that she was not okay with this, that she felt jealous about it, that she was going to take space from the relationship because she didn't have the emotional bandwidth to deal with it. Meanwhile, she has two other non-platonic relationships and expects me to be able to handle the jealousy that I feel about that.
• She told me that she just wanted easy relationships and didn't want to do any personal growth or work on her jealousy. I felt like this was an unrealistic approach to transitioning from monogamy to polyamory. I suggested we start couples therapy again to help us work through this transition, and we had one consultation and then she said she did not want to do it.
• I suggested a date to her (farmers market and walk the nearby trails) and she scoffed and said "how long is this going to take?" even though her calendar was open and I could see she had nothing planned for the weekend.
• She suggested a "date" to me- that she would work while I cook for her and walk the dogs. Frequently our time together ends up being me doing vacuuming, laundry, sweeping, etc... I don't even live with her, although I do pay 2/3 of our mortgage. She definitely does not do chores at my apartment and contributes nothing towards the rent I pay for it, even though she benefits from me not being in the house because it makes it easier to have people over. Even though I do this kind of husband stuff for her, she says I am just "one of" her boyfriends. She does not ask the other men to help with chores or contribute financially.
• Although she required me to be romantically and sexually exclusive with her as a condition of us getting back together, she was generally not sexual or romantic with me. She is very sexual and romantic with the other guys that she is with. She does not ask either of them to be sexually or romantically exclusive. I feel more sexually frustrated and lonely being with her than I did when we were separated. I don't think she has any obligation be attracted to me or want to be romantic with me, but I also don't understand why she would have this requirement that I commit to her exclusively or why she would want to be in a relationship with me if she is not interested in me sexually or romantically.
• I told her that if we were going to keep doing this, I wanted the same rights that she has to see other people, because I was not getting my needs for intimacy and connection met in the relationship. She said no and that it was non-negotiable.
• I ran into her on the street near my house while she was biking by with one of the new guys. She said "this is awkward" and then rode off without stopping to say hi to me or introducing us. She called me after that to say sorry, I told her I was feeling really anxious about things and needed reassurance, and she said "okay got to go," and hung up on me.
• I told her I wanted to end our so-called "relationship" and she guilt-tripped me, bullied me, and told me I was going to regret it because I didn't give her enough time to fix things, and that its not okay to bail on a relationship. I relented and gave her more time and things just keep getting worse.
• I asked her if she had time for a date or fun stuff to rebuild our connection after this conflict. she said no, she was way too busy with work and that she had to focus on that for the next 10 days. Then she had a sleepover date with one of the other guys.
• The most recent one was that I was looking at the statement for our shared credit card and see that she used it to buy lingerie, which I assume is for her herself or for her other relationships because she does not wear lingerie around me even though she knows I really like it. Our agreement is that the shared credit card is for shared expenses only- dog care, house stuff, and that kind of thing. We both work full time and have our own separate bank accounts and credit cards in addition to our shared account. I don't know why she would have done this. She said she didn't remember doing it. It seems like it would be a hard thing to do to accidentally type all of the credit card details into a website and click submit.

I sometimes wonder if she acts like this because she is trying to "get back at me" because she is upset that I left last year. And then I feel like I am being extremely paranoid and I need to get off of this shitty roller coaster before I start to lose my grip on reality. So that's what I am going to do. My experiment with this new relationship structure is over. I am planning to let her know that I am leaving her this weekend, and this time I am not going to relent. Good luck to the rest of you, and may you find better relationships than me.

Soooo this is lowkey embarrassing to talk about, and I don't wanna seem like an attention seeker because I'm not looking for attention--I just genuinely am curious to know if I'm overreacting.
When I was 5-7, I would have playdates with this girl who was also my neighbor. She was known as the "mean girl" (not like the stereotypical "popular" kid, but just plain mean) among kids in our town. When I would visit her house, she would say, "Let's play doctors!" and she would make me get on her bed. Okay, that's normal, right? But it didn't end there. She would make me take my pants and underwear off, and she would "examine" my....well, you know, down there, because she had to as my "doctor." I felt uncomfortable but I didn't say anything because I was scared of her. I also thought it was okay because she had said that it was necessary when playing doctors. Then a few minutes later, she took out a camera (I remember it was an actual camera, not a toy) and she started taking pictures of my private area. I still remember the embarrassment I felt after she finished taking the photos. I should probably mention that she also touched me there with her dry, dirty hands, because, again, she was my "doctor." It was super painful. After all that, I just felt really uncomfortable and like I had done something wrong. But as a 5-7 year old I didn't know what to think of it. Idk why I randomly thought of this incident from my childhood, but even now the feeling of being scared and embarrassed resurfaces when I think about it. I saw the girl after 10 years last summer, and I don't know if she remembers doing any of these things, so that's that lol. Sorry if the title is too harsh, not sure if this is even considered sexual assault since it was a girl my age, but I put a TW just in case.
Edit: I should mention that I'm a girl. That's why I wasn't sure if this was a problem. Idk if this changes anything. And yes, now that a lot of you have said it, I realize that something similar had probably been done to her and I feel so sorry for her.
Edit 2: I see a few different takes on this, and it really helps to see various perspectives, so I appreciate that. In no way am I trying to victimize myself or blame the girl, btw. Just wanted to know what everyone thought about this incident objectively (or perhaps subjectively.) And this is not some weird p3d0 post as a few of you seem to think. That's truly disgusting. I just have good grammar for a random high schooler on Reddit ig??? 💀 Anyway thanks for your time and input guys :) Sorry I'm such a yapper 😭😭

Hello! I'll start talking about myself, then about my boyfriend, then how our relationship went down and how we got back together. Sorry for my English in advance.
So. I'm Brazilian and a 20 year-old Law student. I'm very empathetic, and I came from a family with many challenges - financial and emotional. My parents marriage isn't the best, and I grew up in a pretty hostile environment (in the sense that my parents were very strict about grades, and my father is very aggressive in general). However, they did the best they could with what they had. Last year, I came to live in another state, 7 hours away from home by car, because I got into one of the best colleges in the country (currently second best at Law) and couldn't miss the opportunity. I've been learning how to be an adult more and more day by day. I've got a nice internship and work another job aside from that.
When I thought I was finally free from my mother's controlling behavior, I decided it was finally a good time to date someone. And so I began talking to this boy (at the time, a 22 year old) through the internet. He seemed wonderful. Spent three years in Romania to study (even tho he didn't get to graduate) and then came back to Brazil to pursue his true passion, International Relations. We hit it off pretty quickly and started officially dating after a month.
At that time, even thought he had dated multiple girls in the past, I was his first serious relationship. Even today, he says I'm the only girl he ever felt (and still feels) love for. I got to know later on that he had Bipolarity, depression and Borderline Personality Syndrome - all of those conditions that weren't being treated or medicated for months.
He had problems with money, problems with dates, problems with compromises, problems with his grades, problems with his addictions (cigarettes). He didn't know exactly how to make a girlfriend feel safe, he would often not include me in his routine, sometimes he wasn't careful with his wording... and many other things. Every time I talked about our problems, he would only say "sorry" "I can't guarantee I'll actually change" "maybe I'm not the one you're looking for". He followed a LOT of girls, and always told me "I don't check out Instagram anyways so it's nothing".
Then, after 7 months in the relationship, I went over to my mother's house for Christmas and New year. He also went to his dad's house at that time. We cried a lot when we had to part, because we did absolutely everything together.
Well. Once he got into his dad's house, he began to be more distant (if we chatted for 10 minutes a day, that was rare) and I was exhausted. I just wanted a conversation of some minutes, and I understand he wanted to be with his family, but a nice call at the end of the day or just a few texts wouldn't keep him from them. I talked about that with him and I ended up being the one apologizing for not being understanding.
Phew...
Then, after two weeks of vacation, it happened. A girl going to my DMs and exposing an intimate conversation she and my boyfriend had just a few minutes ago. I exploded. She was Spanish. She wasn't even Brazilian. She was an online friend. He sent messages talking about how he wanted to kiss her on her bed, about how he was horny, asking her for a fit check, and sending pictures of his underwear.
She checked his Instagram later just to find out my name in his bio. So she went over and sent me everything. Every screenshot.
I was betrayed. I never thought he would ever do this to me.
I talked to him. He said he was sorry, that he loved me, that he didn't get why he'd done that, that he was stressed, that he would never do it again, that I was wonderful, that I didn't do anything wrong and he didn't want to lose me...
I'll be honest, at that time, I didn't want to break up. But I HAD to.
So I broke up with him, but told him we could try again if he made an effort, and we should also talk in person about everything. Told him he should seek therapy and a psychiatrist. My condition was that he would tell me if he got together or flirted with another woman until I got back from vacations so we could have that talk.
It didn't take long for him to start telling me he was feeling numb. That he didn't think it was a good idea to get back together. However, he would send me good morning and good night texts every single day, and sometimes he would text me that he loved me. Weeks later, when he stopped texting as much, I found out he was flirting with other girls. So I cut off contact, and told him that I couldn't believe he didn't keep what he promised me (telling me if he flirted with someone else). He hid it from me, and I didn't even understand why.
Days later, I found out he slept with a prostitute, and even told his friends to gang b*ng her. My heart completely stopped. I was heartbroken.
My own depression came out of hiding. So I contacted a therapist, and tried to appreciate the other things in life other than him.
Later on, I came to know he was also working on himself, getting medicated and all.
2 months later, I come back to the state I studied in, where he already was. I come in peace, relaxed, and happy to be in another place full of opportunities. But my heart still weighed.
Then I went to have that talk to him. He apologized for everything. We had a long, long talk about things, and I felt a lot better. But then he started getting physical; hugging me for hours, caressing me, kissing my cheek, kissing my forehead, putting his hand on my thigh...
Before anything could get any more serious, I went back home alone.
Then, another day, he came to get gifts I had gotten for his family (it was his stepmom's birthday, whom I cherished, and on vacations it was his little brother's birthday). I wanted to go to the pharmacy after that, and he asked to accompany me. I accepted, as it was late and I didn't want to go alone.
After sometime, he started talking about how he missed me. How he missed my jokes, my humour, my personality, my presence in his life. He hugged me. I told him it was a bit late for that. That I had given him the chance to have me back, and he didn't appreciate it.
Then we went to talk in a park. We sat together, and he started to tell me even more things. That he would see my clothes and other things in his room and cry, wondering why he'd cheated on me, telling himself he was stupid for letting me go and disrespecting me. He would often miss his way from home and go to my place by mistake. That he'd never stopped loving me, and that he was just running away from conflict l.
Well. I couldn't help it. I missed him like hell and he told me everything I wanted to hear. I ended up kissing him.
We then got back together oficially after three months of going out and sorting things out. He's been wonderful, everything I asked for and more.
But it still hurts, as you might think.
Most of the times I feel insecure he comes running over to my place to make sure I'm not breaking up with him again.
He knows I know about the prostitute, btw.
I just don't get it. He says he regrets it, that he regretted before and after. Well, if he regretted before, he could have just not done it. I didn't get anything... I still couldn't accept why he'd done everything. I felt ugly, I felt like I was not enough...
Then he told me about his past with childhood trauma, which explained a lot to me in my head. I cried when he told me his story, and apologized for what they've done to him, because the person who did bad things to him him was his family and never apologized. He'd never told this story to anyone.
That alone explained a lot of things in my head. His hypersexuality, his tendency to deal with things alone, etc. But the prostitute thing still gets to me.
I keep wondering what she'd looked like. How was it. If he liked it. Why he'd done it.
He says he did it because he just wanted to forget everything, but it just didn't work. That he's here for me now, that he'll never do such thing again, that he'll be good to me from now on...
Idk what to do. I want to stop thinking about her, but idk how.

So, growing up I was the oldest child and had a brother who was 4 years younger than me. I grew up in a strict Catholic household, but my parents grew a bit more open minded once I was in high school and college. My mother specifically is pretty open minded about most things these days, but my Dad still lives a bit in the dark ages.
When I was in middle school, I started to notice that I would occasionally go to look for something in my closet and couldn't find it. I would mention it to my Mom, who did my laundry, and most often she would say she didn't have it. Almost always, the piece of clothing would mysteriously appear in either the laundry or my closet days later. My parents told me I just owned too many clothes and my closets/drawers were simply too full, and that's why I lost these items.
In high school, this continued with more frequency, and I started to notice that it was always very particular items of clothing- plaid mini skirts, knee high socks, heeled boots, and sometimes, even underwear. I have several vivid memories of going to pull underwear out of my dresser and seeing that it had obvious stains or spots on them- that they were not clean and had definitely been used, but not by me. I also noticed that sometimes the items would be put in the closet in the wrong spots (I had everything organized a particular way) or they were hung up on hangers oddly. I started to think my brother was the one stealing my clothes, because it couldn't be anyone else in the house. I figured he was doing it just to mess with me, so I started confronting him about it- always in front of my parents and most often at dinner. Immediately my brother would yell and say there's no way he would do that, and my Dad would jump right to his aide and defend my brother. How dare I accuse him? It's not his fault that I'm messy/own too many clothes to keep track of. In private, my Mom would say that she couldn't think of another explanation, but that she didn't believe my brother was doing it and I shouldn't bring it up at family dinners anymore. I was getting increasingly frustrated as this was going on for YEARS. Eventually, I started doing my own laundry, and locking my bedroom door when I wasn't home. Even then, the same thing would happen occasionally. I knew in my heart it was my brother but it didn't matter, because any time I brought it up I was the one blamed for causing a fight. I even confronted my brother privately a few times, but he never admitted to anything.
Well, one day when I was in my Senior or Grad year of college- I was probably around 22 at the time- I wanted some alone time while the house was empty and I go to get my vibrator out of the bottom drawer of my nightstand, except... it wasn't there. I looked everywhere, even dumping out the drawer completely just to make sure it wasn't. My mom knew I had one, so the first thing I did was call her and ask if she knew what had happened to it. She didn't. So, I went into my brother's room and started searching. There, shoved into the corner of his closet under a bunch of random stuff, was a stash- complete with multiple of my items of clothing, shoes, handfuls of underwear, and my vibrator. To say I was pissed was an understatement. I was seeing red. My mom and brother were on the way home, so I took pictures, put everything back, and waited.
When they got home, I called them upstairs into his bedroom. I, calmly and even-toned, said to my brother that I wanted to know, once and for all, whether or not he'd been the one messing with my clothes for years, and that I wouldn't be mad, but I wanted him to admit to it if it was him. Immediately, he starts screaming for me to get out of his room, how dare I accuse him, etc. At this point, my Mom was pretty convinced herself as over the years there was never another explanation, so she tried to come to my aid and explain that it's nothing to be embarrassed of and he could talk to her about anything. She even asked me to go out of the room so they could talk privately. I eavesdropped from outside, and heard him say that it's not his fault I'm crazy and a bitch, etc. He continued to deny it. I had reached my tipping point. I burst into the room, threw open the closet door and grabbed the vibrator. I whipped around with it in my outstretched arm, looked him dead in the eyes and screamed "EXPLAIN THIS!" A look of absolute horror reached his face. He didn't say anything. So, I threw the vibrator at him, and then starting taking each other item out of the closet and throwing it into a pile in the middle of the room. Only after that was done did he finally crack. He started to sob. I told my Mom that I would be back, that she needed to talk to him, and I left the house.
A few hours later, I returned and my Mom basically told me that he admitted to stealing the clothes for YEARS. He wouldn't tell her what he was doing with them- she thought he was maybe putting them on pillows and pretending they were girls (he'd never had a girlfriend or anything) but I always thought- and still do- that he'd been wearing the clothes in his room. She discussed with him that she would be willing to purchase women's clothes for him so that he wouldn't need to steal mine, and that she would do it in private so my Dad wouldn't know. She also told me that he was incredibly ashamed and she was nervous he'd hurt himself or attempt to end himself because of my confrontation (never in his life had he ever showed signs of this). I told her to relay the message to him that all I wanted was an apology.
A few hours later, he came to me, totally unable to look me in the face, but he apologized for the years of stealing- and sometimes ruining- my clothes. He apologized for denying it every time he was confronted and even offered to replace every single item of clothing/underwear if I wanted (It would have been a couple hundred dollars). I thanked him for apologizing, told him that I would be more than willing to purchase him things myself, that I did not want him to replace anything (because no one wants their brother to buy them a sex toy) and that if he ever wanted to talk about things I was there. It was that day that I told him I was bisexual, had had a girlfriend in secret in high school, and if he was questioning anything I would be an open ear. Even then, our relationship was strained for a long time.
It's been like 6 years now. I moved out as soon as I could, and always said to my Mom that I moved out more to get away from my brother than my parents. My brother has been more open with me in the past few years about his identify and sexuality (I believe him to be demisexual) and the fact that he does, in fact, purchase and wear women's clothing on occasion in the privacy of his own room. He once asked me if it would be okay for him to wear lingerie- type items when he visits/sleeps over my apartment. I respectfully declined, stating that I still harbored negative feelings towards that whole situation and quite frankly, didn't want to see my brother in his underwear, and he accepted that.
Still, to this day, I harbor resentment towards my parents that they never took my side until there was hard, undeniable truth in front of them. I actually don't know if my Mom ever told my Dad- he could be totally unaware of this whole situation. I've always thought they treated my brother differently. I had to be the responsible one. I had to be the one that held it all together. I had to be the one to do things for everyone else, even at my own expense. I've never really truly forgiven them for not believing me.
Anyway, that's what I's unpacking in therapy this week. I hope the visual of me flinging a vibrator across a room made you smile if nothing else! Cheers everyone.

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Remember to check our Ai Generator: CandyAI

I was invited by a couple of friends to go camping a few days ago. I'm honestly still exactly not sure if any of it was real, but I wish to share my story nonetheless. It began last Monday, when friend number Six invited friends One through Five to a girls get away. She claims to have found this beautiful spot in the mountain on one of her hikes and she says it’s perfect for seeing the stars at night. I was skeptical at first, to be honest I don't really like being outdoors, but it sounded like an experience worth having, so I thought "why not, this will be a wonderful memory to look back on!". I had just purchased a new camera as well, so I was honestly starting to warm up to the idea. I could take pictures of our excursion into the woods and make cute little picture frames for everyone for their birthdays, it would've been so cute! But things did not go at all as I had envisioned.
So the day of the trip arrives, a bit faster than I would've liked, but honestly I think I was just anxious about… I kept feeling this weight in my chest that made it uncomfortable to breathe, but I was going into the woods, strange things happen to women in movies; Jason Voorhees, Sasquatch, Shia LaBeouf! Who knows what could happen! Not to mention there is always the chance I could fall into a lake and get covered in leeches, or get surrounded by wolves, or chased up a tree by a bear… Hopefully a very soft bear so I'll at least know one pleasure before I die! There are all sorts of fears I had envisioned before the day of the trip, but anxiety just be like that.
I met up with my friends at the trail and learned that friend Six decided to bring her bf along, which I was upset about but I guess he was just going to get a hotel room nearby so he'd be close enough to her to feasibly show up if we needed any help. She later told us that he worries all the time because his father went missing in these woods years ago and he's worried the same might happen to her. This is where I learned that men tend to stay out of those woods because men have been going missing in those woods for years, but according to friend Six, she's been coming to this forest for a while now and hasn't had any bad experiences. Hearing that did oddly put me at ease, but now all I could wonder at the time was what happened to all those poor men.
Deep into the night we're all chit chatting, talking about where we are in our lives, things that are bugging us, what our hopes are, and dancing to the music of nature… but which of course I mean we got shit drunk, smoked some great wee, talked about sex, laughed over silly anime scenes, and twerked to slipknot girly bops!. It was such a fun night at that point that I honestly wish I could go back and never let that night end. It was intoxicating how beautiful the sky looked, and when gazed up it was almost like we could scoop the stars into our hands and sip from the sea of stars. I was worried we'd just be on our phones all night filming tiktoks or something but even with no signal, no one really seemed to be too stressed about it, we all just kind of felt safe… Almost welcomed into the forest, like being embraced by a loving mother. But unfortunately, heaven isn't forever, and men come not but to steal, kill, and destroy.
As we were drinking we decided to tell some scary stories… or well I decided to because I thought "it's so cliché but we have to do it. It feels like tradition almost." plus I would've regretted it if we didn't do it, so fuck it, right? Right. So we go around telling scary stories to one another, and I mention to friend Six that I keep thinking about those poor men that went missing. I then asked if any women had gone missing, and surprisingly she said yes… it was way back in the 1800's but after that there had never been a single missing woman in that forest again. The forest was actually named after the first young woman who went missing all those years back, and now there are all these rumors about it but I don't believe in that stuff so I didn't really pay much attention… I kept thinking "I'll just wait for the manga… or the shitty Hollywood cash grab of it…" but I DO vaguely remember the history cause I find dark history lore to be super fascinating. So there was a time when the area had more Ojibwe people living here, before gentrification moved into town. She went on to tell us that The Ojibwe people eventually began to keep to themselves because as more white people moved in, more of their daughters went missing. There are yearly parades to honor the missing daughters and to spread awareness to those living in the town. The police try to shut it down but they still do it every year.
Not long after hearing that we hear something howl in the distance. Friend Three howls back and friend Five falls on her out of her camping chair laughing. I tell them to knock it off because the last thing we need is for her to accidentally attract a wolf during mating season! I don't know if that’s a thing, but it sounds like something that’s a thing… So I'm just going to assume that it is. Don't judge me. She then says "But what if it's Taylor Lautner? Or Joe Manganiello? Personally… I'm more of a Meatloaf guy myself… But you know… RIP… But Joe is pretty fine and my mom did always hope I'd marry a black man to get melanin back in our family… But I don't think a splash of melanin is gonna override this asian/african skin so… Anyways! So these guys come walking past our camp site, and we're all drunk and high so we're already all on edge upon seeing random men this deep into the forest, but friend Four gets up and says "who the fuck are you and what're you doing here!?" One of the men quickly apologizes and tells us they're actually out here camping as well. They said a friend of theirs found this waterfall in the forest that glows because it captures the moon's light. Friend Two hears this and asks if we can go with them, to which we all begrudgingly agree.
At the "mooncuzi" I like to call it, we all sit around this beautiful natural pool lit up by the moon, and we were worried it would be cold but I was surprisingly warm, if I had to guess I'd assume there's a magma vein under there or something? Idk, I'm not a geologist or volcanologist, but something kept it warm and it wasn't my tiny bladder! Everyone was really relaxed and the guys honestly seemed super cool, and guy One honestly seemed really nice. I call him guy One because he's number 1 to me, we're still together now, and we even have another partner now, so yay! We all began talking and some of us were hitting it off, clearly… but we had all been drinking and smoking more which, honestly we had stopped… but we couldn't pass up the opportunity to get cross-faded in a mooncuzi. Nuh. Nope. Not on my watch. But someone clearly didn't get the vibe memo, because friend Two screams out "bro what the fuck I said no!"
The next thing we hear is "You don't have to yell about it like some kind of cunt!" Everyone runs over to try and figure out what's going on. Turns out guy Five didn't like being told no. He and friend Two were playing a drinking game with friends Three and Four and guy Three and Four. We learned that guy Five dared friend Two to take her top off, to which she said politely refused, and the guys didn't seem to like that. They tried to convince her it's part of the game. One of the guys said she was already in her underwear anyway, so she might as well… My guy, One, and guy Two scolded their friends for their behavior, which is why guy Two and friend Two are married now… Guess nice guys don't finish last, huh? Anyways, They scolded their friends for their behavior, I remember my guy yelling "you never speak to a woman like that!" and "If I ever catch you trying to peer pressure a woman again I'll take your testicals in my hand and squeeze on them slowly until I know what it's like to feel one pop in my hand." and it was honestly the hottest thing I've ever heard a man say… a bit violent… but fuck was I glad I was in the water!
Guys One and Two apologized for their friends' actions the whole way back. I asked them why they remained friends with them and guy One had gone off to college while guy Two went into the service, so the two of them had been away for a few years, but they swore their friends never used to be like that. This was actually supposed to be a reunion hike of sorts since they both happened to come back around the same time. After meeting up with guys Three, Four, and Five though, they realized their friends had been warped by these podcasts about alphas and betas and maximizing your sigma or something, and tried to convince him to listen to some pickup artist that claimed to know the secret to unlocking the female brain. Also known as, stupid useless slop grifters make to get rich off young boys with zero confidence and zero bitches. Lastly, he tells me guy Three was actually raised by a single mother alongside his two sisters, so he really wouldn't expect that kind of behavior from him. Guy Four was always sort of sketchy but they thought he was "just being funny", men right? The only thing they felt was weird about him was this one time when they were teens his sister moved away and he got really quiet afterwards, but then he dated a few people that looked almost identical to her, but for some reason he didn't see it, so they started calling him "little sister" (or did they? oooo) or "Lil" for short, joking he had an undiagnosed sister complex… Ew. That’s all I’ll say to that. The last guy, Five, they said always seemed fine to them, they didn't elaborate, so idk what their idea of "fine" is, sorry to disappoint.
Not long after we got back to the camp we heard engines in the distance, and as they got closer and closer we all stared in confusion. No one should be riding vehicles out this way, and friend 6 knows her bf wouldn't come out here without alerting us.
The vehicles stopped after surrounding us with their lights pointing right at us. We heard the familiar voices of guy Three, along with 4 new voices. He whined about how we hyurt his widdle feefees or something obnoxious. I tried to listen but it's just so hard to listen to some overgrown pissbaby go on about their fragile ego. Guys One and Two went to confront guy Three and his posse, asking why they didn’t wait at the car. Guy Three told them they wouldn’t understand because they’ve given themselves over to feminist ideas and allowed themselves to become beta cucks. He told them that simps deserve to die so other men won’t be warped by feminist witch pussy magic like they have… Like we just met these guys and he’s already acting like we had sex… This man's logic was like a runaway train, the cars are all there but they ain’t making it to their destination. Guys One and Two continue to argue with guys Three, Four, and Five, before guys Six and seven come up behind them and put knives to their necks. At this moment I noticed a gleam in guy Three’s eyes. He now thinks he’s invincible… I can see the depravity in his eyes as he looks upon friend Two, stripping her down in his mind, imagining all the sick things he’ll do. And as if to validate my suspicions, he walks up to her and says “You never did complete that dare… How about we start a new game… But this time we won’t have any need for truths.” I watch as fear washes over Two’s face, as she begins to imagine what he is implying, almost as if his depraved thoughts were being projected into her mind, instilling suffering on her before he had even begun to touch her. She catches herself, refusing to give him the satisfaction of fear and spits in his face. She then tells him “you couldn’t even please your hand with a prick that small.” The look of anger on his face was honestly delectable. If I could, I would put it on canvas and call it “Portrait of a Scorned Man” or “Man who just realized being a dick doesn’t make yours bigger”. ANYWAYS, he then began to yell something about "it's up to real men to show women their place in society!" OOO so angwy! They started circling around us like starving wolves. One of them placed themselves against friend Five’s back and said "I always wondered if trans women looked different down there." Which angered friend Five, but not as much as it did friend Four who tends to be a bit of a hot head.
Friend Four may look like a pretty cute petite princess, but she's manlier than most men I know. She's a competitive marksman, as well as being a gymrat who likes to build cars on the weekends. She's also the girlfriend of friend Five, not that that’s important but I feel like it should be important. So anyways, she starts blasting right? And one of these guys yells "what the fuck they’ve got funs!? Who the fuck gave these stupid bitches guns!?" I then hear one of them try to antagonize her by saying "pretty young thang like you shouldn't be carrying such a big piece until she's used to it! AYO!" So she shot a round off at the tree he took shelter behind as if to mock him by letting him know his life is in her hands… She looked like a real boss bitch, like for real! That girl is HIM! She has always been him, she will always be him! While this was taking place, friend Six reached out to her boyfriend now that we could finally use the radio without fear of them taking it. We explained what was happening and asked him to bring help. He told us to tie the button down and to hide it from sight so that he could listen in while he headed to the station to get help. I feel so bad for that man, having to listen to all those screams, feeling completely powerless to do anything in the moment, but we’re so thankful to him for being there in the way that he was.
Gun fire kept ringing out as Four kept firing rounds into the forests yelling “I shoot to maim!” and “You’re not safe here!” hoping to scare the men enough to make them retreat because none of them seemed to have rifles on them… But then we hear it… The first scream… Everyone freezes in their tracks, their heart stilled by this sudden shriek of terror that seemed to only further race towards the all consuming darkness. The moment it stopped nothing remained but the slow encroaching crawl of raindrops and the rapid beating drums of the fear in our hearts. It's then that the rain came down like a closing curtain on the chapter of our innocence, because that’s when we heard the second scream, a scream just as chilling as the first, ascending high into the tree tops before we see something that shocks everyone to their core; the haunting image of a man’s face still screaming, a face still unaware its going to meet, a face that still hopes to be saved but never will. Within unison, as if hell had a chorus, we all screamed in silence as we turned to run. With no other means of safety, my friends, guys One and Two, as well as myself ran for the tent. We don't really know what happened after we got into the tent, but not a second went by that we didn't think we wouldn't be next. We know better now, but in that moment I felt both relief and fear for my life. I just kept thinking how lucky I was that I was fortunate enough to die with my dignity still intact… I kept thinking "at least those man babies didn't get to do whatever depravity they had in mind"
Well by now everyone knows what happened, it's been on the news. Those 3 guys and all of their cronies turned up missing… But what the news won't tell you is that we were saved by Mama Makwa, we call her that due to the sounds we heard, as well as the site we saw afterwards. The bellowing sound of vengeance that came in the form of a bear’s roar was as loud as the mean screaming they saw a 9 ft tall bear with skin dripping off of its bone like fur. We later learned that men referred to it as “Slippy Skin” aka "Wejuk", as it seemed the bear would change appearance depending on who gazed upon its visage, but this was not "Wejuk". One by one, we heard those men scream for their lives, describing a creature with a mouth made of human hands that had palms covered by teeth shaped like hypodermic needles. It had claws that seemed like stone daggers that were etched by The Ojibwe. The men warned each other "Don't look into its eyes!" before proclaiming how sorry they were for the things they'd done… They complained of the putrid stench suffocating them as they were pulled into its gaping maw. They screamed of the creatures rotting viscous flesh melting into their own, and making their skin a part of it, as if their skins were fuel for the fear this best could instill by its mere dominion over them. But we never saw that creature… Instead, after the screams stopped, we were greeted by this beautiful creature that looked like a bear, only it had this glow about it, and its fur seemed almost like the softest of opalescent feathers. Its eyes looked just like the aurora borealis, and she was mesmerizing. We felt safe, and welcomed, and most of all protected… After everything that happened, I think we will be coming back, because we know Mama Makwa will be there to protect us. We believe Mama Makwa is an avenging spirit born from the fear those lost daughters felt, here to make sure no other women ever have to suffer like they did within this forest. We also now understand why those men all went missing. My boyfriend and friend Two's husband weren't attacked by Mama Makwa… Only the men who felt any sort of ill intent toward us women that night saw Mama Makwa in that form, the form they confused for Slippy… But knowing there is a safe haven for women out there, I'm thinking we will have another girls night next year, anybody wanna come?

Hi, everyone! This is my first time creating post because I don’t know where to talk.
I’m 24 F. Last year, I was in almost perfect relationship that people see I’m so happy. My parents and friends are really supportive of my romantic relationship. I knew him from dating app. He’s (24 M) a last year uni student just like me that’s why we really get along together. He really like perfect guy, he would pick me up at 7 am to go to work together, and accompany me when my dad sick.
One of his friend, back then warning me that he would be totally different 100% change, if he’s at the lowest point in life. But all other of his friend said I should feel lucky to have him because he’s kind and loyal. At first, it made me confused but then slowly I see the truth.
Whenever we’re in argument and fight, he would order me to hide it from his friends. I’m a sarcastic person, I know my words sometimes hurt. When I give sarcastic jokes to my ex, he would pinch me until black and blue. If I said a joke with something sarcastic and bad, he’s threatening me that he will pinch me many times and I should be silenced. Luckily, I took a picture of his pinch on my thigh and send it to him. He said sorry but then he told me, I shouldn’t overreact to it because the bruise only stay for 4 days, but in fact it stayed for 15 days.
So sad, I didn’t count this as physical abuse because I just think maybe he’s also joking too. But, is it not equal my sarcastic joke with physical jokes? I don’t realize it until after 5 months of break up that it’s physical abuse after my friend point that out.
He’s also yelling at me in the supermarket because I didn’t listen to him properly. I asked him to apologize but he thought, I deserved it.
Context: We’re going to supermarket to see some discounted chicken. He saw the chicken, but at that time I said to him, I wanted to see some discount on underwear. I feel that I already said to him, but it turns out he’s focusing to much on chicken and he didn’t pay attention to it. I know it my mistake. I know that at that time, he’s tired after work. But he really drag my hand and yell at me in public. I said to him, I didn’t deserve to be treated that way but he still said I deserved it.
He’s guiltripping me about my past regarding my virginity. Yes, it’s his first time with me. But after, we broke up, turned out he slept with several girl from dating app. (I chose to be friend with him after break up, but know we blocked each other).
Last before he blocked me, he said he’s already have a girlfriend and his new girlfriend in her first time relationship and still virgin.
It haunts me so bad. My past history of this abusive relationship, hinder me to dating again. I don’t want to go back with my ex, I want to start new romantic relationship. However, I can’t get over all the abuse that I had because I’m afraid I get abuse relationship in the future. (He guilttrip me again that no guy wants me). I feel like, I get sabotage by that thinking.
Is any of you are survivor of abusive relationship, how do you guys overcome it and start a new relationship?

I have been living with my Japanese boyfriend but I recently caught him cheating and have since kicked him out of the house. I signed a contract for a rental property under my name and my boyfriend's name is also listed as a tenant. We live in Tokyo. He has admitted to cheating.
When I kicked him out I provided him with his valuables such as wallet, laptop, phone, some clothes, etc. He has a lot of belongings left in the house and I have been trying to find a way to move it all out for him. Whether it be to his new place or to a storage container. However, he has not replied to me when I asked him what step he would like to take moving forward. Would the next best step be to just leave everything outside the apartment and tell him he has X amount of days to come pick it up or should I just pay to have these items thrown away? The big items he has left are a PC, washing machine, mattress, and fridge.
In a moment of rage, I also posted pictures of the girl he cheated on me with on X (twitter). My account is private and the pictures do not show her face. They are pictures and videos that she sent him of her breasts or legs with underwear on. I do plan on deleting them but I'm wondering can this come back and bite me in the ass?
I think my main questions are:

1. What are the legal repercussions against me?
   
2. What are some good moving companies that I could use for a fair price and are fast?
   
3. Am I allowed to kick him out even though his name is listed as a resident on the contract I signed?
   
4. Is he allowed to sue me for anything? (I know he searched up if he could sue me for posting the pictures)
   
5. Any tips on what to do moving forward that I might have missed?
   

Thank you.

My husband (early 30s) had a kid when he was a teenager, my SD (14f). He was a single parent until I (early 30s) came into the picture about 7 years ago. I stepped up and filled a "mom" role, and my SD now calls me one of her parents. I'm listed with the school as a parent and do everything a blood-related parent would do. SD's bio-mom only visits about once per year, if that, and occasionally talks to SD through text message.
My husband and I are generally on the same page when it comes to parenting. We give SD $50/week for an allowance, have chore expectations that include cleaning the cat litter and taking out the trash, and expect her home after school by 5pm unless she arranges for a later time with us. The main point of contention in our relationship is the clothes SD wears to school. For context, we have no rules about what she wears inside the house, but outside of the house she has to look like she's wearing bottoms (she was into a style where shirts were longer than the shorts/skirt worn underneath), she has to dress appropriately for the weather (coats in the winter, etc.), and she can't have visible underwear. Everything else is free game.
SD doesn't often wear clothes that I think are inappropriate. However, there is one shirt I bought for her that has become a huge source of argument between my husband and I. It's a black, backless, crop top t-shirt almost identical to this one: https://www.amazon.com/Coloquin-Women-Sleeve-Ribbed-Backless/dp/B0CFVJXH36 . When I bought it, I didn't realize that it was backless. I discussed the shirt with her after it arrived and told her that I wasn't comfortable with her wearing it outside of the house unless she layered it with a cami so that her bra wasn't showing. She agreed, and my husband also had subsequent conversations with her about the shirt when she wanted to wear it out the house.
This year SD started high school and has been wearing the shirt to school with nothing but a black lace bra underneath. Because the shirt is backless, the entire back side of the bra is visible. My stance has remained the same - she can wear the shirt at home any way she wants or she can wear it out of the house if she wears it in a way that does not expose her bra. My husband's stance seems to have evolved, though. He now believes that limiting SD's style will lead to resentment and a poor relationship, and that it's not a big deal because that's the style these days. He had a similar stance when SD wanted to start wearing corsets to school as an accessory.
I have a few concerns with SD wearing this shirt. First, I think that my husband and I should be teaching SD the importance of dressing for different contexts. Regardless of how ridiculous it is, people treat others differently based on their appearance and whether that appearance aligns with societal expectations for the given situation. For example, there's technically nothing wrong with wearing ripped jeans, Docs, and a Metallica shirt to visit grandparents but that doesn't mean it's the right time and place for them (speaking from experience). I think that SD should be learning how to dress in a way that expresses her sense of style in different contexts during a time in her life where the consequences for not doing so are minor. She's not risking losing a job, for example.
Second, having been a teenage girl, I know that adult men see teenagers dressed in certain ways as an invitation. I don't want to put SD at risk simply because of the clothes she wears. While it's true that men being creepy is never a kid's fault, and that those situations can arise regardless of what someone is wearing, I also know society is incredibly patriarchal and gives a lot of leeway to men - especially if their targets are dressed in a way they perceive as provocative. SD has already experienced some trauma in this department (we have had her in therapy already) and I don't want her to have heightened chances of experiencing this again. The risk v. reward balancing test leans too heavy towards risk, in my opinion, when wearing backless shirts that expose half of the lace bra she's wearing.
Finally, and somewhat related to my first concern, just because the school doesn't say anything does not mean the shirt is appropriate. SD's school has *no* dress code, and so students are free to wear whatever they want. I'm generally in favor of this, as I think schools overpolice girls while giving boys next-to-no rules about what to wear. However, just because there is no dress code does not mean that all clothes are equal. For example, I've worked at jobs without dress codes but I still would not have been able to wear a leather harness over my clothes without risking a write-up (something that SD has expressed an interest in). There's a value in learning how to operate when there aren't clearly defined boundaries that cannot be crossed. Not every situation is suitable for taking fashion risks, and school is, unfortunately, one of those places where it's best to err on the side of caution.
AMITAH here for not wanting SD to wear this shirt to school with a lace bra?